Copypasta of a person’s past experience or events that is so absurd it became a meme of its own. Usually untrue stories that tries to circle jerk opinions.
A liberal Muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx, known atheist "Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"
At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.
"How old is this rock?"
The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian"
"Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real… then it should be an animal now"
The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.
The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.
The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.
Semper Fi
Hello there, So basically what happened was I was browsing through Reddit but then my parents (I posted them onto r/entitledparents cause that’s what heroes do) wanted me to go to the hospital to see my grandma one last time. I really didn’t want to but I decided to go since it’s basically free r/cringetopia karma (I need enough karma to post on r/dankmemes) so then at my grandma’s bed, she was saying cringe stuff like “I always loved the smile on your face, M13 (me)” or “I really want to see you again, I love you” so then I decided to say “ok boomer” (cause it would be free r/unexpected karma) but then she passed away. My cringe parents were talking about how disrespectful that was while they were crying (LOL CAUGHT IN 4K) so then I, M13 told them that they got busted onto r/entitledparents. I was then taken to the orphanage since my parents didn’t understand any of my memes (cringe parents don’t understand 21st century humor) but at least I got to show the other kids there my funny wholesome memes.
My boyfriend expressed an interest in wanting to be pegged. I was very supportive but also intimidated because I don't have a lot of experience with ass play on men. But I went ahead and bought a 15 inch strap-on. It felt really strange to wear the dildo, like, awkward with this purple appendage protruding from my pelvis, pointed at my boyfriend’s poised ass. Once the dildo was inside, I checked in with him to make sure I wasn't hurting him, and he replied, 'Are you in all the way?' After I began thrusting, he said, 'I don't think this is working, it's not big enough!'”
Guys help something is going on with my son. So I(41M) have been having a lot of trouble with my son recently. It started out 3 months ago he would start randomly and loudly moaning during eating, he also often started rubbing and smearing the food on him. Then he also started randomly crying during eating. He also would masturbate and cum during eating and he also started going through my wife's (5F) and mine (63M) drawer and cumming in our underwear. Now this would all be normal after all he's a teenage boy and I did the same thing when I was his age. However what made me really caucious was when he started shitting in his hand and smearing it against him and when he would add the shit into his potato porridge and he would eat the whole thing. So I (68M) went looking around his room and wanted to look in his laptop to maybe find what was causing his strange behavior. I open a file titled as "Porn" and find numerous "Nikocado Avocado Fart Compilation" videos. Unfortunately I hear him coming back so I didn't want to be caught by him so I hide in the locker. Then I watch as he sits down and starts watching one of the videos and starts loudly moaning and masturbating and cumming while he is smearing against his body a yoghurt he brought for eating. I was extremely disgusted by this so I got out of the locker thinking I have to go to the toilet to vomit, however I didn't make it in time to the toilet and vomited all over his locker and room and ran out of his room. Now I am sitting here wondering how can I help my son, guys if any of you have any idea what to do please send help.
December 31st 2021 - I sat in my chair furiously masturbating my dick desperate to release gallons of sperm but I resisted the urge and I kept edging for 5 minutes carefully watching the clock on my PC. I waited in anticipation until finally it was 2022. I ejaculated releasing loads and loads of gooey white cum everywhere, I moaned with satisfaction, proud of my achievement.
I had just become the first person to cum in 2022. I look over my cum filled desk and chair with pride.
So all of you can go cry, because none of you will be able to claim my title of first person to cum in 2022. Go wallow in sorrow and self-pity at the fact that you missed the opportunity to ejaculate just when it reached the New Year at midnight. While you subhuman mere mortals are setting of fireworks at midnight, I am blasting a massive explosion of cum everywhere. Oh yes, I am now superior to everyone on the planet, bow down to me, the cum lord of 2022.
Happy new year, losers.
Hello everyone, concerned Christian Father here. My son has recently got into the game called Fortnite? I've spent well over $500 on this game and its becoming a problem. Apparently the game is down right now and its causing a lot distress for my child. He keeps taking my newspaper and tries to "full piece" me. I don't know what this means but I'm starting to think its something associated with the devil. He won't come with us anywhere unless we take a "launch pad" to get there. Its starting to get worse by the hour and I don't know how much longer I can take this. His legs, arms, and hands are shaking violently yet he refuses to take any type of medicine unless its a "big pot" or "chuggies." Someone please help me.
