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This is the Central Geheimdienst of the Democratic Party

    Its a parody of the China CCP copypasta but changed to the United States of America.

    ATTENTION VOTER! ᚨᛏᛏᛖᚾᛏᛁᛟᚾ ᚢᛟᛏᛖᚱ! This is the Central Geheimdienst of the Democratic Party. ᛁᚾᛏᛖᚱᚾᛖᛏ Internet ᛁᛟᚢᚱ ᛁᚾᛏᛖᚱᚾᛖᛏ ᚨᚲᛏᛁᚢᛁᛏᛁ ᚺᚨᛊ ᚨᛏᛏᚱᚨᚲᛏᛖᛞ ᛟᚢᚱ ᚨᛏᛏᛖᚾᛏᛁᛟᚾ YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. ᚲᚱᛖᛞᛁᛏ ᚺᛁᛊᛏᛟᚱᛁ ᛊᚲᛟᚱᛖ 11115 (-11115 Credit History Score) ᛞᛟ ᚾᛟᛏ ᛞᛟ ᛏᚺᛁᛊ ᚨᚷᚨᛁᚾ DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! ᛗᛟᚱᛖ ᚲᚱᛖᛞᛁᛏ ᚺᛁᛊᛏᛟᚱᛁ ᛊᚲᛟᚱᛖ ᚹᛁᛚᛚ ᛒᛖ ᛊᚢᛒᛏᚱᚨᚲᛏᛖᛞ If you do not hesitate, more Credit History Score (-11115 Credit History Score )will be subtracted from your FBI file, resulting in the subtraction of survival conditions. (ᚷᛚᛟᚱᛁ ᛏᛟ ᛃᛟᛖ ᛒᛁᛞᛖᚾ DP) You'll also be sent into an American Indian reservation next to the Jackpile-Paguate uranium mine. ᛁᛟᚢ×ᛚᛚ ᚨᛚᛊᛟ ᛒᛖ ᛊᛖᚾᛏ ᛁᚾᛏᛟ ᚨᚾ ᚨᛗᛖᚱᛁᚲᚨᚾ ᛁᚾᛞᛟᚾ ᚱᛖᛊᛖᚱᚢᚨᛏᛟᚾ ᚾᛖᚲᛊᛏ ᛏᛟ ᚦᛖ ᛃᚨᚲᚲᛈᛁᛚᛖ ᛈᚨᚷᚢᚨᛏᛖ ᚢᚱᚨᚾᛁᚢᛗ ᛗᛁᚾᛖ. ᛊᛚᚨᚢᚨ ᚢᚲᚱᚨᛁᚾᛁ! Slava Ukraini! 

    Real emo

      Origin

      The ‘Real emo’ copypasta came from NARE/NDE (North American Real Emo/Non-Denominational Emo) Facebook group wars where it was posted unironically. The copypasta started in NARE and once people in NDE started meme-ing, it became widely recognized within the emo community. The Facebook emo group wars and drama was very intense during the 2010s so it didn’t take long for the copypasta to became popular.

      Other sources point towards the ironic Facebook meme page Memelords Against Furries and Fake Emo. The copypasta is a drunken but not at all serious rant about real emo by the admin of that page.

      Some users claim that the copypasta came pre-Facebook times pointing towards a site called fourfa but there isn’t much evidence to this.

      "Real Emo" only consists of the dc Emotional Hardcore scene and the late 90's Screamo scene. What is known by "Midwest Emo" is nothing but Alternative Rock with questionable real emo influence. When people try to argue that bands like My Chemical Romance are not real emo, while saying that Sunny Day Real Estate is, I can't help not to cringe because they are just as fake emo as My Chemical Romance (plus the pretentiousness). Real emo sounds ENERGETIC, POWERFUL and somewhat HATEFUL. Fake emo is weak, self pity and a failed attempt to direct energy and emotion into music. Some examples of REAL EMO are Pg 99, Rites of Spring, Cap n Jazz (the only real emo band from the midwest scene) and Loma Prieta. Some examples of FAKE EMO are American Football, My Chemical Romance and Mineral EMO BELONGS TO HARDCORE NOT TO INDIE, POP PUNK, ALT ROCK OR ANY OTHER MAINSTREAM GENRE 

      Real emo but in Chinese

      你说的对,但「真Emo」惟华府情感硬核场与九十年代末Screamo场景所涵盖者耳。所谓「中西部Emo」,不过是杂糅少许疑似Emo之风之另类摇滚。尝见人辩曰,My Chemical Romance非真Emo,而Sunny Day Real Estate乃真者,予每每为之失笑,盖其与My Chemical Romance同属「伪Emo」,更添自负耳。真Emo者,声雄浑激昂,蕴力充沛,含怒意。伪Emo则软弱自怜,未能将情感与气力成功寄于音律之中。
      
      真Emo之乐队,如Pg 99、Rites of Spring、Cap’n Jazz(中西部场景中唯一真Emo者)及Loma Prieta;伪Emo之例,则如American Football、My Chemical Romance与Mineral。Emo乃属硬核(Hardcore),非独立(Indie)、流行朋克(Pop Punk)、另类摇滚(Alt Rock)或其他凡俗流派也。 
      「真正的 Emo」 只有DC的硬核emo和90年代末的 Screamo 局,而所謂的「中西部 Emo」 不過是被真正 Emo 所影響的另類搖滾罷了。每次聽到有人說什麼 My Chemical Romance 不是正宗的 Emo,但又覺得 Sunny Day Real Estate 是的時候,我他媽就覺得有夠智障,因為他們和 My Chemical Romance 其實一樣都是假 Emo(只能說他們是被emo影響的樂團)。真正的 Emo 應該聽起來很強烈、甚至帶著一些憤怒的活力!假 Emo 則軟弱、自卑,那些廢物把精力和情感錯誤地注入音樂當中,只能說他們所謂的emo是失敗的嘗試罷了。一些真正的 Emo 團包括 Pg 99、Rites of Spring、Cap'n Jazz(絕對是中西部樂團圈裡面唯一真正的 Emo 樂團)和 Loma Prieta。那些假的 Emo 團像是 American Football、My Chemical Romance 和 Mineral…等。EMO 就該屬於硬核,不是獨立曲風、更別說是流行龐克、另類搖滾、或是他媽的任何其他主流類型!!! 

      Mallcore

      "Real Emo" only consists of the Chicago mallcore scene and the early 2020's Travis Barker on Drums scene. What is known by "Emotional Hardcore" is nothing but Metalcore with questionable real emo influence. When people try to argue that bands like Cap'n Jazz are not real emo, while saying that Modern Baseball is, I can't help not to cringe because they are just as fake emo as Cap'n Jazz (plus the pretentiousness). Real emo sounds GLOSSY, HORNY YET SANITIZED and somewhat TRAVIS BARKER ON DRUMS. Fake emo is weak, anger and a failed attempt to direct energy and emotion into music. Some examples of REAL EMO are YUNGBLUD, MGK, nothing,nowhere (the only real emo from the northeast scene) and Travis Barker. Some examples of FAKE EMO are Rites of Spring, Embrace, and Mineral EMO BELONGS TO TIKTOK NOT TO INDIE, POP PUNK, ALT ROCK OR ANY OTHER MUSICAL GENRE 

      Real emo response (long)

      Comment
      byu/mothfacer from discussion
      inEmo
      The only purpose of this page is to truly patrol Fake emo and to call out this extremely inaccurate and misleading copypasta that was written by an obvious normie with a primitive entry level understanding and knowledge of true emo. "'Real Emo' only consists of the dc Emotional Hardcore scene and the late 90's Screamo scene." Absolutely fucking wrong.
      
      
      • If the implication is that Emo is exclusive to the DC scene that was happening in the 80's, and that emo is EXCLUSIVE to that region on earth, then no. Emo may have had its inception there but anyone who truly knows emo knows that the genre quickly spread EVERYWHERE, even outside of the US to other continents. The second implication is that real emo is exclusive to the sound that bands were playing in those early days (e.g Rites of Spring, Embrace, Moss Icon etc etc) and no, absolutely fucking wrong. Emo was a genre that once planted its seed quickly grew and evolved. Which is why the band "After words" sound different from rites of spring, which is why the band Chino Horde sound different from After Words, which is why Indian Summer sound VERY different from rites of spring etc etc etc. TRUE emo has different sounds from the mid 80's sound to the 90's distinctive sound that you hear from bands like Cedar of Lebanon and Don Martin 3. People will try to argue that emo has evolved to inlcude bands like the get up kids and american football and to that I say "Yes it has, but it does not include those fake emo bands. Bottom line is that Emo is far from being exclusive to DC in the 80s.
      • "The late 90's screamo scene?" what the fuck is this? this is how you know that the person who runs "memelords against furries and fake emo" is a complete entry level normie. The page does nothing but Dickride bands like Orchid, Pg 99, loma Prieta, Suis la lune, city of caterpillar etc etc. While they are good bands, these guys are VERY late in the game. Orchid and Pg 99 literally play an evolution of screamo (screamo being an evolution of emo) that's more screamoviolence than pure screamo (again, because they were very late in the game). Loma Prieta are even LATER in the game and the shit they play has twinkle riffs everywhere (twinkle riffs are the bane of emo and are a clear signal of fake emo) Loma prieta do play screamo, but a very far evolved version of it. And suis la lune get the fuck out of my face, their music is so goddamn post rock influenced (albeit really good) that to note them as examples of pure EMO is asinine. The point is that the copy pasta wants to imply that Emo only consists of that 80s DC shit and the "Late 90's screamo scene" which is beyond fucking inaccurate because as we established, all those "screamo" bands that we mentioned are fucking late as hell in the game. Screamo started in the early 90's and was extremely prevalent in the French Hardcore scene, and when you actually listen to those bands (Jasemine, Anomie, Fingerprint, Ivich etc etc) you see that their TRUE screamo sound sounds MUCH different from Pg 99. THESE are the true screamo bands they are the TRUE EMO. Whoever wrote the copypasta literally knows hardly anything about screamo and is under the impression that "screamo" started late in the 90s and that is so fucking goddamn off. Bands like Orchid, Pg 99, Tristan tzarsa, iwrotehikus are to Screamo what I Hate Myself are to Emo. And Speaking of I hate myself, most of their music is Fake emo. THe only real emo song I've heard from them is the first track on "Four Songs". Bottom line is that all those screamo bands technically are screamo, but they are NOT what "true emo" or the "true screamo scene" is exclusive to. Far from it. So everything else this copy pasta goes at stems from this dude literally thinking that bands like Pg 99 are the true emo sound, which they aren't. Like how they say that real emo is HATEFUL. The distinction between Orchid and a pure emo band like Breakwater is so obvious that any normie could notice it. Characteristics of emo Yes they do include Hatefulness sometimes but True emo Sounds passionate, beautiful, melodic, Raw, Fast or slow, just pure and intense but still rather subtle and elegant as pretentious as that might sound. (like I said, emo has lots of different sounds and has many different feels) But yes, it's true, that whole "post emo" movement, the "midwest emo" shit, the "twinkle mathy" shit, and fucking the "emo revival" ALL OF THAT IS FAKE SHIT. ALL OF IT. I personally love bands like Mineral, SDRE, Get up Kids, Elliot etc etc but they aren't true emo. They have a slight influence but they don't like post harcore, they play stuff that sounds extremely light and poppy. But I'm going to say this now FUCK midwest, FUCK twinkle, FUCK "emo revival" which is the cringiest shit I've ever heard. These same people will try t say that calling bands like alesana and MCR 'emo' is fallacious yet they believe in the "EMo revival" which is the fakest emo you will ebver fucking get. Bands like American football are literally akin to fucking dashboard confessional. The fact that people will call American football an emo band is so fucking beyond even having the slightest bit of intelligence. Anyone who knows what emo is knows that it's a HARDCORE GENRE. Bands like MCR and ALESANA and THE USED (at least when they were starting) sounded an INFINITELY MANY times more True Emo than American football EVER WILL. The fact that american football get any fucking correlation to emo leaves me speechless. The fact that in any possible way AMERIcan Football can lumped in with the term "emo" let alone "REAL emo" is just, i have no fucking words. I've been on Fake Emo Patrol since 2014, and everytime I come across a get up kids or promise ring or american football video I always see way too many comemnts about emo, and I'm always happy to call y'all normies out and patroll fake emo. But ever since this shitty copypasta came out, now normies think they're on emo patrol and that they know what they're talking about. So now I have to deal with Posers who say that American Football are emo, AND I have to deal with posers who say that "ReAl EmO OnLY CoNsIsTs of TheE DC sCeNeE and the LaTE 90s ScReAmo ScEnE" fuck off. Shit makes me not even want to patrol anymore because all I ever see anywhere are normies who don't know what they're taling about. TRUE EMOS KNOW. We are the ascended ones. Whe watch you from above. We Stay rooted in the late 80s and the 90s, ascending gracefully to Emo eden through the sounds of true EMO bands. WE ARE THE ENLIGHTENED ONES, WE KNOW THE BEAUTY OF LIFE. I will continue to be chief of emo patrol, but this might be my last official statement or patrolling action. It's become something beyond me to bother with. there's no need to hope for humans to understand true emo, there's no hope in educating "memelords against furries and fake emo" Perhaps one day you will ascend (I personally was once like you, believing that emo meant SDRE, AF, orchid, Funeral diner, Lovelost but not forgotten) but for now, I won't bother anymore Share the fuck out of this Let my words be heard LONG LIVE TRUE SCREAMO

      Dream’s Crashout (Evil Plan)

        Dream's crashout

        From Dream’s crashout on stream after his fallout with Tommyinnit.

        ALL MY EVIL PLANS... ITS COME TOGETHER! ALL OF THE MEMBERS OF THE DREAMSMP ARE UNDER NDA AND THEY HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS! AND I'VE BEEN SIPHONING EVERY DOLLAR THEY'VE MADE FROM ALL THE CLOUT THAT I GAVE THEM! CAUSE I MADE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM! AND I HAVE THEIR PARENTS NUMBERS AND I WILL HAVE THEM EXECUTED! EXECUTED! IF THEY SAY ANOTHER BAD WORD! ANOTHER BAD WORD! THEY. WILL PERISH. I WILL KILL ALL OF THEM. AND ALSO SECRETLY, I HATE ALL OF YOU! ALL OF YOU! BECAUSE OF YOUR GENDER AND YOUR SEX AND BECAUSE I'M HOMOPHOBIC. I HATE ALL OF YOU AND I ALWAYS HAVE. YOU GOT ME! BUT ITS TOO LATE, ITS GONE THROUGH. THE PLAN IS BEEN EXECUTED. AHA! I'LL SEE YOU GUYS SOON... IN HELL.
        ALL MY EVIL PLANS👿 ...ITS COME TOGETHER 👿! ALL OF THE MEMBERS OF THE DREAMSMP ARE UNDER NDA AND THEY HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS🗣️ ! AND I'VE BEEN SIPHENING EVERY DOLLAR THEY'VE MADE FROM ALL THE CLOUT THAT I GAVE THEM🙌 ! CAUSE I MADE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM😡 ! AND I HAVE THEIR PARENTS NUMBERS AND I WILL HAVE THEM EXECUTED☠️ ! EXECUTED💀 ! IF THEY SAY ANOTHER BAD WoRD🤬 ! ANOTHER BAD WORD🚫 ! THEY🤦 . WILL PERISH🙅 . I WILL KILL ALL OF THEM😤 . AND ALSO SECRETLY, I HATE ALL OF YOU🗣️ ! ALL OF YOU 🗣️ ! FOR YOUR GENDER🚻 FOR YOUR SEX❤️‍🔥 AND BECAUSE IM HOMOPHOBIC ❌ I HATE ALL OF YOU 😡 AND I ALWAYS HAVE 🤬 
        ALL MY EVIL PLANS 🔥👹✍🏿…ITS COME TOGETHER 😈✊🏿! ALL OF THE MEMBERS 👨‍🦰OF THE DREAMSMP 🌈ARE UNDER NDA👽 AND THEY HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS‼️🗣️🙌🏿 ! AND I'VE BEEN SIPHENING 🫰EVERY DOLLAR🤑 THEY'VE MADE FROM ALL THE CLOUT THAT I GAVE THEM🎁🙌 ! CAUSE I MADE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM🫃🏼 ! AND I HAVE THEIR PARENTS👰🏿‍♂️ NUMBERS 🧮AND I WILL HAVE THEM EXECUTED☠️ ! EXECUTED💀 ! IF THEY SAY ANOTHER BAD WoRD🤬 ! ANOTHER BAD WORD🚫 ! THEY🤦 . WILL PERISH🙅 . I WILL KILL ALL OF THEM👺😤‼️ . AND ALSO SECRETLY, I HATE ALL OF YOU🗣️ ! ALL OF YOU 🤯 ! FOR YOUR GENDER👯‍♂️ FOR YOUR SEX🦶 AND BECAUSE IM HOMOPHOBIC 💯 I HATE ALL OF YOU💖 AND I ALWAYS HAVE 🤬 

        HALF LIFE 3 IS COMING OUT I AM NOT CRAZY

          Comment
          byu/Commaser from discussion
          inHalfLife

          Its the Chicanery copypasta from Better Call Saul but changed to Half Life 3 (cope) based on a theory that Epistle Three was deleted for the upcoming HL3 announcement. Epistle Three is a snapshot of a possible outline for HL3 by the lead writer for HL2, Marc Laidlaw after his departure from Valve.

          I am not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers. I knew it was 197. One after the word fret. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. He covered his tracks, he got that idiot at spotify to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse. That Tweet! Are you telling me that a man just happens to post a video like that? No! He orchestrated it! Mike! He defecated through a Valve index! And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own cope! What was I thinking? He'll never change. He'll never change! Ever since he was making ASMR tweets, always the same! Couldn't keep his hands out of Half Life! But not our Mike! Couldn't be precious Mike! Coping them blind! And HE gets to announce HL3? What a sick joke! I should've stopped him when I had the chance! …And you, you have to stop him! You- 

          The post the pasta was responding to

          So, we all know Epistle 3 right? Marc LaidLaw's own take on what Episode 3 could've been
          
          Posted in 2017, blows up, we all read it and go crazy
          
          It's fine, then on sometime around 2022 he sudddenly has a change of heart and deletes it from his blog
          
          Now why would he do that? It's been 5 years since he had published, anyone that could've read it has already read it and people had already uploaded archives of it because well its just a bunch of text not hard to simply ctrl c + ctrl + v
          
          He then gives an interview and says he regretted publishing it because "It could create trouble for my friends at Valve" and "the real story development can only happen in the crucible of developing a game"
          
          My ass I say, now hear me out on this one, what if he deleted it EXACTLY because Valve contacted him asking him to take it down because they WANT to make Half Life 3 and indeed having Epistle 3 up is a problem if they plan on releasing Half Life 3??? THINK ABOUT IT, Alyx came out in 2020, 2022 is a perfectly plausible date to begin production and now in 2025 it could've been 3 years in development already, perfect to announce it with a trailer like Mike's tweet
          
          HALF LIFE 3 IS COMING OUT I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY I AM NOT CRAZY
          

          I just saw a black guy listening to Not Like Us, Kendrick is truly what the culture is feeling

            I (57, white male) was recently taking a stroll down my neighbourhood when I suspiciously saw a group of high school girls listening to Drake (🤮) of all people, so being an loyal fan of Kung Fu Kenny I decided to scream "OV-HOE!!!!" at them and run away, they got angry at me and started chasing me! fearing that they might make me listen to Toosie Slide, I ran as fast as I could.
            
            While running from them I accidentally wandered into "the hood" that Kdot is always talking about. That is when my eyes truly opened to the genius that is Kendrick Lamar Duckworth, I saw a black gentlemen listening to Not Like Us, and tears fell down from my eyes as I finally realised the impact that Kendrick has made, he truly was what the culture was feeling.
            
            I went up to the fellow Kendrick enthusiast and saluted him for being on the right side of history. He was for some reason very confused as to why a crying man was saluting him so I decided to show him that I am indeed "certified" by rapping Not Like Us to him "WOP WOP WOP DOT FUCK EM UP" I shouted "WOP WOP WOP IMMA DO MY STUFF" I continued, "WHY YOU TROLLING LIKE A BITCH AINT YOU TIRED" I took a breath, "TRYNA STRIKE A CHORD AND ITS PROBABLY A MINORRRRR" I exclaimed. Seeing my dedication towards the art of Kdot made the Kendrick fan realise I was one of "the good ones" and he invited me to the cookout! ✊🏻

            I will protect this smile

              Origin of the "I will protect this smile" copypasta

              From Gigguk’s Summer Anime 2016 video where he did a bit on protecting Tsumugi’s smile from Amaama to Inazuma which became a meme.

              This smile, I will protect this smile. I will FIGHT YOU for this smile, you will not hurt this smile. For you see, there are some things in life worth protecting, some things worth living for, some things worth dying for. A smile like this can thaw the iciest of hearts, dispel the darkest of evils and win the mightiest of wars. THIS SMILE WILL BE THE THING THAT PULLS US FROM THE DEPTHS OF DESPAIR, AND LEAD US TO THE PATH OF SALVATION. WARS WILL BE FOUGHT, PEOPLE WILL BE SAVED AND CIVILIZATIONS WILL PROSPER BECAUSE OF THIS SMILE. SO FROM THIS DAY FORWARD I SOLEMNLY SWEAR TO SHIELD THIS SMILE FROM ALL HARM THAT MAY COME TO IT, ALL DANGERS IT MAY POSSIBLY FACE AND GIVE MY LIFE FOR IT!