Happy Spanksgiving emojipasta
âŒïžAYOâŒïžu Thanksgiving đ
đthroat goatđœđ Grab a đdrumstickđ this autumn and get ready to đđFALLđđ to your knees and đâsuck the meat offđšđ like the turkey's name was đ«žđđ«·Big Beautiful Billđ. đ«”That's rightđ, we're not eating like đ«đkingsđ«đ this year we're eating like đșđžpresidentsđșđž. So smear ur face đđ„§pumpkin pie orange đ đ€Ą, slop up that whipped đąđ©Clinton creamđ«ĄđŠ, and DON'T forget to play with the cranberriesđđcuz it's gonna get saucy 2nite, đđLewinsky styleđŠđ. Send this to 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ of your đđhorniestđđ€Ș cornucopia cumslutsđŠđ or ol' Bubba's đ«Ąđ gonna grab YOU by the đpussyđand split you like a turkey âšđ”wishboneâ ïžâš. If you get 0ïžâŁ replies back ur a little FREAKsgiving fascistđĄ and ur getting sentđđto horny jailđŁđ. Only get 5ïžâŁ back and ur a real đïžđđïžCapitol cuckđ°đïž. But get đ back and u can take the oath of đđ§ââïžORIFICEđŠđ for a third termđ„Žđ€. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
This SKANKSGIVING đŠđœđ«Šwere getting STUFFED with COCKđđđ, get ready to GOBBLE đđdown some WHITE meatđŠđŠđŠđŠ, STUFF that PUSSYđŒđŒđŒ with DARK meatđđđ, and spread those TURKEY đđđ«đčlegs đŠ”đŒđŠ”đŒđŠ”đŒand get ready to be THANKFULđđđ for DADDYS đšđ»loads of gravyđŠđŠ, CUM-kin pie đ„§đ€«đ€with extra CREAMđ€©đđŻ, and remember the sexy đsettler đąđ§đŒâđŸslutsđ
that BENT OVER đđ
đŒat PLYMOUTH COCK đȘšđżđto take a CORNUCOPIA of native đłđœââïžđłđœââïžđgibletsđđđ! send this to ten pussyđ đœpounding đđŒđđŒpilgrims đ§đŒâđŸđ©đœâđŸand get that potat-HOLEđ„đ©đłïž MASHED. Get 5ïžâŁ back and get your drum STICK đsucked dryđ”đđ«. Get đ back and get your ASSEROLE MAY-DEFLOWERedđ„đ„â”ïž
Guess what đŻâitâs that time â° of year đ to gobble đŠ gobble đŠ gobble đŠ up âŹïž those dicks đ chicks đ„ and bicks đ€š (big dicks) đđ«đ«đ«đ« I bet đ youâre all đ€đ€đ€ HORNY-copia đœ đ„đ„đ¶đâïžđđđ for SKANKS-giving đ€Șđđ€€đ€€đđđ youâll be saying đŹ thanks đ for giving me all đ« this đ« COCK đ„łđ„łđ„łđ„ł send this to đ of your thiccest sluts with those hot đ„” hot đ„ tasty đ€€đ peach pies đ„§ đ đđ if you know đ€ what I mean âșïžđđ if you get 1ïžâŁ back đđ€ŹđĄ then you and that slut đ€€đ€€đ€€đ«đ«đ« have to appropriate Native American culture together đđȘ¶đ if you get 3ïžâŁ back đđ€ youâre going to get your turkey đŠ eaten đđđđđ tomorrow night đ±đ±đ±đ± if you get 5ïžâŁ back đđ you will be eating your cousinâs đ¶đ» peach đ pie đ„§ just like youâve always đŻđŻđŻwanted đđ€€đ„” if you get 7ïžâŁ back đ¶ youâll become đČđČ a pilgrim đ©đ and be the villain đŠčââïž of American đșđž history đđđ đđđ if you get all 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ back đ€Żđ±đ€Żđ±đ€Żđ±đ€Ż youâll be feasting đ€€đ this thanksgiving đđ in more ways than one đ«đđđŒđ okay you sexy đ sexy đ gobbling turkey poos đŠđŠđŠ itâs time â° for me to go âĄïž atone đ€Łfor the sins âïž đof my ancestorsđđđđ©đŒââ€ïžâđâđšđŒđ€°đŒđ€±đŒđ©âđ§đ€Șđ€Șđ€Șđ€Șđ€Ș
âŒïžITSđ SPANKSGIVING đ BITCHESâŒïžOn this day đ many years ago đź the SLUTTY đ PILGRIMS đ© sailed â”ïž across the ASSlantic đ HOEcean in a quest đto find đ more đ COCKS đ to SUCK! đ
Together with the đ NAUGHTY đ NATIVES đč, they gathered đ« around the dinner table đœ and had đ our nationâs very 1ïžâŁst GANG BANG! đŻââïžđŻđŻââïž We honor đđ» their ORGY đź every year đ by giving THANKS đđŒ to all đ„° thatâs important â€ïž to us: Family đšâđ©âđ§âđŠ, Friends đŹ, Freedom đșđž, and DICK! đđœđ
So grab your BUNS, đâđđsqueeze those BREASTS, đđ„đ€Č and shove a cornaCOPIOUS đœđœ amount of DICK đ đ© into that hungry đź hungry HOLE! đłđđ
Ladies đŻââïž, just like your đŠ THOTSgiving đŠ turkey, itâs time â° to throw your legs đ€žđŒââïžin the air đ€žđŒââïžand prepare to get âĄïž STUFFED đ!
After dinner,đŽitâs time đź for CUMPKIN PIE!! đ„§ Show Daddy đšđœâ𩳠how đđŒ thankful đđŒ you are and LICKK đ his WishBONE 𩮠until he gets as HARD đas PlyMOUTH rock â° and shoots đŠ his HOMEADE GRAVY đ„Ł! đ
Midnight đ starts đ BLACK âŹïž FRIDAY đ so send đ€ this to đ THOTS đđ»ââïžyou are thankful đđŒ for! If you get 0ïžâŁ back, sail đ to England đđ»đ€ź If you get 5ïžâŁ back, youâll be getting your corn đœ CREAMED đđ„°. Get đ back or more, and the đ BIGGEST, đ GIRTHIEST, BLACKâ«ïž FRIDAY đ COCK đ± is CUMMING đŠYOUR WAY AT MIDNIGHT đđđđđđ
HEY đđ€Ł you Turkey Lurkey SLUTâŒïžâŒïžđŠđŻââïžđ Its the last âŹ
ïž THIRST-DAY đŠđ
in Hđ
ŸïžE-VEMBER đđđđ and that means its THđ
ŸïžTSGIVING!!!!đłđŠđŠđđđđŠđđđŽđ
đ€ Todays the day đ u get 2 STUFF đâ©ïžđłđ€€ ur PILGRIM PU$$Y đâŹ
ïžâ”ïžđšâđŸ with CUMpkin Pie đ„§đ Mashed HOEtatoes đ„đš Green Bean Casser-Hole đłđ« Cran Bussy Sauce đđ„«đŠđ€€ and gobble đ
gobble đ
đ
GOBBLE đ
đ
đ
STUFFED TURKEY ASS đŠđ til you B U R S T đœđ„Žđ„đ«đŠ But while ur gettin corn bred đœđđ dont forget đđââïžđ€ what đââïž Spanksgiving đđ is really about đđ Get down đđȘ hold ur old manâs hand đŽđ€ and tell him ur SO THANKFUL đđ„° đđ© for making u the Hungry Little Hoe u are đ„đšâđŠđ„”đŻđđđđ
In the next 6ïžâŁ9ïžâŁ SECONDS đđ SEND THIS đČ to đ of ur NASTIEST FALL FREAKS đ€ȘđđŠđđđœđđ€ If u get đ back đ your a JUICY TURKEY SLORE đđđŠđ€€đŠ Get 5ïžâŁđ back and ur a Bred Roll Bitch đđđ BUT IF U GET 0ïžâŁ BACK your a dry turkey hoeđ”đ€ąđđȘ and u wont get ANY DISCUNTS đžđž on BLACK Cđ
ŸïžCK-DAYâŒïžđ€đđđ°đ°đ”đČđșđ±âïžđ«
HAPPY THOTSGIVING U DIRTY SLUTđŠđŠđŠđŠđŽđ
đ
R U A SEXY LIL PILGRIM?đđ©đ OR A NAKED NATIVE¿¿đčđ”â TURKEY ISNT THE ONLY THING GETTING STUFFED đđ»đđ»đ
đ©đ©đ© MAKE SURE U STUFF THAT đ»PUSSYđđ± RIGHT LIKE A PHAT TURKEYđŠđđAND U SLUTSđđŒđ
đ MAKE SURE TO GIVE THAT đŠ TURKEYđ A GOODđđŒđđŒOLE JERKYâđ» AND GET READY đ€đ TO GIVE đđđ OR RECIEVEđđ« THANKS. đ UR ONE OF MY FAVORITE HOES đđđŠâ€ïž â€ïžIM SO THANKFUL TO HAVE A FILTHY SLUT LIKE U IN MY LIFE đđŠđŠđŠđ đđNOW SEND THIS TO T E N 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ OF UR đđŠ SEXIEST đđ đŠ TURKEY đŠ SLUTS IN THE NEXTđ 1 5 SECONDSđ IF NOT, U GON GAIN 30 POUNDS ON SPANKSGIVING đłđ± đŠđŠđ©đ©đđ IF U GET THREE BACK THEN U REALLY A HOE đđŒđ IF U GET FIVE 5ïžâŁ BACK THEN UR OFFICIALLY đł A đź SEXY STUFFING đđ SLUT đ WHO GON GET STUFFED ON TURKEY DAY WITH DADDYâS SPECIAL RECIPE!đđ»đŠ GET 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK AND UR A MASHED POTATO đ„ HOE đ„” HAPPY COCK đ GOBBLING đ THURSDAY đ
SORRY SLUTSâŒïžđđ COCKTOBERđIS OVERđ
đ»ââïžâïžđ«BUT DON'Tâïž WORRYđđ»ââïžâïžHOEVEMBER HAS ONLY JUST BEGUNđđŒđđ» YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANSđđđ» LOOKS LIKE THE đ TURKEY đ ISNT THE ONLY THING GETTING đ STUFFED đđ TONIGHT đâŒïž PREPAREđ€đ»UR PUSSIESđđ»đđ» FOR SOME CUMKINđŠ PIE đ„§ CAUSE ITS TIMEđ TO GOBBLE GOBBLE đŠđŠ UP THAT SLOW ROASTED đ COCKđ NOW đđ» GIVE THAT TURKEYđ SOME GOOD đđ» OL' JERKY âđŠ AND GIVE (or receive đđ) THANKS FOR THAT GOOD DICK đđ»đ SEND THIS TO 7âŒïž OF YOUR BEST HOESđŻââïžâïž TO LET THEM KNOW YOURE THANKFUL đđ» FOR HOEVEMBER đđ»đđ»
GLAZE MY THIGHS đŠ SLAP MY BUTT đŠ MAKE ME YOUR đŠ TURKEY SLUT đŠ EAT MY BREAST đŠ EAT MY WINGS đŠ JUST DONâT FINISH IN MY STUFFING đŠ DADDYâS DRUMSTICK LOOKS SO YUMMY đŠSHOOT YOUR GRAVY AND FILL MY TUMMY đŠ
HappyđTHICCSGIVINGđđ turkeyđđŠass đŠbitchđ!! Get đreadyđ€tođđcelebrateđđthe hoe-lidayđ
đof being đTHANKFUL đfor DICKđđđđŠđŠ and rememberingđthe pilgrims đđwhen theyđđâ”landed onđđPLYMOUTH COCKđđandđstartedđ„đ
sucking thatđnative AmericanđșđžđœCORNCOBđœand đ© STUFFED đđŠđ© turkey đŠđassđHOESđlike you. SendđŹđthisđtođ„30!đ„of đđŠyour SLUTTIESTđŠgirlsđđ..get đ5đ backđand you'ređđ a turkey đŠthotđđget đ15đ backđđđŠand youređ a trueâïžđŠTHICCSGIVINGđđŠđ hoe. Get đœđ„30đ„đœ backđand you'llđ need someđŠtryctophanđŠđŠ bc you'ređŽgonna be đŽđđsleepingđđ with every guyđšâđŠ±at đđđŠThiccsgivingđŠđđ, đ„đ„đ©bitchđđ„đŠ- Now go đget that littleđđđŠ pumpkinđ„§đ„§ assđ readyđ© tođŠđ be đŠđcreampied!đŠđŠ
Hey there you pilgrim poonplowersđŒđđ»ââïžđ„Žâđ» đ đŠđ€€you Maydeflowerers đšđ»+đą = đ
đ©đœ đŠ” đș đŠ”đ«you Jamestown jerkoffs đ©đđŠđđ
đitâs time to stop bluffingđ€·đ»ââïžand start stuffin her muffinđ„đŠđ§because itâs wanksgiving âđ»âđ»đđŠđŠđŠSo if youâre down to whine and dine in the turkey brineđšđ»+đ©đœ=đđđšđŠđïžđ«Šđïžthen take your match đ„ from hinge đ€€đđand pull out that syringe đ đŠ đŠ đ„§ so she can gobble down đ€ź some baste paste đ đ„ đŠ đŠ đ„ If she wants more sauce đ
đ
đ đ
then make her pussy float đŁââïž đ©ââïž đđ»ââïž by pouring from the man gravy boat đą đ đŠ” đ đŠ” hoepfully thereâs room for dessert đđŒ đ đ° đ so you can go purchasss đŠ đ some goodies on Black Friday đ đŽ đŻ đ and go cherry popping shopping đ đŠ đđ« đ€·đ»ââïž so you can be giving any naughty native đšđ» + đ©đœ =âșïž đ đ€€ đ a pilg rim job đ
đđ€Șbefore she takes the tumultuous Teepee truffle butter đ„đ§ đŠ đđafter a gourd hoard đđŠ đœ đ đ Send this to 10 Squanto suckling sluts đ©đŒâđŠ°đ©đŒâ𩰠đŠ đœ đŠ đ€ so you can get some head without the headdress đ«đđ„Ž đ„ đŠ đ€źwhile you give her a lil sweet potato cream pie đ đŠ +đ = đ€°đ» đ¶đŒ Or else, the only wishbone 𩮠đŠ đđ»ââïž youâll be thankful for is the turkeys đŠđŠđ„đŠđ
đŠđŠđHAPPY đ SPANKSGIVINGđđŠ BITCHESâ€ïžđ Iâm SO thankful đ„°đ to have a FILTHY đ± SLUT đ like you đ«” in my life đ„°â€ïž So whether đ€š youâre a đ PROMISCUOUSđ€€PILGRIMđ§ââïžđ©â”ïž or đ€ a NAUGHTYđNATIVEđŹđââïžââĄïžđœ Get ready to SUCKđ those TURKEYđŠ BREASTSđđ and LICKđ
those THIGHSđđ Flick đđ§ my green BEANđ«đ« and eat đ my SWEETđ« POTATOđ„đ ASSeroleđđđ„”Put your đ«” MACARONIđ in my YAMS đ đ until it gets CHEESYđŠđ„”đ«đ« Send âĄïž THIS to đ HOESâïž your MOST THANKFUL â€ïžâ€ïž for đ Get 0ïžâŁ back and your EGGSđ„ wonât âđââïž get DEVILEDđčđč Get 5ïžâŁ back and you MAYđ§đ€š get deFLOWERed đžđ±đ Get đ back and that TURKEYđŠPUSSYđ±IS GETTING STUFFEDđ„±đ«š WITH CUM-PKIN đ PIEđ„§đ°đŠ
HAPPY SPANXGIVING đ DIRTY TURKEY đčđ· GOBBLERS đđčITS TIME TO GET SLEAZY IN THE KITCHEN âïž GRIP SOME đ„TATERS FIRMLY IN THOSE đSOFT HANDS đđ€AND GIVE EM A đŻNICE SQUEEZE đDONT FORGeT THAT DADDIES SPATCHCOCK đŠ NEEDS TO BE RUBBED đ BASTED AND đ đCOATED FOR HOURSđŠđŠđŠ đ„” GuzZlE THAT GRAVY đ AND MOP THE REST UP đ„șWITH YOUR HOT LITTLE BUNsđ„ LIKE A GOOD đđčPILGRIM SLUT đ„č THE SETTLERSđ¶ TOOK THE NATIVES BY FORCE âșïž SO U SHOULD LET DADDY DO THE SAME đ IN THEIR MEMORY đč SEND this 2 FOUR DOZEN 4ïžâŁ8ïžâŁ OF UR SLUTTIEST YAM đ SOUFLEEđ SWORD đŠ SWALLOWERS đŠ GET đ
Ÿïž BACK AND ITS ALL THANKSGIVING AND NO THANKSGETTING đ„Čđ„Čđ„Č GET 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK AND YOU GET TO LICK DADDIES đ„§ SWEET TREATS đđ©GET 2ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK AND YOULL BE âżïž PLYMOUTH đŻ ROCKED ALL NIGHT (IM TALKING ABOUT SEX) đđ»đđŸ AND ALWAYS REMEMBER TO GIVE âïžâïžTHANKS TO GOD đ
đon thisđ day đïžđïžin 1ïžâŁ4ïžâŁ9ïžâŁ2ïžâŁ Christopher đźâđš Columb-ASS đđđđâïžand đ his SLUTTY đ©đ©đ© PILGRIMS đđđđđđđ landedđ¶ at Plymouth COCK!!! đđđđđđŠđŠđŠđŠđŠđ©đ©đ©đ©đ©đ©they came â”â” from đŹđ§EnglandđŹđ§đđđ in search đđof more đdicks to suck đŠđŠđŠđ©and đ€Șđ€Șđ€Ș holes đłïžđłïžto fuckđđđ€Șđ€Ș. all the đ±NAKEDđ± indiansđźđłđźđłđźđł let đ©the pilgrims đŠ SLOBBER đ€€đ€€đ€€ ALL OVER THEIR đœđœđœđœđœđœ CORNCOBSđœđœđœđœđœđœ. at the first americanđșđžđșđž ORGYđ§âđ€âđ§đđŹđ« the indiansđźđł brought the đ„©đ„Šđ„„đ„§đđ„šđ„Șđ„ foodđđđđ€đ đ and the đ„șđ„ș pilgrims đ€Ș brought âïžsalvationâïžđđđ and PRIVATE PART đđđȘPROPERTY đ€Ąđđ€Ąđđ€Ąđđ€Ą HOE-cahontas đđ was đ„” such a SLUTđ„”đ„”đđ she got đ·đŠ smallpoxđŠ đ· but at least there weren't any SMALL đ€ COCKS đđ!!!!âŒïžâŒïžâŒïžâŒïž time to GOBBLE đŽđŠGOBBLE đŽđŠGOBBLE đŽđŠ on DICK đđ at the SPANKsgiving đđđ THOTluck đ„łđ€€so load đđđ„đ„Șđ„šđđ„§đ„„đ€đ đ up your plate đœïžđœïžđœïž and say grace đđđđâïžđđŒ slather butterđ§ on đ€ your cousins đ§âđŸ BUNS đđđ€€đ€€đ€€ let đdaddyđđ§ pour đ© his đ© GRAVY đŠđŠall over đ„° your đŠđŠ BREAST đŠđ© make sure đ granny đ” gets đ a STUFFING đđđđđ gnaw đïžđđïž on your uncles đ§ HUGE đ± JUICY đ± CORNđ± COBđ±đœđŠ and lick đ
đ
đ
the đŒCREAMđŒ off đđđ your aunties đââïž CUMPKIN đ„§đ„§ PIE đ„§đ„§ now đ spread đ those turkey legs đŠ”đŠ”đand let's đđđđđ see đ€đ€how many đ€Șđ€ȘBEER CANSđ»đ» we can đ€đ€ shove đ€đ€in đ€đ€this đ€bird'sđŠđŠđŠđŠ GAPING HOLE đłïžđłïžđłïžđłïžđłïžđłïžđłïžSEND đâĄïžđ THIS TO 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ OF YOUR đŻđŻđŻđŻđŻSLUTTIEST đŠTURKEYSđŠâŒïžâŒïžâŒïžâŒïž GET 0ïžâŁ BACK đ€ AND YOU'RE A BASIC đ MANBERRY SALAD đ€ąđ€ź BITCH đĄđĄđĄGET 5ïžâŁ BACK âš AND YOU'RE A đđđđTHICCSGIVINGđđđđ THOTTIE đđđđđ GET 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK đČđČ AND đł YOU'RE đŒ A GRAVY đŠđŠ GARGLING đŠđŠPILGRIM đđŠđđŠđđŠđđđđđđđđđđ
đđŒđïžITS THE NATIONALđ«ĄđșđžDAY FOR GIVINGđđ
AND RECEIVING đ©đHAPPY TAINTSGIVING đđTHE EURO-PEE-ONS đ§đœCAME đŠTO PLYMOUTH ROCK đđȘšHARD đ«Šđ„ŽSTUFFED đđŒđđŒTHEIR TURQUEEFS đŠđ«ąAND đđ§GUZZLED GRAVYđ¶âđ«ïžâïž COVERED GIZZARDS đ„TODAY đ«”đŒWE CELEBRATEđđŒ BY BUTTERING đ
đ§ROLLS đ„đPUMP-KIN âđŒđŠCREAM đ„đđŒIN PIES đ„§AND EATING đcASSeroles đCALL UP đČYOUR MASHED đPOTATHOES đźâđšAND đŠTURKEY THOTS đđ»ââïžđAND SPLIT đđœYOUR WISHBONER đŠŽWITH THEMđ„âĄïžSEND THIS TO 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ OF YOURđ€© HORNY-COPIASđŻđGET 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK AND UR âŒïžđ€Ż GETTING STUFFEDđđŒ2ïžâŁNIGHT đđGET LESSđ”âŹïžTHAN 5ïžâŁAND YOURE đ«šâA BLUMPKIN PIEđ°đ°
HAPPY đSPANKSGIVING đŠ YOU đTURKEY đŠ LURKEY SLUTSđâŒïžâŒïž GET â°READY đŹ TO đ° SPREAD đ€ YOUR đšđ± đLEGS, đąđŁ GET đ„đ STUFFEDđ, AND đđŠ LET đ”âđ«YOUR đđ JUICES đđ DRIPđ§DOWN đđ THOSE âšđ€ HUNGRY đ€€đ MOUTHSđ«ŠWITH đđ€ EVERY đ BITEâŒïž đœđœ THE đł BEST đ¶ïžWAY TO đŻ GIVE đčđ THANKS IS đđ đ«šSHAKING âïžđ§THAT đđ SAVORY cASSEROLE đ„AND đ° SHOWING OFF đđŠ THOSE đŻââïžYUMMY đ YAMSâŒïž GOBBLE đȘ©GOBBLE DOWN đžđœ ON đ SOME HOT đŸ đ„PILGRIM đŠ PUSSY đźđ AND SEND đšâĄ THIS âïžđ TO đŠđ€ đ TURKEY đŠ LURKEY SLUTS đ OR YOUR MEALS WILL â BE DRY đŠFOR ETERNITYâŒïž GET đ 5ïžâŁ đ BACK đđ AND đ YOUR đ PLATE đWILL đ€€ BE đ
±ïžđđł LICKED CLEAN âŒïž đ BACK đâ AND YOUâLL BE đ RIDINGđą A đ€Ž GRAVY đČ TRAIN đ
đALL NIGHT đđ LONGâŒïž đ© 1ïžâŁ5ïžâŁ đžâ BACK đđ AND đđ± YOUR đȘ đđ„§PUMPKINđ„PIE đŠ WILL BE đšđŠOVERFLOWING đ§ŽWITH đ«đ MORE ââ WHIPPED đšCREAM đšđ THAN đœ YOU đ§CAN đ„ŻSTOMACHâŒïžâŒïž đ€đ REMEMBER TO â» SUCK đ DOWN đ A đFEW đ GREEN đ BEANS đ„Šđ± TO KEEP đđ© THATđ«MEALđ«BALANCEDđ„, đ AND đ DONT đ STOP FUCKING đŻđ TIL đđ YOU REACH đ A đđ SAFE đ§ŻTEMPERATURE đ„ OF đŁđ„ AT đ đ
±LEAST đ« 165 DEGREES âïžBEFORE đ„đ PULLING OUT đđŻ OF THE đOVEN đ„đ„đđŠđŠ
What đ§ the fuck đ did đł you just đŒ fucking say đŹ about me, đ you little đœ bitch? đâđŠș Iâll have you đ know I đ graduated đđšâđđ©âđ top of my đ€ class in culinary school, and Iâve đ been đ· involved đđ in âš numerous đđ»đđŻđŻ Thanksgiving dinners, and I đ€Ł have over đ 300 confirmed full tummies. đ€€đ I đŠ am đš trained in đź mashing potatoes and Iâm the top turkey fryer in đ€ the entire đđ United đșđž States. You đ are nothing to me but just đŸ another 2ïžâŁ mouth đ€ to feed. I will fill you đ the fuck đą up with precision đ„ș the likes đ of which has đ° never been đŠ seen before đ on this Earth, đ mark my đ€ fucking words. đ You think you can get đ away with saying đ that shit to me đ over âïž the Snapchat? Think đ€đ again, đ fucker. As we đđ€ speak I am contacting my đđ secret network đ of cooks across the USA đșđž and your IP đ©âđš is being traced right đ§ now so you better đ prepare đ for đ€Š the feast, đŽ maggot. ⥠The feast that blows out đ that đ pathetic đšđš little đ€ thing đ” you đ» call đ your stomach. Youâre fucking fed, kid. đŠ I đ€ą can đ€€ be anywhere, anytime, and I đ can đ feed đŽ you casserole đ„ in over seven hundred đŻ ways, and thatâs đ€Ź just đđ with my bare đđ„ hands. đ«âïž Not only am I extensively trained đ§ đđŠłđ in 𧞠pies, đ„§đșđž but â I have access âż to the entire đŹ pantry of the United States government đ© and I will use it to its full extent to feed your miserable face, you little shit. đđ If only you could have known đđ« what â unholy đ retribution đ€Ł your little đ€ âcleverâ comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you đ would â
have held đšâđŒ your fucking đ tongue. đ But đ you đđ couldnât, you đđœ didnât, đ and now youâre đŒ paying the price, you goddamn idiot. đą I will pour gravy all over đđ your đ plate and you đ will drown in đș it. Youâre fucking đđ fed, kiddo. đł
Its finally my turn to be the Thanksgiving turkey! đŽđŠ After 18 years of eating my families stuffing I finally get my time to shine! đâš Everyone will be lining up to taste me, mommy, daddy, my brother, sisters, even my uncles! đź I'm a little nervous, đ but also excited! đ And dont tell mommy, but I've been practicing stuffing myself.. đ„đ I'm sure afterwards some people wont talk to me until next year, đ
ââïž but that's just the fun of the holiday! đ I'm excited for another great thanksgiving this year âŒïžđŻđ
LISTEN UP BITCHES đđđđđđ IT'S SLUTS-GIVING đŠđŠđŠđđđ YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS đ„”đ„”đ„”đŻđŻđŻ TURKEY AIN'T THE ONLY THING GOBBLING TODAY đŠđŠđŠđ
đ
đ
TIME đđđ TO CREAM YOUR CORN đœđœđœ FIND A WISH-BONE TO BREAK đŠŽđŠŽđŠŽđđđ AND SUCK SOME CORNU-COPIOUS DICK đđđ IF YOU'RE GETTING THIS âŹïžâŹïžâŹïž IT MEANS YOU'VE BEEN A GOOD LITTLE MASHED POTATO HOE đ«đ«đ«đ„đ„đ„ SEND THIS âïžâïž TO 5ïžâŁ THANKFUL THOTTIES đđđđđđ TO MAKE THEIR BEANS đ«đ«đ« GREEN WITH ENVY đ«đ«đ«đ±đ±đ± SEND THIS âïžâïž TO 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ SKANKS-GIVING SLUTS đđđđđđđ©âđŸđ©âđŸđ©âđŸ TO GET GRAVY đŠđŠđŠđđđ POURED ALL OVER YOUR TURKEY BREASTS đđđđŽđŽđŽ SEND THIS âïžâïž TO 2ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ SWEET POTATOES đ đ đ đđđ TO GET YOUR TURKEY STUUUUUUUFFFFFFFED đđđđœđœđœ IF YOU GET 0ïžâŁ BACK YOU'RE A DRY TURKEY HOE đŠđŠđŠđđđđđđ IF YOU GET 5ïžâŁ BACK YOU'RE A YUMMY SAUCY SLUT đđđđŠđŠđŠđđđ IF YOU GET 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK YOU'RE GETTING YOUR TURKEY JERKED ALL NIGHT đłđłđłđđđđ«đ«đ«đđ IF YOU GET 2ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ BACK YOU'RE ONE BADDDDD MOTHER STUFFER đŠđŠđŠđ„”đ„”đ„”đœđœđœ DON'T FORGET TO ATONE đđđ FOR THE SINS đđđ OF YOUR COLONIZER ANCESTORS âïžâïžâïžđđđđđđđșđČđșđČđșđČ HAPPY SLUTSGIVING!!! đŁđŁđŁđ„°đ„°đ„°
HAPPY FUCKSGIVING 𫶠YOU TURKEY COCK đGOBBLERSđŠ CHRISTOPHER COLCUMBUS đŠCAME ON AMERICA đșđž RIDING THE GAYFLOWER đč ACROSS THE SEA đSO THAT YOU đCAN SPREAD đ€žââïžYOUR GRAVY đŠALL OVER YOUR SMASHED POTATHOESđœïž GOBBLE GOBBLEđđ ON A BIG DICK đTHIS YEARđ WHITE MEAT đ€ DARK MEAT đ€ WE LOVE IT ALL â€ïžâđ„ THE TURKEY đŠ ISNT THE ONLY THING đ GET STUFFED TONIGHT đ€°IF U R LUCKY âšUR MOMMY đ© đ€±WILL FIST YOUđ«”JUST LIKE SHE FISTS đ€ THE TURKEY đ
WE EATIN đ CUMPKIN PIE FOR DESSERT đ§ EXTRA CREAMY đš AND DONT đ YOU CUM CLUCKERS đŠđŠ FORGET THIS IS STOLEN LAND đ«”đ«” SEND THIS TO TEN SLUTTY PILGRIMS đ§âđŸđšâđŸWHOSE GRAVY YOU WANT TO TASTEđ
IF YOU GET ONE âïž BACK YOU CAN COP A FEEL đđ€ON THAT TURKEY BREAST đ IF YOU GET THREE đ„ JOHN SMITH WILL CUM đŠđŠTO UR BED TONIGHT đŽđ€€ IF YOU GET FIVE 5ïžâŁ UNCLE SAM đșđžđșđž WILL EAT UR ASS đ IF YOU GET TEN đđ€ YOU GET TO EAT đŽEVERYONES MEAT đ đ„©THIS SPANKSGIVING đđ€€đŠ
HAPPY THOTSGIVING BITCHHHHHđŠđŠđŠđŠđŽđ
đ
TURKEY ISNT THE ONLY THING GETTING STUFFED đđ»đđ»đ
đ©đ©đ© YOUâRE MY FAVORITE HOEđđŠâ€ïž â€ïžIM SO THANKFUL đđTO HAVE A FILTHY SLUT LIKE U IN MY LIFE đđŠđŠđŠđ đđ ARE YOU GONNA EAT SOME CUMpkin PIE?? đ„§ đ„§YOU BETTER NOT â BE DRY AS A TURKEY đŠ đŠđŠđŠ YOU MY TURKEY THOT đŻGOBBLE GOBBLEđŠđŻđŻ
đ„” đŠ Gobble đ gobble đ GOBBLE đ đ you SLUTTY TURKEYS đŠđŠđ€€ Itâs SPANKSGIVING đđŠ đđœïž and time to STUFF that PEACH đ with DADDY'S đđ„”đ„” FAMOUS RECIPE đ đŠđŸ Itâs the 1ïžâŁ day đđŠ to be a GLUTTON đœïžđ€€ for that GRAVYYY đŠđŠđŠâš itâs time â° đł to get your đŠŽ đ«” SPINE BENT đ and YOUR HOLE đłïžđ€đŒ STUFFED đđź with WHITE MEAT đ€ or DARK MEAT đ€ we LOVE it ALL â€ïžâđ„ đ«đŠ are you đ«” đ€ gonna be a good đđ€little PUMPKIN? đ đ
đ€€ or are you gonna make đđ§đ»ââïž daddy WORK for that âšđđ€ final SLICE of PIE?đ„§đŠ??? Hope youâre PREPARED đđŠ đ for some POST-DINNER DICKINâ đđ because DADDY wants to baste you đ„”đ€Čđœ with extra MEATY SAUCE đŠđđ€°If youâre LUCKY đ€đ MOMMY đ© đ€±might FIST YOU đ„đ«”đ± just like she FISTS đ€đ THE TURKEY đ
đŠđŠ
Send to 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ HUNGRY HUNGRY HOES đ đŻââïž or your COOCHIE đȘ will be DRYER đ„Ž đ” than LEFTOVER TURKEY đ
đŠ âŒïž if you get 7ïžâŁ back, ZADDY đœïžđ©đŠwill GOBBLE GOBBLE đ„đŠ YOUR COOTER UP đ±đđŠ if you get 4ïžâŁ back your MOUTH đđ«Š will be putting in WORK đźâđšđ« for those CUMMIES đŠ if you get less than 3ïžâŁ back, your COOCHIE CASSEROLE đœïž is NASTAYYYY đ€źđ€ą
HEY you đ«”đŠ turkey đŠ lurkey SLUTâŒïžđ
đ
Itâs đ SPANKSgiving! đâȘïžđđ. You know what that meansâ đ it's time đ to gobbleđ gobbleđ gobbleđ on a big olđđ dickđđđ„
Back in 1ïžâŁ4ïžâŁ9ïžâŁ2ïžâŁ, the pilgrimsđđ rode the GAYflower đłïžâđđč â”ïž across the ASSlantic đđŠ HOEcean and đđâ”landed onđđPLYMOUTH COCKđđ Together with the đ NAUGHTY đ NATIVES đč, they gathered đ« around the HORNY-copia đœ đ„đ„đ¶đâïž and had đ our nationâs very 1ïžâŁst MUCK BANG! đœïžđŻââïžđŻđŻââïž
Every year đ we honor đđđ» their gorging đŽđź by giving THANKS đđŒ to all đ„° thatâs important â€ïž to us: Family đšâđ©âđ§âđŠ, Friends đŹ, Freedom đșđž, and DICK đđ
So grab your BUNS, đâđ, butter your CORNCOB đ§đœ squeeze those BREASTS, đđ„đ€Č and dig âïž into some Green BEAN Casser-Hole đłđ«
Send this to 3ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ of your sexiest đ„”đ Squanto sluts đȘ¶đđŻ đœđœ Get 5ïžâŁ back and youâre a mashed potatHOE đ„đđ. Get 1ïžâŁ0ïžâŁ back and you'll get your gravy garggled đŠđđąïžGet đœđ„2ïžâŁ0ïžâŁđ„đœ or more backđand you'llđ need that đŠ tryptophan đŠđŠ bc you'ređŽgonna be đŽđđsleepingđđ with everyone this ThiccsgivingđŠđđ
đŁïžđŁïž HAPPY THANKSGIVING đŁïžđŁïž ALL OF YOU đđ SLUTTY đđ đŠđŠ TURKEYS đŠđŠ!! HOPE đ«”đŒđ«”đŒ YOUâRE đ«”đŒđ«”đŒ READY TO đđ CRAM đđ DADDYâS DICK INTO YOUR đđ« BERRY đđ«!! HE ââ CANâT ââ WAIT TO STUFF YOU đ«đŸđ«đ» FULL đ€°đŒđ€°đœWITH HIS đđœ VEGETABLE đđœ AND đđŠ BASTE đđŠ YOU WITH HIS âšâš SPECIAL BRINE âšâš!! AND IF YOUâRE A đđ GOOD đđ LITTLE đđ PUMPKIN PIE đ„§đ„§, HEâLL EVEN LET YOUđŽđŽ TRY đŽđŽSOME OF HIS đ«Šđ«Š DELICIOUS GRAVY đŸđŸ! đđ SEND đđ THIS TO ALL OF YOUR đđŒđđŒ THANKFUL đđŒđđŒ đđ THOTSđđâŒïžâŒïž GET 1ïžâŁ RESPONSE BACK AND YOUâRE A đčđč CUM-HUNGRY đ©đ© COLONIZERđ©đ©. GET 5 RESPONSES BACK AND YOUâLL GET đšđšđš SMASHED đ»đ·đžMORE THAN AN IDA-HOE đđ POTATO đ„đ„. GET đšđš 10 RESPONSES đšđšBACK AND đđ DADDY đđ WILL MAKE SURE YOUR đœïžđœïž PLATE đœïžđœïž GETS đ
đ
LICKED đ§Œđ«§ CLEAN đ§Œđ«§
My booty đ brothers and slutty đââïž sisters, let us give đ©đ©đ© spanks đ that on this day, 4ïžâŁ7ïžâŁ years ago, Daddy đš Marty Scorsese railed đ« a fat line đ of coke âïžâïžâïž and said âletâs have the đŠ horniest đŠ fucking đ Thanksgiving đŠ ever.â
He called up âïž Ramblin Robbie Robertson and said âsqueeze that fat đ· hog đ into the đŁ tightest pair of jeans đ you can find, itâs time for The đ Last Waltz đđ».â
Robbie called đ up Levon Helm, who pounds đȘ the drums đ„ as hard as I wish he would pound my đŁđŁđŁ gaping booty đ. Along came Dirty Dick đđ Danko, Richard âMan Juiceâ đ©đŠ Manuel and đ«Ł Girth Hudson as well.
Then Marty snorted another đ±đ±đ± ball and said âthereâs not enough đ cocks at this gang bang đŻââïžđŻââïž.â So they called âïž all their slutty friends. Dr John đšđ»ââïž came and brought his đ©ș PhD (Pretty huge Dickđ) and đź đŁ Horni Mitchell got them all soaking wet đđ with her dulcimer. But no one rocked out đ¶đ” or cocked out đđ harder than Neil Young and his nose đđ» full of booger shooger đ€ą.
So fist đ your turkey đŠ , get đ« stuffed full of cock đ and put that movie đ„ on LOUD đą. The only thing louder than the đ” music should be all the sluts đŻââïž across the world đ screaming đ«đ«đ« in delight tonight when we all remember The đ Last Waltz đđ».
GLAZE MY THIGHS đŠ SLAP MY BUTT đŠ MAKE ME YOUR đŠ TURKEY SLUT đŠ EAT MY BREAST đŠ EAT MY WINGS đŠ JUST DON'T FINISH IN MY STUFFING đŠ DADDY'S DRUMSTICK LOOKS SO YUMMY đŠSHOOT YOUR GRAVY AND FILL MY TUMMY đŠ
Gobble gobble GOBBLE đŠđ€€ ZADDYâS ROASTED MEATS đđ©đ todayâs the 1ïžâŁ day to be a GLUTTON đ€€ for that GRAVYYY đŠđŠđŠ be a GOOD đ girl and make yourself đââïž a BUFFET SPREAD đ«Š for daddyâs GOOD MOUTH đđ and NASTY đ€Ș WORDS đ SNAP đ„ more than the WISH BONE đŠŽâš you gotta get YOUR đ«” SPINE BENT đ and YOUR HOLE đłïžđ€đŒ STUFFED đđź send to 5ïžâŁ HUNGRY HUNGRY HOES đŻââïž or your COOCHIE đȘ will be DRYER đ” than the TURKEY đŠ TIDDIES âŒïž if you get 7ïžâŁ back, ZADDY will GOBBLE GOBBLE đ„đŠ YOUR PUSSAY UP đ±đđŠ if you get 4ïžâŁ back your MOUTH đđ«Š will be putting in WORK đźâđšđ« for those CUMMIES đŠ if you get less than 3ïžâŁ back, your COOCHIE CASSEROLE đœïž is NASTAYYYY đ€źđ€ą
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Happy SPANKSGIVING you đ SLUT! đŠ Gobble me đđ, swallow me đ€€đŠ, drip your đŻ gravy đ„Ł down the side đ of me đđŠ! Are you ready đœïž for daddyâs âš special stuffing? đđ§ Get in đ that oven đ„, I want my pie đ„§ to be EXTRA warm đ„đ! Slide me that đ„ celery, and letâs get DRESSED UP like đ„Ș turkey on Thanksgiving đđ! Iâll be the cranberry đ on your roll đ„, drizzled with honey đŠ and sprinkled with sugar đŹ! Now send this to 10 đ of your most đ€ slutty đ friends or prepare to lose OUT on the juiciest cumpkin cream pies, baby! đ°đ If you receive 5ïžâŁ back đ, youâre officially a LEGENDARY đ stuffing đŠ master in this CUMPKIN-SPICED đ holiday of LOVE! đđđ
