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I can’t take it anymore. I’m sick of Flutterpage.

    By u/matsuku, its the Xiangling copypasta but changed to FLutterpage from Reverse: 1999.

    I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Flutterpage. I try to play 37. My Flutterpage deals more damage. I try to play Lilya. My Flutterpage deals more damage. I try to play Hissabeth. My Flutterpage deals more damage. I want to play poison. Their best team has Flutterpage. I want to play Dynamo. Ulrich's best psychube is Flutterpage's. I want to play Windsong and Liang Yue. They all want Flutterpage.

She grabs me by the throat. I farm Dusts and Sharpodonties for her. I maxes out her psychube. I give her P1. She isn't satisfied. I pull Ezio. "I don't need this much Resonances" She tells me. "Give me more FuA so I can get Eurekas." She grabs J and forces him to burn his hp off. "You just need to funnel me more. I can deal more damage with Fatutu."

I can't pull for Fatutu, I don't have enough Unilogs. She grabs my credit card. It declines. "Guess this is the end." She grabs Nautika. She says "Nautika, get them." There is no hint of sadness in her eyes. Nothing but constant +% crit, bonus genesis damage and +1AP. What a cruel world.

    Shit man, this wizard war is fucked.

      AKA ‘wizardposting’ the original is from a wizard shitpost from Tumblr before been adopted by other communities. 

      Shit man, this wizard war is fucked. I just saw a guy clap his hands together and say "the ten hells" or some similar shit, and every one around him turned inside out, had their tibia explode and then disappeared. The camera didn't even go onto him, that's how common shit like this is. My ass is casting frostbite and level 2 poison. I think I just heard "power word:scrunch" two groups over. I gotta get the fuck outta here.

      Warhammer 40K version

      Shit man, this uprising is fucked. I just saw a shard of god clap his hand together and say "drain life" or some similar shit, and everyone around him turned inside out, had their blood drained, and exploded. My Leader didn't even notice that's how common this shit is. My ass is shooting a pipe) gun, and rocking a 60 year old mining outfit. I think I just heard "Phaeron of the Stars" two groups over. I gotta get the fuck out of here.

      Umamusume: Pretty Derby

      Shit man, this Arima Kinen is fucked. I just saw an uma clap her hands together and say Mystifying Murmur some similar shit, and every one around her became Rushed, ran out of Stamina and became glue. The camera didn't even go onto her, that's how common shit like this is. My ass is procing Super-Duper Stoked and level 1 Extra Tank . I think I just heard Behold Thine Emperor's Divine Might two positions over. I gotta get the fuck outta here.

      Naruto

      Shit man, this ninja war is fucked. I just saw a guy clap his hands together and say "atomic dismantling jutsu" or some similar shit, and every one around him was trapped in a glowing cube, exploded into dust and then disappeared. The sensory types didn't even look at him, that's how common shit like this is. My ass is using beast mimicry and fang over fang. I think I just heard "ninja art: scrunch" two groups over. I gotta get the fuck outta here.

      Lancer Deltarune – Darkner war

      Shit man, this Dark World is fucked. I just saw a guy clap his hands together and say "IT'S TV TIME!" or some similar shit, and every one around him was playing a minigame and earning points. There wasn't even a tutorial, that's how common shit like this is. My ass is using Bikey and Lancer Cookies. I think I just heard "YOUR TAKING TOO LONG" two groups over. I gotta get the fuck outta here. 
      My ass is casting splat noise and tier two swear word. I think I just heard "Watch what happens when I cast a spell I don't know!" two groups over. I gotta get the $!$! outta here.

      I only listen to FLACs

        [copypasta] I only listen to FLACs
        byu/pasquyno inaudiojerk

        By u/pasquyno, its a circlejerk of the audiophiles and how different audio formats are discussed.

        I only listen to FLACs. I honestly don't get how you guys can listen to MP3s and not get nauseated by the low quality, even at 320kbps you can hear the compression from over a mile away, I only listen to 1k+ kbps FLACs ripped from REAL CDs, remember those? Compact Discs? Yeah I still use those, none of that compressed streaming bullshit will ever touch my 10000 dollar (yes 1 with four zeroes) audiophile setup, I personally find songs that are not WAV or FLAC unlistenable and am honestly disgusted by people who say otherwise, you plebs keep your mp3s and your m4as, while I get to listen to the best quality music, knowing that even the lowest of sub-bass (down to 1Hz!) will never get cut out, I have no idea if you've ever experienced FLAC music to its fullest, I'd guess you never did because you plebs could never afford such a setup, but when you DO listen to it, you can hear the air between the instruments, the guitar strings crackling against the tabs and even the littlest imperfections in the singer's voice, really feeling the warmth from the music and having a surreal experience, unless you're like me and used to it by now (kind of impossible), I kind of feel sorry for you guys that will never get to experience FLAC music or anything remotely like it in the next 100 years, remember, if you don't have a setup that costs at least 1000 dollars, you are NOT listening to the music, you're only hearing somewhat musical noises with a ton of compression

        I found the perfect way to explain my gender.

          @bpdeer

          I hope my oomf sees this she had to deal with his weirdo ass too ：#discord #averagediscordmod #2021 #sydznet ：

          ♬ original sound – SYD🧟‍♂️ 
          I found the perfect way to explain my gender. So. I watched a play through of that new Your Boyfriend game and I finally realised what I want my gender to be perceived as. Creepy ass COMPLETELY unhinged weirdo stalker but also kinda cute looks innocent enough that u would let ur guard down around them and they would kidnap u. So. Maybe yanderegender? But yk I can’t call it that bc yandere is a uh… an ableist term.. which is rlly embarrassing for me considering my tt username is yanderemishima and idk what to change it to but anyways that’s my gender. Creepy weird sadistic pervert but also just a cute lil guy :3. Yk. That probably doesn’t make sense but that’s it. That’s the gender.

          You have made a massive mistake

            AKA ‘Free art copypasta‘ its from a DM someone sent to an artist on Twitter for refusing to do a collage for free.

            You have made a massive mistake. Doing this for me would have made you a symbol in the world of intellect and literature. It is so typical for someone like you to forget this. It is so typical for someone like you to use abbreviated words. I was prepared to open your world to my knowledge and share my stories and art, with you. You will forever regret the choice you just made, so I will offer to let you do this project again. If you do not, you will have to face the consequences.

            TIFU: Losing my Virginity to a Water Slide

              Moral of the story: Keep your damn legs crossed on waterslides.
              source

              By u/Skylantech to the r/tifu sub, its a story on how he got an enema from a waterslide by not crossing his legs.

              So do you guys know those waterslides that you stand in, and then they suddenly drop you straight down onto the water slide? If not, look them up on YouTube, there's nothing like them.

Ah yes, the sweet memories of my first time on one of these. I feel that my mental/emotional scars have healed enough to tell this gem.

At the time my girlfriend, now Fiancée, worked as a photographer for one of those resorts with the indoor and outdoor water parks. One of her perks was that her and a family member/friend could get into the waterpark for free, so one hot summer day she had off and we both decided it'd be fun to go there and cool down for the day.

While we were there, I discovered one of there most "Thrilling" looking waterslides. Basically you stand in this tube, and then the slide operator presses a button and this slide drops you straight down a good 90 FEET, before you actually start going down the water slide. Me, being a thrill seeker, of course had to try it. So I made the great climb up to the top of the slide, stood in line, and finally it was my turn. Once I got in the tube, the operator told me to keep my legs crossed. Now I'm a pretty big heavy guy, so I was like "That's uncomfortable as fuck, I'm not doing that". So there I was standing in the tube, having a panic attack from anticipation, with my legs not crossed. The operator finally presses the button, the bottom opens and I fall straight down the water slide. Very quickly I realized why they have you cross your legs. Water shot so far up my ass, so fast, I swear I tasted it in my mouth. My body raced down that slide, as I questioned every life choice that I have ever made.

Once I made it to the bottom, I sat there for a moment, absolutely violated. I felt like someone in an episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. I built up the courage to finally stand up, and all I could feel was the nice warm stream of water mixed with shit, and maybe a little bit of blood shoot out of my ass faster than the Steamboat Geyser at Yellowstone National Park. I quickly got off the slide and ran to the bathroom, with a trail of shitty water tailing me as the slide operator stared in awe. They had to shut down the slide for the rest of the day :'), but man was my asshole clean after that!

Moral of the story: Keep your damn legs crossed on waterslides.