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Valorant

Archive of all Valorant related copypasta including of pro players, gaming organizations, Riot’s circle jerk, Valorant metas and Twitch chat to troll fans.

Chronically online loser, you have 9400 posts on this platform only spreading hate

    Chronically online loser, you have 9400 posts on this platform only spreading hate. If you hate so many things in this world at some point you must look inward. You hate yourself and the life you live so instead of sitting in that feeling you constantly project those feelings to the world and things around you. I know you haven’t made a single notable achievement in your life so you cannot begin to understand what it is like at the highest level of anything. Usually if you have no understanding of something the best way to proceed is to keep quiet. 

    mwzera appreciation thread

      Its an old Valorant copypasta back in 2021 that started from an appreciation post in vlr.gg for the player ‘mwzera’. Back then mwzera had insane stats in deathmatch and pubs but never got signed to any T1 team leading fans to speculate on a what if scenario if he ever got the chance.

      STATS
      
      mwzera https://tracker.gg/valorant/profile/riot/VK%20mwzera%234324/overview?playlist=competitive&season=all
      cNed https://tracker.gg/valorant/profile/riot/ACE%20cNed%23carry/overview?season=all
      TenZ https://tracker.gg/valorant/profile/riot/SEN%20TenZ%230505/overview?playlist=competitive&season=all
      
      DEATHMATCH STATS
      mwzera - 86% win rate (thats the insaniest thing ive seen in a while)
      cNed - stats not availiable
      TenZ - 73% win rate
      
      RANKED STATS
      mwzera - 66.3% winrate (MVP of 95% of the matches) proof here https://imgur.com/StiJmpg
      cNed - 53.5% winrate (MVP of 13% of the matches)
      TenZ - 60.4% winrate (MVP of 15% of the matches)
      
      can you take your time to appreciate how insane mwzera is? without a doubt the most talented player to ever touch the game
      
      I'll try to explain briefly why I think he is the best player in the world
      Despite his insane aim and movement
      The best way to know if a player is a good duelist is RAZE. There is a BIG difference between a good duelist and a jett abuser
      If he is a good duelist, he needs to be good with raze.
      
      heat? not good with raze
      aspas? not good with raze
      xand? not good with raze
      tenz? not good with raze
      cned? not good with raze
      scream? not good with raze
      d3ffo? not good with raze
      derke? not good with raze
      
      Thats why I think he is undoubtely the best player in the world. If RIOT by any means decides to nerf jett and shift the meta we prolly not gonna even hear names like cned and tenz again :>
      He is not killing 40+ per map because when he joined VK he was forced to play a different role because heat is already a main jett... and lets be honest, every single duelist nowadays gets 20+ kills per map because team and setups are basically built around you (even steel managed to get 20 kills with it https://www.vlr.gg/29398/sentinels-vs-100-thieves-champions-tour-north-america-stage-3-challengers-playoffs-gf/?game=46692&tab=overview)

      According to the scientific logs found in the Mansion of Cinnabar Island, Vanity was born from a pregnant Steel

        According to the scientific logs found in the Mansion of Cinnabar Island, Vanity was born from a pregnant Steel, found deep in the jungles of Guyana, whose embryo had been tampered with to alter its DNA.
        According to the scientific logs found in the Riot Mansion of Bennett Island, Sakha, Zanks was born from a pregnant Shanks, found deep in the jungles of Vietnam, whose embryo had been tampered with to alter its DNA. It was held and studied in the mansion where a scientist by the name Zellsis performed horrific gene-splicing experiments that made it vicious and extremely powerful. It eventually broke free of the Mansion, destroying it in the process, and fled. It can be encountered in Cerulean Cave, accessible only after a Radiant has proven their skill on Fracture. 

        Pros Never Play Time

          SPOILER of the PRX vs NRG game.
          
          Kind of a bait title, I’m sorry for that. Sometimes pros do play time after planting a bomb, but not as frequently as they could, and it sometimes leads to the most mind-blowing throws I’ve seen.
          
          Take PRX vs NRG that just finished a few minutes ago. Davai vs Mada in a 1v1, everything on the line for PRX. The bomb doesn’t have a lot of time left. Mada is playing Yoru so no smokes. Why on earth is Davai dry-peaking from B Hall and not trying to play his life, extend the time, and win with the spike. Roughly 30 seconds had already ticked on bomb. He only had 15 left to win the round.
          
          I understand that bomb wasn’t planted for him in that position, but I don’t believe that a dry-peak when Mada already saw you is a better decision than playing time against NRG’s best mechanical player. Maybe someone can explain why this decision was made, and in general why pros tend to take fights instead of playing time so frequently, even when the bomb is about to go off. It happens so much and I always question why pros can’t have just a bit more patience. Pros are so incredible at everything in the game, but time management is frequently a weakness I see from pro teams, in my opinion.
          
          I understand things aren’t always black and white, pressure is huge in matches, especially ones like the example I gave, and players don’t always have this in their minds. But they have 4 other teammates who should be considering these things and advising their decision making, especially in such important moments.
          
          I’m only an Ascendant player so I don’t pretend to know everything. But in that scenario I’m playing time instead of taking a 50/50 virtually every single time, and I’ll win (in my rank) with that decision way more than 50% of the time. I guess this is more so a rant on the concept of playing time in 1v1’s at the pro level being so rare. And when pros do play time, whoever is playing time tends to win at a super high rate vs not playing time in 1v1 post plants.
          
          EDIT: I just want to add that a lot of people are saying he was trying to catch a timing, and yes I agree and understand that decision if bomb was just planted. Even with Mada knowing the strat, that doesn’t make it easy for him to bait Davai so quickly. But at the same time, to everyone’s point, at such a high level you have to try to outplay at the micro level, and it doesn’t always work out. I can’t stress enough how little time was left. Even getting Mada off bomb once will likely win you the round. Better to wait for the drop. Let Mada sit in window and burn even more time imo. 

          Lar0k vs BABYBAY in a 1v1, everything on the line for BBL.

          Pros Never Play Time 
          
          SPOILER of the G2 vs BBL game.
          
          Kind of a bait title, I’m sorry for that. Sometimes pros do play time after planting a bomb, but not as frequently as they could, and it sometimes leads to the most mind-blowing throws I’ve seen.
          
          Take G2 vs BBL that just finished a few minutes ago. Lar0k vs BABYBAY in a 1v1, everything on the line for BBL. The bomb doesn’t have a lot of time left. BABYBAY is playing Yoru so no smokes. Why on earth is Lar0k holding from B Hall and not trying to play his life, extend the time, and win with the spike. Roughly 30 seconds had already ticked on bomb. He only had 15 left to win the round.
          
          I understand that bomb wasn’t planted for him in that position, but I don’t believe that a hold when BABYBAY already saw you is a better decision than playing time against G2'S best mechanical player. Maybe someone can explain why this decision was made, and in general why pros tend to take fights instead of playing time so frequently, even when the bomb is about to go off. It happens so much and I always question why pros can’t have just a bit more patience. Pros are so incredible at everything in the game, but time management is frequently a weakness I see from pro teams, in my opinion.
          
          I understand things aren’t always black and white, pressure is huge in matches, especially ones like the example I gave, and players don’t always have this in their minds. But they have 4 other teammates who should be considering these things and advising their decision making, especially in such important moments.
          
          I’m only an Ascendant player so I don’t pretend to know everything. But in that scenario I’m playing time instead of taking a 50/50 virtually every single time, and I’ll win (in my rank) with that decision way more than 50% of the time. I guess this is more so a rant on the concept of playing time in 1v1’s at the pro level being so rare. And when pros do play time, whoever is playing time tends to win at a super high rate vs not playing time in 1v1 post plants. 

          You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

            AZER from osu!

            It was originally for AZER (an OSU player) back in 2017 which then got adopted for Alex19 in CSGO and so on. Nowadays its often used for whichever player people are cheering on.

            AZER (osu!)

            AZER isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such aim ability and movement with a tablet? Alex puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Cookiezi breaks records. Rafis breaks records. Azer breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

            AZER copypasta translated in 727 different languages

            Are Commercial Azerbaijan? You have fun? At the end of the minute you can see a player? Alex will sell a game anywhere, and if you want to see talents and fans, they are divided into teams. By deleting the selected URL, complete the menu. Assarba does not comply with the rules. You can save your data. I want to be afraid. 

            TenZ (Valorant)

            TenZ isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an aim and movement? Tyson puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. aspas breaks records. zekken breaks records. TenZ breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

            Alex19 (CSGO)

            Alex19 isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with fox? Alex puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. mang0 breaks records. Armada breaks records. Alex19 breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

            Just a heads-up me and my teammate are professional trolls.

              Alright team, just a heads-up me and my teammate are professional trolls. We're not here to win; we're here to vibe and make sure this game is unforgettable-mostly for the wrong reasons. We're aiming for a perfect 0-13 because, honestly, Iron is where the real fun begins. Who needs Radiant when you can be the king of Iron, right Don't expect any help or strats, we're here to ruin the game, not play it properly. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the disaster-we're taking you all down with us