Here is how Capitalism is comparable to My Wife Leaving Me
First of all, my wife is gone (I miss her very much). Similarly in Captalism the “Surplus Value” of the “Workers” is gone (Marx Reference). Additionally we see a very bureaucratic system with middle management jobs that don’t really need to be done in Captliksm, likewise I had to spend my Monday signing “Divorce Paper” instead of going fishing with the guys. Finally, in capitulatistic society every person is atomized (“Osmosis Jones” Reference) and part of a larger ‘spectacle’ as Debord observes . On the other hand my wife made quite a “spectacle” of herself when she screamed at me for two hours about perceived failings in our relationship. (I thought it was fine)
Hopefully we can one day start a “Revolution” to defeat this oppressive system. I have personally arranged an “Anti-Capitalist Fishing Trip” with the guys in which each fish we catch will be equally shared.
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female brawler breeding, Willow is the most compatible Brawler for humans? Not only are they in the thrower group, which is mostly comprised of idiots, Willow is an average of 5’03” tall and 89 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Stats for HP and access to shield gear, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Willow would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the star powers obsession and love is blind, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their Gadgets Dive and Spellbound, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Brawler comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Willow turn white. Willow is literally built for human dick. Ungodly Acid attacks, Gadgets+Star Powers, means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more
I own an M1 Abrams for base defense, just as the Founding Fathers intended!
4 T-90s break into my hangar.
I yell “What the devil?!” As I grab my composite helmet and an M829A1 round.
I blow a golf ball sized hole in the first T-90, they explode on the spot.
I fire HEAT-FS at the second T-90, and it misses because the T-90 dodged and nails the Warrior IFV next door.
I load an experimental APFSDS round and yell “Tally Ho, lads!” It over-penetrates the first T-90 and destroys the other right behind it, the sound and shrapnel sound off base alarms.
I fix the engineering dozer and charge the last terrified T-90, flipping it into a ditch. The tank runs out of gas while waiting for the MPs to arrive because the crew’s shock is impossible to treat.
Just as the Founding Fathers intended.
Its from a 4chan post describing Joe Rogan’s podcast during the height of his popularity. The copypasta is often use as an ironic joke whenever Joe makes a bad take.
Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan from the steppes that took an interest in intellectual things and his podcast is basically him bringing slightly nervous scholars and magicians to come before him to explain how the world works “glasses man, you explain to Joe why sky big, and how tree grow” but he will also believe almost anything you tell him, and only recently (in the past few years) does he clap back like “Tiny hat man say otherwise, do you lie to Joe? tiny hat man safe fat not bad for you, that sugar is enemy, so which is truth? Joe thinks you are wrong” and people just nervously go “oh-oh ok h-Haha yeah i guess so”
“Joe spend many moons on horseback and training with bow and arrow, but Joe also wonder why skyfire rise from mountains every morning, you will explain this to Joe”
Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan from the steppes that took an interest in intellectual things and his show is basically him bringing slightly nervous scholars and magicians to come before him to explain how the world works “glasses man, you explain to Joe why sky big, and how tree grow” but he will also believe almost anything you tell him, and only recently (in the past few years) does he clap back like “Tiny hat man say otherwise, do you lie to Joe? Tiny hat man say fat not bad for you, that sugar is enemy, so which is truth? Joe thinks you are wrong” and people just nervously go “oh-oh ok h-Haha yah I guess so” “Joe spend many moons on horseback and training with bow and sword, but joe also wonder why skyfire rise from mountains every morning, you will explain this to Joe.”
The Lavos aka “Unfortunate doesn’t begin to describe my series…” copypasta is an iconic meme within the competitive Pokemon “Smogon” community. It originated from a pro player ‘Lavos’ ragequit post on the Smogon forum after a series of unlucky events during a game.
After the lost, it sparked the greatest ragequit of all time stemming from his attitude towards the game and its community. The original Lavos forum post and full context leading up to the iconic moment are often celebrated by the Smogon community.
"Unfortunate" doesn't begin to describe my series, this game rewards blind luck and nothing else, I am beyond convinced at this point. After getting completely tooled by scheduling with my opponent changing times on me last minute and refusing to provide confirmation prior to the day of the match as to play times, losing this way somehow felt even worse than I had thought possible. My preparation was superior, my play was superior, and I lost, so I don't see a reason to continue engaging in an activity where what is within my control is overwhelmingly outweighed by what is not.
I am done with competitive Pokemon, and you won't get a fond farewell. This community is infected to its roots with a degenerative disease that grows stronger over time but stops short of killing its host. Tournaments used to have a competitive spirit at their heart, this has been transplanted and replaced with an artificial organ that feeds on vitriol and mockery from insecure little boys that heckle by the sidelines and tear each other to shreds over scraps of attention. The environment we fostered has trapped us all like this in a vicious cycle, and escaping it requires acceptance of the harshest reality we all scramble to explain away, that none of the countless straining efforts we put ourselves through here will ever amount to one single shining glimmer of significance. I would make this the end, but World Cup is still ongoing, and I would never leave so many great friends out to dry, so I'll suffer through a few more games for them.
One last thing before I leave you all to react with disdain, ridicule, and self-righteous fervor, before you do everything in your power to minimize my words and thoughts, box them up and shove them to some cobwebbed corner of your memory, and hope they disappear forever as a stain on your finite time ground to dust. From this moment on, nothing you say matters to me. The foulest insults you hurl with intent to wound will calmly settle at the earth before my feet, and the venom you spit will bring all the pain of a warm summer breeze. You are less than anything you can conceive, while I carry on, brimming with joy distilled from detachment.
Lavos in-game chat before the ragequit
i fucking had you
i had you
thunderpunch rachi guaranteed ohko
this was the single biggest threat to my fucking team
i played around it to the best of my ability
and this bullshit
after rby too
enjoy your fucking trophy dude, i quit.
Lavos forfeited.
Lavos good ending
"Outplayed" doesn't begin to describe my series, this game rewards pure skill and nothing else, I am beyond convinced at this point. After getting completely blessed by scheduling with my opponent sticking to the planned time and agreeing to provide confirmation prior to the day of the match as to play times, losing this way somehow felt even better than I had thought possible. My opponent's preparation was superior, my opponent's play was superior, and he won, so I don't see a reason to stop engaging in an activity where what is not within my control is overwhelmingly outweighed by what is.
I am continuing with competitive Pokemon, and you won't get any kind of farewell. This community is flourishing to its roots with a purifying health that grows stronger over time and persists in bolstering its host. Tournaments have a competitive spirit at their heart, this has been cultivated and sustained by a natural organ that feeds on admiration and respect from confident mature men that cheer by the sidelines and bond with each other over appreciation of their shared hobby. The environment we fostered has welcomed us all like this into a gentle camaraderie, and joining it encourages acceptance of the sweetest reality we all blissfully cherish, that all of the countless straining efforts we put ourselves through here will always amount to endless radiant blazes of significance. I won't make this the end, and World Cup is still ongoing, and I would never leave so many great friends out to dry, so I'll enjoy many more games for them.
One last thing before I leave you all to react with approval, praise, and humble satisfaction, before you do everything in your power to enhance my words and thoughts, frame them and display them on some polished trophy stand of your memory, and hope they last forever as a centerpiece of your finite time raised to prominence. From this moment on, everything you say matters to me. The kindest compliments you extend with intent to uplift will energetically propel themselves to the forefront of my mind, and the support you express will bring all the comfort of a warm summer breeze. You are more than anything you can conceive, while I carry on, brimming with joy distilled from affection.
Its the Pencil Skirt copypasta that started from Tiktok and is often spammed in the comment section as a joke.
HELP I-😭 I DECIDED TO WEAR A PENCIL SKIRT IN SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED "WOW HOURGLASS!" AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF. (I have a mommy voice) AND THEY ALL HAD NOSEBLEEDS😭
Off topic but I remember these boys kept spying on me (I was wearing a tight maxi dress) and when I started talking (I have a mommy voice lol) there noses started bleeding and they called me mommy </3
Spanish version
AYUDA- 😭 DECIDÍ PONERME UNA FALDA LÁPIZ EN LA ESCUELA Y LOS NIÑOS GRITARON "WOW RELOJ DE ARENA!" Y ME PRESENTÉ. (Tengo mommy voice) Y A TODOS LE SANGRARON LA NARIZ
CHRISTIAN VEIL
HELP I-😭 I DECIDED TO WEAR A CHRISTIAN VEIL IN SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED “WOW CHRISTIAN” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF. (I spread the gospel) AND THEY ALL PRAISED JESUS WITH ME
SKIBIDI TOILET
HELP I- 😭I DECIDED TO WEAR A SKIBIDI TOILET TO SCHOOL AND THE TOILETS YELLED “WOW SKIBIDI!” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF (I HAVE A SKIBIDI VOICE) AND THEY ALL SANG SKIBIDI TOILET WITH ME.
“WOW RHOMBUS”
HELP -I 😭 I WORE A PENCIL SKIRT TO SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED “WOW RHOMBUS” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF (I sould like a dying otter) AND THEY ALL HAD EARBLEEDS