Own a Gladius for home defense, since that is what the founders of Rome intended. Four plebeians break into my home. "By Jove!" as I replace my Toga with a Galea and grab my Pila and Gladius. Leave a golf ball sized wound in the first man, he is dead on the spot. Throw my other Pilum at the second man, miss him entirely because he is too far and nail the neighbour's dog. I have to resort to the Onager at the top of the stairs loaded with pots of Greek Fire, "Roma Invicta!" as the Greek Fire burns two men to a crisp, the roaring sound and out of control fire sucking up all the oxygen. Strap my Scutum to my arm and charge the last terrified plebeian. He bleeds out waiting for the police to arrive since Gladius wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founders of Rome intended.
Deoxys really is the perfect pokemon to have sex with if you think about it. Speed form if you want a quickie💨, attack form if you want something rough 👀, defense form if you into them Muslims, and normal mode for vanilla stuff. Also bet Deoxys is good with those tentacles 😍 , wrapping around you as you finger her alien fuzzy, while her tentacles penetrate you buttocks, while also stroking your Willy Wonka...
How do I get my husband to stop going ‘Goblin Mode’ during sex?
TLDR; My husband says ‘Goblin Mode activated’ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says ‘Goblin Mode off’ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward.
I really love my husband and he’s always been great in bed. But recently he’s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in ‘Goblin Mode’. We didn’t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. He’s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, he’s been a little emotionally unwell. I’ve heard him muttering, ‘Goblin’ repeatedly when he didn’t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said ‘Goblin Mode activated’, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex I’ve ever had, but I’m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice?
Edit: The problem isn’t the ‘Goblin Mode’, it’s that he could be ill
Hey 🙋♀️ you SICK 🤒 fucking SLUTS 🤗 I’m positive with COVID-19 🦠😒 But you’re ➕ positively 🧪 a HOEVID-69 ☯️😍 I know you got it 🤧 because you love ❤️ licking 😋 BUTTHOLES 🌟🤩 and SUCKING tongues. 👅 But use caution ⚠️ when giving 😛 a BLUMPKIN 🚽 because this virus 🦠 is scarier 😱 than any PUMPkin 🎃⛽️ Mask up 😷 when going in raw 🌽 And be sure to withdraw 💦💦💦 because we don’t want 🚫 NO Covid babies 🚫🙅🏽♀️🫃this Holiday🎄you HOE!🎅🏼Take lots of Vitamin D 🍆 and guzzle down 🥵 plenty of FLUIDS🥛💦 because the only cure 💊💊 for this sickness 🤕 is mammie’s🧍♀️THIC’NESS 🍑 Now wash 🧼those hands 👏 and Sanitize those THIGHS🧴💦 pASS ⏩ this viral LOAD 🦠🦠💦 to 🔟 of the filthiest 🧌 NASTIEST whores 🏥👩⚕️ in your phone 📱🦠😘😝💀🪦
The Coronavirus are living beings too 🥺🥺🥺. They may not feel pain 🩹 nor emotions 🤗 unlike animals 🐶🐱🐮 and plants 🌱🌿 but they are conscious. Vaccines 💉💉 kill 🩸🩸 them and this endangers ⚠️ their lives. COVID-19 has the right ✊✊ to live 🧬 🧬 and using vaccines 💉💉 and medicine 💊 are cruel. I thought we humans 🙋 are better than this and are more rational ☯️☯️☯️ than any other creature 🦓🐴🐸 out there. We shouldn't ☝️☝ just kill 🔪🔪 them just because they make us sick 🤮🤢. They are just like 👍 any other animal 🦁 out ➡️➡️ there trying their best 😊 to live ☝️and survive ✊✊ this cruel world🌎. Therefore☝️it is not excused 😶😶 to kill 🔪🩸 them with medicine 💊 and vaccines💉. You 😳 wouldn't 👊 want 🙌 to see 👀 a homeless 🏚️ person get killed 😵 for stealing an apple 🍎 all because they just want to feed 🍜🍜 themselves right? Spread 💯💯 this message 📝 📝by copy 📝 and pasting this. The world 🌎 needs to know 👊👊 that this treatment 🛌 shall not be tolerated❤️🔥. Coronavirus rights ✊✊✊✊
MASKS UP😷 AND TITS OUT💯👏🙌ONLY THREE MORE COVID🦠VARIANTS🤤UNTIL SIGMA ΣΣ😩 You know what that means you 🅱OOSTED💉SLUTS👅👀 It’s time to get on that COVID Grindset™ before you get 🤯infected🍆🍆🍆by the SUPERIOR😤variant‼‼ The sixth 6️⃣wave🌊👋 is CUMMING💦💦📈🅱eta males at the bottom😓👇of the corona🍺sexual🥵 hierarchy 🏆 should ☠prepare to get FUCKED🍑🍆this time⌛ by the extra👌large🤪spike👆protein mutation☢🤤😫 Send this to 1️⃣9️⃣ of your most IMMUNO⛔COMPROMISED🚫😨😨 friends💩otherwise😳there will be💀 another VERY long📏🍆LOCK🔐DOWN🙈‼‼
Listen up 👷🏼ASSential workers👩🏾🌾👩🏽🍳hotties with 💦CUMorbid conditions like 🌬ASSthma🌬, and 65+ 👴🏽👨🏼🦳👨🏿🦳Sugar Daddies! 🔍CLITical trials 🔎are over and the 💉HOvid-19 vaccine💉 is here✅✅💯hope you are ready to get 💦🧬💦mRNAsty 💦🧬💦 Are you a 💃🏻Moderna Mami💃🏻, a 💋Pfizer Phreak 💋or a 10-inch 📏🍆Johnson&Johnson? 🍆🥵Who cares?? 🤷🏻♂️At this dick 📆appointment ⌚everyone is getting pumped 💦💦💦full of serum 💦💦💦 Sign those consent forms✍️📝this vaccine is 6️⃣9️⃣% effective ✅you’ll wake up the next day TIRED 😫😫and ACHING 🥵🥵🥵 and SORE😭😭and begging 🙏🏻to cum back in 📆TWO WEEKS 📆 for MORE🥵🥵Ready to 🐎RIDE🐎your way to 🐴🐎🐪HERD IMMUNITY? 🐄🐪🐴🐎OK COVID COWBOY🤠Send this to the 5 sluts 👩🏽🦱👩🏼👧🏽🧑🏻🦰👴🏽who will 😫😫moan 😫😫the loudest when they get 💉😳😳PENETRATED 😳😳by that🍆 BIG, 😫Hard 😱😮needle 💉💉
Your karma score has decreased by 1 after I read your comment. The fact that your account is 8 years old makes it seem like you’d be capable of wit, but your comment sounds like it was written by a medieval peasant trying to sound smart. Not your fault, per se, some of us are born this way. Hell, I’m a high functioning sociopath and I feel nothing but disdain for most of the people on Reddit for being self entitled, privileged, and milquetoast.
Source: I took psychology and morality class.
P.S. I have bipolar disorder so I might have gone a bit off at you. Same idea, though.
I really don't get hookup culture. Like there is no way that sex is that much better than just jerking off. Expecially if you don't even like the person you are doing it with. There is so much more effort to it too. First you gotta swipe on the dumb app for however long that takes and then you gotta chat up the girl enough so that she doesn't think you will murder her then you have to take your car and drive to her place only too fuck for maybe 30 min. Like why? Does anyone actually enjoy this shit? I mean I am a turbo virgin so I wouldn't know but it just seems so shit to me. Is hookup culture just for people with no hobbies or what?
