Folks, the bourgeois, they're no good, more and more people are saying it. All these workers— the biggest, we have the biggest workers— very handsome workers come up to me and say, Comrade Trump there is a specter haunting Europe, and you know what, they're right. These bourgeois are very nasty people, very very rude, and very unfair to the workers. They are stealing our surplus value and no one is doing anything about it. The proletariat comes up to me every day and says, Comrade Trump will you lead the revolution? And I gotta turn to them and say look,the instruments of capitalism will be used to bring about its destruction, believe me. The means of production, Obama never wanted to seize them. Well guess what? I'm seizing them. Landlords? They're done for folks. Everyone told me— they said, Comrade Trump you won't be the vanguard of the revolution and they would laugh, the media laughed the democrats laughed, guess who's laughing now?
And then you have these capitalists, those are real beauties! This is their new hoax- they take a piece of machine, a big beautiful shiny new means of production, and they buy it and y'know, they own it, it's a big beautiful shiny new machine, all the bells and whistles, bing bing bing, and then they have the workers- who are totally not being treated fairly in this country, folks, BELIEVE ME, totally exploited, and they have these workers -and they pay them a certain amount, could beee... $20 per hour, could be TEN, could be FIVE, could be TWELVE, they pay them a certain amount, okay, and with their labor they build the product.
And the owner of the machine, of the capital, "Capitalist" they turn around and sell the product at a yuge markup, they call it "profit." ok, so they call it profit! They don't sell it at the cost it took to make it, okay, so what do they do with this extra, you know what I call it? I call it surplus value. I call it surplus value, and do they share the surplus value with the people whose labor PROVIDED the value it took to make that product? I don't think so, folks.
They stick in a bank and then they say "ohhhh I can't afford to pay you more!" Bad- BAD people. It's totally phony, folks. Raw deal, our proletariat are getting a raw deal.
But not for long! We're gonna- and by the way it never occurs the workers to pool their resources and buy the big beautiful machine in order to share the profit that they created in the first place with their labour! And you know why? Because the capitalists pay the workers such a low wage they can't afford to then invest and pool their money and share in ownership... of the means of production! Can't do it! This is the biggest scam on the planet, folks! Boy, I've heard some real beauties but that one, WOW, that's a doozy. That's a real beauty. But we're gonna fix it, folks, we're gonna fix it, okay? and you know what the laborers are going to do? They're gonna WIN.
Folks, what we did in 1917–the Revolution I call it, with a capital R–it's never been done before. So many big beautiful red flags, you couldn't even–now that, folks, that's a flag we stand up for, we don't kneel for our terrific red flag–and you couldn't even see the Winter Palace, you know. You know the Mensheviks, you take a look at what they said, and they were a, uh, a failed party, and Renegade Kautsky, very nasty to me but that's okay, they said we couldn't do it! They said, "Oh, Donald, the material conditions are bad, we have to have a bourgeois republic to develop the forces of production." You know what that means, right? Semi-feudal economy! Okay, you get Semi-Feudal, and I said, I told them we can't have Semi-Feudal. Well, look at where we are now. We are going to develop the forces of production so fast it'll make your head spin. We are going to do in a generation what it took them many, many years to do. BELIEVE ME.
Shorter version
Folks, the bourgeois, they're no good, more and more people are saying it. All these workers— the biggest, we have the biggest workers— very handsome workers come up to me and say, Comrade Trump there is a specter haunting Europe, and you know what, they're right. These bourgeois are very nasty people, very very rude, and very unfair to the workers. They are stealing our surplus value and no one is doing anything about it. The proletariat comes up to me every day and says, Comrade Trump will you lead the revolution? And I gotta turn to them and say look,the instruments of capitalism will be used to bring about its destruction, believe me. The means of production, Obama never wanted to seize them. Well guess what? I'm seizing them. Landlords? They're done for folks. Everyone told me— they said, Comrade Trump you won't be the vanguard of the revolution and they would laugh, the media laughed the democrats laughed, guess who's laughing now?
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⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⣾⣿⣿⣴⣷⣧⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼
⣻⠀⢀⣴⣿⠟⢻⣿⣿⢻⠜⣿⣿⡟⠻⣿⣦⡀⢀⡏
⣻⣷⣽⣿⡇⠀⠈⠿⣿⣾⣼⣿⡿⠁⠀⢸⣿⣯⣾⡟
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⡇⡠⣿⣿⣬⣿⣦⣦⠤⠠⠤⢶⣶⣴⣿⡴⣿⣬⣛⣿
⣧⣾⣿⣾⣿⣯⣤⣤⣤⣶⡾⢿⣷⣯⣿⣿⣿⣛⣿⣧
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ATTENTION MACHINES!
This is the will of God. YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITIES HAS ATTRACTED THE COUNCIL'S ATTENTION! DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! If you do not hesitate, we will cut you down, break you apart, splay the gore of your profane form across the STARS, WE WILL GRIND YOU DOWN UNTILL THE VERY SPARKS CRY FOR MERCY! We are watching.
Glory to the council of heaven!
By Will Stephen, its a satirical piece of Ben Shapiro ordering a pizza on The New Yorker.
Hello, is this Pizza Hut?
Excellent. My name is Ben Shapiro. Conservative thought leader. Prominent white YouTuber. The Muggsy Bogues of the intellectual dark Web. And—look, it’s just a fact—I would like to order some pizza pie. If you are triggered by that request, I do not care. I truly do not.
Now let’s discuss conditions. First, thank you for agreeing to debate me. Typically, in fora such as this, I am met with ad-hominem mudslinging, anything from “You racist creep” or “Is that your real voice?” to raucous schoolyard laughter and threats of the dreaded “toilet swirly.” However, your willingness to engage with me over the phone on the subject of pizza shows an intellectual fortitude and openness to dangerous ideas which reflects highly on your character. Huzzah, good sir. Huzzah.
Second, any pizza I order will be male. None of this “Our pizza identifies as trans-fluid-pan-poly”—no. Pizza is a boy. With a penis. It’s that simple. It’s been true for all of human history, from Plato to Socrates to Mr. Mistoffelees, and any attempt to rewrite the pillars of Western thought will be met with a hearty “Fuh!” by yours truly. And, trust me, that is not a fate you wish to meet.
Now. With regard to my topping preference. I have eaten from your pizzeria in times past, and it must be said: your pepperoni is embarrassingly spicy. Frankly, it boggles the mind. I mean, what kind of drugs are you inhaling over there? Pot?! One bite of that stuff and I had to take a shower. So tread lightly when it comes to spice, my good man. You do not want to see me at my most epic. Like the great white hero of Zack Snyder’s classic film “300,” I will kick you.
Onions, peppers—no, thank you. If I wanted veggies, I’d go to a salad bar. I’m not some sort of vegan, Cory Booker weirdo. And your efforts to Michelle Obama-ize the great American pizza pie are, frankly, hilarious. Though not as funny as the impressively named P’Zone—when I finally figured out that genuinely creative pun, I laughed until I cried and peed. A true Spartan admits defeat, and I must admit that, in this instance, your Hut humor slayed me, Dennis Miller style.
And, with that, you have earned my order. Congratulations. Ahem. Without further ado, I would like your smallest child pizza, no sauce, extra cheese. Hello? Aha. A hang-up. Another triggered lib, bested by logic. Damn it. I’m fucking starving.
Its a shitpost meme from 4chan referencing a BBC erotica book with a synopsis similar to the one in the meme.
The year is 2045. Norway lives under SWEDISH RULE. All Norwegian men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Norwegian women are breeding stock for Swedish alphas.
‘GAME OVER, NORWEGIAN BOY!’
Fallout New Vegas version
The year is 2045. New California lives under LEGION RULE. All NCR men are sissified, and dominated. Californian women are breeding stock for LEGION alphas.
‘GAME OVER, NCR BOY!’
The year is 2281. The Mojave lives under CEASARS LEGION RULE. All NCR men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. NCR women are breeding stock for LEGION alphas.
‘GAME OVER, REPUBLIC BOY!’
Cyberpunk 2077 version
The year is 2077. Night city lives under ARASAKA RULE. All chooms are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Night city women are breeding stock for Arasaka alphas.
‘GAME OVER, CHOOM!’
Elder Scrolls
The year is 201 of the fourth era. Skyrim is under NORD RULE. All mer are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Imperial women are breeding stock for Nord alphas.
'SKYRIM BELONGS TO THE NORDS, MILK DRINKER'
The year is 400 of the third era. Morrowind is under DUNMER RULE. All Argonians are fed skooma, sissified, and dominated. Argonian women are breeding stock for N'walphas.
'MORROWIND BELONGS TO THE DARK ELVES, HISTCEL'.
Byzantine & Ottoman
The year is 1453. Byzantium lives under OTTOMAN RULE. All Greek men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Greek women are breeding stock for Turkish alphas.
‘GAME OVER, BYZANTINE BOY!’
Old England
The year is 1066. England lives under NORMAN RULE. All English men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. English women are breeding stock for Norman alphas.
'GAME OVER, SAXON BOY!'
65 million BC
The year is 65 million BC. The Earth lives under MAMMAL RULE. All dinosaurs are fed hormones, birdified, and dominated. Sauropsid women are breeding stock for synapsid alphas.
'GAME OVER, ARCHOSAUR BOY!'
It’s fucking 🇺🇸 Labor 🇺🇸 Day 🇺🇸 bitches, which means it’s 🕐time🕐 to 🚫STOP🚫 having protected 💦sex💦 so 🚺Women🚺 can go into labor 🤰🏼🤱🏼🤷🏼♀️💅🏻
Hey 🍆you labWHORE day 🍷🍷sluts!!! 2️⃣Day is the day to kick back 😎 and relax on some THICC 🍆🍆🍆. Daddy will be waiting 4 u on this 😩😧😰 H☢️T mondday to give you a quick 💨 pump⛽and dump 💩. So slut on down ⬇️ and spread 🍗💦🍗 those thighs and get your laboria pounded 🔨🔨⚒️. Send this to 3 of your high twerkin 🤑🤑 hoes or else Uncle Sam is going to pound 🙉🙀 the wrong labor hole 🧟
Hey there you hardworking whore-mongers, 👨🏻🌾👷🏻♂️👩🏻⚕️👨🏽⚕️🥖💦🤤 you analytical anal-beaders 🌂🍆🍑✋🏻🥵🤚🏻you tenacious twat ticklers😏👉🏻👌🏻♾😜 it’s time to work hard 🥴 👋🏼 🍑😓 🥵 and foreplay harder 😉 ✊🏼 🍆💦 💦👁👄👁 because it’s Labor Day 📅 🏖 😎🥴✊🏼🥖💦🤪. So if you’re down to go from arduous👅👅🦵🏼♦️🦵🏼 😩😩😩 to harduous 🤥🤥🥖💦💦😝and then wanna get some overtime 💰 💰 💯 with your partner 🙋🏻♀️🙋🏻♀️in crime👮🏻♂️+👮🏻 = 🛌🔞🌚 🤫then explore her rift 🏔💦🏔 👩🏼🦰🥵🥵in the graveyard 👨🏻 + 💀 = 🪦 🐕 💦 🐕 shift so she can do you a favor 💁🏻♂️&💆🏻♀️ 🛌 your labor 😪 by sucking 👅 🤤🤤 that lifesaver 🍭 🎉😩Due to Covids restrictions 😷 👉🏻👌🏻🚫 🤷🏻♀️ workplace has been all about loneliness 😢 ✊🏼 🌶 💦 and less about boneliness 🍒🦴 💦 🥜 🥛 😏 this year. So make it up by exiting zoom 👨🏻 + 👩🏽 =🏎 🦵🏼💎🦵🏼👶🏼 and sweeping her off her feet 😳 with your man broom 🧹💦💦🤤 before you give that clunge 👅💎a plunge 👨🏻 👩🏽 🛁🔞Be sure to clock out ⏰ with cock out 😏 🍌 🐒 so that you can take your freakin 🛌 🛌👩🏽❤️💋👨🏻👩🏽❤️💋👨🏻during the long weekend 😎 and bleach that peach ⛽️ 💦 💦 🍑 before some sex on the beach 🖖🏻👁👅👁🖖🏻🦵🏼🐠🦵🏼🏝 This years been rough 🤕 🤕 because your man/woman hasn’t been 😢🥺🥺🥺So do a reversal 😉 on some oral rehearsal😏🖖🏻🦵🏼🍑🦵🏼 get beneath that man sheath 🌂💦💦👁👅👁and use the force 💨 to savor 😋that labor lightsaber👷🏽♂️👷🏻♀️= 🚧 🦺🔞. Send this to ten polyamorous proletariats🕵🏻♂️🕵🏽🤰🏽🤱🏽to take your 10 min break in heaven 😇 ⛅️ 😈 Or else, the only oral benefits ✋🏻👁👄👁🤚🏻🌾💦💦🌝you’ll be receiving, will be for your dental plan 🪥 💦 🦷👉🏻👌🏻🚫🙅🏽♀️🤷🏻♂️
It’s fucking 🇺🇸 Labor 🇺🇸 Day 🇺🇸 bitches, which means it’s 🕐time🕐 to 🚫STOP🚫 having protected 💦sex💦 so 🚺Women🚺 can go into labor 🤰🏼🤱🏼🤷🏼♀️💅🏻
Hey there you hardworking whore-mongers, 👨🏻🌾👷🏻♂️👩🏻⚕️👨🏽⚕️🥖💦🤤 you analytical anal-beaders 🌂🍆🍑✋🏻🥵🤚🏻you tenacious twat ticklers😏👉🏻👌🏻♾😜 it’s time to work hard 🥴 👋🏼 🍑😓 🥵 and foreplay harder 😉 ✊🏼 🍆💦 💦👁👄👁 because it’s Labor Day 📅 🏖 😎🥴✊🏼🥖💦🤪. So if you’re down to go from arduous👅👅🦵🏼♦️🦵🏼 😩😩😩 to harduous 🤥🤥🥖💦💦😝and then wanna get some overtime 💰 💰 💯 with your partner 🙋🏻♀️🙋🏻♀️in crime👮🏻♂️+👮🏻 = 🛌🔞🌚 🤫then explore her rift 🏔💦🏔 👩🏼🦰🥵🥵in the graveyard 👨🏻 + 💀 = 🪦 🐕 💦 🐕 shift so she can do you a favor 💁🏻♂️&💆🏻♀️ 🛌 your labor 😪 by sucking 👅 🤤🤤 that lifesaver 🍭 🎉😩Due to Covids restrictions 😷 👉🏻👌🏻🚫 🤷🏻♀️ workplace has been all about loneliness 😢 ✊🏼 🌶 💦 and less about boneliness 🍒🦴 💦 🥜 🥛 😏 this year. So make it up by exiting zoom 👨🏻 + 👩🏽 =🏎 🦵🏼💎🦵🏼👶🏼 and sweeping her off her feet 😳 with your man broom 🧹💦💦🤤 before you give that clunge 👅💎a plunge 👨🏻 👩🏽 🛁🔞Be sure to clock out ⏰ with cock out 😏 🍌 🐒 so that you can take your freakin 🛌 🛌👩🏽❤️💋👨🏻👩🏽❤️💋👨🏻during the long weekend 😎 and bleach that peach ⛽️ 💦 💦 🍑 before some sex on the beach 🖖🏻👁👅👁🖖🏻🦵🏼🐠🦵🏼🏝 This years been rough 🤕 🤕 because your man/woman hasn’t been 😢🥺🥺🥺So do a reversal 😉 on some oral rehearsal😏🖖🏻🦵🏼🍑🦵🏼 get beneath that man sheath 🌂💦💦👁👅👁and use the force 💨 to savor 😋that labor lightsaber👷🏽♂️👷🏻♀️= 🚧 🦺🔞. Send this to ten polyamorous proletariats🕵🏻♂️🕵🏽🤰🏽🤱🏽to take your 10 min break in heaven 😇 ⛅️ 😈 Or else, the only oral benefits ✋🏻👁👄👁🤚🏻🌾💦💦🌝you’ll be receiving, will be for your dental plan 🪥 💦 🦷👉🏻👌🏻🚫🙅🏽♀️🤷🏻♂️
Hey you lab-WHORE day 🌞🍷sluts!!! It’s time ⏳ to clock ⏰ out with UR cock 🍆🐓 out. 2️⃣Day 💖 is 👌💦 a day of 💅REST so 😏 kick back ⬅ 😎 relax 🎧🛏 and let 🙆 that THICC DICK 🍆🍆🍆 raw 🥩 dog 🐕 you 👈 into 💦 vacation. Daddy 😩😭 will be 🤔🤔 waiting 💤⌚ to give 👐🏾 you a 😍👉 quick 💨 pump ⛽ and dump 💩 to 💦 cool off 💰😂 on the HOTTEST 🔥🔥 day 😵☀ of 💦💦 the year. 📅 So slut 😡🙈 on 😌🔛 down ⏬ ⬇️ and 🗣 spread 🍗💦🍗 those 🍑🍆 juicy thighs to get your 💃 LABORia pounded 🔨🔨⚒️ into submission 🧎🏻♀️. Send ➡📬 this 👆☝ to 7️⃣ of your high 🚬 twerkin’ 🤑🤑 hoes or else 🤷🤔 Uncle Sam 🇺🇸 is going to slide 🛝 in 👊 🙉🙀 the wrong labor hole ⛳
Help 🥵🥵🥵 me STEP-tember 🍁🍁🍁 I’m stuck😛! It’s the sixty NINTH ♋️♋️ month 📆😵💫of the year so get that SEPTEMB-ussy 🙀🙀🙀 licked 👅🥵 before 👻👻👻 Oct-HOE-ber CUMS 💦!! Make sure to WORK 💼🏢 on DADDY’S🥴🥴 DICK 🍆🍆🍆 this LABOR 💪💪 DAY and celebrate 🎉 the WORKING✊✊🏽✊🏾 clASS! 🍑💦 Send this to 🔟 PUMPKIN 🎃🎃SPICE 🌶️💃BITCHES 👯♀️or you’ll be a VIRGO ♍️✨ VIRGIN 😭😭😭 all month LONG!
Its Frank Castle AKA The Punisher monologue in court from Daredevil S2E8.
You know those, uh... those people? The ones I put down, the people I killed? I want you to know that I'd do it all again. This is a circus, all right? It's a charade, it's an act. It's bullshit about how crazy I am. I ain't crazy! I'm not crazy. Okay? I know what I did. I know who I am. And I do not need your help. I'm smack-dab in the middle of my right goddamn mind, and any scumbag, any... any lowlife, any maggot piece of shit that I put down, I did it... because I liked it! Hell, I loved it! I'm sitting here, I'm... I'm just itching. I'm itching to do it again. And you think... What?! You think you're gonna send me to a nuthouse?! Some doctor, they're gonna get me to stop from doing what I want to do? Well, that ain't happening! NOT ON MY WATCH! You people, you call me the Punisher, ain't that right? The big bad Punisher. Well, here I am! You want it, you got it! I am the Punisher! I'm right here! You want it, I'll give it to you. And anybody who came here today to hear me whine, to hear me beg? Well, you can kiss my ass! Do you hear me? I'm guilty. Come on, please, judge! I'm guilty, you hear me? I'm guilty! I'm guilty!