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Female Flame Atronach from Oblivion

    Flame Atronach in the Oblivion Remastered

    Its an infamous old copypasta about sexing the Flame Atronach from Oblivion. It originally came from an anonymous comment on a NSFW artwork of the Flame Atronach on R34 site back in 2012. The comment got reposted everywhere and eventually became a meme within the Elder Scrolls community.

    The released of Oblivion Remastered has reignited its popularity.

    I am going to have sex with this female Flame Atronach from Oblivion. I find the Flame Atronaches in The Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion sexy. However, their body is made up of 87% fire, and 100% fire surrounds them. That could kill me if I tried to have sex with one. To remedy this, the Flame Atronach casts a spell on me making me resistant to fire. Keep in mind, resistant is not the same as immune. I still take damage. It is either 1 point or 0 points of damage each second I am having sex with her. Just because a particular second caused 0 points of damage, does not mean that I did not feel anything, it just means I took no damage. I am not going to rush through having sex with this Flame Atronach. I make sure I pleasure anything I have sex with-especially non-humans! I'd rather take damage than not pleasure the Flame Atronach. The Flame Atronach and I go to the Planes of Oblivion to have sex. When having sex with non-humans, it is ALWAYS sexier to have sex in their natural habitat rather than a human's natural habitat. The Planes of Oblivion is the Flame Atronach's natural habitat.

    Original full version

    Flame Atronach copypasta
    Old atronach
    I am going to have sex with this female Flame Atronach from Oblivion. I find the female Atronaches in The Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion sexy. However, their body is made up of 87% fire, and 100% fire surrounds them. That could kill me if I tried to have sex with one. To remedy this, the Flame Atronach casts a spell on me making me resistant to fire. Keep in mind, resistant is not the same as immune. I still take damage. It is either 1 point or 0 points of damage each second I am having sex with her. Just because a particular second caused 0 points of damage, does not mean that I did not feel anything, It just means that I took no damage. I am not going to rush through having sex with this Flame Atronach, I make sure I pleasure anything I have sex with, especially non-humans! I'd rather take damage than not pleasure the Flame Atronach.The Flame Atronach and I go to the Planes of Oblivion to have sex. When having sex with non-humans, it is ALWAYS sexier to have sex in their natural habitat rather than a human's natural habitat.Before we went into the Planes of Oblivion, the Flame Atronach let all the Daedra know that we are just here for sex. The Daedra will not attack us because they know I am here at the Planes of Oblivion on sexual business. This includes the Dremora. However, the Dremora Marknyaz thinks that I am going to be an easy recruit for becoming a follower of Mehrunes Dagon considering that I am having sex with a Flame Atronach. However, I have no interest in becoming a Daedra.
    New remastered atronach
    I am going to have sex with this female Flame Atronach from Oblivion. I find the female Atronaches in The Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion sexy. However, their body is made up of 87% fire, and 100% fire surrounds them. That could kill me if I tried to have sex with one. To remedy this, the Flame Atronach casts a spell on me making me resistant to fire. Keep in mind, resistant is not the same as immune. I still take damage. It is either 1 point or 0 points of damage each second I am having sex with her. Just because a particular second caused 0 points of damage, does not mean that I did not feel anything, It just means that I took no damage. I am not going to rush through having sex with this Flame Atronach, I make sure I pleasure anything I have sex with, especially non-humans! I'd rather take damage than not pleasure the Flame Atronach.

The Flame Atronach and I go to the Planes of Oblivion to have sex. When having sex with non-humans, it is ALWAYS sexier to have sex in their natural habitat rather than a human's natural habitat.

Before we went into the Planes of Oblivion, the Flame Atronach let all the Daedra know that we are just here for sex. The Daedra will not attack us because they know I am here at the Planes of Oblivion on sexual business. This includes the Dremora. However, the Dremora Marknyaz thinks that I am going to be an easy recruit for becoming a follower of Mehrunes Dagon considering that I am having sex with a Flame Atronach. However, I have no interest in becoming a Daedra.

    Flame Atronach (Good ending)

    Good ending for the Flame Atronach meme
    Hey guys, did you know that in terms of human companionship, Flame Atronach is objectively the most huggable Daedroth? While their maximum temperature is likely too much for most, they are capable of controlling it, so they can set themselves to the perfect temperature for you. Along with that, they have a lot of cake, making them undeniably incredibly soft to touch. But that's not all, they have a very respectable special defense stat of 110, which means that they are likely very calm and resistant to emotional damage. Because of this, if you have a bad day, you can vent to it while hugging it, and it won't mind. It can make itself even more endearing with moves like Charm Mortal and Flame Cloak, ensuring that you never have a prolonged bout of depression ever again.


    Powerplex speech

      Its from the opening scene of S03E06 of Invincible where Powerplex was introduced with a monologue of him seeking revenge towards [Title card].

      You're not listening! This isn't about me! This is about the thousands of people Invincible murdered, and the countless other lives Invincible destroyed! Why is Invincible above the law?! Why does Invincible never pay for his crimes? Where is Invincible when people are trying to put their world back together?! What do I want? I want the truth! I want justice! I want INVINCIBLE!
      You're not listening! This isn't about me! This is about the thousands of people [Title card] murdered, and the countless other lives [Title card] destroyed! Why is [Title card] above the law?! Why does [Title card] never pay for his crimes? Where is [Title card] when people are trying to put their world back together?! What do I want? I want the truth! I want justice! I want [Title card]!
      You’re not listening! This isn’t about me. This is about the thousands of people [Invincible] murdered and the countless other lives [Invincible] destroyed. Why is [Invincible] above the law? Why does [Invincible] never pay for his crimes? Where is [Invincible] when people are trying to put their world back together?

Okay, buddy, we hear you. So, what do you want?

What do I want? I want- I want the truth! I want justice! I want [Invincible]!

      Eggman announcement

        Eggman announcement copypasta
        Original

        Its the infamous video of Eggman announcing to the whole world that Shadow pissed on his wife and he’s ending the world because of that.

        I've come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch-ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right. He took his hedgehog fuckin' quilly dick out and he pissed on my FUCKING wife, and he said his dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com. Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby. Tall points, no quills, no pillows, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck the earth. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on the MOOOON! How do you like that, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit the fucking earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!

        Water Is NOT Wet

          From a video by Chaz Smith where he argues that water cannot be wet since being that implies it can also be dry.

          This is the copypasta that’s gonna end the water is wet debate, once and for all. My answer? WATER’S NOT WET! And I’ll tell you why. To say that something is wet means that the water on the surface of that something can be removed. You get caught outside in the rain, you say “Aw, my hair got wet, now I gotta get it redid.” “Aw, my shoes got wet, now I gotta let’em sit outside, and dry.” You don’t say, that the ocean gets wet, it’s just water, water is water. Fire, right? We know that it burns things right? But it’s not in and of itself burned, right? Water, it wets things but it’s not in and of itself wet. Okay? The word wet is only supposed to be used when water gets on something. For example if I were to splash water on this mirror right here and say it’s wet, but if it were somehow possible to splash water droplets onto water, well you could see the water droplets sitting on the water, you’d say “Oh that water is wet!” But the term wet is an adjective that is only conditional, that’s used to describe the surface of something that is typically dry. Ladies and gentlemen, here’s the simple proof test: This counter is dry, I pour water on it, it becomes wet. Can it be dried? Absolutely. Therefore was wet it is now dry. The water on the inside of the bottle, however. Can it be dried? Absolutely the frick not! Ending clause: The definition of wet reads “Covered or saturated with water or another liquid”. Water cannot be covered or saturated with itself. Thank you.

          Luna is not just a character to me. She is the center of my world.

            Luna from mo.co
            source
            I don’t play Mo.co for the wepons. I don’t play it for the bosses, the XP or the events. I play for Luna.

Luna is not just a character to me. She is the center of my world. Every time I hear her sweet voice echoing through waves of mosnters, I feel something inside me. I’ve memorized every line, every attack of hers, every pixel of her skin, down to the Hex color of her hair. People say shes just part of the game, but to me? She IS the game.

When I did Boss Beat for 20 hours straight, people thought it did it for the XP. In reality I was there only for HER. I imagined her watching me. Judging me for every death. Rewarding me with a nod, maybe even a smile. Every enemy I slayed, I slayed in her name. Every level I climbed was a step closer to being worthy of Luna.

Whenever someone in a party calls out her name, I freeze. My breathing goes faster. I start sweating. Does she know I’m thinking about her? Does she feel what im feeling? The way she commands the battlefield, effortlessly handling monsters with calm precision... it’s not just strength — it’s divinity. Secretly, I wonder if she could handle me. And then -one day- she stopped giving quests.

The light faded from my world. I logged in, and her voice was gone. The silence was unbearable. created a new account to see her again, but it wasnt the same. Nothing. The world felt dull, lifeless. My motivation to do anything was gone. Assignments, sleep, food irrelevant. Why do anything if Luna isn't guiding me?

Now I grind, to become the strongest Hunter in the server. Because deep down, I believe, that when I’m strong enough, when I’ve proven myself, Luna will return. She’ll look at me with those pixel-perfect eyes and say, “You’ve done well, Hunter.”

Mommy Luna, I await your next quest.

            They aborted my girlfriend

              I can't stop thinking that the woman who would have fallen in love with me was aborted in this timeline, and that's why I'm alone. In another alternate timeline, her mother didn't abort her, and she grew up to fall in love with me. I must be very happy there, but here I'm a failure. Without a doubt, my aborted girlfriend would have loved me, and I wouldn't be sad.

              Gilfoyle answers what do you do in the company?

                Gilfoyle from Silicon Valley

                Its a famous scene from the show Silicon Valley where Gilfoye was asked by Jared on what he does in the company. The copypasta answer then ensues. 

                System architecture. Networking and security. No one in this house can touch me on that.

But does anyone appreciate that? While you were busy minoring in gender studies and singing a capella at Sarah Lawrence, I was gaining root access to NSA servers. I was one click away from starting a second Iranian revolution… I prevent cross-site scripting, I monitor for DDoS attacks, emergency database rollbacks, and faulty transaction handlings. The Internet heard of it? Transfers half a petabyte of data every minute. Do you have any idea how that happens? All those YouPorn ones and zeroes streaming directly to your shitty, little smart phone day after day? Every dipshit who shits his pants if he can't get the new dubstep Skrillex remix in under 12 seconds? It's not magic, it's talent and sweat. People like me, ensuring your packets get delivered, un-sniffed. So what do I do? I make sure that one bad config on one key component doesn't bankrupt the entire fucking company. That's what the fuck I do.
                That's basically what I told him.

                Tumblr user has to unfollow you because the purple creature in your pfp reminds him of his ex gf fursona

                  https://www.tumblr.com/wizard0rb/713191468141035520/hey-im-really-sorry-because-you-were-a-really
                  hey i’m really sorry because you were a really cool mutual but for the record i have to unfollow you because the purple creature in your profile picture (whatever she’s from) (or they sorry i don’t want to assume the beast’s pronouns) (i love all genders) looks almost exactly like my ex girlfriend’s fursona and i tried to ignore that for a while because i’m not the kind of pussy who would unfollow someone because their creature looks like my ex’s fursona but get this: she drew her fursona hitting me (human) (i’m not a furry) (nothing against them) (i love all genders) with a car (honda civic) and sent it to me from a burner account on toyhouse. so needless to say i can’t keep doing this. i’m gonna miss your posts though you were a real one i loved when you would say shit like “it’s (the f slur) wednesday post knuckles”

                  This tells me Soto is an outcast to the main clubhouse.

                    There is a picture of Juan Soto chilling in the bullpen with the bullpen players, and some guy posted the copypasta unironically. It then became a meme AKA the ‘Soto Bullpen’ copypasta. 

                    This tells me Soto is an outcast to the main clubhouse. He’s not vibing with Lindor, Alonso, Nimmo etc. so the bullpen is his safe space and comfort zone. I actually wouldn’t be surprised if he comes out as non binary or has some form of high functioning autism.