Copypasta and circle jerk response to reddit culture or hivemind mentality. Primarily done to ridicule AITA sub or r/relationship_advice absurd nature.
Here's the thing. You said a "trilby is a fedora."
Is it in the same family? Yes. No one's arguing that.
As someone who is a gentleman who studies fedoras, I am telling you, specifically, in science, no one calls trilbies fedoras. If you want to be "specific" like you said, then you shouldn't either. They're not the same thing.
If you're saying "fedora family" you're referring to the taxonomic grouping of brimmed hats, which includes things from stetsons to pork pie hats to bowler hats.
So your reasoning for calling a trilby a fedora is because random people "call the rimmed ones fedoras?" Let's get bowlers and top hats in there, then, too.
Also, calling someone a human or an ape? It's not one or the other, that's not how taxonomy works. They're both. A trilby is a trilby and a member of the fedora family. But that's not what you said. You said a trilby is a fedora, which is not true unless you're okay with calling all members of the fedora family fedoras, which means you'd call top hats, bowlers, and other hats fedoras, too. Which you said you don't.
It's okay to just admit you're wrong, you know?
Even recognizably so called "attractive" women like Sabrina Carpenter and Adriana Lima are ugly as fuck in my eyes. Women aren't attractive, they are disgusting, sex-tempting, succubus sluts. A woman's ass, boobs, thighs, and curvy body makes them all look like disgusting sluts, a whole bunch of succubi, that makes me vomit. Im not going to have sex with you, your female body and pussy are disgusting. Thank god I was born immune to female seduction i.e aroace
Its an infamous story on Reddit by u/LearnedButt, about a guy realizing that only his family had a specific knife dedicated to cutting poop when they are too big to flush. The original story had been deleted but an archived version can be found.
My family poops big. Maybe it's genetic, maybe it's our diet, but everyone births giant logs of crap. If anyone has laid a mega-poop, you know that sometimes it won't flush. It lays across the hole in the bottom of the bowl and the vortex of draining water merely gives it a spin as it mocks you. Growing up, this was a common enough occurrence that our family had a poop knife. It was an old rusty kitchen knife that hung on a nail in the laundry room, only to be used for that purpose. It was normal to walk through the hallway and have someone call out "hey, can you get me the poop knife"? I thought it was standard kit. You have your plunger, your toilet brush, and your poop knife. Fast forward to 22. It's been a day or two between poops and I'm over at my friend's house. My friend was the local dealer and always had 'guests' over, because you can't buy weed without sitting on your ass and sampling it for an hour. I excuse myself and lay a gigantic turd. I look down and see that it's a sideways one, so I crack the door and call out for my friend. He arrives and I ask him for his poop knife. "My what?" Your poop knife, I say. I need to use it. Please. "Wtf is a poop knife?" Obviously he has one, but maybe he calls it by a more delicate name. A fecal cleaver? A Dung divider? A guano glaive? I explain what it is I want and why I want it. He starts giggling. Then laughing. Then lots of people start laughing. It turns out, the music stopped and everyone heard my pleas through the door. It also turns out that none of them had poop knives, it was just my fucked up family with their fucked up bowels. FML. I told this to my wife last night, who was amused and horrified at the same time. It turns out that she did not know what a poop knife was and had been using the old rusty knife hanging in the utility closet as a basic utility knife. Thankfully she didn't cook with it, but used it to open Amazon boxes. She will be getting her own utility knife now.
[Edit: Common question - Why was this not in the bathroom instead of the laundry room? Answer. We only had one poop knife, and the laundry room was central to all three bathrooms. I have no idea why we didn't have three poop knives. All I know is that we didn't. We had the one. Possibly because my father was notoriously cheap about the weirdest things. So yes, we shared our poop knife.]
My friends sister laid a huge turd in the toilet. She couldn’t get it to flush. So she just casually strolls into kitchen while me and my buddy are watching Friday night videos, and grabs a pocket knife from the junk drawer. Goes back towards the bathroom, my buddy is hey what the eff you need a knife for? So she says the toilet won’t flush. Their dad hears this jumps up and runs down to bathroom and screams who the shit this turd. Which brings mom into the bathroom she freaks out. No all 5 of us are in the throne room in admiration of her magnificent turd. The dad asks what is the knife for and his sister goes it’s what I use to cut them. Yeah that’s what she said. It was silent until her mom asked how long have you been cutting turds with that knife, I am dying my friend is in tears, well since we are all here I guess the secret is out so I get massive turds on my period mom. So for about six years mom. She goes to leave and her dad grabs her and says cut the cheese sweet pea and that’s your knife now. That’s it I can’t breathe I am laughing so hard. She is in tears her mom is mortified and her dad was trying to be supportive, my buddy and I are being total jackasses.
Her dad pulls us aside and threatened to kick the shit out us if a word of sir turdly of bummertown gets out of the house. We never said a word about it outside of their house but we were brutal to here at home.
I literally cannot with the new wave of midwest emo anymore. It’s been absolutely ruined by American Football reissues, Modern Baseball tiktok edits, and this “Hot Mulligan” slop. Don’t even get me started on how every band just sounds like a mediocre copy of Cap'n Jazz with worse mixing and generic woe is me lyrics. Give me some actual unlistenable 2007 Bandcamp demos from some kid in a Denton Texas basement who never left his parents house, or the one EP that got 87 plays total and still has that perfect nasally whine and off time tapping. Mainstream midwest emo is just sad white boy self loathing core for people who discovered tiktok emo during the pandemic. I'll stick to my 320kbps rips of stuff nobody's ever heard of, thank you very much. At least it still feels like losing.
It an old copypasta from r/nba about the Minnesota Timberwolves back in 2016.
Stop Calling My Team Spooky
I'm fucking sick of it. I'm sick of going into every thread and seeing countless people telling me to relax because my team "is so spooky"..
There is nothing fucking spooky about a team that blows a 12 point lead in the last two minutes...
There is nothing fucking spooky about a team that is on pace for FEWER wins than they had last season with a FUCKING SAM MITCHELL COACHED TEAM.
There is NOTHING FUCKING SPOOKY ABOUT A TEAM THAT COLLAPSES MORE THAN THE CUSTOMERS OF LIFE ALERT
But I have to go into every FUCKING single thread in this sub about my team and listen to countless people tell me to calm down because dude you're team is so spooky bra
No stfu YOU DONT TELL ME HOW TO FEEL. My team hasn't made the FUCKING PLAYOFFS SINCE 2004. I've heard this rebuilding term thrown around for a FUCKING decade so don't even talk to me about trusting some goddamn process Philly fans I'm sick of my team
When I die I want the Timberwolves to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one more time
AND ITS FUCKING -12 RIGHT NOW THIS GODDAMN STATE
I love living in North Carolina, but man, North Carolinians sure do love to complain about the weather. They complain all summer about how hot it is, then as soon as it starts to cool off, they're already complaining about the cold, and continue to complain until it finally starts to warm up again, but then the complaints about the heat start up again, of course. There's like a 2 week window in the Spring and Fall where everyone is fairly content, and that's about it. There's also the brilliant observations about how, it started to warm up, but then got cold again. People point this out like it's some crazy thing, and "that's North Carolina for ya!" Wow! Temperatures shift here, this doesn't happen anywhere else!
