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I propose to change the name of the game to “Book Producer Simulation”.

    By u/BigPapa9921, its a satirical post on how Europa Universalis V turns into a book management simulator due to the demand curve for books.

    The real challenge in EU5 isn’t learning the supply demand cycle, or figuring out whether levies or regulars are better, or understanding how the fucking frontage works. It’s not about juggling coalitions or keeping a vassal swarm alive. It’s not trying to raise crown power without collapsing your nation.
    
    The real challenge is BOOK PRODUCTION for fucks sake.
    
    Everything is going well. Economy is good, techs are advancing, people and estates are happy.
    
    But then suddenly:
    
    MISSING GOODS (BOOKS)
    
    No matter what I do, I cannot satisfy my people's endless, unholy love for reading. I’ve got scriptoriums everywhere, from my 3,000 person village to my 150,000 population big-ass city.
    
    My people won’t shut up, they’re all demanding to read “Agricultural Techniques for Idiots (1410 Edition) VOL III.” in their own obscure local dialect.
    
    And I can’t provide it.
    
    What am I, a bad king?
    
    Are the clerics in my scriptoriums writing one page every three months? Why aren’t they working?
    
    No, no.
    
    The real problem is those bastard goblin BURGHERS.
    
    The moment I produce books, before they reach my people, the Burghers snatch them away and brag:
    
    “Bro I sold all your books to the Lithuania for 0.02 ducats profit each. Guess I’m a trade genius huh?”
    
    Universities are starving, libraries are empty. They are all screaming
    
    "Sire, we cannot “think”. The Burghers sold our textbook"
    
    "Milord, we finished an whole sentence in just one week, but those Burghers took it from us"
    
    I’m not ruling an empire anymore.
    
    All I do is library management.
    
    My life goal now is to keep the medieval PDF industry alive.
    
    Millions must read, millions must become literate...
    

    Arteezy Riki backstab

      The original version came from Dota2 specifically during Arteezy’s run with Team Secret and the drama associated with him backstabbing EG. It has been adopted to other variation most notably LoL Shaco’s version.

      Dota2

      HEY RTZ, I’M TRYING TO LEARN TO PLAY RIKI. I JUST HAVE A QUESTION ABOUT THE SKILL BUILD: SHOULD I MAX BACKSTAB LIKE YOU BACKSTABBED EG, SMOKESCREEN SO THEY MISS ME LIKE EG MISS YOU 70% OF THE TIME, OR PERMANET INVISIBILITY SO I COULD DISAPPEAR LIKE YOU DISAPPEARED FROM EG 
      HEY RTZ, I’M TRYING TO LEARN TO PLAY RIKI. I JUST HAVE A QUESTION ABOUT THE SKILL BUILD: SHOULD I MAX BACKSTAB LIKE YOU BACKSTABBED EG, SMOKESCREEN SO THERE'S    325  AOE  DRAMA  AROUND  YOU, OR  BLINK  STRIKE  LIKE  THE  WAY  YOU  BLINKED  BACK  TO  EG  AFTER  THEY  HAD  WON  TI

      LoL

      HEY DOUBLELIFT, I’M TRYING TO LEARN TO PLAY SHACO. I JUST HAVE A QUESTION ABOUT THE SKILL BUILD: SHOULD I MAX BACKSTAB LIKE YOU BACKSTABBED CLG, DECEIVE LIKE YOU DECEIVED CLG, OR HALLUCINATE LIKE YOU MADE CLG HALLUCINATE ABOUT HAVING A CHANCE AT WINNING ANOTHER TOURNAMENT
      HEY IMAQTPIE, I’M TRYING TO LEARN TO PLAY SHACO. I JUST HAVE A QUESTION ABOUT THE SKILL BUILD: SHOULD I MAX BACKSTAB LIKE YOU BACKSTABBED DIG, DECEIVE LIKE YOU DECEIVED DIG, OR HALLUCINATE LIKE YOU MADE DIG HALLUCINATE ABOUT HAVING A CHANCE AT WINNING A TOURNAMENT

      Valorant

      Comment
      byu/ValorantCompBot from discussion
      inValorantCompetitive
      Hey valyn, I'm trying to learn to play Yoru. I just have a question about the buy, should I buy Fakeout like you faked JonahP out of the G2 roster, Blindside like you blindsided JonahP when you dropped him, or buy a ghost like you ghosted JonahP 

      kyle lowry ain’t no spot up shooter he aint gotta run to the corner to shoot like hes some 3rd option bitch this aint jj redick

        Comment
        byu/DemarDerozan4MVP from discussion
        innba

        Originated from a comment in a post about Kyle Lowry’s shot chart. The person’s account has now been deleted but not before their comment became a legendary NBA meme.

        kyle lowry ain't no spot up shooter he aint gotta run to the corner to shoot like hes some 3rd option bitch this aint jj redick this is a fuckin god human steph curry come again only this time hes not a fuckin pussy pull up from the fuckin logo and fight you at the same time
        kyle lowry 🍑 ain't no spot up shooter 🏀 he aint gotta run 🏃🏿‍♂️ to the corner to shoot 🎆 like hes some 3rd option bitch 💯 this aint jj redick 🙆🏻‍♂️ this is a fuckin god🙏🏼 human steph curry 🥘 come again only this time hes not a fuckin pussy 🐱 pull up from the fuckin logo and fight you 👊🏿 at the same time

        As a Battledad, this is out of line

          Comment
          byu/moist-smegma4827 from discussion
          inokbuddyptfo
          As a Battledad, this is out of line. When I've taken the time to tactically ascertain the situation I am objectively performing the optimal strategic manoeuvre.
          
          Take City of Cairo, if I get a single second to breathe (unlikely), I am able to perform my strategic mindset and this is what happens... I choose to run in a zig-zag formation, I halt in the middle of the road to absorb the full spectrum of tactical information around me, slowly discerning the next optimal strategic movement that will make up for my slowing reflexes as a 31 year old with a full time job and family responsibilities. 
          
          As I'm absorbing the full spectrum of information, I am interrupted midway through by an assault player with an SMG sliding around a corner opening up on me with full auto at over 5m distance (which an SMG should be useless at). I start turning the rotation handle on my squeaky Light Machine Gun turret rotating at maximum efficiency for a man of my age. I manage to fire off a single burst which should either immediately suppress him making it impossible for him to hit me, or dealing significant damage. Instead... he jumps ... striking me five times with his SMG and forcing me to go directly to the forums to discuss this unsportsmanlike cheating behaviour. 
          
          This would never have happened in battlefield 3. 

          There is genuinely nothing on this godforsaken website that makes me want to throw my laptop out a window more than programming memes.

            By u/Consistent_Equal5327, it was a rant on low effort programmer humor in Reddit. The original post had been removed by mods but the rant was copy and pasted in the comment and r/copypasta sub.

            There is genuinely nothing on this godforsaken website that makes me want to throw my laptop out a window more than programming memes. I'm talking seething, irrational hatred.
            
            "Spent 6 hours debugging, it was a missing semicolon haha"
            
            WHICH FUCKING COMPILER ARE YOU USING THAT DOESN'T TELL YOU THIS IMMEDIATELY? Show me. I want receipts. Every compiler since the dawn of time will scream at you "EXPECTED SEMICOLON ON LINE 23 YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKFACE" the second you try to run it. Your IDE is highlighting it in red. Your linter is having an aneurysm. How is this supposed to be relatable?
            
            "Haha I can't exit Vim"
            
            Oh fuck off. Fuck ALL the way off. You know what every terminal has? A CLOSE BUTTON. An X in the corner. Alt+F4. Task manager. You have OPTIONS. And even if you wanted to do it properly, :q takes literally one second to Google. This is besides the fucking fact that any of those guys will never ever use vim.
            
            "JavaScript == vs ===" with some galaxy brain meme
            
            This is in every single JavaScript tutorial ever written. This is not obscure knowledge. This is page 1 of learning the language. Why are we acting like this is some mind-blowing gotcha?
            
            "Works perfectly for months, adds one comment, everything breaks"
            
            NO IT DOESN'T. COMMENTS DON'T BREAK CODE. THAT'S NOT HOW COMPUTERS WORK. Unless you're writing in some fucked up esolang, comments are ignored. This literally cannot happen.
            
            These are just examples I can think of at the moment. But all of them are near same stupidty.
            
            The thing that drives me absolutely fucking insane is that these memes get THOUSANDS of upvotes. THOUSANDS. And they're not funny. They're not relatable. They're not even based in reality. They're just the same tired bullshit regurgitated by people who either don't actually code or learned everything they know from other memes.
            
            For something to be funny it needs to have SOME connection to actual reality. I hate them so much. Every time I see one I age 5 years. My blood pressure spikes.
            
            I keep seeing them. Every day. Same jokes. Different template. Over and over and over like some kind of hell specifically designed for me.
            
            Anyway I'm going back to debugging. It's 2 AM and I can't find the missing semicolon (in Python btw).

            Q400

              Written by u/SDPoop, its known as the Q400 rant or Dash 8 Q400 copypasta by aviation enthusiasts similar to the CRJ200 rant.

              Congratulations on picking a great big fucking turd to fly! Make no mistake, the Q400 is just a god awful airplane. I think what I hate most about it is the air conditioning - When the bleeds aren't sending smoke from burning oil into the cabin (this is an alarmingly regular occurrence), the ACMs simply do a terrible job regulating the temperature in automatic mode, and if you put them in manual, moving the knob the width of a hair will roast you or freeze you. Every time you change power settings down in the 10-40% torque range the bleeds change from 2.2 - 2.7 - 3.0 making the airflow erratic and noisy and very distracting and very very fucking irritating. Also, if you shut the airplane down without the pack knobs in the 12 o'clock position, wherever you left them will become the new "12 o'clock" next time you turn them on. Obviously this is a huge fucking annoyance and it usually requires you to completely shut off the packs to reset the ECS, which unless you want to lose pressurization, you had better do on the ground and if you forget, have fun being either freezing or sweltering for the whole flight. My second least favorite part of this POS is the brakes... Holy. Shit. Stopping this airplane is frustrating at best from the cockpit, and downright traumatizing as a passenger. Don't make the mistake of assuming that like other airplanes, when you apply a normal amount of pressure to the tops of the pedals, something will happen. This is not the case. Instead, you will have to use almost the ENTIRE WEIGHT OF YOUR BODY on the pedals, and then wait several seconds, and then you will feel yourself slowing. This, of course, is just to slow down from a normal 15-20kt taxi, so plan ahead when you're taxiing. In order to slow down on landing, you will need to apply the brakes immediately; whatever you do, don't wait until you need them because they need to heat up in order to do anything (I am aware that this is the case with most airplanes with carbon brakes, but the q400's brakes are an EXTRA special case). So after applying a significant amount of pressure, that you are hoping isn't enough to lock them up, you will wait several seconds and feel no deceleration due to the brakes. You will then apply a tiny bit more pressure, only to find that that was WAY TOO MUCH AND NOW THEY ARE GRABBING ASYMMETRICALLY AND YOU ARE LURCHING BACK AND FORTH AND EVERYONE IN THE BACK IS PULLING THEIR CRUSHED FACES OUT OF THE SEATBACKS IN FRONT OF THEM AND LOOKING AROUND AT THE OTHERS, SILENTLY BUT FRANTICALLY EXCHANGING "oh my god holy shitfuck is this normal or are we mere seconds away from perishing in a smoldering heap?" GLANCES and then it's finally over and you can breathe again. After a few months on the airplane I realized that I had no idea how to give a braking action report anymore because it is literally "poor" every single time a Q400 lands, so now I just say fair every time I'm asked because that's the most conservative thing to do and it's probably actually at least fair to every other transport category aircraft that has ever been produced. The logic in the cockpit layout is really shitty too... I'm sure you've noticed that there is only ONE set of controls for TWO MFD's. Who the fuck thought of that, huh? Granted, most of the time there's no need to have the doors page and the fuel page up simultaneously, and it's a damn good thing because YOU FUCKING CAN'T unless you cycle through the pages in just the right way (think solving a rubix cube) because the DIPSHIT that designed this airplane was a lazy fucking cunt and only put one set of buttons on the pedestal. And what other airplane makes you specifically ask it to level off at the altitude you spun into the window? WHY THE FUCK ELSE DID I PUT THAT ALTITUDE THERE IF IT WASN'T BECAUSE I WANTED TO STOP THERE? There is NO reason for the ALT SEL button but at least if you're not a moron it's not a big deal. Oh and did you know that there isn't actually a yaw damper on this airplane? I know there is a button on the FGC to engage it but did you know that it's not actually connected to anything? Just kidding. I have been told that there is in fact a yaw damper on the Q400 and you can't use the autopilot if it doesn't work, but you sure could have fooled me because it doesn't do a FUCKING thing. You're gonna love swinging the tail back and forth trying to keep the brick centered Every. Single. Time. you change power or pitch. Most people just fly around uncoordinated and some people use differential power to keep it coordinated so they don't have to touch the EXTREMELY sensitive rudder pedals/trim, but your airline may not like that because supposedly splitting the power like that wreaks havoc on the ANVS and makes it fail a lot faster. This thing is awful in turbulence. And guess what? Since you can't go above FL250, you are gonna feel all of it hahahaha. And don't even think about asking how the ride ahead is, because nobody else is flying at your altitude! Don't keep your feet on the floor when it gets bumpy because as soon as you hit a nasty one they will fly up and you will bust the fuck out of your shins on the sharp lower edge of the panel. The corners of the pedestal are sharp too, so especially watch out for your knee by the FMS because that fucking hurts too if you bump it. Guess what else? Probably the very same STUPID DIPSHIT that designed the rest of the cockpit thought it'd be really smart to house the windshield wipers horizontally, instead of vertically like every other fucking airplane. So now, thanks to that ASSCLOWN, you get to hear every single knot of wind over the wiper blades and this airplane is loud as shit to begin with (admit it: you thought the Q stood for quiet didn't you. It's ok, I thought so too. It actually stands for "quite motherfucking loud still despite what we've told you so bring a good headset bitch"). Luckily, you can park them vertically with the wiper control but this is officially "frowned upon" at my airline so some crews may not feel "comfortable" doing it. I feel much more uncomfortable listening to the torrent of wind hitting the blades than breaking a silly rule that nobody will ever find out about, but some people are different. Oh, and the clamshell door. Nothing quite like sitting around not getting paid for 10 minutes after you hand out the paperwork because you're waiting for the rampers to move the jet bridge so you can close the door. On the other hand, if you want to make up that 10 minutes and more, just start the APU with the batteries off. Then you can sit for 20min- a half hour with the door closed waiting for the loads to come down to .10. Want to cancel a flight and go home? Spin the baro knob all the way down as far as it will go. That will break the CPC for some reason and make it show "FAULT." That's a gamble though because you don't want them to just end up deferring the CPC and making you do it yourself in manual mode because that's a great big nuisance. Good luck and enjoy missing commute after commute because these things are held together by spit!