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Tragedy of Helldiver Reynold The Bold

    Based on the original ‘Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise‘ which was an iconic scene from Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith.

    Did you ever hear the tragedy of Helldiver Reynold The Bold? I thought not. It’s not a story the Skull Admiral would tell you. It’s a Helldiver legend. Helldiver Reynold was a super citizen turned automaton sympathizer, so powerful and so experienced he could use the 500KG bomb to destroy Fabricators and Bug nest. He had such influence on the citizens of super earth he could recruit so many Helldivers that democracy would always prevail. Communism is a pathway to many anti-democratic thoughts some consider to be unnatural. He became so sympathetic… the only thing he was afraid of was losing an automaton planet, which eventually, of course, the scrap did. Unfortunately, he spread his ideologies to every helldiver he knew, then his robot enemies killed him in battle. Ironic. He could save robots from death but they killed him in the end.

    Happy Easter

      HEY ALL U HOLY WHORES!! 🕳 😇👼!!! This week is 🎉🎉Easter 🥚 🪺 🙏!! You know what that means? 🤔 It’s time to HOP 🐇 over to Daddy Jesus hut 🛖so he can FUCK😫💦 u like a rabbit 🐇  before he feeds you that good dick 🍆 🍆 at the LAST SUPPER! 🍽 🍽 🍽 😙😛“This is my dick,🍆 which will be given up for you.”🔪 🍴 🔪 😮 😲 😋 😋 But Jesus isn’t the only one getting nailed 🔨 cum Friday.😏 😮 😮 😉 😉 On Saturday, Jesus will GET LAID 🛌 ↔️under that ROCK HARD  tomb🪨 🪦 . Cum Easter Sunday, Daddy Jesus going to bust his rocks 🪨 so hard in his grave 🪦 💦 💦 , that he’ll be CUMMING 🥛🍆💦back from the dead💀 so he can fuck you again!! 🤪🤭🙏 After u and daddy FUCK 😫💦 then it’s time for ⛪️church⛪️🙏!!!  💤 😴 Don’t forget to wear your sluttiest outfit 😮 😂 to show off that pair of EASTER EGGS 👚 👗 🥫🥫✊ 🎈. Time for Easter Brunch! 🥘 🍽  But first, Daddy Jesus wants a 3️⃣SUM with you and the EASTER BUNNY!!! 😩🍆🍑💦 🐇😩🍆🍑😍💦😏😉. Then it’s time for the egg hunt 🕵🕵🕵!!! Search in every HOLE,😘😩 CRACK, 😫😍 and CREVICE 🤗😉😏 for the GRAND PRIZE 🤑😇: getting that 🏵🌸🌺PRETTY FLOWER BUD PUSSY 🪷 🍑🍣🌮 RODE BY Jesus on his camel 🐪 🐪 🐪 into the Easter sunset! ☀️ 🌅 🌅 Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY🐰🐰🐰 HOES👄😫🍆💦. If u get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! 🤢If u get 🔟 back ur a LOADED 💋👅🙌🏻😉😏💦💦 EASTER BASKET 🧺. If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED 😱🍆🍑💦💦IN BOTH RABBIT 🐰🐇🐰HOLES🕳 🕳 TONIGHT!!!!
      🐰 HOP HOP HOP 🐰 onto that ⤴️ RISEN ✝ JESUS ✝ COCK! 🍆💦 On this day, our lord 🙏 & savior 🙏 ROSE 👆👆 THAT DICK 🍆 up ⬆️ to save 🙌 us all & open the LEGS of 🙏⛅️ HEAVEN’S PUSSY 💦🐱💦 Jesus has CUM 😩💦 again & now the 🐇🐰 EASTER BUNNY 🐰🐇is 💦 CUMMIN😩 💦 to nibble 👅 on that 🍆 CARROT COCK 🍆 Send ➡️ this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of your HORNIEST 💦🔥 HOLY HOES 🙏✝ this resERECTION day 🍆💦 or you wont get that EASTER 🍬 CANDY 🍬 COCK in your basket 😭🍆 Get 3️⃣ back & you’ll be BLESSED 🙏 with the HOLY 💦CUM💦 OF CHRIST✝️ Get 5️⃣ back & you'll get nailed 🔨😘 on a CROSS tonight✝️💦 Get 🔟 back & you'll get CARROTS 🐰 up your ASS🍑🍑 for the next 4️⃣0️⃣ DAYS😩🙏🏽💦
      Happy EASTER you 🏻🍆 HOLY 👕👕 FUCKING 👌 WHORE! At long 🕗 last ♿ the 🔍😎 day 🕐 has 👏 FINALLY come 💦 when 🍑⏱ our LORD AND 👀💯 SAVIOR JESUS 🙏🙏 THE SLUTTIEST CHRIST is 💦 resurrected ✌✌ from 👉😂 his dead, 💀 DIRTY 👺🛁 ASS 💦 CROSS so 👀✌ he can 😡 69 💯 with 👏 GODDESS 🖼🌟 MOTHER MUFF CUMSUCKER in 👌👌 the 👏 SKY! That’s 👤🗳 right, it’s 🏿 time for 💘 an 😍 ORAL 👄👄 OLYMPICS up in ♂ heaven ✔✔ to 👏💦 CELEBRATE the most SPANKABLE HOLIDAY in ⤵💦 all 😎🤞 of JESUSLAND So 🏻🥛 put 👏 on 🔛🔛 your thongs and your 📥😍 BEGGAR’S SKIRT 💃💃 and 👏 go find 🔍 a 👌👌 ROTTEN WHEAT BUN to EAT 👅😏 because only 💯🔥 SLUTS 👠 get RAISED FROM 👉💰 THE 👉 DEAD ☠☠ like 👏🍑 THAT. 😐 If 💵✈ you 💨☝ don’t, JESUS 🙀🙏 IN 👏🔽 HIS TRUSS will 😘 be 🐝😠 left 🍒 HIGH 👑 AND 🌬👏 DRY 💦🏜 without 🚫 any 👏 HOT 🔥🔥 LOINS to 💯💦 LICK!! 👅 So 💯👏 send 📬 this 👈⬇ to 👏 ALL 🅱🅱 of 🔴 your favorite 📺 HOLY DINGLEBERRIES 
      Goooooooood morning ☀️🏞😄 Playboy Bunnys 😜😜🐰🎉🐇👯‍♀️👅 Today 🗓 is EASTER 🐰🥚 and its time 🕕🕘 to HOP🏃‍♂️over to DADDY’s 😍⛪️CHURCH😛✝️😌🙏 get on ur KNEES🧎🏼🦵 and BEG 🙏😫 for MERCY 😨🥵😫📿😰😩✝️ Did u kno 🧠🧐🤔😉😼 2023 Yrs ago 🗓🔙 Jesus ✝️👩🏻 DIED💀😵😭 and it took him 2️⃣ Hole 🕳 DAYS 📆📆 to respawn… ⏱ (Stupid lag) 🙄😒 BUT then we 👯‍♀️🌏👯‍♀️ were all SAVED 🦸🏻‍♂️😌🙏🎉🤠 by his big RES-ERECTION 😳⬆️☁️👀👅🍆😏 Now his 💒 Church Sanctioned Fursona™ 👀🙏🛐🙊 aka the Easter Bunny 🐰🐇😉 cums ➡️🌏💦 every 🗓 year and U know what bunnys do best… 😏🥚🍑👶👶👶👶 He gonna DROP ⬇️ his 🐤 BABY C🅾️CK🥚🐣 in ur lil pink basket👜😩 til its OVERFLOWING 🤤😫🥚 with his Rainbow Eggs 🏳️‍🌈🤤🥚🍳😫 

Send this 💌 this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of ur 🔥👯‍♀️ Baddest Bunnies🐰😈 If u get 🔟 back ur gettin ur 🍬 candy 🍭licked 👅😉🤤💦 Get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN EGG 🥚👃🤢😰 get 0️⃣ back and u wont get a single Peep🐣👁🚫🙅‍♀️ at that BUNNY D 🐇🍆❌😭😫😓😪😣😰😥😔
      Today 🗓 is EASTER!! 🐰🗓🔙 Jesus's 💒 Church Sanctioned Fursona™ 👀🙏🙊(aka the Easter Bussy) 🐰🐇😉 is ➡️CUMMING 😫💦 2 DROP ⬇️ his 👶🐤 BABY C🅾️CK🥚🐣 in ur lil pink basket👜😩 til its OVERFLOWING 🤤😫🥚 with his Rainbow Eggs 🥚🏳️‍🌈🤤👁️🍳😫

      Don’t forget to send this weird fact about the Easter Bunny too!

      Today 🗓 is EASTER!! 🐰🗓🔙 Jesus's 💒 Church Sanctioned Fursona™ 👀🙏🙊(aka the Easter Bussy) 🐰🐇😉 is ➡️CUMMING 😫💦 2 DROP ⬇️ his 👶🐤 BABY C🅾️CK🥚🐣 in ur lil pink basket👜😩 til its OVERFLOWING 🤤😫🥚 with his Rainbow Eggs 🥚🏳️‍🌈🤤👁️🍳😫
      🐰🍬🍭HOP HOP 🐰🍬🍭It’s EASTER ❕❕💐🐣🌷🐥🌻🌼☀️🐤 and YOU have been 👉👉poked👈👈 by the 💕🆒🐰EASTER BUNNY 🐰🆒💕 send 📱📬📩 this message to 🔟 people YOU love💗💛❤️💙💚💜 or get 🔟 carrots stuck up YOUR ass 🙈🚫🔪💣🔫 at MIDNIGHT ‼️‼️🙇🕛💯👌
      Hippity 🐰hoppity 🐰HOES 👯its Easter 📅🍭🍫and you 👉🏻know what that means. 👅👄💦💦💦Big 🐇bunny 🐰daddy 😫😫😫is going to bring all his sluttiest 😏😳chicks 🐥🐥some of his sweet 🍫candy🍬 DICK 🍆💦👅Jesus 👳🏾died 🙅🏻❌for a whole 💝life of sin😏😏😏, but the Easter 🥚🥚🥚Daddy👱🏻 only CUMS 😫🍆once 1️⃣a year😳. Send➡️ this to 1️⃣5️⃣of your SLUTTIEST 🚺🚺🚺disciples 💒to get bunny 🐇CUMMIES 💦💦💦for your Easter 🍫🐥🐰and have daddy 👱🏻🐇put his white😏❕ chocolate 😩🍫CUM 🍦into one1️⃣ of your👉🏻 eggs. If you get ❌🚫none❌🙅🏻🤦🏻‍♀️ back you’re 👉🏻a stillborn🚼❎ egg 🥚🍳(prude) 👼🏻😒😒if you get five 5️⃣back you’re 👉🏻daddies 🐇peep🐣🐣🐣 show if you get 1️⃣0️⃣ back 😩you’re a chocolate🍫🍫 WHORE 😏👯if you get all 1️⃣5️⃣ you’re daddies🕺🏼 CARROT 🥕🥕💦💦CUMPIE 🍰🍰🍰
      HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY🐰🐰🐰 HOES!!! Today is 🎉🎉Easter!! You know what that means🤔🤔🤔??? It’s time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK😫😫💦💦💦 u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK 😫💦 then it’s time for ⛪️church⛪️!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK🍆🍆😍😍 because jesus is CUMMING😩🍆🍑💦 back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY🐇😩🍆🍑😍💦😏😉. Then it’s time for the egg hunt 🕵🕵🕵!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE😘😩 CRACK 😫😍 and CREVICE 🤗😉😏 for the GRAND PRIZE 🤑😇 getting that 🏵🌸🌺PASTEL PUSSY🍑🍣🌮 RODE 🏇🏇🏇 into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY🐰🐰🐰 HOES👄😫🍆💦. If u get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get 🔟 back ur a LOADED 💋👅🙌🏻😉😏💦💦 EASTER BASKET. If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED 😱🍆🍑💦💦IN UR RABBIT 🐰🐇🐰HOLE TONIGHT!!!!
      👂🏽LISTEN UP👂🏽 BITCHES❕❗️❕Today is EASTER 🐇🐇 and 👉you👈 know 🤓 what that means 😩😩😩 The 🐰Easter Bunny🐰 is CUMMIN💦💦💦 and he's gonna put his 🐣🐤cock🐤🐣 in your 👅🎀pink basket👜😫 get ready for your 🍭jelly bean🍭 to be licked👅👅👅 and your 🍳easter eggs🍳 fertilized🌱 april showers🍆💦💦💦 brings horny✨ may 🌷flowers🌷 Jesus✝ ain't the only thing ⤴️rising⤴️ this Sunday🙏🏽⚡️😉 it's time to let that 👶🏽baby making👶🏽 spring 🌧 rain drizzle 💦💦😳😜 send this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of your sluttiest💋 spring hoes👠💄 to get something 💥special💥 in your 🍑buttercup🌼🌼 if you get 5️⃣ or less back 😅 the Easter bunny is skipping your egg 😭😖 if you get 1️⃣0️⃣ back you're a rascally rabbit 😈😳😈 and if you get 2️⃣0️⃣ you're a BAD 😏😜 BUNNY 🐰💦🍆😩 
      Happy EASTER🎉🎉 you snow 🐰🐰🐰BUNNY hoes! It’s time to HOP🏃‍♂️ over to DADDY’s ⛪️CHURCH so he can fuck😩😩 u like a RABBIT. Be sure to ride that COCK🍆🍆 until your EASTER BASKET is full of EGGS🥚🥚🥚 and DADDIES CUMMIES💦💦❤️. After that u better BUNNY hop your way to GOD’s🙌 house so the PASTOR😁🤵 can tell u to get on your KNEES until you’re FORGIVEN in the EYES👀👀 of the LORD✝️✝️✝️✝️. JESUS👼 is CUMMING🍆🍑🍆🍍🍑 back today so you best be sure to send this to 5️⃣ of your best EASTER BUNNY HOES🐰🐰🐰. If u get 5️⃣ back the LORD isn’t the only thing that’s RISEN🍆🍆🍆 today. If you get 🔟 back you’re a LOADED💦💦 EASTER BASKET🛍🛍. If you get 0️⃣ back you’re a ROTTEN EGG🥚 who’s getting NO CUMMIES🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️ this EASTER😭😭 
      it's 😛 EASTER BITCH🐰🐰 when our homie 👬JESUS 🙏🏼 got turnt up 🍷🍷 from the 😜😜motherFUCKING GRAVE☠⚰ and the EASTER BUNNY😮🐰 gives US 💯‼️ his GOLDEN💰💰 EGG 🍳 right in ⤴️ OUR LITTLE BASKETS 🍆💦 SEND TO 1️⃣5️⃣ to get YOUR EGGS🍳🍳 EATEN😆😛 GET 5️⃣ BACK AND YOU 💯 are PETER RABBITS🐇🙌🏼 SLUT! 😜 GET 🔟 BACK AND JESUS 😇 WILL hunt for🔎 YOUR TASTY😛 TREAT💦😩 
      Hoppy Easter 🌸🎉🌷all you sexy bunnies 🐰🥕! Today the sun ☀️ is shining so pull those buns 🍑 out 👀 and let's give Jesus 👼⛪️ a reason to RISE ⬆️ again 🧟‍♂️. If we are good bunnies 🐇🙆‍♀️ then Jesus 🕴won't be the only thing getting NAILED 🔨🙌🙏 tonight. If we are REALLY good 🤤 then there will be a second ✌️ CUMMING 🌬💦. So let's break this bread 🍞🥖 and just remember to not put all our eggs 🥚🐣 in one basket 🧺. Send this to 10 other horny 🦄 Easter bunnies 🐰😩 for an eggcelent night 🌚🤞 
      It's that time again⏱Daddy Claus has been and gone🎅so all you cummy bunnies🐰👀and sexy chicks 🐥 better get egg-cited🥚for Easter to cum😩💦send this to 🔟other chocolate hunnies🍫👅or else you won't❌🚫be hop hop hopping🐇🐇on some Easter Dick😏🍆 
      Hey you 👅slutty ⛓rope bunnies 🐇🐇🐇. the 🌾Easter bunny🐇 is here and he only leaves 👌👌eggs for the sluttiest 👅👄👄 bunnies🐇 on the block💃🏼💃🏼. so it's time to hop 👆🏾👇🏾hop 👆🏾👇🏾hop👆🏾👇🏾 🍑🍑 
on that big bunny dick👉👌. but Easter ain't just about sexy rabbits👄👅🐇. it's about the 🙌🏽good lord🙌🏽 2️⃣. Easter is the day of the 🌄resERECTION🏕🏕🏕 of the original 😩ZADDY😩 Jesus Damn Christ🔥🔥🔥😎. Homie JC was 😮😦trapped❌🚫 in a tomb with his big zaddy ERECTION🍆🍆🍆 for 3️⃣ whole days🆘🆘 without any bitches to fuck😞😞😞 and he still made it through😎😎. send this to 1️⃣2️⃣ 
APOSTLES👬👬👬👬👬👬 who believe in the 💥💥power of zaddy Christ👼👼!!! get 1️⃣1️⃣ back and you can be the 🐇🐇🐇Easter bunny's sexy rope bitch😍😍😍. get 3️⃣ back and you'll get hot🔥 CUM💦💦 in your Easter eggs this year😏😏😏. get 0️⃣ back and you'll be trapped in a cave🆘 like Jesus without any bitches to fuck😞.
      watch out you dirty 💦 playboy 💦 bunnies 🐰🐰🐰 Just 1️⃣ week until EASTER 🐣🎀🎉 can't wait for that 👀 egg hunt👀??? Try 🗺searching 🗺 for THAT D 🍆🍆🍆 instead 💦😍😩 catch me 🐰HOPPIN🐰 on 🤵🏾daddy's 🤵🏾thick Easter COCK 🐰🍆💦 cus 👏🏾 I'm 👏🏾tired👏🏾 of 👏🏾flickin 👏🏾my 👏🏾own 👏🏾 jelly bean 🍭 🙈🙈💦😩I need daddy to put his Cadbury 🍼CREAM 🍼 all over my 🍳eggs 🍳 😉😏🎉🙈hope all my little 🐰playboy bunny 🐰sluts are ready for the 💦💦CUMMIEST💦💦 Easter ever‼️‼️💞💞 
      It is 🐣 Easter 😍 enjoy eating 👅 your 💯chocolates💯 but don't 🙅🏻‍♂️ forget to 🙏🏼 pray 🗣 to your lord 👑 and saviour ✝️jesus✝️ 
      🥚 Happy 🤪 Easter ✝️ chicks 🐣 and dicks 🍆💦 the hole-y day 🍳 has finally CUM 💦😩 the huge 🌚 hard rock 🌝 was thrust away ❤️‍🔥 the big furry fella 😳 snuck in the back door 🫣🤭 and hid his festive LOAD all over!! 🗿🪺⏲️ Today is all about RISING ⏏️🆙 getting on your knees 🛐😘 and putting your 💦 ewy gooey 🤩 all over some eggs 🥺😱😜 send this ✉️ to your favorite 😍 lil bunnies 🐰 to celebrate ASSTER 💩💨 if you get less than 5 🙁 back then Jesus died ☠️☦️ for your sins, 🌤️ but you’ll never CUM AGAIN 😲🥶 if you get less than 10 👎🏻🙊 back your sins are forgiven 👼😇 but you’ll never be ridden 🥴🐎 if you get 15 or more back 🥳🎉 you’ll get your Heavenly 🌄🌅 reward 💕👨‍👩‍👦‍👦 and everyBUNNY 🐇👯‍♀️ will want a piece 🤏 of your Easter bASSket 🧺👄 until God tells you 👴🏻 to CUM home 🏡🔙 
      And on the third 3️⃣day, Christ’s DICK 🍆had RISEN ⬆️. You might think🧠 it’s all over for a guy who got LAID to rest 💤 after he was WELL HUNG on a cross ✝️and then PENETRATED by a Roman 🏛️ soldier’s spear (letting everyone watch 👀 too, like an OG OnlyFans), but only his bud 🌹 PETER is denying 🚫 this guy: your Lord 👑 and Savior Jesus H. (the H stands for HUGE DICK 🍆🍆🍆) Christ! So happy Easter, you GROUPIES for His HOLEy 🕳️ Son! While heathens are 👉👌 FUCKING like rabbits 🐇with that Slutty Easter Bunny 🐰, you are GETTING ON YOUR KNEES 🧎‍♀️ready to RECEIVE the BODY of your King 🤴 of Kings (and the blood 🩸 too—must be code for CUM 💦). This ancient white ⚪️guy died so you could SIN: he wants you to put on your Sunday best BIRTHDAY SUIT 🕴️and visit him at his BIG, THICK, THROBBING house 🏠 (you can tell it’s his because there’s a big t ✝️ on it). He’ll have you SCREAMING 😱his NAME, SHOUTING PRAISE 😫, and he might even take you ROLLING🧻 IN THE AISLES. Don’t bring your spouse 💍: if he’s with you in the pew, you’ll realize how PUNY ⚛️ his peepee 🍆 is compared to the LONG SCHLONG 💦 of JESUS KONG 🦍. Unless that’s what y’all are into: then bring your partner so they can be CUCKED while you get SUCKED AND FUCKED by He who gets JERKED by the RIGHT HAND OF THE FATH…no, no incest in this emojipasta, that would be too much…ANYWAY, if you have been a bad he/she/they this Easter 🐰, you need to PROSTrATE 👨‍⚕️yourself on the altar, legs🦵 in the air, and let Jesus DEEP into YOUR SOUL. Remember, holy water 💦makes for GREAT LUBE🌊. If you’re shy, don’t worry, Jesus cums 💦 in EVERYONE. All the New Testament stuff after the GASPels 🫨 is him talking about LOVEMAKING ❤️❤️❤️, right? He’ll teach you how to SUBMIT YOURSELF to your LORD👑. If you’re a VIRGIN, you still will be after, even if you get pregnant 🤰—he literally wrote 📝 the book 📖 on that. And if you think that he won’t WANT YOU because he’s GAY 🏳️‍🌈, he’s actually PAN 🍳! And he’s 🌲 PINING to PORK 🐷🐖🥓 your brains out: fill ‘em with goo 💦, no matter who! After all, it’s Adam and Eve 👫 AND Adam and Steve👬. I saw that on an ad while I was trying to FLICK MY BEAN 🫘to a video 📼 of Jesus saying “HAVE YOU BEEN A BAD GIRL? YOU KNOW, I WASH WHORES’ FEET 👣.” Bet you didn’t know that your Holy Daddy had a foot 🦶fetish, huh? Even Jesus needs someone to delete his browser history so that the atheists don’t find out that he was ALWAYS on WIKIFEET 👠! So send this prayer to 5️⃣ friends and Christ will throw you across a table and have his way with you, like he did the moneylenders 💰💰💰in the Temple 🏛️. Send a missive ✉️ to the BIG MAN upstairs and prepare to get DOWN with the 😇 HOLY TRINITY🥉 : never too old to try a FOURWAY 4️⃣4️⃣4️⃣4️⃣. Whisper your confession to 6️⃣9️⃣ friends, and Jesus will bring you to a sex party 🎉🥳🎈🎁 of biblically accurate angels 👼🏻 who all have like 6️⃣ of everything, INCLUDING SIX 6️⃣ DICKS TO POUND ALL THE EVIL OUT OF YOUR HEART🫀. And after they’ve all CUM 💦 all over you, you can feel set free by the BABY 👶 BATTER BAPTISM 🌊 arranged by your SPIRITUAL PIMP, JESUS CHRIST. Have fun in heaven ☁️☀️☁️, Jeezy! Happy Easter! 
      HE😇 has🍆RISEN ⬆️‼️ Hoppy Easter 🐣 you 😩SEXY😩 bunnies 🐰 & 🐥chicks! It’s time to HOP🐇HOP🐇HOP🐇 and BOUNCE 🍑 your buns 🌭onto that ⤴️ RISING ✝️ JESUS🥖COCK💦 On this day, our lord 🙏🏻 & savior 🙌🏻🙌🏻 RAISED 👆🏻👆🏻THAT DICK 🍆🍆 so 👷🏻‍♀️HARD🫨 he MOVED 🪨 BOULDERS 🪨 just to CUM💦☔️ and save 🙏🏻 us all & open🤲🏻 the LEGS🦵🏼of 👼🏽☁️HEAVEN’s PUSSY!💦🐱💦 Jesus has 💦💦CUM💦 again & now that 😏SLUTTY🗿EASTER🐰🐇BUNNY🐇🐰 is 💦CUMMIN🤤 to 🫦nibble👅 on that 🍆🥕CARROT COCK🥕🍆 If you’re a 😏NAUGHTY😉 egg then ✝️JESUS😇 won’t be the only thing getting 🔨NAILED🔩 tonight. If you are 🫵🏼REALLY🤤🤤 good then there just might be a✌🏻SECOND✌🏻💦CUMMING💨💦!
 Send ➡️➡️this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of your 💦HORNIEST🔥 🙏🏻HOLY🙏🏻 HOES✝️ this resERECTION 🍆 day or you won’t 🙅🏽 get that 🤤SWEET😋SWEET🍬CANDY🍭COCK🍬 in your 🧺basket. Get 3️⃣ back & you’ll be bLESSED 🙏🏻 with the 🙏🏻HOLY 💦 CUM 💦 of CHRIST✝️. Get 5️⃣ back & you’ll see some 🥚BIG EGGS🪺 in your rabbit 🕳️HOLE🍑 tonight 🕰️ Get 1️⃣0️⃣ back & you’ll get 🥕CARROTS🥕 and 🍆COCK🍆 up your 🥵holey🙏🏻ASS🍑🍑 for the next 6️⃣9️⃣days‼️⚠️
      Goooooooood morning ☀️🏞😄 Playboy Bunnys 😜😜🐰🎉🐇👯‍♀️👅 Today 🗓 is EASTER 🐰🥚 and its time 🕕🕘 to HOP🏃‍♂️over to DADDY’s 😍⛪️CHURCH😛✝️😌🙏 get on ur KNEES🧎🏼🦵 and BEG 🙏😫 for MERCY 😨🥵😫📿😰😩✝️ Did u kno 🧠🧐🤔😉😼 2024 Yrs ago 🗓🔙 Jesus ✝️👩🏻 DIED💀😵😭 and it took him 2️⃣ Hole 🕳 DAYS 📆📆 to respawn… ⏱ Stupid lag 🙄😒 BUT then we 👯‍♀️🌏👯‍♀️ were all SAVED 🦸🏻‍♂️😌🙏🎉🤠 by his big RES-ERECTION 😳⬆️☁️👀👅🍆😏 Since then jesus’s 💒 Church Sanctioned Fursona™ 👀🙏🛐🙊 aka the Easter Bunny 🐰🐇😉 cums ➡️🌏💦 every 🗓 year and U know what bunnys do best… 😏🥚🍑👶👶👶👶 He gonna DROP ⬇️ his 🐤 BABY C🅾️CK🥚🐣 in ur lil pink basket👜😩 til its OVERFLOWING 🤤😫🥚 with his Rainbow Eggs 🏳️‍🌈🤤🥚🍳😫 Send this 💌 this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of ur 🔥👯‍♀️ Baddest Bunnies🐰😈 If u get 🔟 back ur gettin ur 🍬 candy 🍭licked 👅😉🤤💦 Get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN EGG 🥚👃🤢😰 get 0️⃣ back and u wont get a single Peep🐣👁🚫🙅‍♀️ at that BUNNY D 🐇🍆❌😭😫😓😪😣😰😥😔

      Trans Day of Visibility and Easter

      🐰 HOPPY 🏳️‍⚧️TRANSGENDER 🗓DAY OF VISIBILITY 🔍👀 AND 🐣EASTER ✝️!! Today we celebrate 🥳 TWO 👯‍♂️ kinds of REBIRTH 🔃 and hunt 🔎👁for TWO 👯‍♂️ kinds of EGGS 🐣🥚🍳. Millennia ago, after being NAILED 🔨🍆 to a cross, ✝️Jesus🤴 WOKE 👀 and LEFT ⬅️ the tomb 🪨🪦 empty and gaping 🕳 . Kings 🤴, queens 👸, AND in-betweens 🫅, 🙏HE🤴✝️ IS RISEN 🍆💦 so put on some pastels 🏳️‍⚧️ and ➡️go💦🍆 fuck 👉👌like 🐰rabbits🐇🐇 Daddy Joe 🇺🇲👴is recognizing both👯‍♂️ of these beautiful✨️🌱 events 🗓today!! God 🌈loves💕 and protects all 🌈 in his flock 🐑 so go pound 🤛🍆 some 👦boy♂️ pussy 🐈😼 or suck 💦 some ♀️gock 👧🐓 in honor of ✝️Christ💒 Send this to 1️⃣0️⃣ Trans 🏳️‍⚧️ Thots 👯‍♂️ if you get 1️⃣0️⃣ back the Easter Bunny 🐰 will fill 🥧your hole 🕳 with fertile 💕🌱eggs 🥚 if you get 5️⃣ back you're getting 💦nailed 🔨 if you get 2️⃣ back your egg 🥚💕 still hasn't cracked 🐣🏳️‍⚧️ and if you don't️🚫 get any 0️⃣👎you're still CHASING 🏃‍♂️💨 rabbits 🐇

      Hey girl, are you the skibidi toilet?

        Hey girl, are you the skibidi toilet? Because I definitely ohio rizz see the two of us skibbing out our gyats under the bussin moon. We could both clout chase together, kai cenat style. I'll rizz you up and compliment your drip any time of the lit af day. I'll interrupt my mewing streak for you bbg. I'll be your simp or your sigma, I'll always pass the vibe check when it comes to getting you on fleek. I'll make our lore so expansive that you'll need matpat to make a game theory on it, And let me be clear, my love is no meme fr fr, It won't take an L after 3 days. So please girlboss, Let's slay together, Will you go out with me?

        Wasteland just saved my life.

          A robber broke into my house with a loaded gun and aimed it at me.

Luckily I just started a game of MW3, it was dom on Wasteland.

He suddenly started watching me play ended up falling asleep.Thank god and thank you SHG for bringing back this certified banger

          I am Talenel’Elin, Herald of War.

            I am Talenel'Elin, Herald of War. The time of the Return, the Desolation, is near at hand. We must prepare. You will have forgotten much, following the destruction of the times past. Kalak will teach you to cast bronze, if you have forgotten this. We will Soulcast blocks of metal directly for you. I wish we could teach you steel, but casting is so much easier than forging, and you must have something we can produce quickly. Your stone tools will not serve against what is to come. Vedel can train your surgeons, and Jezrien . . . he will teach you leadership. So much is lost between Returns . . . I will train your soldiers. We should have time. Ishar keeps talking about a way to keep information from being lost following Desolations. And you have discovered something unexpected. We will use that. Surgebinders to act as guardians . . . Knights . . . The coming days will be difficult, but with training, humanity will survive. You must bring me to your leaders. The other Heralds should join us soon. 
            What the storm did you just storming say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I am Talenel'Elin, Herald of War, and I’ve been involved in numerous Desolations on Roshar, and I have over 300 confirmed deaths.
I am trained in gorilla warfare and I am the top fighter in the entire cosmere armed forces. Kalak can teach you to cast bronze, Vedel can train your surgeons, but you are nothing to me but another storming target. I will wipe you the storm out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before between Returns, mark my storming words.
You think you can get away with saying that crem to me over a Spanreed? Think again, cremling. Your stone tools will not serve against what is to come and your cognitive location is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re storming dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands.
Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but Ishar keeps talking about a way to keep information from being lost following Desolations, and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. You have discovered something unexpected. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your storming tongue.
But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. The coming days will be difficult, but with training, humanity will survive. But you?
You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

            Good Friday

              Jesus🚶‍♂️🤩 is about to DIE😵☠️ for your sins😩😏 so get it out now, sweaty💦😇 It’s GOOD Friday📆✝️ bitches but you better be real👅 fuckin’😳 BAD😈 So get your hands wet💦🙏💦 with some🌊holy water🌊 grab on to His big👁 WOODen🌴✊ cross✝️ and suck 😛😫on some ❤️c🧡o💛l💚o💙r💜f❤️u🧡l💛 hard😟 Easter eggs🥚ω🥚 STRAP👡💆‍♂️ on your crown🤴👑 of hornys🐏😈 and give Peter🐰🌷 some good 🐇cottonTAIL🐇 Pontius Pilate🧝‍♂ is about 2️⃣ sentence YOU to 6 🕕 hours of NAILING🔨🔩 Judas🤫 will be Roman around your bedroom waiting👤 to STAB🔪you in the back with his big🐘 THROBBING🌚 peep🐣🍆 Put 🕳holes🕳 in MY hands🤲 and i'll put my hands🙌 in YOUR 👉🍩holes🍩 You better be FUCKIN’ ✝️ hung🍆👀 cuz it’s gonna take😯 you to your last breath😵💨 Send this💌 to your top 1️⃣0️⃣holiest HOES😇 or Jesus🏃‍♂️🧟‍♂️ won’t take you to his ⚰️tomb😉😜 this Easter🐰😲 
              ⬇️this good 📆friday😇😜 im going to be extra BAD 😎 jesus ⛪️✝️aint the only one☝️getting nailed tonight😩🔨😍 send ➡️this to 🔟 of ur baddest 😎😏jesus 👼🏽hoes if you get 3️⃣back youre getting crucified tonight✝😘, if you get 5️⃣ back ur getting whipped today😩😝, if you get 🔟 back ur ass 🍑is CUMMIN BACK💦🍆😜on Easter Sunday 🐣💐🍭✝🍬