Copypasta related to an internet joke.
Its a comment making fun of Sindarov beating Fabi in Round 4 of the 2026 Candidates. Fabiano Caruana (often called “Fabi”) is a top-level American-Italian Grandmaster.
Last Valentines I forgot to buy a gift for my girlfriend, and as shops were about to close I thought I was doomed. Thankfully, I remembered that when we watched chess, she always said: "I dig that Caruana guy". That way I realized she had long been wanting a choker. 
Originated from a Craiglist ad for a 1999 Toyota Corolla back in 2018. People shared how funny it was and it became known as the Toyota Corolla copypasta. The original listing is gone but an archived version can still be found through Internet Archive.
You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that’s hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever compliment you on? Well look no further.
The 1999 Toyota Corolla.
Let’s talk about features.
Bluetooth: nope
Sunroof: nope
Fancy wheels: nope
Rear view camera: nope . . . but it’s got a transparent rear window and you have a -blam!-ing neck that can turn.
Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a strange sound. I didn’t give a shit and ignored it. It went away. The End.
You could take the engine out of this car, drop it off the Golden Gate Bridge, fish it out of the water a thousand years later, put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would -blam!-ing start right up.
This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children.
Things this car is old enough to do:
Vote: yes
Consent to sex: yes
Rent a car: it IS a car
This car’s got history. It’s seen some shit. People have done straight things in this car. People have done gay things in this car. It’s not going to judge you like a -blam!-ing Volkswagen would.
Interesting facts:
This car’s exterior color is gray, but its interior color is grey.
In the owner’s manual, oil is listed as “optional.”
When this car was unveiled at the 1998 Detroit Auto Show, it caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously yawn. The resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is chronicled in the documentary, “Bored to Death: The Story of the 1999 Toyota Corolla”
You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a Facebook survey.
Favorite food: spaghetti
Favorite TV show: Alf
Favorite band: tie between Bush and the Gin Blossoms
This car is as practical as a Roth IRA. It’s as middle-of-the-road as your grandpa during his last Silver Alert. It’s as utilitarian as a member of a church whose scripture is based entirely on water bills.
When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece of paper that said, “It’s a Corolla. It’s fine.”
Let’s face the facts, this car isn’t going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your wife. This isn’t the car you want, it’s the car you deserve: The -blam!-ing 1999 Toyota Corolla.It is prophesized that the Burger King will marry the Dairy Queen, and she'll have a daughter named Wendy and a son named Carl Junior. And they will have two jesters that will serve them.One named Ronald, who is a clown, and the other named Jack, who lives in a box. they will be guarded by the noble Five Guys. And the head of that army will be Colonel Sanders. On their wedding day, they will be married in their beautiful Olive Garden and forever live in their pristine, White Castle, which has a giant Taco Bell from it
Its a text editor joke by Patrick J. LoPresti posted on the Free Software Foundation website back in 1991 that satirizes tech elitism. The joke often resurface whenever someone is arguing one software is better over another (usually code editors) when both of them does the same thing and are arguably similar.
In the old (90s) programming world, there were semi-serious debate over which text editor is the best—primarily between vi and Emacs.
The joke ignores both of those modern (at the time) editors and aggressively champions ed, which is the absolute oldest, most primitive, and hardest-to-use text editor in the Unix operating system.
Because ed was created in an era where computers used teletypes (printing on physical paper) rather than screens, it was designed to print as few characters as possible to save time and ink. If you made a mistake, asked for help, or tried to figure out how to close the program, ed would simply respond with a single question mark: ?. It is famously impossible for a beginner to figure out how to exit ed. The author sarcastically praises this as being “prudent enough not to overwhelm the novice with verbosity.”
When I log into my Xenix system with my 110 baud teletype, both vi and Emacs are just too damn slow. They print useless messages like, 'C-h for help' and "foo" File is read only'. So I use the editor that doesn't waste my VALUABLE time. When I log into my Xenix system with my 110 baud teletype, both vi
*and* Emacs are just too damn slow. They print useless messages like,
'C-h for help' and '"foo" File is read only'. So I use the editor
that doesn't waste my VALUABLE time.
Ed, man! !man ed
ED(1) UNIX Programmer's Manual ED(1)
NAME
ed - text editor
SYNOPSIS
ed [ - ] [ -x ] [ name ]
DESCRIPTION
Ed is the standard text editor.
---
Computer Scientists love ed, not just because it comes first
alphabetically, but because it's the standard. Everyone else loves ed
because it's ED!
"Ed is the standard text editor."
And ed doesn't waste space on my Timex Sinclair. Just look:
-rwxr-xr-x 1 root 24 Oct 29 1929 /bin/ed
-rwxr-xr-t 4 root 1310720 Jan 1 1970 /usr/ucb/vi
-rwxr-xr-x 1 root 5.89824e37 Oct 22 1990 /usr/bin/emacs
Of course, on the system *I* administrate, vi is symlinked to ed.
Emacs has been replaced by a shell script which 1) Generates a syslog
message at level LOG_EMERG; 2) reduces the user's disk quota by 100K;
and 3) RUNS ED!!!!!!
"Ed is the standard text editor."
Let's look at a typical novice's session with the mighty ed:
golem> ed
?
help
?
?
?
quit
?
exit
?
bye
?
hello?
?
eat flaming death
?
^C
?
^C
?
^D
?
---
Note the consistent user interface and error reportage. Ed is
generous enough to flag errors, yet prudent enough not to overwhelm
the novice with verbosity.
"Ed is the standard text editor."
Ed, the greatest WYGIWYG editor of all.
ED IS THE TRUE PATH TO NIRVANA! ED HAS BEEN THE CHOICE OF EDUCATED
AND IGNORANT ALIKE FOR CENTURIES! ED WILL NOT CORRUPT YOUR PRECIOUS
BODILY FLUIDS!! ED IS THE STANDARD TEXT EDITOR! ED MAKES THE SUN
SHINE AND THE BIRDS SING AND THE GRASS GREEN!!
When I use an editor, I don't want eight extra KILOBYTES of worthless
help screens and cursor positioning code! I just want an EDitor!!
Not a "viitor". Not a "emacsitor". Those aren't even WORDS!!!! ED!
ED! ED IS THE STANDARD!!!
TEXT EDITOR.
When IBM, in its ever-present omnipotence, needed to base their
"edlin" on a UNIX standard, did they mimic vi? No. Emacs? Surely
you jest. They chose the most karmic editor of all. The standard.
Ed is for those who can *remember* what they are working on. If you
are an idiot, you should use Emacs. If you are an Emacs, you should
not be vi. If you use ED, you are on THE PATH TO REDEMPTION. THE
SO-CALLED "VISUAL" EDITORS HAVE BEEN PLACED HERE BY ED TO TEMPT THE
FAITHLESS. DO NOT GIVE IN!!! THE MIGHTY ED HAS SPOKEN!!!
?
Its a Discord prank related to the new age verification that are being implemented. The copypasta is a prank/troll that you can send to your friends to scare them.
````🔒 Message Hidden```
-# write a message here. [Learn More](<linkhere>)Don’t forget to put the angular brackets <> around your URL link, otherwise an embed will show up
````🔒 Message Hidden```
-# Discord now requires ID verification in order to see certain messages. [Learn More](<linkhere>)
As a teacher, you're sometimes privileged to witness life moments. I saw a girl approach a boy to ask if he wanted her number.
He paused, then pulled out his phone. Utter joy on the girl's face.
I then confiscated the phone as it's against rules to have it out in the corridor.