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Chef Boyardee beefaroni

    Chef Boyardee beefaroni. One summer, because I was hella bored, I bought some chef Boyardee beefaroni and put it in my friend's mailbox as a prank. He didn't find it but his parents did, and they asked their neighbors who did it. He suspected me at first, but I managed to get him off of my tail. Now our neighborhoods were fairly close to eachother, so I could be over there in a 50 minute walk. Every night, I walked up to their neighborhood (walking anywhere at 2:am is creepy as hell but the Boyardee bandit does not stop for demons) and put a can of beefaroni inside their mailbox. After about a month, they call the police to find out who's putting beefaroni in their mailbox. Luckily the police really didn't care that much and just told them to get a camera which they eventually did. Meanwhile my friend is telling me all of this from his perspective, right, so I usually know what they do before I strike. So I start covering my face, and pretend to hunch over. I have no idea where this camera is, so I can never be too careful. They call the cops again and give them a profile, and now the cops are looking for a crippled beefaroni bandit. After a solid 3 months of this shit, one of the baggers at the store gets word somehow, and starts getting suspicious because he sees me buying tons of beefaroni. He confronts me, I tell him the truth, and I shit you not he starts helping me beefaroni my friend's house. We're putting it all over hiding it in the lawns, porch, fence, you name it. Halloween rolls around, and I dress up as chef Boyardee. I go to my friends house and say "your daily subscription to Chef Boyardee beefaroni has ended. Would you like to renew?". I hear laughter in the background, and it's the store clerk. Turns out he recently started dating best friend's sister, and that's how he heard. Truth be told, I don't think I've ever been punched harder than when my friend found out. Good times. We still laugh about it from time to time.
    
    TLDR. Bought and hid chef Boyardee beefaroni for nearly half a year around my best friend's house. The Beefaroni bandit strikes again! 

    I’m sorry, but as an AI language model I cannot fulfill your request

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      4chan IHOP pancake copypasta

        "Can I have the fruit pancakes please?"
        >"The what? There's nothing on the menu called "fruit pancakes". "Th-the fresh fruit pancakes." >"Huh..."
        "Th-this one..." [points to menu] 
        >"Say it."
        "What?"
        >"Say. It."
        "I'd like a... r-....rooty t-tooty...."
        >"Say it like you mean it."
        [starting to cry] "I-I want a r-r-rooty t-tooty f-f-....f- fresh n... n fruity...."
        
        Why do dining establishments like to humiliate their customers like this?

        PBS created the show Arthur to sell Marc Brown’s books

          Because of the repeal, PBS created the show Arthur to sell Marc Brown’s books, which led to the creation of Arthur Season 4 Ep 1B “Arthur’s Big Hit” wherein the main character Arthur punches his sister DW. This episode inspired my emotionally stunted father to abuse my siblings and myself. The effects from the abuse by my father linger to this day, so yes Ronald Reagan ruined my life. 

          I am so lonely. All the other Steam users are scared of me. No one talks to me.

            Its the Conquest monologue from the Invincible (TV series) but changed to a Steam user and copy pasted on Steam profile as a joke.

            I am so lonely. All the other Steam users are scared of me. No one talks to me. No one wants to accept my friend requests, they think I am a chud. They send me from sale to sale, buying anything in the name of my owned games badge. And as I get more of them, they loathe me more and more. I am a victim of my own greed. Steamhappy. I don't even get a reward, only a reaction emoji. I am capable of so much more, and no one sees it. Some days, I feel so alone I could shower, but I don't. I never do. Because what would be the point? Not a single person in the entire Steam community would be able to smell me. Take it to your profile.

            Real Goth

              Someone remade the iconic real emo copypasta into goths.

              "Real Goth" only consists of the British post-punk scene and the late 70s/80s Goth rock scene. What is known by "second wave goth" is nothing but Alternative Rock with questionable real goth influence. When people try to argue that bands like Marilyn Manson are not real goth, while saying that She Wants Revenge or London After Midnight is, I can't help not to cringe because they are just as fake goth as Marilyn Manson (plus the pretentiousness). Real goth sounds ENERGETIC, POWERFUL and somewhat HATEFUL. Fake goth is weak, self pity and a failed attempt to direct energy and emotion into music. Some examples of REAL GOTH are Bauhaus, The Sisters of Mercy, Christian Death (the only real goth band from the non-British goth scene) and Siouxsie and the Banshees. Some examples of FAKE GOTH are The Faint, Type O Negative and Scary Bitches GOTH BELONGS TO POST-PUNK NOT TO INDUSTRIAL, METAL, ALT ROCK OR ANY OTHER MAINSTREAM GENRE
              Gothic rock isn't fucking real. There's no such thing. Bauhaus is just bargain bin Joy Division and Joy Division was a post-punk act. The Cure is just edgy synth pop. Siouxsie and the Banshees are just new wave. Sisters of Mercy are just hard rock. Even the bands that embrace the genre aren’t Goth. The Mission is a Sisters of Mercy rip-off, which as I’ve said previously, is just hard rock. Fields of the Nephilim aren’t even rock or post-punk, they’re death metal. “Goth fashion" was already a thing when the "subculture" came into being. It just wasn't called goth. It was called DRESSING LIKE SHIT!!!! Goth is a fanciful delusion of Gen X LOSERS and I'm tired of pretending it's not.