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Official Statement Regarding My Mom.

    Official Statement Regarding My Mom.

Ok, I’m sorry for the off topic thread, but I feel like this needs to be said. Yesterday, at around 6:46 PM Eastern Time, a fellow redditoir in this sub- who I won’t name- claimed that they “slept with my mom”.

Let me get something straight. This anonymous redditoir didn’t sleep with my mom. In fact, none of you have ever and will never do something liek that. I know that for a fact.

So, please, nobody believe them. If you’ve seen the comment in question, just ignore them. Ok? Thanks

I’m sorry for derailing the chicanery but this needed to be said.

    I keep seeing Landorus-Therian everywhere and it’s ruining my life.

      Landorus-Therian
      Original post
      This post is a cry for help. I can’t stand this anymore. Everywhere I go, this stupid orange shitstain somehow finds me and ruins my life. No matter how many defense mechanisms I have, it always come back.

Yesterday, I was working at my job when I heard it. That fateful sound of a stat drop. I quickly leaped out of my chair and turned around, but the fucker had already used intimidate on all of my coworkers. I ran towards the bastard to punch him, but he set up stealth rocks in my cubicle, preventing me from working again. I quickly bolted to the office fridge to grab some ice cubes, but by the time I screamed “KYUREM USE ICE BEAM” the fucker had already u-turned out the window. I couldn’t work anymore because of the stealth rocks, so I had to leave so I could get a defog tm from my car.

As I grabbed the defog tm from my car, the thing jumped me from behind and used knock off, smacking the tm into the middle of the road. Before I could go grab it, a car raced by and crushed the tm, making it worthless. As I was standing there, shocked by what happened, the orange demon used earthquake on my car, giving me 4 flat tires simultaneously. Filled with rage, I grabbed a keldeo plush from my car, shoved a pair of spectacles onto its face, and hurled it at the thing, while screaming “KELDEO USE HYDRO PUMP.” Just like always, however, my hydro pump missed, and the fucker u-turned away again.

After I took a bus home, I was exhausted. As I was lying in my bed, depressed, my 6-year old daughter came into the room. She started talking about her favorite TV show, when suddenly, her face began to change. No. NO. As she continued talking, her face continued to morph, until it was identical to Landorus-Therian. I was ready this time, though. I quickly kicked off my shoes, revealing that I had duct-taped ice cubes to my feet. I then proceeded to triple axel the ever loving shit out of that thing. I looked up and screamed with joy, thinking it was all over. However, as I came to my senses, I saw my daughter unconscious on the floor and realized what I had done. The orange bastard had tricked me. My wife stood in the doorway, shocked, before she pulled out her phone and dialed 911. I’m writing this in the woods right now, the police are probably going to find me soon.

Fuck Landorus-Therian.

      Silky

        Silky is a demon in the SMT series
        Bro my ass could not survive the conception.

I mean, first off, everyone who wasn't in the Shinjuku medical center died in the conception, and I don't live anywhere near Shinjuku (which is apparently a real place? Must have been made as an SMT reference).

But if I did miraculously live to see the vortex world, I'd immediately start seeking out some sexy demons to try and negotiate with them. Maybe a Pixie, they're cute and all, but my dream would be a Silky.

They're so pretty. Tall and elegant, with long hair that flows gracefully down their back, held back by that nice little hat to keep it out of her face when she's cleaning. She has that simple yet beautiful old European style dress that is so modest I haven't got a clue what lies underneath (the mystery is part of the appeal).

I'd find one, walk up to her to begin negotiations and she'd say something like "So, how do you feel about cleaning?" To which I'd respond "I think it's very important and do it regularly." (Silky is a faerie that is associated with housekeeping and cleanliness, which is why I know she'd appreciate this answer, even if it's a lie).

But then she'd probably respond to me by saying something like "Then why don't you clean your guts off the floor?" Then break off negotiations. She'd immediately hit me with a physical attack, which would be kind of hot, except she'd hit me hard enough to break my skull in two and leave me dead on the ground.

        Packgod vs. Omegle Furry

          Packgod roast an Omegle Furry
          Source
          You need somebody to stand up right… to look you in your eyes… and for once… for ONCE… in your LIFE! To just tell you… TO SHUT THE FUCK UUUUUP!!!

Holy shit you’re annoying as hell if you don’t shut yo dirty disgusting dingy obtuse smelly insignificant musty bestiality promoting Zootopia meat beating parental guidance lacking hairline retracting dog leash wearing obnoxious butt crack sniffing computer mouse clicking genetically impaired insecure rambunctiously reactive peanut brain disastrous humanoid creation with yo avocado chin snapping turtle neck OIIIIII DONKEY! Your mom built like Shrek!

Packgod Fanboy?! Guess what? I don’t care about anything you just said you live in your family’s shed you got kicked out of special Ed 97.3% brain cells currently existing within your head are motherfucking dead, get yo ugly ass on boy yo family disowned you bitch, nationwide ain’t even on yo side I don’t wanna hear it infact yo parents kicked out out of the house and you started aggressively tapping the home button on your iPhone with yo boop boop boop boop “help why is it not working?” stop playing with me boy you're like if sully from Monsters Incorporated was a submissive femboy stop playing bruh you broke as hell too bruh you use a big mac wrapper as a blanket and a roll of toilet paper as a pillow with yo nasty ass.

MY CHROMOSOMES?! Bitch yo chromosomes were auto-generated by chatGPT generating noises I don't wanna hear it boy look at you bruh you like a level 14 skuntank with osteoporosis what is you saying bruh you and your father currently have a 1 bar bluetooth connection stop playing, why is you ballin up your fists like you finna fight me boy if we were to fight you'd bring a pair of wii nunchucks and start throwing Skylanders at me, stop playing.

guess what I caught you pole dancing for the three blind mice in the middle of a New York City subway you lookin like this: Oooooouup! uuuuuoooooo! You dumb as hell infact you thought hooters was a sacred clan of high ranking Kahoot players get yo ass on boy stop playing bruh your mom got robbed by a Make-A-Wish kid with a bent plastic spoon your uncle tried making a makeshift fleshlight out of a lubricated onion ring your grandfather got a parking ticket for sitting on a couch and your dad just got arrested by The Lorax for shaving his beard infact you sat on your dad’a wiener last night and started singing 🎵 Life is a highway, I’m gonna ride it all night long 🎵 who you talking to in that fursuit you think you’re iron man talking to Jarvis up in there “Jarvis fluff up my fur by 87% what is you doing- Get a girlfriend? Get yo what’s good sexy girl who told you to pass me looking this fine!!!! Shut up? Man you better get yo “Iraq, Croatia, Switzerland, Israel, let’s play football! Shut uuuuup! No one caaaaaares! No one aaaaaasked! You’re my bitch, bitch! Shut uuuuuuup! (He disconnected!)
          TO SHUT THE FUCK UUUUUP!!!

Holy shit you’re annoying as hell if you don’t shut yo dirty disgusting dingy obtuse smelly insignificant musty bestiality promoting Zootopia meat beating parental guidance lacking hairline retracting dog leash wearing obnoxious butt crack sniffing computer mouse clicking genetically impaired insecure rambunctiously reactive peanut brain disastrous humanoid creation with yo avocado chin snapping turtle neck OIIIIII DONKEY! Your mom built like Shrek!

Packgod Fanboy?! Guess what? I don’t care about anything you just said you live in your family’s shed you got kicked out of special Ed 97.3% brain cells currently existing within your head are motherfucking dead, get yo ugly ass on boy yo family disowned you bitch, nationwide ain’t even on yo side I don’t wanna hear it infact yo parents kicked out out of the house and you started aggressively tapping the home button on your iPhone with yo boop boop boop boop “help why is it not working?” stop playing with me boy you're like if sully from Monsters Incorporated was a submissive femboy stop playing bruh you broke as hell too bruh you use a big mac wrapper as a blanket and a roll of toilet paper as a pillow with yo nasty ass.

MY CHROMOSOMES?! Bitch yo chromosomes were auto-generated by chatGPT generating noises I don't wanna hear it boy look at you bruh you like a level 14 skuntank with osteoporosis what is you saying bruh you and your father currently have a 1 bar bluetooth connection stop playing, why is you ballin up your fists like you finna fight me boy if we were to fight you'd bring a pair of wii nunchucks and start throwing Skylanders at me, stop playing.

guess what I caught you pole dancing for the three blind mice in the middle of a New York City subway you lookin like this: Oooooouup! uuuuuoooooo! You dumb as hell infact you thought hooters was a sacred clan of high ranking Kahoot players get yo ass on boy stop playing bruh your mom got robbed by a Make-A-Wish kid with a bent plastic spoon your uncle tried making a makeshift fleshlight out of a lubricated onion ring your grandfather got a parking ticket for sitting on a couch and your dad just got arrested by The Lorax for shaving his beard infact you sat on your dad’a wiener last night and started singing 🎵 Life is a highway, I’m gonna ride it all night long 🎵 who you talking to in that fursuit you think you’re iron man talking to Jarvis up in there “Jarvis fluff up my fur by 87% what is you doing- Get a girlfriend? Get yo what’s good sexy girl who told you to pass me looking this fine!!!! Shut up? Man you better get yo “Iraq, Croatia, Switzerland, Israel, let’s play football! Shut uuuuup! No one caaaaaares! No one aaaaaasked! You’re my bitch, bitch! Shut uuuuuuup!

          SSSniperWolf Apology

            Let me start by saying I’m sorry for my recent actions; it is inexcusable. I’m sorry to Jacksfilm, YouTube, the entire creator community, and my incredible fans for not being a better example for appropriate conflict resolution. Jacksfilm, while we certainly don’t see eye to eye and have our differences, I am sorry for reacting the way I did when I should’ve taken the opportunity to show young creators how adults and professionals resolve conflict by communicating directly, respectfully, and privately; not for views or content, but a meaningful example of how conflict should be solved. I will reach out directly and hope we can find some time to connect and communicate, respectfully. I’d also like to thank YouTube for holding me accountable. I deserve it, respect the decision and appreciate the opportunity to learn and grow from a true lapse in judgement.

            Every Influencer apology video copypasta