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Here is how Capitalism is comparable to My Wife Leaving Me

    Here is how Capitalism is comparable to My Wife Leaving Me
    
    First of all, my wife is gone (I miss her very much). Similarly in Captalism the “Surplus Value” of the “Workers” is gone (Marx Reference). Additionally we see a very bureaucratic system with middle management jobs that don’t really need to be done in Captliksm, likewise I had to spend my Monday signing “Divorce Paper” instead of going fishing with the guys. Finally, in capitulatistic society every person is atomized (“Osmosis Jones” Reference) and part of a larger ‘spectacle’ as Debord observes . On the other hand my wife made quite a “spectacle” of herself when she screamed at me for two hours about perceived failings in our relationship. (I thought it was fine)
    
    Hopefully we can one day start a “Revolution” to defeat this oppressive system. I have personally arranged an “Anti-Capitalist Fishing Trip” with the guys in which each fish we catch will be equally shared.

    Brawl Stars Willow

      Willow copypasta from Brawl Stars

      Its a parody of the infamous Vaporeon copypasta but changed to Willow from Brawl Stars.

      Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female brawler breeding, Willow is the most compatible Brawler for humans? Not only are they in the thrower group, which is mostly comprised of idiots, Willow is an average of 5’03” tall and 89 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Stats for HP and access to shield gear, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Willow would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the star powers obsession and love is blind, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their Gadgets Dive and Spellbound, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Brawler comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Willow turn white. Willow is literally built for human dick. Ungodly Acid attacks, Gadgets+Star Powers, means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more 

      I own an M1 Abrams for base defense, just as the Founding Fathers intended

        Own an M1 Abrams for home defense

        Its the “Own a musket for home defense” copypasta but changed to tanks.

        I own an M1 Abrams for base defense, just as the Founding Fathers intended!
        
        4 T-90s break into my hangar.
        
        I yell “What the devil?!” As I grab my composite helmet and an M829A1 round.
        
        I blow a golf ball sized hole in the first T-90, they explode on the spot.
        
        I fire HEAT-FS at the second T-90, and it misses because the T-90 dodged and nails the Warrior IFV next door.
        
        I load an experimental APFSDS round and yell “Tally Ho, lads!” It over-penetrates the first T-90 and destroys the other right behind it, the sound and shrapnel sound off base alarms.
        
        I fix the engineering dozer and charge the last terrified T-90, flipping it into a ditch. The tank runs out of gas while waiting for the MPs to arrive because the crew’s shock is impossible to treat.
        
        Just as the Founding Fathers intended.

        Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan

          Joe Rogan is like Khan copypasta

          Its from a 4chan post describing Joe Rogan’s podcast during the height of his popularity. The copypasta is often use as an ironic joke whenever Joe makes a bad take.

          Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan from the steppes that took an interest in intellectual things and his podcast is basically him bringing slightly nervous scholars and magicians to come before him to explain how the world works “glasses man, you explain to Joe why sky big, and how tree grow” but he will also believe almost anything you tell him, and only recently (in the past few years) does he clap back like “Tiny hat man say otherwise, do you lie to Joe? tiny hat man safe fat not bad for you, that sugar is enemy, so which is truth? Joe thinks you are wrong” and people just nervously go “oh-oh ok h-Haha yeah i guess so”
          
          “Joe spend many moons on horseback and training with bow and arrow, but Joe also wonder why skyfire rise from mountains every morning, you will explain this to Joe”
          Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan from the steppes that took an interest in intellectual things and his show is basically him bringing slightly nervous scholars and magicians to come before him to explain how the world works “glasses man, you explain to Joe why sky big, and how tree grow” but he will also believe almost anything you tell him, and only recently (in the past few years) does he clap back like “Tiny hat man say otherwise, do you lie to Joe? Tiny hat man say fat not bad for you, that sugar is enemy, so which is truth? Joe thinks you are wrong” and people just nervously go “oh-oh ok h-Haha yah I guess so” “Joe spend many moons on horseback and training with bow and sword, but joe also wonder why skyfire rise from mountains every morning, you will explain this to Joe.” 

          HELP I-😭 I DECIDED TO WEAR A PENCIL SKIRT IN SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED “WOW HOURGLASS!” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF. (I have a mommy voice) AND THEY ALL HAD NOSEBLEEDS😭

            Its the Pencil Skirt copypasta that started from Tiktok and is often spammed in the comment section as a joke.

            HELP I-😭 I DECIDED TO WEAR A PENCIL SKIRT IN SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED "WOW HOURGLASS!" AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF. (I have a mommy voice) AND THEY ALL HAD NOSEBLEEDS😭
            Off topic but I remember these boys kept spying on me (I was wearing a tight maxi dress) and when I started talking (I have a mommy voice lol) there noses started bleeding and they called me mommy </3 

            Spanish version

            AYUDA- 😭 DECIDÍ PONERME UNA FALDA LÁPIZ EN LA ESCUELA Y LOS NIÑOS GRITARON "WOW RELOJ DE ARENA!" Y ME PRESENTÉ. (Tengo mommy voice) Y A TODOS LE SANGRARON LA NARIZ

            CHRISTIAN VEIL

            HELP I-😭 I DECIDED TO WEAR A CHRISTIAN VEIL IN SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED “WOW CHRISTIAN” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF. (I spread the gospel) AND THEY ALL PRAISED JESUS WITH ME 

            SKIBIDI TOILET

            HELP I- 😭I DECIDED TO WEAR A SKIBIDI TOILET TO SCHOOL AND THE TOILETS YELLED “WOW SKIBIDI!” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF (I HAVE A SKIBIDI VOICE) AND THEY ALL SANG SKIBIDI TOILET WITH ME. 

            “WOW RHOMBUS”

            HELP -I 😭 I WORE A PENCIL SKIRT TO SCHOOL AND THE BOYS YELLED “WOW RHOMBUS” AND I INTRODUCED MYSELF (I sould like a dying otter) AND THEY ALL HAD EARBLEEDS 

            This is Mavuika ❤️‍🔥Pyro Queen 👸 370 Base Atk 🌩

              This is Mavuika ❤️‍🔥Pyro Queen 👸 370 Base Atk 🌩🤺 250% crit damage 🏋‍♂️ extra 40% crit rate from Codex 🎖Best Pyro on fielder 🌶 Best Pyro off fielder 👹 Buff team damage 🕶 buff more with cinder 🥋 No ICD 🤹‍♀️ exploration God 🏍 can retire Xiangling 👩‍🍳 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA