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I showed osu! to a girl at work

    Originally from a post on r/osugame but has since become a meme and other variations of the pasta has been created.

    Osu

    She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the osu!demons inside me told me 'say it, Comfortable-Chip-740, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play rhythm games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a Big Black SS that I uploaded years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Balatro

    She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the madness joker inside me told me 'say it, Narso, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play rogue-like games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a Perkeo Baron Mime naninf 5 hour run that I uploaded months ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Old School Runescape

    I showed osrs to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the osrs demons inside me told me 'say it, Bwananabread, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play mmorpg games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a 500 invo ToA that I uploaded years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Guilty Gear

    I showed Strive to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really'

So the GGST demons inside me told me 'say it, mini_tagus, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play fighting games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found my EVO 2025 grand finals match that I uploaded to YouTube a year ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Bloons TD 6

    I showed BTD6 to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really'

So the BTD6 demons inside me told me 'say it, pinpunch, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play tower defense games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found my CHIMPS bloody puddles completion that I uploaded to YouTube a year ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Geometry Dash

    I showed Geometry Dash to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the GD demons inside me told me 'say it, ComicalSans1, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play rhythm games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a Blood Bath 100% that I uploaded years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'Geometry Dash isn't a rhythm game you idiot' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Brawl Stars

    I showed Brawl Stars to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah... nahh not really"

So the brawl stars demons inside me told me to 'say it, mRigged, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play Supercell games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess, so I quickly found a Power League Mortis Solo carry video that I uploaded years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool...!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyways I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely.

    Hypixel Skyblock

    I showed skyblock to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the skyblock demons inside me told me 'say it, ecylios, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play on hypixel skyblock, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a sub 4 f7 s+ run that I uploaded years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Chess

    I showed chess to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play board games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the chess demons inside me told me 'say it, sokuto_desu, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play chess, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a match that I uploaded years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Steins Gate

    I showed Steins;Gate to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you watch anime?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the S;G demons inside me told me 'say it, sokuto_desu, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I watch Steins;Gate, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found an episode that I watched years ago, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Class of ’09

    I showed Class of '09 to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really"

So the '09 demons inside me told me 'say it, UzumakiMadeIt, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play Class of '09, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found a playthrough of that one route with the pedo that I uploaded years ago, and she watched the full video in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    War Thunder

    I showed War Thunder to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really'

So the snail inside me told me 'say it, Romanian dude, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play war games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found the vid where an L3 gets brutally murdered, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    Five Nights at Freddy

    I showed Five Nights at Freddy’s to a girl at work

She came into work and was talking with me, and I randomly blurted out "so do you play games?" and she said "ah.. nahh not really'

So the bear inside me told me 'say it, animdude, tell her'. So I couldn't resist and I said 'I play horror games, do you want to see?' She reluctantly said 'oh yeah sure I guess', so I quickly found the vid where the bite of 87 happens, and she watched in horror.

Afterwards she was silent and said 'oh cool..!' and I didn't know what to say so I said 'yeah so that's me. Anyway I'll see you next week' and then I left work early to avoid having to explain myself

Hopefully by next time I see her she will have forgotten about my awkwardness completely

    I wake up screaming. Cold sweats. The warm feeling of urine soaked sheets and Hasan Piker themed pajama bottoms a result of the incessant stress ive been under.

      source
      I wake up screaming. Cold sweats. The warm feeling of urine soaked sheets and Hasan Piker themed pajama bottoms a result of the incessant stress ive been under.

Im still safe. The election hasn’t happened yet- theres still hope.

My trans wife and her nonbinary partner comfort me. “Another one?” Xir asks. “Yeah”

I get changed, head into the kitchen and make myself a soylent shake to wash down the lorazepam and triflupromazine Ive had to be on since 2016. I add a few shots of canola oil because its a heart healthy fat (I trust the science), and my doctor says Im malnourished and exceedingly underweight for being a 30 year old male.

Trump has made my life a living nightmare. Fascism won. I sit down legs crossed (in order to not perpetuate toxic masculinity by taking up too much space where women exist). Unable to sleep, my mind ruminates on the possibility of ending up in a camp around this time next year. I hope it never comes to that. She has to win.

      Insecure much? As a natural leader I can differentiate between those above and below me

        Its a reply by IronLead in a chat log from the game Psycho Patrol R. 

        Insecure much? As a natural leader I can differentiate between those above and below me with ease, you belong in the latter category. You could never say that to my face, only online, because my dominant physical presence would terrify you and you would naturally fall into your correct place. If we cross paths I will teach you to behave. You fucking piece of shit. Kill yourself.

        Please God, I want to impregnate Hecatia Lapislazuli so bad

          Please God, I want to impregnate Hecatia Lapislazuli so bad. I want her to bear my children with those beautiful child-bearing hips. That beautiful, radiant otherworldly angel. A goddess, having come down to Earth to cleanse us of our sins. Hecatia is beyond divine. I can’t help but drop to my knees in worship whenever I see her beautiful figure and the egirl clothes that she wears.

I yearn for her in a way both primal and spiritual. I would commit more war crimes than every president in United States history just to lick the sweet, glistening sweat from her smooth, creamy skin. I want to listen to her moans as my manhood throbs within her.

I want to hear her heart race as our bodies become one and our souls irreversibly intertwine in the holy sin of carnal union. I want to suckle at her motherly bosom, slurping that icy juice milk from her teat as she gently strokes my raging erection. I would stir her velvety Russian cream into my coffee and let my balls boil in it. Her cries of pleasure and the rocking of our bed would be louder than the cacophony of ten thousand drone strikes.

I would make love to her until my body gave out. I would let her break my rib cage with any part of her body. I would let her hit me with her car just to be near her for a brief moment. She’s so perfect it hurts. Every moment without her I suffer a pain worse than breaking every bone in my body simultaneously while drowning and also having shards of glass coated in hot sauce forced through every orifice of my body.

I want her, I need her. I want to desecrate her provocative yet enticing beautiful outfit. I want to start a family with her and retire after our twenty seven children have grown up and moved out. I want to see those luscious lips speak such filthy, perverse words into my ear while she abuses my pelvis. 😭😭😭😭😭

          STOP POSTING ABOUT LIKE A DRAGON!

            Among Us X Like A Dragon collab

            Its the “STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US!” meme but changed to Like A Dragon after the announcement of its collab with Among Us.

            STOP POSTING ABOUT LIKE A DRAGON! I’M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD IT’S FUCKING MEMES! I was in a server, right? and ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just Like A Dragon stuff. I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend and the logo I flipped it and I said “hey babe, when the underwear sus HAHA ROLLING EYES FALL, RULLING DIES OUT” I fucking looked at a trashcan and said “THAT’S MAJIMA EVERYWHERE” I looked at my balls I think of Saejima and I go “DICK OUT? MORE LIKE BALLS OUT” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

            There is no way Scissors is beating Paper!

              Started as a Reddit post, its satire of powerscaling discussions for shonen manga or anime.

              I'm not sure if you've been keeping up with Rock Paper Scissors but the author really wrote himself into a corner here. Right now Scissors is challenging Paper and we're honestly expected to believe Scissors has a chance? Scissors is honestly such a fucking fraud. They talk so much shit about his "sharp cutting edge" and "stainless steel" but he has literally won zero of his matches so far, only reaching a stalemate against other scissors.

In his fight with Rock two chapters ago we literally saw his ass get no-diffed. For those who don't know, Rock just stood there and Scissors tried to attack his weak point, but the attack did literally nothing. Like literally nothing, in fact we're told that Scissors managed to hurt HIMSELF even though he was trying to target Rock's weak point. He was literally crippled and unable to cut anymore after his encounter with Rock. Scissors is outscaled so hard it isn't even funny.

Then we see Rock get taken out in one shot by Paper. Rock couldn't even react to it - paper just strangled him from every direction at once. The power creep in this series is frankly unreal, but anyway. Paper literally attacks from EVERY direction at once, not even bothering to target Rock's weak points and Rock just couldn't handle it and was completely overwhelmed. And mind you we're told that Paper can contain any piece of information in the world. How is Scissors supposed to damage Paper? Rock couldn't get through even though Paper literally exposed his entire body to attack.

So anyway I think this is gonna be the most disappointing and predictable fight in history.

Edit: What the fuck. I was not expecting that to happen? I'm going to designate this as "Scissors post-tournament form" and scale his speed, durability and attack power higher than Paper.

Edit 2: How the hell did Scissors lose to Rock again? This author is fucking braindead. I swear this is why writers need to learn powerscaling.