Vea zorra, yo voy a pasar por a su chosa por usted hijueputa, vamos a ir a hecharnos unos tapis, pero Dios guarde llegué el salonero hijueputa y pongas esa cara cuando diga; "que van a tomar los señores dama y caballero" usted lo que va a decir es; "no papi, pidamos lo que usted quiera" Y vamos a pedir birra, económico, Cerveza! No agarrese en esa picha de que; "Hay papi que risco un whisky papi, porque no pedimos Baileys" Déjate de esas pichas MalParida. Y te comes una boquita y dele gracias a Dios y después de ahí nos vamos a desPicharla toda, ir a reventar la pura pinga malParida, escucho bien hijueputa, Dios guarde escupas la leche porque en la vida vuelvo a recogerte zorra hijueputa, Ya sabe!
I know the title sounds deranged, but I swear to god im not a troll. Here’s the context:
My bf and I are long distance, so we used to have plenty of phone sex, however, that’s been happening less and less often as our relationship has gone on (according to him, he just doesn’t feel as horny as often anymore). We’ve met and had relations irl a few times, and he’s always the kind to last very long in bed, and during phone sex as well. I used to be insecure about it, thinking that maybe it was something wrong with me, but hes genuinely a great bf who constantly assures me, and has never once said anything bad about our sex life.
It should be noted that he watches plenty of porn (as do I), and neither of us see that as an issue, so this isnt about him hiding porn from me or something. We were calling today, and I was playing a game on my phone (papa’s cupcakeria, you can’t make this shit up), and after about twenty minutes of us doing our own thing, he suddenly goes “im done” and shows me his cum????? Obviously, I get really confused and ask how the hell he was jerking off this whole time without me realising (we were on video call), before mentioning that I thought he was looking at the stock market (he spends his free time just staring at the stock market for hours on end like a lunatic, but I love him so it’s whatever).
Tell me why this man then looks me in the eyes and goes “yeah, I was looking at the stock market, I was too lazy to look for porn.”
It then hits me that he literally just CAME to the stock market. When I point this out to him, all he said in response was “it’s a man thing, I didn’t wanna bother you while you were playing your game” and told me not to worry about it.
Now, I don’t want to sound insane, but I got a bit upset, because in my head, he could have very easily asked to have phone sex with me, but chose to literally jerk off to the stock market instead. To add insult to injury, he came REALLY quickly (like significantly quicker than he would during anything involving me) which makes me feel like SHIT, because there is no way the goddamn stock market is somehow more stimulating than his own damn girlfriend.
Don’t get me wrong, i’m not super genuinely upset, but you’ve gotta admit this shits gonna hurt your pride if it happened to you. I honest to god have no idea how to even move forward after this, and I just needed to type this out, because no one would believe me otherwise 💀
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Look, I love TPAB. It's my favorite album of all time, and I'd even go as far as saying that it's one of the best albums of all time, period. But as a frail white boy from a gated community in Vermont, I find it hard to relate to the subject matter of issues in the hood and criticisms of the black community.
So I was wondering if there was something like a To Cut a Panini, a TPAB style album that goes over white issues like having depression, doing LSD, and committing white collar crimes like tax fraud. I don't mean this in a racist way or anything, it's just as a white man I don't need to be told that it's gon' alright, because I already know it'll be because I have a trust fund.
Any and all suggestions will be greatly appreciated. Toodles! 😁👍
🇧🇷 ATENÇÃO PATRIOTAS 🇧🇷 EM RESPOSTA AO AUTORITARISMO 📵🤚🏻 DAS REDES SOCIAIS 📵👨💻 NOSSO CAPITÃO 🔰 JAIR MESSIAS BOLSONARO 🔰 CONVIDA TODOS A DELETAREM SEUS PERFIS EM FORMA DE PROTESTO 💥💥 SE TRUMP NAO TEM TWITTER NÓS TAMBEM NAO TEMOS 👊🏻👊🏻 REPASSE E DELETE IMEDIATAMENTE 💚💛
No matter how much of a better player you are in strive, it doesnt matter unfortunately.
I dont care what anybody says or think, i am the best at this game by FAR. No one comes even close
Screw the mirror match and rps and gl to everyone in top 8
Peace