Copypasta and circle jerk response to reddit culture or hivemind mentality. Primarily done to ridicule AITA sub or r/relationship_advice absurd nature.
So basically for context she is the goddess of all kinds of sex or sexual actions. Anal, oral, vaginal, footjobs, you name it.
She loves having sex, especially with people she considers scholars (a real life parallel would be someone who could name every single pokemon or an avid Reddit user like myself). She has black hair and style, basically goth gf haha and she has voluptuous breasts.
So what should I name her? I was thinking Clitalia (named after the female erogneous area in the poonani so to speak) but maybe that’s too on the nose? Any suggestions?
I (15c) remember one day I went to school naked. Even if I remembered to remove my pajamas before, I forgot to put my clothes on after. Since I had my headphones I didn't see anyone having weird looks at me or trying to talk to me. That's when I arrived a little late in the classroom (I was finishing my song) that I removed my headset and saw that I, indeed, went to school naked. That day we had another temporary teacher since the right one had a car accident and went to jail. He wasn't used to our school yet and asked me : "why are you naked ?? Go immediately and put some clothes on !!!". The bad part was I just went from my house to the school (15 min) and I was very tired from all the walking so I responded "But teacher, I can't I'm tired". But he persisted on being annoying so I hit myself and blackmailed him to tell the cops that he committed a horrible crime against me. Good thing he was smart and let me through the day. Tomorrow, he unexpectedly was fired (such a bad teacher) and I got the whole day to play.
My boyfriend keeps making gaming references during sex
NSFW* I (F22) am confused with how my boyfriend(M22) reacts when we have sex, when I get home from work he is usually on his computer and talking with his friends. I don’t mind that he usually plays video games with his friends because we both work and we both spend time together but the problems come in when we have sex. When I offered him sex he yelled “I agree!” Which I usually hear him say when he is saying yes to his friends over a call. Fast forward a bit and he yells at me to “attack the D point” and when he asks for head he points and says “Attention to the map” again, he says this while playing in his computer. When we finish he ends off by saying “Well done” or “Excellent” in an almost sarcastic like voice. It makes me uncomfortable but I don’t feel like getting mad over simple phrases and I don’t know how I should address this with him. Thoughts?
I'm not attracted to my girlfriends body.
For context, I (15M) met my girlfriend (16F) a few months ago. She was attractive and I think we instantly clicked, our personalities went great with each other.
I saw her body yesterday for the first time and I didn't feel any attraction to it. I had to force myself to pretend to be amazed for her sake but I really wasn't at all.
Any advice for what I should do? She is so great but yesterday really threw me off.
Edit: She isn't even fat or anything, I just didn't feel anything when I saw her like that. I find her face extremely attractive
Also, I haven't watched porn for about a year. Don't think it has skewed my perception
Edit 2: it's not an online relationship. We originally met in person and I saw her last night in person
Edit 3: I feel that I can't just break up. It'd feel like something was missing, idk. I am very attracted to her personality, she's a great girl but I just wasn't physically attracted to what I saw yesterday and it felt unnatural trying to force myself to feel good about it
I honestly feel pretty depressed about the whole situation because I really dont want to hurt her feelings, she doesn't deserve any of this but at the same time I don't want to be keeping secrets from her
Edit 4: guys, I'm not gay
Edit 5: for some clarification, when I say seen her body for the first time, I mean naked. I've seen her before with clothes on but this is the first time I've seen her without them.
Edit 6: I'm going to sleep it's 1:24 in the morning, why tf did I stay up this long
Edit 7: wtf I just woke up and I got hundreds of replies
Edit 8: update: we just talked a bit and I still feel sexual attraction to her, so I'm really confused cause it's there but when I see her body it isn't. Haven't told her anything yet but I think she knows something is off.
Idk how she could not be my type cause she literally checks all the boxes I want
Is it normal to suck on your girlfriends nipples to fall asleep?
Wasn't sure where to post this, so I hope here is fine.
My girlfriend asked me out of nowhere why I never suck on her nipples to fall asleep. I was confused and told her that I'm not an infant any more and I don't really need that to fall asleep. She told me that this is something her ex-boyfriend used to always do which I personally find very weird. I told her that this doesn't sound like normal behaviour to me but she felt like I was just being defensive and refuse to be vulnerable and 'less masculine'.
Which is why I just wanted to know if this behaviour is in fact 'normal' or at least common.
I was sitting an exam like an hour ago and this guy walks in with tight jeans and an absolute dump truck of a man-ass.
Honestly the dude was jiggly and cakey and it fr made me stare. He caught me staring at him and came up to me to ask me why I was staring at him.
Thankfully, he didn't know I was looking at his ass. He was one of those macho men who thought I was stirring up trouble.
Now, I could have de-escalated the situation by simply saying that I got lost in thought or sth.
Nope. I had to pull a certified Wordington moment. I said without even thinking about it "nah man you just double checked up".
He looks at me weird and says nothing, just makes a confused face.
I say then "you got a thug shaker homie"
Then, in the worst English I have ever heard he says "I do not England".
Mf couldn't speak English (makes sense, few people can where I'm from), so NOW after I realized my blunder, I get a chance to redemption. I can play it off as me being normal!
HA! NOPE!
I change to my native tongue and say "you have a fat ass".
And he punched me.
Fuck you guys you ruined my brain with your gay ah ah posts.
