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Simp Copypasta

Browse every Simp copypasta from the infamous Discord message “can we honestly e date?” to the classic “*JAW DROPS humina humina awooga” copypasta.


I want to bang the terraria zoologist

    Terraria zoologist copypasta
    Holy fucking shit. I want to bang the terraria zoologist so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time a blood moon occurs I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of her online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Astria. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Astria's tight fox pussy. I want her to have my mutant human/fox babies.

Fuck, my fucking mom caught me with a fox in the backyard. I dressed her in my sister's skirt and went to fucking town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my computer. I might not ever get to see Astria again.

    It is physically impossible to simp for pokimane

      Simp means Sucker Idolizing Mediocre Pussy. A man is only a simp if the girl he is after has a mediocre pussy, but pokimane’s pussy is a goddess pussy, at worst. I will continue to donate 50% of my paycheck to pokimane because I know that it’s not simping. Poki if you see this I love you please text me back.

      My girlfriend just got this dm on discord.

        May i, (insert name here) a woman respecting and feminist- supportive male, see at least one breast from you my queen? I do not mean to come on as an improper male, and if this request disturbs you, please make me aware. You, my queen, deserve the utmost respect of any female. However, many of my gender seem to sexualize women and view them as sex toys. However, my Queen, I do not share these views. Rather, I value the female spectrum of the human race as the superior, and 1, a respectful male, request for the viewing of an isolated, singular breast from your body. I await your response my Queen.

        Goodbye, poki…

          I'm cancelling my tier 3 sub. 3 years, pokimane. 3 years I donated to you, moderated your chat and kept the scum at bay. 3 years of asking you how your day is, defending your honour in chat and even on twitter. 3 years... wasted.

I hope you read this, pokimane. I'm throwing away my copy of just dance I bought just to play with you in online coop. What use do I have for this? For one, I have no one to play it with (THANKS A LOT) and secondly, I don't feel like dancing right now, ever.

You danced right out of my life... and my heart.

I've just followed kittyplays, so long, pokimane. Hope it was worth it.

          Found on r/pokimane

            I admire her bravery so much. I dont have children but every day i practice talking to my future daughters across the table and telling them about how great Pokimane is. I tell them "sweety, you're a pokimane". I literally turned her name into a word that describes beauty, bravery, and poise.

I practice driving my future daughters to school and play highlights of pokimanes best laughs over the years. Sometimes we even have to pull over because we start crying from how much we love her. I hold my imaginary daughters and i howl. i howl and cry and rage into the steering wheel about how special she is, and how the world just cant understand.

            I’ve jerked off to the vampire girl from hotel Transylvania a total of 214 times.

              I’ve jerked off to the vampire girl from hotel Transylvania a total of 214 times. All I want in life is to penetrate her pale virgin vampire pussy with my 5.6 inch horse schlong and impregnate her while my dad watches and cheers me on. God just the thought of her sucking the smegma from my foreskin makes me cum my pants. I would literally kill myself tomorrow just to suck a single one of her toes today, why can’t she just fucking be real fuuuuuck