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Please don’t give birth in the voice channel

    Your average Discord copypasta
    Hi @Everyone,

New rule (and I can't believe I have to say this) please don't give birth in the voice channel. It makes people very uncomfortable.
     @everyone

hello everyone! new rule has been added (can't believe i have to say this) please don't give birth in vc. it makes people very uncomfortable. i don't want to have this added to the rules as it is very embarrassing for me as a server owner and the rest of the people trying to enjoy the server. this is your final warning

    My name is Guido Mista.

      My name is Guido Mista. I'm 44 years old. My house is in the southwest section of Naples, where all the slums are, and I have 4 wives. I work as a hitman for Passione, and I get home every day by 4:44 AM at the latest. I smoke 4 packs a day, and I always drink. I'm in bed by 4:44PM, and make sure I get 4 hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of cold beer and doing about 44 minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have problems sleeping and I stay up until morning. Just like an elderly, I wake up with fatigue and stress in the morning. I was told there were issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care seek trouble with enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me sadness. Although, if I were to fight I would lose to everyone.

      I am sick of Jett

        Parody of the Xiangling copypasta but changed to Jett from Valorant due to her popularity.

        I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Jett. I try to play Reyna, my Jett deals more damage. I try to play Pheonix, my Jett deals more damage. I try to play Neon, my Jett has better movement. I want to play Yoru, my team tells me to play Jett. Riot tried to nerf her, but she is still meta. I want to play a normal match, I get sniped by an enemy Jett. She grabs me by the throat. I instalock her. I grind for her. I buy her a Vandal. She isn't satisfied. I buy an Operator. "I need more skins", she tells me. "Buy me Kunai and Operator skins." She grabs all ult orbs and force me to snipe long. "You just need better aim. I can deal more damage with cooler skins." I can't buy skins. I don't have enough Valorant Points. She grabs my credit card. It declines. "Guess this is the end." She grabs her Kunai. She says "Get out of my way!" There is no hint of sadness in her eyes. Nothing but pure 100% accuracy even when moving. What a cruel world

        EVERYTHING IS LITERALLY CHEATING

          Wearing armor, casting magic, power stancing heavy weapons, using moonveil, using rivers of blood, using bleed weapons, using frost weapons, using any status ailment, using consumeables, leveling up, upgrading weapons, upgrading flasks, drinking flasks IS LITERALLY CHEATING and if you used any of them in your playthrough you should travel to japan and commit suduko in front of Micheal Zakis-san-sama-senpai-kuns front door

          Guys can you please not spam the chat

            Guys can you please not spam the chat. My mom bought me this new laptop and it gets really hot when the chat is being spamed. Now my leg is starting to hurt because it is getting so hot. Please, if you don’t want me to get burned, then dont spam the chat.

            kill yourself you fatass 3xl beluga whale bitch

              From a Taylor Swift fan response towards a Swifty hater on Twitter.

              kill yourself you fatass 3xl beluga whale bitch, you oversized cunt whore. Your mom needs to shove a tampon up her bloody vag and leave it in there for a week so she can get toxic shock syndrome and die, worthless bitch, we know her loose ass vag needs the extra heavy and thick tampons anyways be the heavy flow bloody pig got her pussy swollen by birthing your fat head ass. You need to go get swept away by the tide and drown to death or get mauled by piranhas. You disgusting revolting foul vile faced cunt. You look like if Matt smith was mixed with a leprechaun. You need to shove a rod up your dirty stinky poop stained asshole and have it regurgitate out your throat and rip all your organs inside out then you need to be flayed alive. I hope you get bussy lice from that dildo we know you shove up your hole every night fugly twink. Or better yet, let's send you to Dubai to stone you for being a fuggot. You need to be exterminated from society. Make a voodoo doll of yourself and cross stitch it so you can die painfully. We would get more value decomposing you back into our soil than let you waste our air. I hope some tribe people use you for a sacrificial ritual and eat your heart alive and then decapitate your head and mount it on a spike on your loose vag whOre sivt mom's front porch so see can die of grief and burn in hell with her pedo son. I hope maggots eat your dick and balls and then they tear plant eggs inside you which hatch and eat your intestines alive. I hope a bear shows up to your house and claws you to death, cunt. You smell like wet ear wax and pennies so clean yourself with bleach you foul scented white twink