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Jokes

Copypasta related to an internet joke.


How to convince a kid you’re not an Italian mob member.

    My dream is to talk like this
    Ey look buddy, you cant just say am an italian mob member jus coz im italian ait? Das very offensive, ait? Now, lemme give ya som advice kid - in dis typa wold you either a smart fella, or a fart smella. An lemme tell ya, ya seem like a smart fella to me, wich is gud cuz ya dont wanna be a fart smella, cuz fart smellas get thei knee caps broken, ait? fart smellas go sleepin wit de fishes, ait? you dont wanna be a fart smella. Ey look buddy, I like ya, my boss Big Al, he gots a pizza restaurant right around da corna, if ye wants to make som extra cash and can work wit clientz go tell em Giorgi sent ya, ait? Stay otta trouble smart fella.

    Shut yo lean mean string bean

      Now just paste this onto every internet argument.
      Based
      shut yo lean mean string bean charlie sheen limousine canteen trampoline serpentine antihistamine wolverine submarine unclean nectarine broken gene halloween defective spleen smokescreen james green putting green tiny peen anti vaccine aquamarine eugene extra green nicotine vaseline jellybean magazine protien lightning mcqueen vending machine what'chu mean ocean man by ween lookin ass skin tone chicken bone google chrome no home flip phone disowned ice cream cone garden gnome extra chromosome metronome dimmadome genome full blown monochrome student loan indiana jones overgrown flintstone x and y hormone friend zone sylvester stallone sierra leone autozone professionally seen silver patrone tf up

      If you yell Amogus 69 times

        Amogus is a bastardized version of the name of the online 2018 video game Among Us
        If you shit in the sink at exactly 4:20 am and yell “amogus” 69 times,a shadowy figured called mom will come to beat you up and you will wake up in a place called the orphanage

        Masturbation is a sport

          "involves individuals and groups that can compete against each other"
          Masturbation is a sport.

According to Oxford Dictionary, a sport is defined as “an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment."

Masturbation:

   • involves physical exertion

   • involves skill

   • is entertaining

   • involves individuals and groups that can compete against each other

Therefore, using this criteria, beating your meat is objectively a sport.

          Kanye West

            Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest
            After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest. Then to school to take his Kanye Test. He forgot to brush his teeth. Did he run out of Kanye Crest? His neighbor stole it, what a Kanye Pest. He then puts on some axe for some Kanye zest and goes to the bar puffing out his Kanye chest. Gets drunk into a Kanye mess and goes home to the the Kanye West part of town. He realized his life was a wreck, and was feeling a little Kanye depressed. “My life sucks he Kanye digressed. He decided to get some Italian to he flew to Kanye Trieste. He got some pasta and started to Kanye digest. You should get some Kanye rest his wife Kanye pressed. Instead he went to a Kanye fest. He then realized he needed to go to Dallas for his competition, so he went to the airport and hopped on Kanye southwest, got some Kanye rest, and the next morning was feeling ready for his Kanye contest. Or at least he Kanye guessed. On the day of the competition he was feeling a little Kanye stressed. But in the end the judges were Kanye impressed. For his performance he was awarded with the Kanye chest, clearly identified with the Kanye crest. There ends the story of Kanye West.