I'm so fucking horny for art hoes. I want to fuck a coked-out tumblr hipster DIY aesthetic astrology thot in her lip gloss DSL mouth. I want to cum all over a girl with thick frame glasses and edge dyed bobcat bangs. Everytime I hear a THICK, waist-high-jean-clad braindead choker-wearing slutty wiccan minx say "yikes", "y'all", "big mood", "cancelled" or "this is a bop", I get an uncontrollable urge to run up to her and fondle her d cups and sweaty fat thighs. I want to pour ropes onto her contoured cheeks and neotenous faces and rhinoplatisized nose. I want to finger an art hoe through her jean overalls while pretending to be interested as she talks about van gogh and arctic monkeys and how david foster wallace fans suck and gilles deleuze and VICE news and 'union pool' in williamsburg and steven universe and homeopathy and saveur magazine and taking adderallto pass exams. IM SO. Fucking. Horny
As the title says, my father walked in on me whilst I was jerkin the cherkin, "What is thee doing with thy genitalia!?" He screamed as he opened the door into my private chambers. I tried to lie and claim it was not what it looked like, but alas, it twas. My father immediately ran out of my room and into the courtyard of our palace, "Father! Father!" I yelled out in vein as my papa kicked his horse led carriage into action, veering out of our palace grounds. What shall I do? Will I ever see him again?
💯It’s national LimerDICK🍆💦😮 day☀️😹 When SLUTS👅🙌 celebrate the birthday🎂🎉😘 Of big 🍌😫 DADDY👨🏻🤭 Lear🥵🥵🥵 It CUMS💦😛😂 once a year📆💥 😏So swallow 👅🤤some CUMMIES🤭 today💅🏻
LimerLICK👅💦 some good pussy😼 tonight🌌 😛And deepthroat😮💨😵 every cock🐓🥒😝 that’s in sight🫣 🙏🏻Not all poems📝 are🗼DEEP 🌊😉 Or will put you to 💤sleep 😴 🛏️ 😵When you #️⃣POUND 🔨 that ass🥰🥰 in the moonlight🌝💫
Before you spread🖐️ those 🤩Sexy Cheeks🍑😍🥵 👌🏻Send this to 🔟 HOetry freaks💋👀😂 If you dont🤡 it’s bad luck🛑😰 And it’s going to SUCK🤪🤮 😅’Cause you’ll get 🚫🙅🏻♀️RIDER’S block🙅🏻♀️🚫 for 🔟 weeks🪦😫🤣
I worked at a movie theatre selling snacks right? One day someone ordered a hot dog and asked for mayonnaise, but when I went to make the hot dog I realised something, we ran out of mayo. I tried telling him that I was going to go to the grocery store right across the hall (because the theatre was in a mall). He said he was in a rush because the 'Nigga Ballsack: Shaking of Thugs' Premiere Episode was going to play in 15 minutes and they would stop letting people in within 5 minutes before the show began, so I had to think quickly. But then a voice in my head told me to watch thug shaker porn. It was the perfect idea! I turned on my computer and went to r/thugsaucesthesequel. I rubbed my hard, throbbing, moist cock so hard that cum spurred out of my cock onto the hot dogs. I gave it to the customer and he payed, he then went to watch the show. Literally 15 minutes later he came back and asked me, "WHAT IS THIS??? I ASKED FOR MAYONNAISE." I said "So you want mayonaise? You rushed me, what could I do?" Little did I know, my hard, moist penis was still sticking out. But all of a sudden, I uncontrollably squirted all my cum all over him. "YOU ARE DISGUSTING" he yelled. But i squirted cum all over his mouth and he couldn't breath or speak. I let him struggle for a while, but because I sprayed cum in his nose, he couldn't breath, and he eventually stopped moving and died. Turns out, another employee saw the scene and called the cops. When the cops arrived, I also sprayed my cum on the cops. I blinded them with my cum. They started firing their guns all over the place and shot everyone in the movie thearater. I then saw police cars arrive, but it didn't matter. I shot cum all over the streets, and the cars crashed into each other. Eventually they sent the SWAT team and they arrested me, not before i killed 2 other swat officers with my cum. I was apprehended because I ran dry, I have to serve 36 years in jail, fuck the feds.
So the other day, me and my homie were out and about, just vibin' and chattin', when I suddenly got hit with a stroke of genius. I was like, "Bro, I dare you to moan like a loli in these public bathrooms for 20 dollars." (NO HOMO)
Now, my friend was like, "Bruh, what kinda wild shit are you on? You think I'm a bitch, huh? Ain't nobody tryna hear me hollerin' like an anime girl in here." But I was like, "Nah, you ain't a bitch but you're close enough."
So we head into the bathrooms, and I start spinnin' this elaborate tale about "hentai basics"
My friend was skeptical at first, but I kept ratcheting up the tension and adding all these extra details about how lolis were known as sluts for saying uwu and those kinds of shit...
Next thing you know, my boy is sweating bullets, eyes wide as saucers, and I can tell he's about to lose it.
I hit him with the classic, "what's wrong, are you scared? You ain't gotta do it if you don't want to," but he wasn't backing down.
He takes a deep breath, looks himself dead in the mirror of the boys' bathroom and lets out the most ear-piercing, high pitched moans you could ever imagine.
People start banging on the doors, laughing while others are shouting... security's called, chaos is everywhere.
And me? I'm just standing outside the bathroom door, laughing my ass off and filming the whole thing for my cringe collection.
My friend comes stumbling out a few minutes later, looking like he just survived a near-death experience, and I'm like, "Bro, you just made my day. That shit was hilarious, take your 20 dollars."
Needless to say, we got the fuck outta there real quick before anyone could figure out what the heck was going on.
But man, I'll never forget the look on my friend's face when he let out those loli moans. It's such a classic.
I am currently crying so hard right now. This is seriously the most beautiful, well put together story ever. I can’t believe how magical it was 1:12. That part truly made me shed a tear. And especially at 6:34 that part was just so truly heart touching words can not describe the series of emotions I felt. I absolutely loved the climax it had insanely excellent detail. Oh and we can’t forget the conclusion. The conclusion was the greatest and saddest conclusion I have ever seen better than any of the books I have read. Thank you so much for creating this absolute masterpiece. This is essentially the most important masterpiece of film history. It is a tragedy that this, it can’t be called a film, but a transcendent emotional experience, will be inaccessible for most. It beautifully encapsulates the human struggle to its basics; suffering, pleasure, faith, despair. It connects with the characters within the viewers, individuals suppressed within our own subconscious. It stays vibrant, fresh, and revolutionizes the art of storytelling and filmmaking while making a damn of statement on what it means to be human. Entertaining, gripping, and simply exhilarating. This might be the most impactful piece of art I’ve come across in my life, and I’m definitely coming back to it in the near future to study it more deeply. this is an absolute masterpiece , I was brought to tears listening to this and seeing the bacon go whirly swirly in a circle countless times. it absolutely moved my soul , and I don't think I can ever be the same. this bacon has changed my entire mental state , I am now at peace with who I am and what I will be doing later in my life. i have forgiven all my enemies and now I am a man of a pacifist life. I will move on , gotta move on , as the song says. the bacon is so inspirational , it shares it vast wisdom with all of us , and we are all so lucky that it would bestow it's great words with us. we are all children on bacon. hail bacon. hail bacon. The spinning bacon, rotating in one direction with this music... This made me tear up. How could such a bacon do such a thing? I'm struck by awe by this masterpiece. Especially when the bacon spins, showing its lightly salt covered tan skin. I can hear the crunch just from here, and so as the beautiful sound of the bacon scraping the dark, smooth velvet floor. The flavor, music and everything can be heard, tasted, seen and felt from a screen. You can really hear the breaths between the music artist, empathizing her love for this rotating bacon. Truly what I call modern art. This was the most legendary performance by any piece of bacon I have ever watched. The acting was top tier and very life changing. This is one of the greatest work from a piece of bacon I have ever seen especially on 57:42.I am currently crying so hard right now. This is seriously the most beautiful, well put together story ever. I can’t believe how magical it was at 1:12. That part truly made me shed a tear. And especially at 6:34 that part was just so truly heart touching words can not describe the series of emotions I felt. I absolutely loved the climax it had insanely excellent detail. Oh and we can’t forget the conclusion. The conclusion was the greatest and saddest conclusion I have ever seen better than any of the books I have read. Thank you so much for creating this absolute masterpiece. This is essentially the most important masterpiece of film history. It is a tragedy that this, it can’t be called a film, but a transcendent emotional experience, will be inaccessible for most. It beautifully encapsulates the human struggle to its basics; suffering, pleasure, faith, despair. It connects with the characters within the viewers, individuals suppressed within our own subconscious. It stays vibrant, fresh, and revolutionizes the art of storytelling and filmmaking while making a damn of statement on what it means to be human. Entertaining, gripping, and simply exhilarating. This might be the most impactful piece of art I’ve come across in my life, and I’m definitely coming back to it in the near future to study it more deeply. this is an absolute masterpiece , I was brought to tears listening to this and seeing the bacon go whirly swirly in a circle countless times. Tt absolutely moved my soul , and i don't think I can ever be the same. this bacon has changed my entire mental state , I am now at peace with who I am and what I will be doing later in my life. i have forgiven all my enemies and now I am a man of a pacifist life. I will move on , gotta move on , as the song says. the bacon is so inspirational , it shares it vast wisdom with all of us , and we are all so lucky that it would bestow it's great words with us. we are all children on bacon. hail bacon. hail bacon. The spinning bacon, rotating in one direction with this music... This made me tear up. How could such a piece of bacon do such a thing? I'm struck by awe by this masterpiece. Especially when the bacon spins, showing its lightly salt covered tan skin. I can hear the crunch just from here, and so as the beautiful sound of the bacon scraping the dark, smooth velvet floor. The flavor, music and everything can be heard, tasted, seen and felt from a screen. You can really hear the breaths between the music artist, empathizing her love for this rotating bacon. Truly what I call modern art. This was the most legendary performance by any bacon I have ever watched. The acting was top tier and very life changing. This is one of the greatest work from a bacon I have ever seen especially on 17:24. I am currently crying so hard right now. This is seriously the most beautiful, well put together story ever. I can’t believe how magical it was 1:12. That part truly made me shed a tear. And especially at 6:34 that part was just so truly heart touching words can not describe the series of emotions I felt. I absolutely loved the climax it had insanely excellent detail. Oh and we can’t forget the conclusion. The conclusion was the greatest and saddest conclusion I have ever seen better than any of the books I have read. Thank you so much for creating this absolute masterpiece. This is essentially the most important masterpiece of film history. It is a tragedy that this, it can’t be called a film, but a transcendent emotional experience, will be inaccessible for most. It beautifully encapsulates the human struggle to its basics; suffering, pleasure, faith, despair. The work put in to this is incredibly inspiring. The graphics, the animation, the music, so much thought was put into it. This has remined me that you can do anything you put your mind to. Not even mentioning the memories, this makes me feel like an infant again, just laying my eyes on this beautiful masterpiece gives me all the good feelings in life. I also understand what happiness is again from this. Not even to mention the most incredible part that is 2:10. Bacon spinning has changed my life for the better. It connects with the characters within the viewers, individuals suppressed within our own subconscious. It stays vibrant, fresh, and revolutionizes the art of storytelling and filmmaking while making a damn of statement on what it means to be human. Entertaining, gripping, and simply exhilarating. This might be the most impactful piece of art I’ve come across in my life, and I’m definitely coming back to it in the near future to study it more deeply. this is an absolute masterpiece , I was brought to tears listening to this and seeing the bacon go whirly swirly in a circle countless times. it absolutely moved my soul , and I don't think I can ever be the same. this bacon has changed my entire mental state , I am now at peace with who I am and what I will be doing later in my life. So much great graphic design, so much suspense, so much greatness in this one video. i have forgiven all my enemies and now I am a man of a pacifist life. I will move on , gotta move on , as the song says. the bacon is so inspirational , it shares it vast wisdom with all of us , and we are all so lucky that it would bestow it's great words with us. we are all children on bacon. hail bacon. hail bacon. The spinning bacon, rotating in one direction with this music... This made me tear up. How could such a bacon do such a thing? I'm struck by awe by this masterpiece. Especially when the bacon spins, showing its lightly salt covered tan skin. I can hear the crunch just from here, and so as the beautiful sound of the bacon scraping the dark, smooth velvet floor. The flavor, music and everything can be heard, tasted, seen and felt from a screen. You can really hear the breaths between the music artist, empathizing her love for this rotating bacon. Truly what I call modern art. This was the most legendary performance by any bacon I have ever watched. The acting was top tier and very life changing. This is one of the greatest work from a piece of bacon I have ever seen especially on 57:42. I am crying. This has made me go through an emotional rollercoaster. I cried, beat off, and also watched a movie while watching this premiere. This has made me go through so much. I passed depression because of this. It really inspired me to become an outstanding young man. Thank you.
I am literally crying. Tears are streaming down my tiny face, making my face, clothes, and feet wet. So much noise, too. I had no idea I could make this much noise from crying. I literally can’t even. I’ve never not been able to even this hard before. I’m literally can’t evening so hard that my tears are thicker than Santa Claus’ belly fat. All these tears coming from me literally crying and can’t evening are inhaled by my mouth, causing me to drown. I am literally dying. I am literally on the verge of death right at this instant. This is insane. I’ve never felt this way before. I’m not just crying; I’m not just dying—I am literally crying, and I’m literally dying. Blood. I see blood. Blood is pouring down from my very eyes. I literally see blood. I’m laughing so hard right now. I literally can’t even stop laughing—it’s insane. Please save me, Lord. Please save me from this madness. I am crying, and I am in need of assistance. I’ve been literally dying for about 45 minutes now. Is there no end to this? I just want to meet my maker. I want to see the light, and I wish to see the darkness, both at the same time. Save me, Christ, as I am literally dying at this instant. Oh, as I live and breathe, I can barely speak at this point. In fact, I cannot speak at all. I am literally mute. I’m deaf, too, as my tears and blood have inserted themselves into my ears, blocking my hearing. I’m literally crying out of my nostrils. Oh wait, that’s just my body juice. Oh, how I’ve missed this.
