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We circumcise all our gorillas because the eldest gorilla is Jewish

    At my zoo, we circumcise all our gorillas because the eldest gorilla is Jewish and demands it. We can't argue with faith, and since we also shave our gorillas, we find the circumcised gorilla penises to be much more visually appealing, and I know our guests enjoy that touch as well because I've had many, many people come up to me and tell me how much they admire the penises on our shaved, Jewish gorillas, and that's when I take the opportunity to try to convert them to Judaism on the elder gorilla's behalf. I just want to make papa proud. I'd say at least a dozen or so people convert every summer, especially after the body show that the gorillas put on every 4th of July. It's part of why we shave them. We pump our gorillas up with the best bodybuilding supplements, legal and otherwise, so that they become absolutely jacked. They spend most of their time lifting weights and wrestling each other for sport and male bonding. The elder gorilla oversees the matches and presents a banana to the winner. That's what makes the body shows so popular. The elder gorilla is always very excited to show of the strength of faith instilled in his troop of Jewish, shaved, jacked gorillas. It's a very compelling argument, especially when you see how playfully those circumcised gorilla penises dangle in the morning summer sunlight, still with beads of dew clinging to that charcoal black gorilla dick skin. It's amazing what gorillas can do when they follow God's will and keep their hearts full of God's love.

    Harizzment

      i have 206 bones but when i see you i got 207
      She wasn't medusa, yet I was still rock hard when I looked at her.
      when i see you in the summer through your window without consent i bloom a liquid from my inner thoughts
      did u fart cuz u blew me away
      Thou are the majestic wip to my holy nay nay
      1 fish 2 fish red fish blue fish

      Poetic Rizz

        If you were the sun I'd continue staring even though I'd go blind, as your beauty overcomes the sense of pain I shall feel just to see you.
        Just as the autumn leaves, descend from the trees, I fall for you every season
        No pencil, no paper yet somehow you draw my attention
        No matter how glorious the stars in the night sky are, I will always watch them through your eyes
        Your presence alone will make the angels question their own perfection
        Your eyes are like clouds for even when they fill with sorrow and drown the land, they paint the sky with unimaginable beauty.
        If I had a flower for every thought of you, I could walk through my garden for eternity
        You're the moon to my tide,
        The one who pulls me by your side.
        If I got a flower for every time I thought of you I would have only one as you never left my mind, and that flower I would give to you
        As the sun comes up, you have no shadow, because there is nothing that can replicate your beauty.
        like a piece of art
        my eyes cannot help
        but gaze upon the strokes
        of which God had created
        for he created a being as
        beautiful as you
        My love I am nothing more than an empty piece of paper for your inspiration is what truly draws me near completion
        If you were the stars I would devote my life to being an astronomer, if only to begin to understand your beauty
        If you are the angel of death I'm willing to die a million times just to see your beauty. If you are the angel of life I'm willing to be immortal.
        If I had to wait my entire life for your love, I would. for when I’ve withered away, I’d be glad i got to experience heaven before I even reached it.
        And if the gods were to give me eternal life, I’d turn it down. For a world without you is no different than death itself
        when I can’t be with you I read your favorite book, listen to your favorite song, watch your favorite movie, because in them I find little bits of you
        If I were a flower and you were the wind, I would let you wither me by making my petals fly, just to feel your touch.
        If I were to stare at your eyes for forever, I would tell people I saw the entire galaxy without even looking at the sky.
        If you're the moon, then I am the tide, for I flow under your command, forever longing for you, as you are my purpose
        My darkest days are shifted with a slight gaze of your fascinating looks. Your beautiful dark eyes are the last fiber holding my shattered heart.
        For if every star in the sky went out I would never know for she outshined them anyways
        If you were a grain of sand I’d search every beach and dessert looking for you and your beautifulness no matter how long I will have to look
        If I was blinded the moment I lay eyes on you, I would not grieve, for in the instance, I truly gazed upon perfection.
        You are the sun to my sunflower, i will always be glancing at your gorgeous light as i follow you around amidst the bright morning.
        My dear, every time your eyes cry like the sea, I will be the sand that waits for you on the shore to dry your tears.
        My dear, when you smile the earth shakes, the universe stops, the heavens collapse, and my heart bursts
        You are like the sun, even though you are miles away you still hurt my eyes
        They say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, but with the way you sway me with your warm embrace, even the blind can picture your elegance.
        You have no shadow, for nothing in this world is able to replicate the beauty you posses.
        You have stolen everything from me, the beat in my heart, the breath in my lungs, the thought in my brain, yet I only wish for you to steal more
        I had a night conversation with the moon, he told me about the sun, and I told him about you
        God must’ve put extra attention on you, for you shine amongst the angels and the devils beg for your forgiveness so that can feel your love
        They say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, but the way you sway me with your warm embrace even the blind could picture your grace.
        For if your flame should ever dwindle I will set this world ablaze to feel your warmth yet again
        If you were an ocean I'd be the salt so you couldn't be anything without me
        When you speak, you speak to me with words, when I look at you, I look at you with feelings
        If she carried Medusa’s curse I would still gaze into her eyes for I will be turned to stone and look at her beauty for eternity
        1 fish 2 fish red fish blue fish
        Thou are the majestic wip to my holy nay nay
        did u fart cuz u blew me away

        Tucker Carlson leaves Fox

          DADDY TUCKER IS FINALLY 🙌 GONE 🏃🏃 !!!! After years of using his 🙋 position 🏿🏿 as a 💰👌 PUSSY 🙅 PIMP to make 🖕 all 🕔 the 🖖🖼 bitches 🙋🍑 in the 💚 news do whatever he wants, 💋😩 Daddy 🤖🙈 Tucker finally 👌😲 decided 🤔👯 it’s 😩👂 time to 👐 move 🏃☝ on. 👌🏻 He 👉❓ is 🤔 now 😞 moving to 🔧 New York where 🤔 he will continue 🔁🔁 bringing you 😘 the 👏😨 news 💼 with 👏👏 his ✋ new show, “Tucker Carlson Tonight: The New York Edition” 👌👌 on 🔛 FOX 🐺 NEWS 🗣🎥 SIX From now 😢😤 on, 💔 Tucker is 🤔🔥 officially 🏻 off 😡 the 🏞 leash and is doing 😛 whatever he wants in ♂ your 💼⛵ never ending quest 🗺 to 💦🔭 find out 🌐🏍 what daddy thinks about everything 🏻 . Send 📱📧 this to 10 NEWSPUBESCENDENTS so 🔥💯 that you are always 🤔 aware 👌 of what Daddy thinks 👏

          Minecraft is easy

            punch a tree make a wooden pickaxe mine stone make stone tools and a furnace mine some iron from surface caves make iron tools, armor, a bucket, and a shield build a house mine for diamonds make full diamond armor, a pickaxe, a sword, and an enchantment table find a village build a villager breeder build a trading hall build an iron farm enchant all gear explore the nether find a nether fortress kill blazes find a warped forest kill endermen find the stronghold kill the ender dragon explore the end find loot and elytra make a creeper farm for gunpowder mine for netherite kill wither skeletons fight the wither find a woodland mansion defeat the mansion and get totems of undying conquer an ocean monument build an epic base die to a baby zombie and rage quit for 2 years

            Discord kitten rizz

              Hey, are you there? Haha.. I know this may sound cheesy, but.. I just really love you. I love everything about you. Whenever I see you online.. I can't help but smile. Seeing you is enough to make me flustered. Seriously, how could such an angelic person such as you be my friend? I really don't deserve you. You're so perfect.. my discord kitten. I'm in love with you. You're the light of my life. Without you, I would've never been this happy. Can we talk more? I enjoy your company. Can we call more? I like listening to your voice. Can we just be with each other for a little longer? I love you so much. I'm sorry if I don't reply, discord daddy needs to do his discord mod work. But don't worry, kitten. I will reply to you ASAP. Haha.. let me get to the point. Can we be... more than friends? Can you be... more than.. just my discord kitten? I want you to be my girlfriend. If not, that's fine.. not like it matters.. haha. I respect whatever you say. But I just really want you to be my girlfriend. I can be your boyfriend.. we can get online married in the future. I'll spoil you with money from my paycheck. I'm deeply in love with you.. FUCK. I love you so much. I can't bear to part from you. I just want to hug you forever. I love your smile, your voice, your personality, your laughter, your everything. I understand if you don't want to be my girlfriend.. after all.. you are more than what I am. I'm just saying.. I can give you yearly discord nitro if you want to be my girlfriend. Honestly, at this point... what I feel is more than love. I can't explain it.. but it is deeper than the word "love." Let's just talk for a little longer. When you go offline.. I immediately miss you. I don't want to be with anyone else but you. I want us to have matching My Dress-Up Darling icons. I want to be closer to you. My darling, my kitten, the love of my life.. please be my girlfriend. I will do anything for you to be my girlfriend.. I can be your boyfriend. Fuck, I love you so much....