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Um..uh hi… *waves shyly*

    Notices you in the distances and smells your ovulation/period/ fertility/clit I transform into a black-furred werewolf bear dragon and my voice gets deep like a black men's voice (not in a racist way) and my balls get very furry like pictures a white furry Guinea pig and my cock gets so large and huge and very big because it's massive and veiny and cum is already cumming out of it. My eyes change color depending how horny I am (red if I'm super horny and red if I'm chill) I go through the Amazon rainforest, jump over mount Everett, build homes for poor colored people, punch every trump supporter in the gut, cross the dessert and we have sex which is very nice

    Cinco de Mayo

      HOLA👋🏻 all you dirty little TACO🌮SLUTS😘🤣do you know what day it is?!🤔 I smell immigrants🙎🏾‍♂️🙋🏽‍♂️ and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION🙅🏼 so it must be SINKO DE FUCKING MAYONNAISE😩💦🍻🌮❤️🌯 Hide your KIDS👨‍👩‍👧‍👦, hide your BURRITOS🌯, and get your CUMMIES READY😩cause DADDY TRUMP🇧🇪is coming to deport us all🤷🏽‍♂️🙆🏾 But DONT FORGET to drink TACOS 🌮 and eat TEQUILA 🍸because the only way for you FILTHY CUMSLUTS to stay in America🇺🇸is to PARTYYY🎈🎉🎁😍💦😩 So send this to CINCO(5 you dumb bitch) of the SLUTTIEST😏 jars of MAYO you know and if you DONT ❌get any back you get NO 🚫🚫CULTURAL CUMMIES 😭🤷🏽‍♂️🌮💦😩
      It's Cinco de mayo... 👀🌮🎉 but all I want 🙏🏻 is cinco DICKS 🌯 in my May-OUTH 😩👅💦 Today the SEXicans 😍🇲🇽 beat the French 😒🇫🇷 at the Battle of Puebla 🔫☠ and now you're gonna get your piñata beat 😜😩 with a huge stick 😳🎉 but ❗️ONLY❗️ if you send 📲 this to 5️⃣ amigos 👬 you'd cross borders ➡️ for 👌🏻💯 Get 5️⃣ back 🔙 and you'll find the Juan for you tonight ❤️☺️😘
      It’s the end of May the Fourth 4️⃣ 🌌😫 but that means the beginning of 🎸👨🏾🌵CincHOE de Mayo 🎸👨🏾🌵 get ready to get your TACO eaten 👅💦🌮 and gulp Papi's BURRITO 😩🌯💦 send this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of your main 💅🏾PUTAS 💅🏾who need to be stuffed by a CHORIZO 🌭💦 if you get 5️⃣ back you're a border hopping 💁🏽CHOLA 💁🏽If you get 1️⃣0️⃣ back you're a 💚 Green card HOE💚 If you get 1️⃣5️⃣ back you're the💃🏽Telenovela main BITCH 💃🏽 If you get 0️⃣ back you're getting deported by Trump! 🇲🇽😫🚧🇺🇸 Have a happy CincHOE de Mayo and don't let la Migra get you!!
      It’s CincHOE🎉 de mayHOE😈😘but all I want 🙏🏻 is cinco🖐️5️⃣ DICKS 🌯🍆💦 in my May-OUTH 😩👅💦 Today the SEXicans 😍🇲🇽 beat the French 😒🇫🇷 at the Battle of Puebla 🔫☠ and now you’re gonna get your piñata beat 😜😩 Time to sink this Mexican🇲🇽 dick🍆 into that dirty😳 chihuahua pussy🐶 but❗️ONLY❗️ if you send 📲 this to 5️⃣ amigos 👬 you’d cross borders ➡️ for 👌🏻💯 Get 5️⃣ back 🔙 and you’ll find the Juan for you tonight ❤️☺️😘
      Happy 😉🍑 CINCO de 🎧 MAYHOE!! It’s 🅱🚫 time to 🏽 celebrate all 💦 things 👠 Mexican like GUACamole, 🥑🥑 MARiHUANAdoes, and 💦 El DICKcunTin ️ . Send this ☝⤴ to of 👶😂 your 💎 spiciest latina ass bitches 🍑💋 or 🎡😩 you ain’t MexiCUMMIED in the 👢🍗 face that 🚟 night 🌌 . If 👦 you ♀😧 get 🔟♂ back 😯🔙 , you 😍😫 ain’t spicy 😫 enough . Get 💦 back 😔 and 👅 you’re 😍😂 HOT as 😖 FUCK ️ back and 👑💰 you’ll 👈 get your 💸 CINCO on 🔛 thaaaaaaannnnnndddd be 🐝 getting DICKed down ⬇⬇ all night 🌝 long 😄♂

      May Day

        TWERKERS 👨‍💻👷of the world 🌍escape from your BONDAGE ⛓️🪢Today 📅📅📅 is MAY DAY 👷❗️❗️👷 Most people 👥👥 are forced to work 🔨📞💻 for BOSS DADDY who steals all the CUMMIES 💦 💲💹💹🏧 of their labor but I would work 🔨📞💻 for YOU 👦 👧 because YOU’RE MY CUMRADE 💪👬👭💂❗️❗️ TODAY is the day to JOIN your working clASS 🍑UNION 👭and fight for your right to the fruits 🍎 of your LABEWHORE 🔨. Send 📨📧 to 10 AnarcHO FEMENISTS 👯‍♀️who appreciate 😊👍 your LABOR 🔨🔧 or be EXPLOITED 💵💰🚨🚓 by the BOURGEOISIE 🚬🔫🔪💸💸💸 If you get 0️⃣ back you are a BOOT 👢 licking scab 🩹. If you get 5️⃣back you are a SEXY 🍆CUMMUNIST 🎅. If you get 🔟 back you are a BOMB BUSSY 💣 throwing ANARCHO-sHOcialist! ⚒️💣🍆

        My son is a furry.

          My son told me today he is a furry. He was sent away and we searched his room. His Google Chrome history was full of this group. I have seen unholy drawings and sick jokes that he posts here. We found a folder full of pornographic comics and something called based department. This group has destroyed my son. His mind is filled with naked animals. Groups like this need to be shut down and banned. That's all. Took me an hour to figure out how to post here - I hope you read this and see the lives you destroy. We will be having a VERY stern chat with him and he's not going to have social media access for a LONG time.

          Twitter Bunny Ears

            ⢀⡤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⡏⠀⠀⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⠃⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⠃⠀⠘⢧⠀⠀ ⢸⡆⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠀⠀ ⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀ ⠈⣇⠀⠀⠀ ⣧⠀ ⠀⡏⠀⢦⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆ ⠀⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⢸⠇⠀⠘⢧⡀⠀⣸⠃ ⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⢸⡆ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⣼⠙⠋⠁⠀ 
            ⢀⡤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⢠⡏⠀⠀⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀   ⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀ 
⢸⠃⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠀⠀⠀  ⣼⠃⠀⠘⢧⠀⠀
⢸⡆⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆⠀⠀   ⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀
⠈⣇⠀⠀⠀   ⣧⠀   ⠀⡏⠀⢦⠀⠀⠀⠸⡆
⠀⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀     ⢸⠇⠀⠘⢧⡀⠀⣸⠃
⠀⠀⢳⠀⠀⠀⢸⡆     ⢸⠀⠀⠀⣼⠙⠋⠁⠀

            AITA For ripping my neighbors roof tiles off to satisfy my kink of putting roof tiles up my anus?

              I (54 M) live alone in a remote area. My new neighbor had moved in pretty recently, and i noticed they had begun construction on the house. All of the houses in my neighborhood had wooden roofs, although, the roof my neighbor was installing seemed odd. I looked it up and oh my god. Once i clicked on the images, i felt the blood rush to my little guy. It was as if i could cum on the spot. Their curviness, the terracotta color, everything was so erotic. I found myself touching my lower regions. I knew it was wrong, but it felt so good. The next day, my neighbors roof was still being installed. I had an excellent idea. I grabbed the latter from my garage and sneakily brought it over to their house. While avoiding the cameras and guard dogs, I climbed on top of their roof. Lord have mercy. I was dripping the second i saw those tiles in real life. No longer keeping my excitement, i began forcefully ripping off a few tiles. I needed to use them now. I couldnt wait. I pulled my pants down. You can guess what happened next by the title. I shoved 4 1/2 roof tiles up my anus. It felt so good. No woman or man had ever pleasured me like this. My moans and whimpers were so loud my neighbor eventually came out of his house to see cum dripping off his roof with 4 1/2 of his roof tiles shoved up my anus. He called the cops on me. They didnt want to touch me so they couldnt arrest me, right? That was my plan until one of the officers informed me their prison had roof tiles similar to the ones shoved up my anus. I got down and let them arrest me. Because the officers were so repulsed by the 4 1/2 roof tiles shoved up my anus, i went the whole drive to prison with 4 1/2 roof tiles shoved up my anus. I was charged with Public Nudity, Exposure To a Minor (my neighbors 4 year old daughter had seem me) and Indecency. Im now going to prison for 8 years. So, Reddit, am i the asshole?