I just wanna say how fucking cool it is that these pro players have stats like video game characters. Like Donk has 100/100 in firepower and Apex has like 95/100 in utility. It's just so cool to me. Like imagine we get to choose as being donk as like a character where our AK47 has a tighter spray and does more damage. Or apex gets to hold 2 more utility items of his choosing. It's just so fascinating to me, I'm really grateful for whoever is taking notes of these stats for us to see. It's just so intriguing I don't really know what to say. Maybe someone can understand how I feel because seeing these players stats just makes me feel giddy and like a kid again, like seeing video game characters stats on the character select screen and just reasoning with myself on why they have such stats.
Sorry, this is my first time being into the competitive scene of anything and it truly is like video game characters. Like donk has the special ability of the donk slide or Xantares has his xantares peak, karrigan has bullshit powerup, etc.
Like Donk has 100/100 firepower and Apex has like 95/100 utility. Imagine being able to choose playing as Xertion where you can’t call and your AK shoots sideways
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar.
The first mathematician orders a beer.
The second orders half a beer.
"I don't serve half-beers" the bartender replies.
"Excuse me?" Asks mathematician #2.
"What kind of bar serves half-beers?" The bartender remarks. "That's ridiculous."
"Oh c'mon" says mathematician #1 "do you know how hard it is to collect an infinite number of us? Just play along".
"There are very strict laws on how I can serve drinks. I couldn't serve you half a beer even if I wanted to."
"But that's not a problem" mathematician #3 chimes in "at the end of the joke you serve us a whole number of beers. You see, when you take the sum of a continuously halving function-"
"I know how limits work" interjects the bartender.
"Oh, alright then. I didn't want to assume a bartender would be familiar with such advanced mathematics".
"Are you kidding me?" The bartender replies, "you learn limits in like, 9th grade! What kind of mathematician thinks limits are advanced mathematics?"
"HE'S ON TO US" mathematician #1 screeches
Simultaneously, every mathematician opens their mouth and out pours a cloud of multicolored mosquitoes. Each mathematician is bellowing insects of a different shade.
The mosquitoes form into a singular, polychromatic swarm. "FOOLS" it booms in unison, "I WILL INFECT EVERY BEING ON THIS PATHETIC PLANET WITH MALARIA"
The bartender stands fearless against the technicolor hoard. "But wait" he inturrupts, thinking fast, "if you do that, politicians will use the catastrophe as an excuse to implement free healthcare. Think of how much that will hurt the taxpayers!"
The mosquitoes fall silent for a brief moment. "My God, you're right. We didn't think about the economy! Very well, we will not attack this dimension. FOR THE TAXPAYERS!" and with that, they vanish.
A nearby barfly stumbles over to the bartender. "How did you know that that would work?"
"It's simple really" the bartender says. "I saw that the vectors formed a gradient, and therefore must be conservative."
Its from a Youtube video of Lasse Lund, a 33-year-old Norwegian man who went viral for claiming his parents abandoned him in the Mumbai slums when he was 10 years old.
I was lost between borders. Norwegian citizen born in Norway, stucked in India living on the streets. Surviving. Being a tourist guide.
Smoking on the fucking roads. Don't you think I wanna get some kind of injustment against the government when Im 33 years old have 0 schooling they haven't done the shit that they were supposed to do. The Finnish embassy when they helped me out of the country, they were supposed to report me to children services because I was under 18. Did they do their job? No they didn't do their job. Thanks to them I dont have fucking nothing. I even told the Norwegian government once that I came back to Norway. I have no school then they should've fucking done some kind of research.
Find out, why don't I have school? What's the reason? No fucking European atleast from a fucking one of the richest countries in the world. Dont have fucking schooling there must be a reason to it. Why they don't do their fucking background check? Because they know theyre in the wrong.
I’ve come to make an announcement: Avatar Aang is a bitch ass motherfucker, he took out my fucking ships! That’s right, he took out his fucking glider staff, and he blew up my ships! So I’m making a callout in the motherfucking oasis: Aang you’ve got a weak element, it’s like the strength of this breeze except way weaker! And here’s what my element looks like: FWOOSH! That’s right, baby! All heat! No source! No gusts! Look at that it’s like two sparks and a flame! Aang took out my ships so guess what I’m gonna do?! I’m taking out the water tribe! That’s right this is what you get: MY SUPER FIREBENDING!
Except I’m not bending at the water tribe, I’m going even higher. I’m bending AT THE MOOOON! How do you like that, ARNOOK?! I’M BENDING AT THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!!
You have approximately 24 seconds until you BEN-DING goes away, now get the fuck out of my sight before I firebend on you too!
I've come to make an announcement:
The Avatar is a b**ch-a$s motherf**ker, he pissed on my f**king dad. That's right, he took his Avatar glowy d**k out and he pissed on my f**king dad, and he said his d**k was "THIS BIG," and I said "that's disgusting," so I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Avatar, you've got a small d**k. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like.
*Equalist airship floats into view above the skyline*
That's right, baby. All points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He f**ked my dad, so guess what, I'm gonna f**k Republic City. That's right, this is what you get: MY SUPER LASER PISS!! *airship fires a big lightning/laserbeam* Except I'm not gonna piss on Republic City, I'm gonna go higher; I'M PISSING ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!
You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROP-O-LETS hit the f**king Earth Kingdom, now get outta my f**king sight, before I piss on you too!"
YESS LADIES!! 🥰🙌🏾🙌🏾 This Is What We Want To See Facebook Mamas, Look at This! These Phenomenal Black Young Ladies Setting The Standard 👏👏🔥🔥❤️. The Lord Is With These Girlies! 💓💝🙏🏾😊😍 . #Amen #WAP #GirlTime #Sleepover #BlackYoungandProud My nieces! Auntie Dalia loves y’all!! #WAP #BlackPower #GoGirls@✝️Now HOLD ONNNN 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 these MY babies right here!! Smart, beautiful AND got rhythm?? GOD DID IT 😭💖🙌🏽 Y’all better use this gift for the Lord on Youth Sunday too!! Don’t play with them gifts God blessed y’all with 😩✨ Auntie over here CRYING watching this with my church robe on and my caramel iced coffee 😭☕️💃🏽 Somebody PLEASE tag Pastor Williams and Sister Cynthia because these babies need to be front and center at praise dance next Sunday!! 👏🏽💜💒 #BlackGirlMagic #BlessedAndHighlyFavored #YouthSundayReady #GodDid #JesusIsTheReason #QueensInTheMaking #CoveredByTheBlood #WalkingInPurpose #ChurchKids #PraiseHim #CantNobodyTellMeNothing 😭🙌🏽💖✨HOLD ON GIRL 💋- YOU ARE A PHENOMENAL 💪BLACK WOMAN ✊! AND YOURE WALKING WITH GRACE 😍✨ AND HONESTLY - THATS A PHENOMENAL WOMAN💜💞! 𝘽-Brave ✊ 𝙇-Lavish 😍 𝘼-Awesome ✨ 𝘾-Cheerfull 🔥 𝙆-Kween 💋IM A PHENOMENAL BLACK WOMAN 😤✊🏾‼️BUILT FROM THE BEST ✝️🙏‼️WALK WITH GRACE 🚶🏾♀️✝️‼️MOVE WITH FINESSE 💜‼️DRIP LIKE DIAMONDS 💎💦‼️SHINE LIKE GOLD ⭐️✨‼️IF YOU DIDN’T KNOW 😝🧐‼️BABY NOW YOU KNOW 😜🫶🏾‼️WE LOVE GOD OVER HERE 🤏🏾‼️‼️‼️‼️
YESS LADIES!! 🥰🙌🏾🙌🏾 This Is What We Want To See Facebook Mamas, Look at This! These Phenomenal Black Young Ladies Setting The Standard 👏👏🔥🔥❤️. The Lord Is With These Girlies! 💓💝🙏🏾😊😍 . #Amen #WAP #GirlTime #Sleepover #BlackYoungandProud My nieces! Auntie Dalia loves y’all!! #WAP #BlackPower #GoGirls@✝️:Now HOLD ONNNN 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 these MY babies right here!! Smart, beautiful AND got rhythm?? GOD DID IT 😭💖🙌🏽 Y’all better use this gift for the Lord on Youth Sunday too!! Don’t play with them gifts God blessed y’all with 😩✨ Auntie over here CRYING watching this with my church robe on and my caramel iced coffee 😭☕️💃🏽 Somebody PLEASE tag Pastor Williams and Sister Cynthia because these babies need to be front and center at praise dance next Sunday!! 👏🏽💜💒 #BlackGirlMagic #BlessedAndHighlyFavored #YouthSundayReady #GodDid #JesusIsTheReason #QueensInTheMaking #CoveredByTheBlood #WalkingInPurpose #ChurchKids #PraiseHim #CantNobodyTellMeNothing 😭🙌🏽💖✨HOLD ON GIRL 💋- YOU ARE A PHENOMENAL 💪BLACK WOMAN ✊! AND YOURE WALKING WITH GRACE 😍✨ AND HONESTLY - THATS A PHENOMENAL WOMAN💜💞! 𝘽-Brave ✊ 𝙇-Lavish 😍 𝘼-Awesome ✨ 𝘾-Cheerfull 🔥 𝙆-Kween 💋IM A PHENOMENAL BLACK WOMAN 😤✊🏾‼️BUILT FROM THE BEST ✝️🙏‼️WALK WITH GRACE 🚶🏾♀️✝️‼️MOVE WITH FINESSE 💜‼️DRIP LIKE DIAMONDS 💎💦‼️SHINE LIKE GOLD ⭐️✨‼️IF YOU DIDN’T KNOW 😝🧐‼️BABY NOW YOU KNOW 😜🫶🏾‼️YESS LADIES!! 🥰🙌🏾🙌🏾 This Is What We Want To See Facebook Mamas, Look at This! These Phenomenal Black Young Ladies Setting The Standard 👏👏🔥🔥❤️. The Lord Is With These Girlies! 💓💝🙏🏾😊😍 . #Amen #WAP #GirlTime #Sleepover #BlackYoungandProud My nieces! Auntie Dalia loves y’all!! #WAP #BlackPower #GoGirls@✝️:Now HOLD ONNNN 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 these MY babies right here!! Smart, beautiful AND got rhythm?? GOD DID IT 😭💖🙌🏽 Y’all better use this gift for the Lord on Youth Sunday too!! Don’t play with them gifts God blessed y’all with 😩✨ Auntie over here CRYING watching this with my church robe on and my caramel iced coffee 😭☕️💃🏽 Somebody PLEASE tag Pastor Williams and Sister Cynthia because these babies need to be front and center at praise dance next Sunday!! 👏🏽💜💒 #BlackGirlMagi
YESS LADIES!! 🥰🙌🏾🙌🏾 This Is What We Want To See Facebook Mamas, Look at This! These Phenomenal Black Young Ladies Setting The Standard 👏👏🔥🔥❤️. The Lord Is With These Girlies! 💓💝🙏🏾😊😍 . #Amen #WAP #GirlTime #Sleepover #BlackYoungandProud My nieces! Auntie Dalia loves y’all!! #WAP #BlackPower #GoGirls@✝️:Now HOLD ONNNN 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 these MY babies right here!! Smart, beautiful AND got rhythm?? GOD DID IT 😭💖🙌🏽 Y’all better use this gift for the Lord on Youth Sunday too!! Don’t play with them gifts God blessed y’all with 😩✨ Auntie over here CRYING watching this with my church robe on and my caramel iced coffee 😭☕️💃🏽 Somebody PLEASE tag Pastor Williams and Sister Cynthia because these babies need to be front and center at praise dance next Sunday!! 👏🏽💜💒 #BlackGirlMagic #BlessedAndHighlyFavored #YouthSundayReady #GodDid #JesusIsTheReason #QueensInTheMaking #CoveredByTheBlood #WalkingInPurpose #ChurchKids #PraiseHim #CantNobodyTellMeNothing 😭🙌🏽💖✨HOLD ON GIRL 💋- YOU ARE A PHENOMENAL 💪BLACK WOMAN ✊! AND YOURE WALKING WITH GRACE 😍✨ AND HONESTLY - THATS A PHENOMENAL WOMAN💜💞!
𝘽-Brave ✊
𝙇-Lavish 😍
𝘼-Awesome ✨
𝘾-Cheerfull 🔥
𝙆-Kween 💋IM A PHENOMENAL BLACK WOMAN 😤✊🏾‼️BUILT FROM THE BEST ✝️🙏‼️WALK WITH GRACE 🚶🏾♀️✝️‼️MOVE WITH FINESSE 💜‼️DRIP LIKE DIAMONDS 💎💦‼️SHINE LIKE GOLD ⭐️✨‼️IF YOU DIDN’T KNOW 😝🧐‼️BABY NOW YOU KNOW 😜🫶🏾‼️YESS LADIES!! 🥰🙌🏾🙌🏾 This Is What We Want To See Facebook Mamas, Look at This! These Phenomenal Black Young Ladies Setting The Standard 👏👏🔥🔥❤️. The Lord Is With These Girlies! 💓💝🙏🏾😊😍 . #Amen #WAP #GirlTime #Sleepover #BlackYoungandProud My nieces! Auntie Dalia loves y’all!! #WAP #BlackPower #GoGirls Now HOLD ONNNN 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 these MY babies right here!! Smart, beautiful AND got rhythm?? GOD DID IT 😭💖🙌🏽 Y’all better use this gift for the Lord on Youth Sunday too!! Don’t play with them gifts God blessed y’all with 😩✨ Auntie over here CRYING watching this with my church robe on and my caramel iced coffee 😭☕️💃🏽 Somebody PLEASE tag Pastor Williams and Sister Cynthia because these babies need to be front and center at praise dance next Sunday!! 👏🏽💜💒
