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I saw Aaron Paul at an unemployment office in Los Angeles

    Started from a comment on Reddit parodying the “Flying Lotus at a grocery store in LA” story but changed to fit the Xbox One: Aaron Paul ad.

    I saw Aaron Paul at an unemployment office in Los Angeles yesterday. I noticed him but didn’t want to bother him. He obviously saw me because he came up to me. He said, “Please let me give you an autograph, yo, bitch. Please respond.” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “Please respond. Please respond. Xbox, please respond. Bitch.” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my day, and I heard him crying as I walked off. When I came to apply up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen job applications in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be busy and read scripts, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the forms and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually because “I just wish I had more time to play,” and then turned around and cried at me. I don’t even think that’s a career. After she scanned each form and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by saying “Xbox turn on” really loudly.

    Here’s the information about CLR GTR

      IG meme accounts copy and paste this as their captions to get the of attention of car fans, which ultimately raises their views. Another theory is that these accounts are ran by bots and putting this copypasta gets lots of views hence they bots keep copying each other.

      No problem! Here’s the information about the Mercedes CLR GTR:

The Mercedes CLR GTR is a remarkable racing car celebrated for its outstanding performance and sleek design. Powered by a potent 6.0-liter V12 engine, it delivers over 600 horsepower. 🔧

Acceleration from 0 to 100 km/h takes approximately 3.7 seconds, with a remarkable top speed surpassing 320 km/h. 🥇

Incorporating advanced aerodynamic features and cutting-edge stability technologies, the CLR GTR ensures exceptional stability and control, particularly during high-speed maneuvers. 💨

Originally priced around $1.5 million, the Mercedes CLR GTR is considered one of the most exclusive and prestigious racing cars ever produced. 💰

Its limited production run of just five units adds to its rarity, making it highly sought after by racing enthusiasts and collectors worldwide. 🌎

      No problem Here's the information about CLR GTR: The Mercedes CLR GTR is a remarkable racing car celebrated for its outstanding performance and sleek design. Powder by a potent 6.0-liter V12 engine, it delivers over 600 horsepower.🔧 Acceleration from 0 to 100km/h takes approximately 3.7 seconds, with a remarkable top speed surpassing 320km/h. 🥇 Incorporation advanced aerodynamic features and cutting-edge stability technologies, the ClR GTR ensures exceptional stability and control, particularly during high-speed maneuvers. 💨 Originally priced around $1.5 million, the Mercedes CLR GTR is considered one of the most exclusive and prestigious racing cars ever produced. 💰 It's limited production run of just five units adds to its rarity, making it highly sought after by racing enthusiasts and collectors worldwide. 🌎

      Shinji’s Credits Rant

        From the ending credits of English dub of Neon Genesis Evangelion, Shinji Ikari’s voice actor Spike Spencer gave an in-character improvised monologue about the open-ended nature of the finale. It was only released as an Easter Egg in the series Platinum Box Set.

        Ah, just... This is nice. I- This is the end, okay... Where exactly am I? Uh...Oh, gre- here's the song, oh good. Uhm, there's still some things that are unresolved here, guys! Ho-how do I get home? Eh-what do I eat? Was Rei my...my mom, or a clone, or... Hell, was this all in my mind? What-what's an eva? Is that sort of a Freudian thing, or uh... Am I real? Aw, hell... D-does the bus run through here? I mean, I'd like to go home now, but uhm... Oh god... Where's home?! Okay, okay, okay... I mustn't run away, I mustn't run- Okay, I got that, good, okay. Now, if I were to run away, let's analyze that, where the FUCK would I go? I'm on a big blue ball... Uh, is this how you end a series? I mean, is this where we go from here? Okay, the movie better sure as hell make up for this, I'm telling you right now, cuz I'm stuck in nowhereland. You ran out of ink too, didn't you, you bastards... 
        Oh, this is- this is nice, I, uh- This is the end, okay... Where exactly am I?! Um... Oh, grea- here's the song, oh good. Uhmmm, there's some things that are still unresolved here, guys! How- How do I get home? Ah- what do I eat?? Was... Rei my- my mom, or... a clone, or... hell- was this all in my mind? What- What's an EVA? Is that- sort of a Freudian... thing, er... um... am I real? Oh, hell- does the bus run through here? I mean, I'd like to go home now, but, um... oh, God, where's home? Okay, okay, okay. I mustn't run away, I mustn't... Okay I got that, good, okay. Now, if I were to run away, let's analyze that—where the fuck would I go?! I'm on a big blue ball!! Uhh, is this how you end a series? I mean, is this- where we go from here? Okay, the movie better sure as hell make up for this, I'm telling ya right now, 'cause I'm stuck in nowhere-land... You ran outta ink too, didn't you, you bastards?

        Total Kike Death

          Parody of the ‘TND’ copypasta but changed to fit Jewish people. 

          Kill kikes. Behead kikes. Roundhouse kick a kike into the concrete. Slam dunk a kike baby into the trashcan. Blast kikes with Civil War cannons. Crucify filthy Jews. Whip kikes into obedience. Slingshot a kike into orbit. Rocket kikes into the sun. Defecate in a kikes food. Stir-fry kikes in a wok. Bite a kike and drink their blood. Toss kikes into active volcanoes. Urinate into a kike's gas tank. Judo throw kikes into the wood chipper. Unscrew a kike's head off. Report kikes to the IRS. Karate chop kikes in half. Bake kikes into kike-pizza. Arrest kikes for no reason. Electrocute kikes. Curb stomp pregnant kikes. Beat a kike up. Trap kikes in quicksand. Crush kikes in the trash compactor. Liquefy kikes in a vat of acid. Eat kikes. Dissect kikes. Exterminate kikes in the gas chamber. Slice a kike up and wear their skin. Set kikes on fire. Spin kikes around until they puke. Tie kikes to a train track. Karate kick a kike in the testicles. Stomp kike skulls with steel-toed boots. Broil kikes into a broth. Cremate kikes in the oven. Lobotomize kikes. Deep fry kikes. Grind kike fetuses in the garbage disposal. Fourth-trimester abortions for kikes. Blend kikes in a blender. Drown kikes in fried chicken grease. Vaporize kikes with a ray gun. Snap a kike's neck. Kick old kikes down the stairs. Feed kikes to alligators. Slice kikes with a katana. Put a bomb in a kike's mouth. Throw knives at kikes. Inflate kikes until they pop. Send kikes into a blackhole. Castrate kikes. Feed kikes poisoned food. Force kikes to walk the plank. Push kikes into a pit. Kneel on a kike's neck. Curse kikes with a spell. Stuff kike babies into the washing machine and turn it on. Flatten kikes with a tank. Pop a kike's car tire. Strike kike children with a ruler. Make kikes swim in the Mariana Trench. Cut off a kike's limbs. Airdrop kikes into Antarctica. Throw kikes off the boat. Pressurize kikes into fine crystals. Light fireworks in a kike's ass. Falcon-punch a kike in the face. Make kikes into fiction. Blow kikes heads off with grenade launchers. Blow kikes brains open with a sniper rifle. Lock kikes in a cage and drown them underwater. Nail kikes to a cross and stab them. Run over kikes with a tank feet-first. Throw kikes off buildings. Crush kikes with a press. Attack kikes with acid. Boil kikes in a pan. Lock kikes inside a brazen bull. Burn kikes alive. Drag kikes across a wall of spikes. Pour molten lava on kikes. Quarter kikes. Impale kikes on a pike. Send aliens to abduct kikes. Force kikes to ride the euthanasia coaster. Crush kikes with anvils. Throw kikes off of rooftops. Incinerate kikes. Starve kikes. Blow kikes up with dynamite. Gulp kikes. Feast on kike eyeballs. Cave in a kike's skull. Kiss a kike to death. Peel a kike like a banana. Wipe out kike tribes. Deny kikes into Heaven. Freeze kikes in the vacuum of space. Hard boil a kike. Lock on to kikes with a harpoon. Cryodesiccate a kike. Ferment kikes into stew. Ensnare kikes. Nark on kikes to the army. Cause a total kike purge. Jam a kike into a geyser. Axe murder a kike. Unleash Smelvin upon kikes. Put kikes on ships going to Africa and blow up the ships after they set sail. TOTAL KIKE DEATH! ABSOLUTE KIKE ANNIHILATION!.

          I, a real life Human Boy, wore a golden Christian Cross

            I, a real life Human Boy, wore a golden Christian Cross pendant to American Public School and was forced to wear crown of thorns and whipped through the American Public School hallways while teachers chanted Satanism prayers at me and students throwed human feces at me. Then the American Public School Administrator throwed me into public street gutter and said I was suspended for 6 days 6 hours 6 minutes for spreading lies of White Christ. I spoke to 7 other Straight White Male Christian students in Church who had same punishment for wearing golden Christian Cross to American Public Schools! We are being murdered by Satanists!

            Zyox copypasta collection

              I can’t take it anymore. i’m sick of zy0x

              i can't take it anymore. i'm sick of zy0x. i try to watch other genshin streamers, zy0x is more entertaining. i try to go outside and enjoy my hobbies, but i yearn to watch him skill issue in the abyss. i try to watch other content, but i miss using the AGOUBA emote. i write "haha so tall and handsome today mr socks" in a dono message. i sub with twitch prime. he isn't satisfied. he grabs me by the throat. "I'M NOT BALDING MY HAIR IS JUST THIN." he says. he plus twenties a vermillion circlet. it rolls 1554 flat HP. "guess this is the end." he grabs xiao and laments everywhere. there is no hint of sanity in his eyes. nothing but pure, no ICD stalling. what a cruel world.

              I can’t get Zyox out of my mind

              I can't get Zyox out of my mind. Yesterday I was sitting in class and I told the teacher why I was late for class and she said "ICD!', I think she meant to say "I see!". After I came back to class and I sat down, I looked in the book, it was a math class, and I saw the number 5/6, I tried to ignore it, but when I came home and loaded Genshin, I swapped to my commissions team which was Wanderer, Yelan, Kazuha, Zhongli, when I went to my first commission, "A Small Step for Hilichurls", as soon as I they got in my render distance, I saw some pyro 28 numbers on them and they instantly died, I was so confused, I googled it and I found nothing so I just left it there, thankfully none of my next commissions were combat ones and I was condensing resin for the Vermillion domain. The next day while I was going to school I heard someone say "I love men." on the phone, I shat my pants, I thought Zyox was after me, since I had shat my pants, I had to go home. When I got home I saw my mom working and she said "He's in business guys!" i nearly got a panic attack right then and there, I ran into the bathroom and held my hands to my ears, but I started to see ABOBA everywhere, he would slowly apparate in front of me while I whimpered in the corner, smelling the boiling blood of my parents, I was so scared, I heard every thundering footstep as Zyox wandered around with his 50 CV Sands, I tried to peak outside when suddenly ABOBA saw me, instantly Zyox said "OMG I'M, BLOOMING" and as I say my final words, all I can feel is the pure, no ICD, HUH application. goodbye, cruel world.

              Welcome to my incomplete zy0nix guide

              Hey guys welcome to my incomplete zy0nix guide. First of all zy0x is the only character who doesn't wield a vision, but he does wield the delusion that Xiao is tall which is very strong. I believe zy0x is best used as a 2 in 1 Genshin Impact content creator whose primary goal is to give you useful character guides off stream while also endless entertainment on stream. zy0x is a character who's calm, collected, humble, handsome, tall, charismatic, but what makes him broken, at least from my 720 hours of testing, is the fact that he's a person. therefore, the real situations where you would want to be watching zy0x over other amazing streamers, is effectively going to be when the other streamers are not streaming. I hope this guide was helpful. feel free to let me know your thoughts on zy0x and i will catch deez nuts on the next one.

              One of the content creators of all time

              Zy0x is definitely one of the content creators of all time. His guides are one of the ones I've seen. These clips are the part of my year. Without his videos, my day feels like a day. He's the most person I've ever met. His Xiao artifacts are one of the character builds I've ever seen. Undoubtedly one of the streamers in 2024.

              Who is Zy0x?

              Who is zy0x? in math: my solution, in history: my King, in art: my canvas, in science: my oxygen, in geography: my world. 
              For blind, he is the brightness, for depressed - he's hope. Hail our copium lord Zy0x and his Husband Xiao for only he farms Vermillion for 2 years and still doesn't have the best Xiao in the world. For only he can bring light to those in dark, and like he himself mentioned, put more into his mouth than just words. All Hail our copium lord and his husband Xiao.

              Oh Zy0nix, my glorious balding king

              Oh Zy0nix, my glorious balding king, you..... you are my specialz, throughout Vermillion and Echoes you alone are the Anemo Gobletless one. Stand proud Zeeox, you are strong..... because at the end of the day. You.....are. wipes tears YOU ARE MY SPECIALZ 😭😭😭

              I have a confession I just typed this because of zy0x

              I have a confession I just typed this because of zy0x. Like everyone talking about him and Xiao, when I go to YouTube I find dozen of clips for him for hsr and genshin and watched some of it , watched some videos on his channel and he was pretty composed and half of the comments were about how calm he is on stream . More videos and it's the same fucking comments like I downloaded twitch to follow him and I didn't find the hype . Surely you would stumble to his video wearing a maid dress or him moaning like a bitch or saying the weirdest shit imaginable and most his fans are so annoying to the point they lead me to stop. I'm not watching anymore

              Xiao is the best character in Genshin Impact

              Xiao is the best character in Genshin Impact and anyone who disagrees is a brainless simp. He has the coolest design, the most badass voice, the strongest skills and the deepest lore. He is not a generic edgy boy, he is a complex and tragic hero who sacrificed his happiness for the sake of Liyue. He deserves all the love and respect in the world and I will fight anyone who dares to insult him. Zy0x is my idol and I agree with everything he says about Xiao. He is the true Xiao fan and he knows more than anyone else. He is not toxic or arrogant, he is just passionate and honest. He has enlightened me with his wisdom and I will follow him to the end of time. Xiao and Zy0x are my life and I will never stop supporting them.

              Oh my god Zyox

              Oh my god Zyox. Not only did I know that you were already tall, humble, charismatic, funny, entertaining, and just... good overall, that you deserve this piece, but now, I really can see... you getting rewarded for once, when every other time you've been unlucky

              Zyox Rap

              rubber cement camping tent periodic event vice president economic rent live laugh lament

              Zeeee0x shrine

              Everytime I think my life has gone to ruin, everytime I remember I'm unemployed, everytime I remember I haven't seen sunlight or showered in 10 years, I can just look at my Zeeee0x shrine. Everyday I offer something to his majestys wonderful shrine, everyday I look at it enchantingly, and everyday I wished Zy0x was real so that he could bring salvation to us pathetic, little lamenters. Aboba, lament, om.