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Heirloom Ember from Warframe

    Parody of the Sex with Oblivion’s Female Flame Atronach but changed to Heirloom Ember.

    I am going to have sex with this Heirloom Ember Warframe from Warframe. I find the Heirloom Ember Warframes in Warframe sexy. However, their body is made up of 87% fire, and 100% fire surrounds them. That could kill me if I tried to have sex with one. To remedy this, the Ember Warframe casts Immolation with Immolated Radiance making me resistant to fire. Keep in mind, resistant is not the same as immune. I still take damage. It is either 2 points or 1 point of damage each second I am having sex with her. Just because a particular second caused 1 point of damage, does not mean that I mostly did not feel anything, it just means that I took one damage. I am not going to rush through having sex with this Ember Warframe, I make sure I pleasure anything I have sex with—especially infested-constructs! I'd rather take damage than not pleasure the Ember Warframe.

The Ember Warframe and I go to the Orbiter's Infirmary to have sex. When having sex with infested-constructs, it is ALWAYS sexier to have sex in their natural habitat rather than a human's natural habitat. The Orbiter's Infirmary is the Ember Warframe’s natural habitat.

Before we went into the Orbiter's Infirmary, the Ember Warframe let all the Infestation know that we are just here for sex. The Infestation will not subsume us because they know I am here at the Orbiter's Infirmary on sexual business. This includes the Helminth strain. However, the Helminth thinks that I am going to be an easy recruit for becoming a test subject of Executor Ballas considering that I am having sex with an Ember Warframe. However, I have no interest in becoming an Infested.

    Very big achievement. Now do one thing please. Look outside

      From a comment by a Redditor after someone posted on r/Brawlstars where they’ve achieved the Dungeon Master title after grinding continuously for 4 days.

      Very big achievement. Now do one thing please. Look outside, and think about how long u were sitting hunchbacked on ur table grinding Wasting the hours away while your sleep deprivation got to your brain. Couldn’t remember what was the point of your existence, ur brain starts to feel mushy and you keep on going. People out there don’t even have the chance of going outside. You do. Think about this, think about it deep.

      Hi there. I’m Cody.

        Started from a Tiktok video that got deleted, a reupload of the original in a YT skit can be found here.

        Hi there. I'm Cody. Pronouns e/em/eir/eirs or xe/xem/xyr/xyrs or really any neopronouns that aren't ze/hir/hirs. I am a white, transmasculine, fem, nonbinary, temporarily mostly able-bodied, neurodivergent, obsessive compulsive, chronically ill, culturally Jewish, Unitarian Universalist, nonmonogamous, demilowromantic, greydemibisexual, survivor of acute and complex trauma, millennial, and cat parent in mental health recovery.

        Total Furry Death

          Parody of the infamous TND copypasta but changed to furries. 

          Kill furries. Behead furries. Roundhouse kick a furry into the concrete. Slam dunk a fur-blood into the trashcan. Crucify filthy furries. Defecate in a furry’s food. Launch furries into the sun. Stir fry furries in a wok. Toss furries into active volcanoes. Urinate into a furry’s gas tank. Judo throw furries into a wood chipper. Twist furries’ heads off. Report furries to the Wizards’ Council. Karate chop furries in half. Curb stomp pregnant non-human furries. Trap furries in quicksand. Crush furries in the trash compactor. Liquefy furries in a vat of acid. Eat furries. Dissect furries. Exterminate furries in the gas chamber. Stomp furry skulls with steel toed boots. Cremate furries in the oven. Lobotomize furries. Mandatory abortions for furries. Grind furry fetuses in the garbage disposal. Drown furries in fried chicken grease. Vaporize furries with anti-matter. Kick old furries down the stairs. Feed furries to alligators. Slice furries with a katana.

          I am top tier LS player in Rise/Sunbreak and World

            From the comment section of a dude fighting Gore Magala daily (Day 52). He made a comment saying that the OP has a long way to go, prompting another fellow to respond “he’s better than you,” which led to this copypasta.

            (LOL...) I am top tier LS player in Rise/Sunbreak and World... I have easily over 6k hunts with it alone... and just as many with Switch Axe--- it goes without saying, with around 5300+ hours played in 1 game + expansion alone, it's fair to say I know more than 99% of the player base, in both knowledge of monsters, weaknesses, Openings, Attack Patterns, etc. and how to deal with him as they are thrown at me.... Most people play MH for 300-800 hours and think they know everything... lol while in reality, they know a very small amount... a mere fraction of what I and my fellow speed- runners invest... Who know nearly all the ins- and outs of any hunt, the do's the do not's...

I have the experience I can see a beginner or someone at maybe 20-30% of true mastery like such display here. Not saying there's anything wrong with it--it's only to be expected to be REALLY GOOD you need A LOT of Experience, and Dedication, and some lucky armor/ charm rolls... (lol) it isn't going to come overnight.

Try not to take things so personally, I am blunt and to the point, with most of my comments, if I like it, you will know, if there's a lot of work to improve on, you will know... But don't assume I am some noob just talking shit---quite the opposite, I could kill it in likely 4 minutes or less, and before you retort and with a cheeky comment like: "Why don't you prove it then" (I play on steam deck, I don't record or upload shit, except for funny wtf moments and glitches) very occasionally on games I play on playstation only, because it's possible for me to do so on there... (So that's answered before you get the chance to say it...)

Anyways, I hope he continues to play the best weapon out there and improve a little bit, with each hunt...

            I’m sick of Chixia

              Chixia from Wuthering Waves

              Parody of the Xiangling copypasta but switched to Chixia from Wuthering Waves and the context has been swapped to how mid she is.

              I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Chixia. I try to play Mortefi. Gatcha gives me Chixia. I try to play Danjin. Gatcha gives me Chixia. I want to play Yinlin. I lost my pity because I kept getting Chixias while fishing for Mortefi. I just want S4 Mortefi or Danjin. I've gotten nothing but Chixia and off banner weapons for 10 of my 28 pages of pulls.

Chixia grabs me by the throat. I don't level her at all because she's bad. She isn't satisfied. I won't even unequip the grey weapon she came with. "Level me and I'll stop showing up in your pulls" She tells me. "Check Prydwen, DPS is only 20% less than Calcharo's now that I'm S5" She grabs my entire 5 star roster and benches them "Ignore that I'm single target only, the damage numbers are okay"

I can't pull anymore, I'm out of Astrites and I still want Yinlin. She grabs my credit card. It declines. "Guess this is the end." She grabs the rate up and says “Drop another off banner 4 star weapon” There is no hint of sadness in her eyes. Nothing but wasted pity for a mid 4 star carry. What a cruel world.