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Copypasta and circle jerk response to reddit culture or hivemind mentality. Primarily done to ridicule AITA sub or r/relationship_advice absurd nature.


To Everyone In My 8:30 Today I Was NOT masturbating!!!

    To Everyone In My 8:30 Today I Was NOT masturbating!!!
    byu/GoldFee8100 inWWU

    Part of a series of university/college copypasta that came from their respective subreddit and spread from there.

    so i was sitting in the back row of my lecture and i realized my fly was unzipped. I was trying to fix it up before anyone saw me. however, my zipper was caught in the boxers, and it wouldn't move no matter how hard i tugged. this was creating a commotion, and these 3 girls were starting to stare.

so, i started making grunting noises to indicate i was trying to fix my pants. however, it seemed like it made it worse because they started whispering and more people started to stare. so eventually i just gave up and walked out the room.

when i came back, everyone kept giving me weird looks. i am really sorry for today and i just wanted to clear the air.

    PSA: People who still drink Starbucks in NYC are the worst

      PSA: People who still drink Starbucks in NYC are the worst
      byu/PsychologicalLack698 incirclejerknyc
      As a born and raised New Yorker, I don’t understand how anyone in NYC, the coffee capital of the world, still chooses Starbucks when we’re literally surrounded by the best independent coffee shops in the universe. Are you fucking kidding me bro?! There’s literally hand-poured, single-origin beans roasted by someone’s uncle in the back of a Brooklyn warehouse, and you’re gonna opt for a soulless corporate chain? How basic can you get?

Do you even care about supporting small businesses? Or do you just enjoy being a cog in the capitalist machine, getting your watered-down PSL with three pumps of sugar while pretending to live a “New York life”? And don’t get me started on the lack of creativity. “Oh, look at me, I’m holding a Starbucks cup, I’m soooo New York.” No, you’re not. You’re just lazy.

If you’re paying $6 for a cup of coffee, at least give it to the places where the baristas know your order AND your name. Seriously, go to any corner in Bushwick, the coffee shops have actual culture. Meanwhile, Starbucks’ “baristas” are misspelling your name on purpose.

EDIT: First time posting on circle jerk ny & I’m so proud of myself cause I really got a bunch of you thinking I’m dead serious. Using this as evidence for my claim that media literacy should be a required course before students graduate cause some of yall are dumb as hell lmaooo.

      So please imagine a two-panel comic starring the Heavy from the 2007 first-person shooter game Team Fortress 2

        TF2 Heavy Open Reddit then despair meme
        This subreddit doesn’t allow users to upload images as comments, so please imagine a two-panel comic starring the Heavy from the 2007 first-person shooter game Team Fortress 2. In the first panel, which has a blank white background, he is giving the camera a thumbs-up, smiling amicably. Behind him is a desk with a powered-off laptop resting on its surface. The caption above him reads, “1) Open Reddit”, implying that he is about to log on to social media. In the second panel, captioned “2)”, the background is now black, the sheer intensity of its darkness somehow casting shadows onto Heavy’s back. The Russian man is now staring into a monitor, the contents of his social media jaunt unseen to the viewer, for better or for worse. It is likely that this is for the better, however, as Heavy’s blank eyes and relaxed jaw imply that his consciousness is no longer present even though his body persists. This image may be seen as a commentary on the objectively reprehensible opinions certain social media users may express under the perceived veil of anonymity, shared either to disconcert other users as a joke, or due to a serious character flaw, the likes of which may require the help of a therapist to rectify.

        Being downvoted on reddit sucks man.

          Being downvoted on reddit sucks man.

There’s something uniquely frustrating about being downvoted on Reddit. You put time and effort into crafting a thoughtful comment, sharing your perspective, or even just making a light-hearted joke, only to see those downvotes start piling up. It feels like a personal rejection, even though logically, I know it’s not. It's not just that someone disagrees with me—they’re actively saying my contribution doesn’t matter, that it’s not worth anyone else seeing. It stings.

What really gets to me is how impersonal and anonymous it is. There’s no feedback, no dialogue—just a faceless number that slowly erases your words from the conversation. It’s like being shouted down in a crowd, but you can’t even see who’s doing the shouting. Was my point misunderstood? Did I offend someone without realizing it? Or maybe people just don’t care? That lack of closure gnaws at me, making me second-guess everything I write.

Worse, Reddit’s algorithms treat downvotes like poison. If you get too many, your comment becomes invisible, buried at the bottom of the thread. It’s like you never even spoke, like your voice was silenced. And let’s be real—sometimes it feels like people downvote for the most trivial reasons. You used the wrong wording, or your humor didn’t quite land, and suddenly your comment is spiraling into the negatives.

It’s hard not to take it personally, even when I know I shouldn’t. I can tell myself it’s just the internet, that downvotes don’t define my worth, but the sting of being dismissed, of not being heard? That’s hard to shake off.

          No school, No Roblox

            No school, No Roblox
            byu/Odiekid inroblox
            I am a school bus driver & this morning picking up my elementary, this 3rd grader was crying & didn't want to get on the bus. His mom picked him up & put him on the stairs, & I greeted him enthusiastically to change his mood & welcome him on the bus. This did not work. His mom then threatened to call his dad. This did not work. As of now, I am blocking two lanes of busy traffic trying to get this kid on the bus. Suddenly, his mom tells him, "If you don't get on the bus, no playing Roblox today." He immediately stopped crying & ran on the bus. Thank you Roblox for making my job a bit easier today.

            BG3 has completely changed my wife

              My wife has for the past weeks been playing BG3, and it has affected her entire demeanor. She no longer speak with her normal accent but instead a posh British one. Even her body language is different. Like some James Bond villain.

She now calls me "darling". And says a lot of catchphrases I assume comes from the character "Astarion". I haven't played the game myself but I get constant story bits from her gaming sessions. The other day she was going to show me something on Instagram and her recommended was just a wall of images of this vampire guy. Alot of her downtime is now spent on listening to interviews from the voice actors from this game.

This is not the first time she get influenced by pop culture. We watched Breaking bad together and she has since never stopped saying bitch at every available opportunity. That was over 1,5 years ago. She is a massive one piece fan and each time she watches it, there will be a week long period of random japanese phrases and anime behavior.

Someone please send help. I fear this is who she is now. I don't want to date a British person.