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Salem, my name is Ken-myrza.

    From 4chan its satire of the ‘Gomenasai, my name is Ken-Sama’ copypasta but changed to Kazakhstan.

    Salem, my name is Ken-myrza.

I'm a 27 year old American Kazakhboo (Kazakhstan fan for you sheteldiks). I enjoy erecting yurts in my garden, and spend my days listening to superior Kazakh oral poetry (Alpamys Batyr, Koblandy Batyr, Qyz Jibek) and telling people that Borat isn't
representative of Kazakh culture.

I train in traditional Kazakh archery every day, including sadak atu (foot archery) and zhamby atu (horseback archery). Kazakh bows are vastly superior to any other weapon on earth. I earned my archery license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.
I speak Kazakh fluently, both Soltüstik-şıgys and the Oñtüstik dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about Kazakh history and their Turkic batyr warrior code, which I follow 100%.

When I get my Kazakh visa, I am moving to Astana (formerly Nursultan) to attend a prestigious High School to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become an avant- garde futuristic post-Soviet architect and find a beautiful wasian wife!
I own several shapans, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to Kazakhstan, so I can fit in easier. I offer horse meat to my elders and seniors and speak Kazakh as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond.

Wish me luck in Kazakhstan!

    today my husband asked me, “9s or me?”

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      today, my husband asked me, "9s or me?" Which is so funny because i had to remind him, “baby you ARE 9s. "9s laughed, but then he got blurry, and the nurse walked in and forced me to take my pills

      Tatsuki Fujimoto and his pet fish

        The quote came from the creator of Chainsaw Man, Tatsuki Fujimoto himself from 藤本タツキ短編集 22-26 [Fujimoto Tatsuki Tanpenshū 22-26]. The story is often joked around by his fans for its unhinged nature and explains the insanity of his mangas.

        Until age 24 or so, I lived with my girlfriend in a 15,000-yen apartment in Yamagata. The people around us were kind and would give us fruits and vegetables. So while we didn't have much, I think we ate a well-balanced diet.

Even though we were poor, we had a pet Japanese rice fish. I found it dead one summer. I went to toss its body in the trash like in Parasyte, but my girlfriend said she wanted me to bury it, so I went off into the park, alone. I tried to bury it under this big tree, but the ground was too hard, my hands got all dirty, and I had no hole to show for my effort. Out of options, I figured I would pretend I had buried the fish and left it lying there on top of the ground. As I watched it for a little while, ants found the body and began trying to carry it away. I'm not sure what came over me, but in that moment, love for the pet fish welled from within me for the first time. I brushed the ants away, and then I ate it.

The next day I had an upset stomach. And when my girlfriend suggested it was something I'd eaten, I came up with some lie cover up the fact that I'd eaten our pet fish. I've had people get mad at me many times throughout my life, and when I'm scared of that, the lies just spill out. Most of the time I get caught in them, but this time I didn't.

That brings us to now. The memory of lying to my girlfriend is far stronger than the guilt of eating our pet fish. Please allow me to confess my sin here.

        Lionheart copypasta

          The song SERENITY – Lionheart became a meme in osu! due to the song’s over-the-top, repetitive lyrics and its immense popularity among top players for farming high-ranked scores (FCs) with HardRock/DoubleTime (HDDT) mods around 2022.

          To seek the glory days 🌅 we'll fight the lion's way 🦁 then let the rain wash 🌧 all of your pride away 😇 so if this victory 🏆 is our last odyssey 🚗 then let the POWER within us decide 💪 
          Like a lion 🦁 we fight 👊 Together we will die 💀 For the glory of our god 😇 Justice on our side ✝️ This cross will lead to light 💡 Follow Richard Lionheart 🙏

          Merzbow, Boredoms, the Gerogerigegege, Coil… (merzbow copypasta)

            AKA the Merzbow copypasta or the poseurcore copypasta is a list of experimental and obscure music that started from a 4chan /mu/ thread asking about people’s poseurcore list. The original 2016 version of the copypasta was shorter but had since been expanded when it became meme.

            Merzbow, Boredoms, the Gerogerigegege, Coil, Throbbing Gristle, Whitehouse, Nurse with Wound, Einstürzende Neubauten, Brainbombs, Egor Letov, Death in June, Current 93, La Monte Young, Moondog, Lou Harrison, Henry Cowell, Luigi Russolo, Popol Vuh, Fishmans, Jean-Jacques Perrey, Les Rallizes Dénudés, Rainbow Caroliner, Taj Mahal Travellers, Fushitsusha, Peter Brötzmann, John Cage, Scott Walker, Unwound, Dead, Frank Zappa, Morton Feldman, Captain Beefheart, Pharoah Sanders, Albert Ayler, Ornette Coleman, Alice Coltrane, Arnold Schoenberg, Pierre Boulez, György Ligeti, Karlheinz Stockhausen, Nang Nang, Thinking Fellers Union Local 282, Nara Leão, Basic Channel, Raymond Scott, Delia Derbyshire, Daphne Oram, Noah Howard, Terry Riley, Peter Sotos, Lula Côrtes e Zé Ramalho, Boyd Rice, Mahmoud Ahmed, Henry Flynt, Kazumoto Endo, David Tudor, Aporea, Half Japanese, Mega Banton, Secret Chiefs 3, Keiji Haino, Ramleh, Otomo Yoshihide, John Zorn, Joe Meek, Robbie Basho, Phil Spector, Faxed Head, Harry Partch, Wesley Willis, Fred Frith, The Residents, Sun Ra, Sun City Girls, Hans Krüsi, Royal Trux, Jandek, Yat-Kha, Loren Mazzacane Connors, Pärson Sound, The Dead C, Comus, Cromagnon, Eliane Radigue, Arthur Doyle, Shizuka, The Red Krayola, Henry Cow, Magma, Opus Avantra, Pan.Thy.Monium., Murmuüre, Ksiezyc, Gong, Cukor Bila Smert', cLOUDDEAD, Muslimgauze and Kaoru Abe

            This game is NOT for kids!😡 (Geometry Dash)

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              What was Robert "Robtop" "RubRub" Topala thinking when making this game?! The game obviously presents itself as "family friendly" or "educational" with its title "Geometry Dash", while not being EITHER or them!!!! Robert "Robtop" "RubRub" Topala has been putting explicit language and HORRIFYING graphics in this game and it STILL SOMEHOW got 13+ age rating???!!! For example in the spin-off gane "Geometry Dash Subzero" has a skull character saying "G*d d*mn" WITHOUT SENCORING IT MIND YOU!!!! And the level "Clubstep" in the original game has ABSOLUTELY HORRIFYING monsters that many kids have surely got nightmares!!! AND TO TOP ALL OF TAHT OFF, ANYONE, mind you, ANYONE can upload any levels they want, with many of them being h*ll themed and SOMEHOW Robert "Robtop" "RubRub" Topala Is not banning the users who make abominations like this!?!?!? AND ALL of the top levels have a horrifying name!!! For example "Tidal Wave" WHY IS Robert "Robtop" "RubRub" Topala ALLOWING THESE KINDS OF NAMES?!?!?!? We need to UNITE, TOGETHER WE CAN TAKE THIS ABOMINATION OF A GAME OFF THE INTERNET AND MAKE THIS WORLD A BETTER PLACE!!!!!!