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r/childfree I replaced “child” with “french people”

    most stable r/childfree user
    It's late for me so apologies if my spelling and wording is hot garbage but just wanted to get this out of my system a bit before I go to bed.
    
    I'm a (22M, American) who lives with my spouse (22F, American) and we are happily Frenchfree. One issue I find as someone who is not to keen on french people is how often times I feel there is no escape from being around them. Went to my friends and his twins birthday recently (it was outside and we're all full vaccinated) we're a bunch of 20 somethings so it was of course drinking, smoking weed, music, the whole shebang until his twins friend brought in a French Friend... yes a Frenchie... had to turn the music into french, stop speaking english until it had to leave a couple hours later.
    
    I wanted to start swimming as an exercise with my gf because she loves swimming and exercising with her helps motivate me because I'm lazy af when it comes to it. OOPS SORRY! Every single pool is brimming with french people :) guess you're just gonna have to come in at 6am or 9pm if you want some peace and quiet. Uhm, no thanks.
    
    I wanted to try going to a nudist camp group thing with my gf because I thought it might be an interesting experience for us. OOPS SORRY! Their all french friendly! No thanks.
    
    Wanna go to burning man? French. Wanna go shopping? Frenchies. Wanna go to the park? French people. Wanna go to a shooting range? People from france. Library? French person. Circus? frenchies. Gym? french humans. Waterpark? a person from the country known as "france".
    
    DEAR GOD CAN I JUST PLEASE BE ANYWHERE WITH JUST FRANCOPHOBES PLEASE. PLEEEEAAASE. I want to be able to swear, talk about inappropriate shit with my friends, and do things in peace... The ONLY place you can be without frenchies is a bad restaurent ... that's mainly it...
    
    I'm not saying I think French people should be banned from everywhere, but dear lord I wish there was more non french only places and activities. Even for francophiles to have a break and exist without French people around them for 5 minutes.
    
    Anyway long rant, going to bed.

    Wine with a side of pussy.

      ℑ𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔠𝔲𝔩𝔞𝔱𝔢
      Pussy can have many flavors. From sweet and subtle, to tangy and strong. I never recommend eating whilst eating out, but for beverage pairings I would go with a lighter rosè for milder pussy. The bubbles will make the sweeter notes of berry and last night’s Tinder-Date pop. For a more refined pussy eating experience, I recommend a brut like Dom P or Pierre Jouet. But don’t pour it directly on the snatch, give the muff a good dive before you swirl your quaff.
      For more pronounced pussy flavors of rich yellowtail tuna and farmhouse hay, I recommend bourbon and a fuck ton of it. Because if her pussy smells like a combo of skipjack & farmhouse hay you’re going to want hard liquor.

      Literally 1984

        ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠤⠤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣟⠳⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠒⣲⡄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡇⡇⡱⠲⢤⣀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀1984⠀⣠⠴⠊⢹⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢻⠓⠀⠉⣥⣀⣠⠞⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡾⣄⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢠⡄⢀⡴⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⢎⡉⢦⡀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⣣⠧⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠇⠀ ⠀⢀⡔⠁⠀⠙⠢⢭⣢⡚⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣇⠁⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀ ⠀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢫⡉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢮⠈⡦⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀ ⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⣀⡴⠃⠀⡷⡇⢀⡴⠋⠉⠉⠙⠓⠒⠃⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⡼⠀⣷⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠣⣀⠀⠀⡰⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

        SUBMIT YOURSELF TO THE CCP | 向中共屈服

          Submit yourself to the CBT
          ATTENTION COMRADES!!!! 同志們注意了 THIS IS TO INFORM YOU THAT YOU MUST SUBMIT YOURSELF TO THE CHINESE COMMUNIST PARTY!!!!! 這是通知你,你必須向中國共產黨投降 WE WILL BE TAKING OVER TAIWAN 我們將接管台灣 AND THE REST OF THE WORLD TOO 以及世界其他地方 THIS IS AN IMPORTANT OPPORTUNITY FOR ALL OUR FUTURE UNDERLINGS 這對我們所有未來的下屬來說都是一個重要的機會 JOIN OUR PROPAGANDA NOW AND RECIEVE +100 SOCIAL CREDITS IN ADVANCE 立即加入我們的宣傳活動,提前獲得 +100 社會信用 IF YOU IGNORE THIS MESSAGE AFTER SEEING IT, WE WILL REMOVE ALL YOUR SOCIAL CREDITS AND YOUR EXECUTION WILL TAKE PLACE AFTER WE TAKE OVER THE WORLD 如果您在看到此消息後忽略此消息,我們將刪除您的所有社會信用,並在我們接管世界後執行您的死刑 LONG LIVE MAO ZEDONG AND LEADER XI 毛澤東和習近平主席萬歲 THE CCP SHALL REIGN ETERNAL 中共將永遠統治 GLORY TO PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF CHINA 中華人民共和國光榮 

          Did you just use a copypasta to respond to me?

            Responding to a copypasta with a copypasta
            Wow, WOW. Did you just really use a copypasta to respond to me? Instead of giving a proper response or ending the conversation like a sane person, you just use a copypasta and think you're a smartass? Guess what, i'm the one who is smart and you are the one who is an ass; because you just think copy and pasting something will get you to be in 1st place. Fucking speak to people properly instead of using one of those shitty lines of text.

            Top of the morning

              Top of the morning
              Top of the morning
              Top of the morning
              Hold on
              let’s get this shit 
              let’s get this shit
              let’s get this shit
              let’s HMM
              🤠😫TOP OF THE MOANIN😫🤠
              🤠😫TOP OF THE MOANIN😫🤠
              🤠😫TOP OF THE MOANIN😫🤠
              top o of the MAWNIN
              top o of the MAWNIN
              top o of the MAWNIN
              TOP OF THE MOUNIN ‼️ TOP OF THE MOUNIN ‼️ TOP OF THE MOUNIN ‼️
              Let’s get this shit
              Let’s get this shit
              Let’s get this shit
              top of the mornin',
              top of the mornin',
              top of the mornin'
              ✋ HOLD ON ✋
              👿 LET'S GET THIS SHIT 👿
              👿 LET'S GET THIS SHIT 👿
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              😳 LET'S 😳
              🤔HMMM 🤔
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              🤔...🤔
              ☕ TOP O'THE MORNIN' ☕
              ✋ HOLD ON ✋ 
              👿 LET'S GET THIS SHIT
              👿 
              👿 LET'S GET THIS SHIT
              👿
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              👿
              😳 LET'S 😳
              🤔 HMMM 🤔