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Look kid, I fuck more attractive women than you have ever even seen…

    Look kid, I fuck more attractive women than you have ever even seen with your prepubescent, desperate virgin eyes. I once beat up an ex heavy weight boxer because he looked at me wrong. He begged me to stop. He begged me to just let him go, But I didn’t stop. You sit there in with your shitty computer, no job prospects past your nearest McDonald, and call me a beta male? You can’t even get the greese stains off of your shit between your fourth and fifth abdominal roll without the help of your mother, whom you have single handedly lead into an unimaginable misery by your mere pathetic existence. Take some of those bigs words and bring them outside into the real world. That way someone can beat you up before they send you crawling home to lick your wounds and make pissy internet videos bitching about people that you cannot even begin to understand from behind the drool covered binoculars you call glasses.

    Using an auto is like using porn. Manual is like sex.

      Source
      Using an auto is like using porn. Manual is like sex.

Sex really benefits from developing a relationship, paying attention, practice and focus. Its work.

You can have sex without these qualities but the sex suffers, and so does the experience of driving a manual.

When you just need to get off and not pay attention - automatic transmission.

You can still have fun - especially left foot braking without a clutch, but it's designed to be convenient.

      ‼️ATTENTION, CITIZEN‼️ ‼️警告Uh oh! You’ve made an oopsie, citizen!

        Origin

        This is part of the China/CCP copypasta specifically the ‘ATTENTION CITIZEN‘ type that often spread as a mockery of the Chinese social credit system.

        ‼️ATTENTION, CITIZEN‼️

‼️警告Uh oh! You've made an oopsie, citizen! 200 social credit points have been deducted from your ID card! Be sure to behave better or you know what happens!!!警告‼️

⚠️市民请注意‼️ This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. () 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 因此，您的个人资料中的 15 ( -15 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you not hesitate, more Social Credits ( - Social Credits )will be discounted from your profile, resulting in the lowering of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫，更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折，从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。 为党争光! Glory to the PRC!

‼️ -1000 Social Credits, Bad work peasant! You have disrespected our great leader Xi Jinping公轉急序土 and talked about the Tiannamen Square, off to you to the re-education camp! Remember to use the promo code "BEIJING" at your checkout to recieve a free food resource for your family a day. Good bye citizen and glory to the CCP!‼️

Note: "glory to the CCP and Xi Jinping!" Don't forget to say this every morning for +5 daily social credit points! 祝你好运‼️

        You have to have a very high IQ to understand Neon Genesis Evangelion

          Origin

          The original variation was for Rick and Morty that started from a 4chan post. The copypasta template has since been adapted to fit different medias. 

          To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Neon Genesis Evangelion. The plot is extremely complex, and without a solid grasp of human psychology most of the themes will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Anno's atheistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his show- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Søren Kierkegaard literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these characters, to realize that they’re not just cartoons- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Evangelion truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the depth in Gendo's famous line “Get in the robot, Shinji,” which itself is a cryptic reference to Sigmund Freud's idea of the Oedipus Complex and how Shinji is fighting the urge to literally be inside his mother. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Hideaki Anno’s genius wit unfolds itself on their screens. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂

And yes, by the way, i DO have a Eva tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid 😎

          I’ve become so much like Shinji Ikari it’s scary.

            Origin

            The original variation of this copypasta is for Eren Jaeger from Attack on Titan. It started from 4chan and became a meme within the anime community. The copypasta has been adopted to fit different characters from other anime or medium.

            I've become so much like Shinji Ikari it's scary.

I run away from women and have no friends.

When I cum i can't help but say "戦い, 戦い" (which means "I'm so fucked up" in american.)

I can't masturbate to regular porn anymore , now i only masturbate to hospital CCTV footage of comatose patients

Whenever I see a guy flirting with me i either get extremely homophobic or have sex with them on the spot

When my mom dies i plan on gutting her insides , getting inside her and piloting her like EVA-01