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How about you man up, and after your 9-5 hop on warframe from 5-9

    Pfft, you play games to have fun? How about you man up, and after your 9-5 hop on warframe from 5-9. Grab your Khora/Nekros/Nova and go do SP survival for 2,147,483,520 Argon like an actual gamer.

I'm so tired of these casual gamers ruining games with their stupid ass "fun." If you want fun, go play some baby low skill game like League of Lameass. Warframe is all about collecting copious amounts of argon. It's the true end game, the only resource that you can never keep capped off. Why do you think DE made it degrade away? Because they designed this game for true, hardcore, 6 pack wielding, thunder thigh clapping, ass cheek clenching gamers. They designed this game for only the truest of gamers, the basest of based, the conniesuer of assets!

I've dedicated my life to this game, just like the Gods of DE intended. Divorced, lost the children, fired from my job, evicted from my home, but DE knew their game required such dedication that they even moved it to mobile. Now I play, fueled by potato batteries I scrapped from the McDonald's dumpsters using their spoiled French fries and broken ice cream machine parts as my iPhone 3.1415926535 burns hot in my hand, each of its insignificant diodes desperately move it's electrons into holes, gallium and silicon, P and N types in a perfect dance, puppeteered by DE's divine programming.

Fuck you. Fuck your fun. Praise be to our divine lords and ladies at DE. WE ARE BUT PATHETIC SWINE, WRITHING AS WE FATTEN OUR PATHETIC ASSHOLES FOR THE GRAND REAPING THAT WILL COME! STUFFED FULL OF ARGON, WE'LL BLEED LIKE PREGNANT SOWS, BURSTING FROM THE SEAMS LIKE WE WERE FACE TROUGHED BY A DE FACE HUGGER. OUR BELLIES WILL RIPEN AND BURST, AND THEN, AND ONLY THEN, WILL DE FINALLY BLESS US WITH THE SLIGHTEST FEELING OF, "that was an okay experience I guess."

    Mario the Idea vs Mario the Man

      Mario Essay script

      Originated from the “Mario essay” meme video where the word ‘perchance’ was used extensively.

      Everyone knows Mario is cool as fuck. But who knows what he's thinking? Who knows why he crushes turtles? And why do we think about him as fondly as we think of the mythical (nonexistent?) Dr Pepper? Perchance

I believe it was Kant who said "Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play." Mario exhibits experience by cruising turts all day, but he exhibits theory by stating "Lets-ago!" Keep it up, baby!

When Mario leave his place of safety to stomp a turty, he knows that he bay Die. And yet, for a man who can purchase lives with money, a life becomes a mere store of value. A tax that can be paid for, much as a rich man feels any law with a fine is a price. We think of Mario as a hero but he is simply a one percenter of a more privileged variety. The lifekind, Perchance

      Rise and shine, Mr. Freeman

        From the opening sequence of Half-Life 2 where The G-Man woke up Freeman.

        Rise and shine, Mr. Freeman. Rise and shine. Not that I wish to imply you have been sleeping on the job. No one is more deserving of a rest. And all the effort in the world would have gone to waste until...well, let's just say your hour has come again. The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world. So, wake up, Mr. Freeman. Wake up and smell the ashes.
        Rise and shine...

Not that I wish to imply that you have been sleeping on the job. No one is more deserving of a rest, and all the effort in the world would have gone to waste until...

Well... Lets just say your hour has come again.

The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.

So, wake up Mr. Freeman.

Wake up and... Smell the ashes.
        Rise and shine, Mr. Freeman. Rise and … shine. Not that I wish … to imply that you have been sleeping on … the job. No one is more deserving of a rest, and all the effort in the world would have gone to waste until … well … let’s just say your hour has come again. The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference … in the world. So, wake up, Mister Freeman. Wake up and … smell the ashes.

        This server has done nothing but bring me down as a person.

          Originated from a user quitting a custom Minecraft or Discord server around 2019 and had since became a copypasta. 

          This server has done nothing but bring me down as a person. everyday i come in here and all you do is tear me down insult me hurt me with your words and do nothing but harm me emotionally physically mentally and I just can’t take it any longer this server is so abusive and toxic it’s crazy. no one even realizes how disgusting all of your behaviors are. every single time I talk or type or even do anything or interact with anyone in the server everybody just goes against me and gangs up on me like a pack of wolves and just attacks me and i didn’t do anything to deserve these attacks and these hurtful words. i literally just try to be nice to everybody but nobody ever wants to be in my shoes and nobody ever tries to sympathize with me and see where I’m coming from all of you just see me as the enemy and as the bad guy that’s trying to ruin the server or something when really I’m just trying to spread positivity. you guys act like I’m some kind of virus or disease, constantly casting me out so much, making me feel so left out and so alone in this server. it’s fucking driving me insane I feel mental and I feel like a weirdo just being around all of you because of how you treat me. at this point in time, I’ve given up on ever trying again and ever becoming any of your friends because I just know your feelings towards me clearly. i know all of you hate me and never want to be around me again or never have anything to do with me. it’s clear that you all think I’m a joke and that I’m stupid, idiotic and boring. it’s so mean because I literally don’t do anything to you guys but you guys always act like you hate me and it makes me feel so confused because I don’t know what I did to deserve it. I feel like I should just leave because clearly nobody wants to be around me and everyone would be happier if i left anyways so i’ll just go and i hope all of you find happiness in life and i’m sorry for all the troubles i’ve ever put any of you through. i give up. goodbye.

          Tim Walz as VP

            👩🏾‍💼 KAMALAH HARRIS 👩🏽‍🏫 just SLID into the DMs 📥 of TIM WALZ 🍑 like “hey there DADDY 🍆😏 you ready to help me pump 🇺🇸 some serious CUMpetence into this country?” 💦💦💦🔥 Who knew politics could be soooo sexy? 💋💋 Make no mistake, this TICKET is ready to RIDE 🔥🔥 and PLEASURE 👅 the nation like never before 🍌We’re talking about some serious VICE PRESIDENTIAL action 👀🍑that’ll have voters dripping like it’s a HOT SUMMER NIGHT 🌙🔥💦 If you don't get TURNED ON by their power COUPLE vibes ☄️💥👩🏽‍❤️‍👨🏽, you must be a LAME DICK! 🍆💔 Time to get THOSE VOTES UP and let Kamala SPANK 💥 up some real change 🔥 or else you’ll be left hanging with the leftovers 🍗🍩 Like STAY IN YOUR LANE, 'cause these two are ready to SLAY💅🏽👊🏽 Send this to 6️⃣ of your hottest political BANGERS🍆🔥🍑 and let’s get this party STARTED! 🎉🔥💦 
            🇺🇸🇺🇸 OUR CUNTRY🐱🐱 TITS🍈🍈 OF THEE 😩😩 WE HAVE A NEW VEE PEE PICK 🧓🏻🧓🏻❗️‼️ FUTURE CUNTMANDER🫡🫡 IN CHIEF CUMALA💦 HARRIS🥥🌴 HAS PICKED🫨 TIMMY STIMMY🍆 WALZ FROM THE 👄🫦LAND OF 10,000 💦LICKS 👅👅👅 AS HER VPENIS 🍆🥵🇺🇸RUNNING MATE FOR THE 🍑🐱🍆SLUTTIEST🫨😩 TICKET🎟️😮‍💨 IN THIS YEARS GENERAL ERECTION🙂‍↕️🫡💦🍆 AFTER WEEKS OF EDGING 😩😫 AND DICK🥵 🍆SUCKING 🫢🥵 FROM ALL HER POSSIBLE WHITE BOY CANDIDATES, THE STATISDICKS 🍆💦📈 SHOWED THAT TIM WALZ BIG🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ BALLS 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️WAS THE MAN FOR THE👅👅 RIM JOB💦 👅😩AND WILL BE ANNOUNCED AT THE DEMOCLITIC🐱🫦 CUMVENTION💦💦 SO GET READY TO POKÉMON HOE➡️➡️ TO THE POLES💈💃 AND STUFF THAT🕳️ TIGHT 😵‍💫WET🌊💧🐟 BALLOT🗳️ BOX 😵‍💫🗳️WITH YOUR VOTE SO WE CAN SHOW THOSE 🤡🤡 REPUBLICUNTS 🤡🤡 HOW BIG KAMALA’S MOMMY😩 DOMMY⛓️ DICK🍆🍆🍆 IS 👀AND FIST👊🍑 THEM WITH LIBERTY🇺🇸🗽 AND JUSTITS 🍈🍈FOR ALL‼️‼️‼️ WITH STIM WALZ 📈📈 BY HER SIDE CUMALA WILL POP💥 HER🍑 PUSSY🐱 ALL THE WAY TO THE HOEVAL😩😩😩 OFFICE 🇺🇸🫡💦 BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME JOSH 💦SHAPUSSY🐈‍⬛🐱😹‼️

DONT🚫🚫🙅🙅 BE A COCONUT TREE 🥥🌴🥥🌴 COCK🅱️LOCK🚫🍆🚫🍆 SHARE THIS WITH 🔟 OF THE SLUTTIEST🥵‼️‼️‼️ POLE🗳️🗳️💈💃 WORKERS YOU KNOW AND MAKE SURE THEY’RE 🧑‍💻🧑‍💻 REGISTERED TO HOE-TE☑️📝✍️ OR ELSE BAD LUCK 🐈‍⬛🐈‍⬛ WILL CUM💦 FOR YOU QUICKER THAN JD VANCE’S TINY 🤏🤏🤏🤏🤏LIMP DICK🍆 BETWEEN TWO 🛋️🛋️COUCH CUSHIONS 🛋️🥵🫦
            🍑🚨 KAMALA HARRIS JUST HUMPED 🐶 TIM WALZ IN THE VP RACE 🏁💦 Get ready to BEND OVER MINNESOTA because they’re about to SLAY SOME POLITICAL PUSSY 🌊💦 Kamala’s got her EYE on that WALZ and he’s about to RIDE THAT COCK 🚴‍♂️🍆 all the way to the WHITEHOUSE! 🏛️💥 I hope you’re ready to get FREAKY in St. Paul, because Tim's trying to STUFF THAT BALLOT 🗳️ 🍗 like it’s Thanksgiving 🤭💋 It's about to be an ERECT-tion like never before! 💦 Get those votes IN, or be left OUT of this 🤪 DOMINATING DANCE. 💃📅 It's a SINFUL showdown of MISS KAMALA and TIMMY WALTZ, so tighten up your THONGS 👙🍌 and make those votes COUNT or you'll be SORRY in a BLUE BALLS election! 💙💧 
            🎉 OH HELL 💦 YEAH, Kamala 👩🏽💼 Harris just picked 🥳 the WALTZin' MAN, Tim Walz 🌪️🍑 as her VP date! 🍾💦 To the WINDOW, to the WALZ 🌈💥, sweat drips down my BALZ 🍑💦💦, I'm talking about them STEAMY 😏💦 debates 🔥🗣️ where they get to BUMP and GRIND 👯‍♂️national policies and her agenda in the OVAL OFFICE 🏛️! So if you wanna GET DOWN 💃🏽👅 with some political spice, send this to 3️⃣ sexy friends 👯‍♀️ or get ready for a POLITICAL BLUEBALLS ⚽🙅‍♂️! When they mix 💦 those votes📊 with that ASS LOWDASOS 🍑💥, we be really CUMmencing 💦 the FUN-TIMES across Minnesota 🌆🍌! Vote WALTZ or get your ASS KICKED! 🥋🍑💦💦💦 
            KAMALA🥥HARRIS🌴🤣 JUST 👏😤SLAPPED ❄️MINNESOTA🥶 GOVERNOR 🥸 TIM WALZ ON THAT TICKET 🍑🔥FOR VICE PRESI-DICK🍆😎. WHO KNEW A LITTLE WALTZ 🕺💃 COULD GET US ALL SO HOT AND STEAMY? 🔥😈 SEND THIS TO 5️⃣ SEXY DEMOCRATS WHO NEED A VICE ON THEIR STICK 🍆🍑 OR YOU’LL MISS OUT ON THE NEXT HOT MEETING 🔥💼🍾😏

            My name is Itadori Yuji. I’m 15 years old.

              Its a parody of the “My name is Yoshikage Kira” copypasta but changed to Yuji from Jujutsu Kaisen.

              My name is Itadori Yuji. I'm 15 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Sendai, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an sorcerer for the Jujutsu High, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.