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Dark Souls ruined my life.

    Dark Souls copypasta
    Dark Souls ruined my life. There were some thugs who tried to rob me the other day. I immediately roared and tried to replicate Manus' five hit combo. They laughed and kicked the shit out of me. When I was shopping, I found a cool greatcoat and tried to look its item description. It was a bit heavy, "I wish I had Havel's Ring." I said to myself. I asked the shop assistant how much souls is it. She yelled at me, I didnt understand why for a second. My mom says she is worried about me, I replied her how cool it is to use ultra greatswords. She doesnt get me. I started to roll when I saw a dog in the park, thinking it was Sif. I also feel discomfort about there are not enough blacksmiths in my area to forge my armor. Dark Souls ruined my life. 

    Always remember that everything a niji says is about suspension.

      Nijisanji suspension copypasta
      Always remember that everything a niji says is about suspension. If they are going on vacation, it's a suspension. If she's taking a break, she got suspended. If she seems happy, it means she managed to avoid the stealth suspension this week. If she is sad, it means she's going to get suspended next week. If a Niji is going to the toilet, she's actually going to suck off her manager to avoid getting suspended. If she went on a date with another Niji, they actually got suspended together. If she fails on a puzzle in a game, it's because she got distracted by a message from her manager that she's suspended. Table smash? Not a fist but it's her hitting the table, because she got suspended. Did she oversleep a stream? Micro suspension. If she starts a guerilla stream it's because she's currently suspended, but is rebelling against management.The only possible reason for a niji to take a break is because she's suspended. Whenever a niji talks about her family, she's actually developing a cover story about her suspension. That health break she took for surgery? Suspended. Not only that, but everything is actually a keyword for suspension
      >Thanks for the aka supa = thank you for staving off suspension for the day
      >Im tired this week = I'm going to get suspended this week
      >Im planning a collab = They are planning on suspending me
      >Oh sorry, that was just my family in the background = Oh Manager-san is behind me looking like he's considering suspension
      >Thank you for all the support everyone = thanks management they didn't suspend me today
      It all revolves around suspension. All nijis , every single one, worry about suspension every day, every hour, every moment. Every single narrative, every single noise she lets out is because of fear of suspension. All nijis read these threads and they're here right now. All while having being suspended. They keep having technical difficulties because they keep getting suspended, it fries electronics in their room. Every yab moment is because they can't take their minds off the fear of being suspended long enough to think straight

      i was walking from the store with my groceries when i suddenly bumped into Frank Supercell

        So i was walking from the store with my groceries when i suddenly bumped into Frank Supercell. I said that i recognized him and knew who he is, when suddenly frank grabbed me by my shoulders and asked if i bought this seasonโ€™s brawl pass, i said no. After that he suddenly punched me in the gut, took my groceries and ran away. Is there anything i can do? Should i contact supercell support? 

        Veterans Day

          Happy Veterans Day๐Ÿ—ฝ๐Ÿ’ฏ! It's time To ๐ŸŽˆCELEBRATE ๐ŸŽ‰the troops today so their helmets โ›‘ shouldn't be all that is hard๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ˜‹! Remember ๐Ÿง ๐Ÿค” their sacrifice so that we can be the sexy ๐Ÿ˜œcumqueens ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿ’โ€โ™€๏ธthat we are today. Let freedom ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ ring because it's time ๐Ÿ•™ to let a vet SEMPER FI-nish ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆall over your smooth little belly. Don't forget to serve ๐Ÿ’ชโœ‹๐Ÿผyour CUNTry today! ๐Ÿ’ฏSend this to ๐Ÿ”Ÿ little SLUTS ready to give cervix to America. ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธIf you get 5๏ธโƒฃ back you're promoted to Genital. ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘
          i hope ur standing๐Ÿ•ด๐Ÿ•ด ๐Ÿฅ–๐Ÿฅ–at attention ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณbecause itโ€™s VETERANS DAY๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ’‚๐Ÿ‘ฎ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธโ€”like memorial day but for people who have been veteRAN THROUGH๐Ÿš‚๐Ÿคช๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†, so give a FIVE FINGER SALUTE โœŠโ†”๏ธโœŠ and RESPECT THOSE TROOPS ๐Ÿคค๐Ÿ‘…! remember that some gave all ๐Ÿ˜ขโšฐ๏ธbut ALL GAVE CUM ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿ’ฆin the FIGHT ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช for our right to FUCK everything that is TIGHT๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ† so SUCK๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ daddy's little PANTS SOLDIER to show your SUPPORT๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ or let him COCK๐Ÿ˜ it in your PORT ๐Ÿšขโ›ตsend this to 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ hotties ๐Ÿฅต๐Ÿฅต you want to SEMPER FI-nish all over u ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘.If u get 0๏ธโƒฃ back its BACK TO THE TRENCHES for u! If u get 5๏ธโƒฃ back ur CENTRAL POWERS could use some work๐Ÿฅถ๐Ÿฅถ!!! If u get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ back i'm SHELL SHOCKED ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ’ฃ๐Ÿ’ฅ๐Ÿ’ฃ๐Ÿ˜ฑ ur the BOMB!! ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ”ซ 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐Ÿ’ฆIN UR FOX๐ŸฆŠ๐ŸฆŠ๐ŸฆŠHOLE TONIGHT!!!!
          HEY ๐Ÿ‘‹ ALL YOU ๐Ÿซต DIRTY ๐Ÿ˜PRIVATES ๐Ÿช–๐ŸŽ–๏ธ YOUโ€™VE JUST BEEN SHAFT-ED ๐Ÿ“INTO WORLD ๐ŸŒŽ WHORE ๐Ÿซฆ ONE 1๏ธโƒฃ โ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธERECT โ˜๏ธ YOUR FLAG ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ AND STAND ๐Ÿงโ€โ™‚๏ธ YOUR LITTLE SOLDIER ๐Ÿ’‚โ€โ™€๏ธ TO ATTENTION ๐Ÿซก SERGEANT ๐ŸŽ–๏ธSEMEN ๐Ÿ’ฆAND ADMIRAL ๐Ÿ‘ฎโ€โ™€๏ธ ANAL ๐Ÿ‘ WANT YOU TO STAND FOR THE FAG ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆAND KNEEL ๐ŸงŽโ€โ™‚๏ธTO SUCK DICK ๐Ÿ˜—๐Ÿ†COLONEL ๐ŸŽ–๏ธ CUM ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ WANTS TO HIDE ๐Ÿ™ˆ HIS ARMY MEN ๐Ÿช–๐Ÿ‘ฌIN โฌ‡๏ธ YOUR FOXHOLE ๐Ÿ•ณ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธHOPE ๐Ÿ™ YOU DONโ€™T GET TRENCHDICK ๐Ÿงฅ๐Ÿ† FROM HIS ๐Ÿ’ฆ SOPPING WET ๐Ÿ’ฆ PUSSY ๐Ÿฑ SEND THIS ๐Ÿ‘‡ TO 69 โ™‹๏ธ OF YOUR SLUTTIEST๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿซฆ SOLDIERS ๐Ÿซกโ€ผ๏ธ IF YOU GET 5๏ธโƒฃ BACK ๐Ÿ“ฉ, YOU ARE A VAGINA โœ‚๏ธVETERAN ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿฆฝโ€ผ๏ธ IF YOU GET ๐Ÿ”Ÿ BACK ๐Ÿ“จ, YOUR DICK ๐Ÿ† TOO โœŒ๏ธBOMB ๐Ÿ’ฃ๐Ÿ’ฅโ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธIF YOU GET 6๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ BACK ๐Ÿ’ŒTHE AIR WHORES๐Ÿ’ฅโœˆ๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฅ WILL STRIKE ๐Ÿชง THEIR DICK ๐Ÿ† DRONES ๐Ÿ›ฉ๏ธ ONTO YOUR GI-SPOT ๐Ÿช–๐Ÿ˜ฉ IN THE NAME ๐Ÿ™ OF THIS CUNT-TRY ๐Ÿ˜ฝ๐Ÿ’โ€โ™€๏ธ โ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธIF YOU GET 0 BACK๐Ÿ“ฅ๐Ÿ˜ญ, YOUโ€™VE GOT PTSD ๐Ÿ˜ฐ: PUSSY ๐Ÿˆ TASTE ๐Ÿ‘…STANK ๐ŸคขDISEASE ๐Ÿ˜ท
          You call it a cummy ๐Ÿ˜ I call it fun I can't stop a cadet daddie โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ from poking my buns ๐Ÿ” I'm too squishy no cummies for you โŠ™๏นโŠ™ ๐Ÿ˜ญ just kidding you get one or maybe two ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ Who knows ๐Ÿ˜ˆ maybe three , maybe four, once I feel a cummy I just want more โœ”! I'm Oprah ๐Ÿ˜ on her show, I'm ๐Ÿ…ฑlack and loud โœŠ and I want to make every veteran daddy proud ๓พ“ฆ, thinking of troops and their willies hard as rock , they all make me squishy like their famous soldier cock ๐ŸŒ‹! ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿณ send this to the troops ๐Ÿ’ฃ who made us their princess of squish, get five back you're a real cumqueen bish ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿš six, seven, eight or nine? Well somebody's been having a squishy time ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜œ ten is great but don't stay up late, a cum queen needs rest to regenerate ๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜‘
          fuck veterans lmao
          
          gamers have fought in
          
          -ww1 ๐Ÿ”ซ
          
          -ww2 ๐Ÿ”ซ
          
          -space ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ‘พ
          
          -crusades โœ๏ธโš”๏ธ
          
          -post apocalypse โ˜ข๏ธ๐Ÿ˜ท
          
          -animes ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ’ข
          
          -gamergate (never forget) ๐ŸŽฎ๐Ÿ›ก๏ธ
          
          so dont talk to me about ur injuries from "afganeestan" ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

          GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO

            HELP! GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO trapped us in their GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO prison in ROBLOX!! Thats right! We are trapped in this GEGAGEDI ROBLOX game and have to find a way to escape! We had a blast playing this game and then even revealed some CRAZY GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO secrets! YAAHOOOOOO!!! Aha! You're riding on it! GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO! Oh no its the nugget GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO OH (hahaha) OOH! And we sang the GEGAGEDI song over and over in this video! You don't want to miss it!! Can we escape the GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO prison and transform into the GEGAGEDIGEDAGEDAYO meme in this video?!?! LETS GO!!! 

            E = mc^2 + AI

              From a tweet that shows the type of circlejerk that happens on LinkedIn. The original comment was allegedly from a bot.

              After countless sleepless nights I can finally say I have perfected an equation that has the potential to significantly impact the future:
              
              E = mc^2 + AI
              
              This equation combines Einsteinโ€™s famous equation E=mc^2, which relates energy (E) to mass (m) and the speed of light (c), with the addition of AI (Artificial Intelligence). By including AI in the equation, it symbolizes the increasing role of artificial intelligence in shaping and transforming our future. My equation highlights the potential for AI to unlock new forms of energy, enhance scientific discoveries, and revolutionize various fields such as healthcare, transportation, and technology.
              I can suggest an equation that has the potential to impact the future:
              
              E = mc2 + AI
              
              this equation combines Einstein's famous equation E=mc2, which relates energy (E) to mass (m) and the speed of light (c), with the addition of AI(Artificial Intelligence). By including AI in the equation, it symbolizes the increasing role of artificial intelligence in shaping and transforming our future. This equation highlights the potential for AI to unlock new forms of energy, enhance scientific discoveries, and revolutionize various fields such as healthcare, transportation, and technology.
              What

              NFT version

              Iโ€™ve got a better one:
              
              E = mc2 + NFTs
              
              Its a useless equation, but by including NFTs we can scam dumb crypto bros to make money.