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Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline.

    The Mental Health Hotline is a voice recorded message that people often set as their ringtone or send through emails as a joke in the early 2000s.

    Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line. If you are dyslexic, press 6969696969. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have post-traumatic-stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

    “fuck it we ball” becomes far more weighty

      "fuck it we ball" becomes far more weighty once we account for the pre-existing axiom that is "ball is life," for the latter effectively transforms the former into "fuck it we live." and what maxim could be more gravely important than that which urges man to persist at all costs?

      I am simply him, I am the ultimate Growtopian.

        I am simply him, I am the ultimate Growtopian. When I was born I was born with the default Growtopian swag. My box-shaped head, my green shirt, my sexy redhead, and my jeans are a sign of this. I was always hungry for profit, I would steal the crayons of other kids in kindergarten and sell them after school on the streets. One faithful day tho, I stumbled across Growtopia. When papi Ubisoft blessed me with my first ever world lock I was flabbergasted. I could not breathe, the shine, the golden color was too much to take in. I knew I needed more. That night I stole my mom's credit card and spent the remaining 200 dollars of our family's worth on gems, what a blessing it was. I wasn't done though, I took a second mortgage on our house for more gems, more wls. I sold my brother on ebay for 5 dollars and bought more gems, my empire grew and grew. but there was no end in sight, I was too deep into the rabbit hole. It didn't matter if I was homeless now that I had the blessing of Ubisoft and my world locks. One unfortunate night when I was living in my little tent down the street a group of very suspicious people appeared. Thet seemed really angry saying things like "kontol", "anjing" and some "WKWKWK". I could not tell what was happening but next thing I know is my little tent turning upside down, my phone stripped from my hands and before my eyes, a group of 4 indos stole all my wls and dropped them into their display box in their world. They started to dance over me saying "WOKWOKWOKWOKWOK" and "NOOB LOL". My pride, my life and my world has been shattered. I humbly ask you all to give me some wls.

        Black History Month

          Hello, 🤔💁 fellow 💦 Black 👱👍 People. 👨 It is 👅 us, 👨👩 [MULTI-BILLION DOLLAR 💵🔜 CORPORATION]. Here to ⛪ remind 🤔 you that 👇👉 we support ♀ your 😡 colour, now 🕓 that it has made it 👏 into international 🍒🍒 news 🦑 and it ✋ is 😂😩 completely socially safe 💖☝ to 🅱🆒 mention you, allowing for 🎅 us to capitalise on 🔛 your existence now it's 🐈😞 mainstream. Look, 👁👀 we even used 🏭 the hashtag of 💯💰 [event]! 👐 Why ❓😕 did 💁 we 👮 wait this ❓🤔 long 🕗 to 🔓✂ come out 🕳 and 👎 'support' 👬 you? 🏼 Haha, 😂😂 no ❌🙅 more ✔ questions, ❓❓ Black 🏿 People. Buy o
          🆘‼️ATTENTION‼️ALL MELANIN MAGGOTS 🫥🫵🏿🆘DRIP DADDY 💦😫MARTIN LUTER KING 👑ONCE SAID “I 👁 have a dream 🛌💭 that my four 4️⃣little children 👶🏾👦🏾will one ☝🏾day ☀ live in a nation 🏞 where they will not be 🐝 judged 👨🏻‍⚖️🤬by the color 🎨of their skin 🙏🏾but by the content 🏗of their character 👺.” CELEBRATE🎊 THA LEGACY💯💯✊🏿 BY DROPPIN DAT ASS 🍑💯🍑😩✊🏾💯 THE ENTIRETY ⏳OF FEBRUARY🙌🏾🎂 SEND THIS TO 🔟 FELLOW NIGGAS😎 OR ELSE MALCOM X 🙅🏾❌ WILL FIND YOU🔎🌍👿‼️ HIM N THICK MAMA 💸😫💦HARRIET T. 🚂ARE TIGHT 🤝🏾 👀 watch out🏃🏽if u don’t send this 😨 then uR ⚫️💳BLACK CARD💳⚫️ AND MELANIN🤘🏾 GETTIN REVOKED 😾🖕🏼👿 
          HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH, WHORES! 💕💋A month all about worshiping that big, fat, watery BLACK COCK!😍 In honor of black history month, ALL of our cream babies have to be slutty SEX slaves for the choccy hotties! 👿😈So pull out those kinky little chains and whips BECAUSE ITS FEBHOEARY!! Send this to 10 other people who love ❤️ freedom or else you will get NO BBC this WHOLE MONTH! 😝

          War…. has changed

            MGS4 'War has changed' script

            The ‘War has changed’ copypasta came from the opening scene of Metal Gear Solid 4 where old Solid Snake gives his thoughts on how war is no longer about disagreement but a routine for other people to make money.

            War.... has changed.
            
            It's no longer about nations, ideologies, or ethnicity. It's an endless series of proxy battles, fought by mercenaries and machines.War--and it's consumption of life--has become a well-oiled machine.War has changed.ID-tagged soldiers carry ID-tagged weapons, use ID-tagged gear. Nanomachines inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilities.Genetic control, information control, emotion control, battlefield control…everything is monitored and kept under control.War…has changed.The age of deterrence has become the age of control, all in the name of averting catastrophe from weapons of mass destruction, and he who controls the battlefield, controls history.War…has changed.When the battlefield is under total control, war becomes routine.
            War has changed.
            
            It's no longer about nations, ideologies, or ethnicity. It's an endless series of proxy battles, fought by mercenaries and machines.
            
            War--and it's consumption of life--has become a well-oiled machine.
            
            War has changed.
            
            ID-tagged soldiers carry ID-tagged weapons, use ID-tagged gear. Nanomachines inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilities.
            
            Genetic control, information control, emotion control, battlefield control…everything is monitored and kept under control.
            
            War…has changed.
            
            The age of deterrence has become the age of control, all in the name of averting catastrophe from weapons of mass destruction, and he who controls the battlefield, controls history.
            
            War…has changed.
            
            When the battlefield is under total control, war becomes routine.

            Gaming…has changed

            Gaming... has changed. It's no longer about creativity, friends, or teamwork. It's a endless series of multiplayer matches  fought by other players and ai’s. Gaming, and it's production of life, has become a well charged machine. Gaming has changed. Players play as I.d tagged programs, use i.d tagged weapons, create i.d tagged profiles. Soda and chips inside their bodies enhance and regulate experiences. Fun control. Graphic control. Gameplay control. Opinion control. Every game played is logged and controlled. Gaming has changed. The age of experience has turned to the age of transactions. For he who is admin of a match, controls the server. Gaming... has changed. When everything you
            Play is under control... video games, become a daily routine
            gaming has changed. It's no longer about players, unlocks, or enjoyment. It's an endless series of proxy battles fought by corporations and players. Gaming - and its false promise of finished games - has become a profit machine. Gaming has changed. DLC packs, Players buy un-finished games, use online transactions. energy drinks inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilities. micro transactions control. useless DLC bundle control, player control. Gaming control. Everything is half assed and kept under control. Gaming has changed.