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Ajaw

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    Happy New Year & New Years Eve

      2025 New Year & New Year’s Eve

      IT’S 👈 ALMOST 💯🕸 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣ SO 💒💯 IT’S TIME ⏲⏰ TO 🚻🆒 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣-DIVE 💦🙀 INTO 👉➡ SOME 🤷 PUSSY🥟🗜️ 💦 AND DROWN🌊 IN 🍑 SOME ⏳ DICKS🍆‼️ 😣 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ WAS 👈✨ A 🍂⏰ 🤤DELECTABLE 😋😋 YEAR ⌚️FOR 😻ALL US WHORES‼️ WHO CAN 💦 FORGET ❌❌ THE 👏 SUMMER☀️ 😂 WE 👦🤠 ALL 😋 CHOKED 😩🍽️ON 🌭BRATS🌭, OR ➕💰 THE GOLD 🏅🏅 WINNINGS 🌉EIFFEL TOWERS 🇫🇷AT 😩 THE 👏 PARIS 📸OLYM(SEND)PICS 🎥⁉️ AND 💯💯 REMEMBER🗣️ TO 👌STROKE ✊👋 ONE ❤ OUT FOR 🎁 OLD 👴 JIMMY CARTER, WHO’S 😂 THROWING 🚮😤 IT BACK 😂🔙 ON 🔛🔋 THE BIG 💦NUT🥜 FARM 🐓IN THE 👊 SKY 🏕🏖 🌠👅. SEND 📨 TO 5️⃣ OTHER WHORES 💃🕺OR YOU’LL NEVER ❌‼ HAVE 👏🈶 A PRESIDENTIAL SIZED 🪩ERECTION 🍆 EVER 😠🌚AGAIN‼️ SENT ✉ TO 🔟 AND 😤👏 YOU’LL 👈👆 BE KISSED 👄 EVERYWHERE 😎 WHEN ⏰🍑 THE 🍗COCK🍆 STRIKES 🕰️MIDNIGHT. 🕯 SEND 📬📩 TO 💦 1️⃣5️⃣ ⚪ AND 👏👏 THIS WILL 🖕 BE 😱🐝 YOUR SLUTTIEST 🍆🍑 YEAR 🤔 YET‼️ 
      🎆🎇F🅰️PPY NEW REAR🍑 my 🧨🎇FESTIVE 🥳🎊FUCKSLUTS🎉‼️‼️ 💃💃CUNT💗gradulations😘 4️⃣ surviving😇 1️⃣ more cycle 🍒🩸🩸😬around 🍑🏀the SUN 🌞🕶️☀️‼️‼️ Twenty-twenty-fWHORE2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ was LONG and 🫣HARD🥴, let’s reCUNT🔢 what happened… a 😳scandalous😱 TWINK💁‍♂️🏳️‍🌈✨ recorded😩🤳 his WILD🥵🍆🥵SEXcapades 📲from DEEP🥶 within the ⛺️confines of the 🇺🇸UNITED SLATES 🏛️SENATE❕ … Momma Sun🥵☀️ spread👐🏽 her legs🦵🦵 WIDE📭 open, revealing👀 her 🕳️🌑HOLE-lar 💥e-CLITS🕳️🌑 to 🌎North AmeriCUM❗️… a 🇫🇷French 👨🏻ZADDY 💈POLEvaulter was 🚫DICKsqualified🙊🙊 in the Summer Ol-LIMP-DICKS💍🌶️ when his 🫨GIANT 🥩MEAT POLE🕹️ got in the way❕… and 🧠🌀DEEPTHROAT😵‍💫 DONNIE🤠, after getting his ASS🍑💥BLASTED🤯 on the 🍼CUMpaign trail, 🫡🤤SUCKED OFF😮‍💨 a microphone🎤🤤 (this is 🙅‍♂️NOT👏 A 👏JOKE🙅‍♀️) and got🏁 a presidential🗳️ ERECTION🍡😈‼️‼️ BUTT🍑 TITS🍒 all CUM🍌 to an end🔚🎬, so let’s 💃👯‍♀️TWERK🕺🏻 into Twenty-CUNTY-five2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣ with a 🅱️IG 💥BANG❗️ When that 🍆😳COCK🍌😩 STROKES🕰 🌃MIDNIGHT🕛, 🎱🔮BALLS🏐 are gonna 🙇‍♂️DROP🧎‍♂️, 🥂🍾 CHAMPUSSY’S🤭💎 gonna 🤯🧨POP💥, and we’re gonna 🌬🌬BLOW🍆💦🤤 some FAT 🧠😮‍💨HORNS📯😈. You may do dry🚫🥃🍸🍹 JANUARY🥶 but make 🫵🏻your NEW 🆕 Year’s reSLUTlution🫦🫦 to keep that 🍑BUSSY 🍩WET‼️ 💌Send💋📫 this to 2️⃣5️⃣ of your 🤪ROWDIEST🤪 naughtiest😫💦 📣📣NOISE MAKERS🎉🎉. If you get 0️⃣🔙, you 🚫won’t👮‍♂️ be getting 😱ANY 🎉PARTY poppers 🎉 POPPED 💥 inside🍌🕳 🫵🏻you this 🎊🎊🍆🍆 GOO YEAR’S DAY📆🍆🎊🎊. If 🫵🏻you get 5️⃣🔙, the 🎆fireworks🎇 🙅‍♂️WON’T❌❌ be the ONLY thing ♋️EXPLODING👀👀 tonight‼️‼️ If 🫵🏻you get 🔟➕🔙, get ready for the 🌊WETTEST🥺🥺, 😵‍💫RAUNCHIEST, CUM-FILLED💦👅🫃, BBL-🅱️🅾️🅾️STED💅🏻😏 NEW YEAR💯‼️‼️ 
      💥🎆 F🅰️PPY 🥳 NEW 🥳 REAR 🍑 🎇🎊🎉 u SLORE‼️👯😘🍾 Yes ✅ you heard 🦻🏻 me right, it’s time ⏰ to book ✍🏻 that BBL 💃🏻 and get that ass 🍑 🅱️ 🅱️ 🅱️lown the fuck up 🕺🏽 and 🅱️lown the fuck out 💦 It’s officially 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣and you know what that means 🤔🤔 DICKcember 🍆⛄️❄️🎅 is OVER‼️ Twenty-CUNTY-Five 2️⃣🅾️2️⃣5️⃣ 🗓🎉💥 has 💦⬇️ C U M 🎉🎊⬇️😁 and its time ⏰ 2 commit 👊 some Auld Lang SIN‼️ 🎼😈👹😜🤑 Get out the Party P🅾️ppers ❣️😼🎉 cuz at the stroke 🍆✊😩 of twelve o’C🅾️CK 🌚🕰 Balls ⚪️⚫️✨ r gonna DROP ⬇️🤸‍♂️😏 chamPUSSY 🍾🍑 is gonna POP 💥🔥😫 and CUMfetti 🍆🎊🎉 is gonna RAIN 💦💦 all over u!!! 💦🤤😋🎉🎊 If u send this 💌 to 2️⃣5️⃣ beloved New Year Hoes 🥰👯😉 and tell them 🤠💬😳 u love them 🥰❤️🧑‍🤝‍🧑 Daddy New Year 👨🏻😻😘👨‍👦will give u his special Fireworks Show 😳😜🍆💥🎇🎆😁😋😁😋😁😋 But if u DONT…. 😰 Ur gonna get a Happy New YEAST INFECTION 🤢🍄🍑🤮👎 luv uuuu 💓💓 
      💥🎆 F🅰️PPY NEW YEAR🎇🎊🎉 you beautiful SLUTS‼️👯😘 2024 was Long and Hard 🍆✊😔 We Laughed 😂💯🔥 We Cried 🥲😢😭 We re-ERECTED Daddy TRUMP 😫🗳️🤡🏛️ We SHOT a CEO 🚶🔫🚓 and ASS-tended DIDDY'S party 🧴💦😫 Butt DICKcember 🍆⛄️❄️🎅 is OVER‼️ ❌ Twenty-twenty-Five 2️⃣🅾️2️⃣5️⃣ 🗓🎉💥 has finally 💦⬇️ C U M 🎉🎊⬇️😁 and its time ⏰ 2 commit 👊 some Auld Lang SIN‼️ 🎼😈👹😜🤑 Get out the Party P🅾️ppers ❣️😼🎉 cuz at the stroke 🍆✊😩 of TWELVE o’C🅾️CK 🌚🕰 Balls ⚪️⚫️✨ r gonna DROP ⬇️🤸‍♂️😏 chamPUSSY 🍾🍑 is gonna POP 💥🔥😫 and CUMfetti 🍆🎊🎉 is gonna RAIN 💦💦 all over u!!! 💦🤤😋🎉🎊 Send this 💌 to 2️⃣5️⃣ beloved New Year Hoes 🥰👯😉 and tell them 🤠💬😳 u love them 🥰❤️🧑‍🤝‍🧑 so Daddy New Year 👨🏻😻😘👨‍👦will give u his special Fireworks Show 😳😜🍆💥🎇🎆 all year round 😁😁😁😋😋😋
      ⏰🕰️⏰TikTok On the clock⏱️⌚️⏱️ time to GOBBLE ON SOME MOTHER FUCKING SOME COCK😳😲😜😝🤪🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦. Get your HOEvid-19 💉💉booster because it’s New year SAME GAPING CUM HOLE‼️‼️💦💦💦🕳️🕳️🕳️🕳️. 2️⃣0️⃣-2️⃣0️⃣-WHORE is now 2️⃣0️⃣-CUNTY-5️⃣. PUUURRRRRrrraaatt (🐀) tat-tat 💅🏼💅🏼💅🏼💁‍♀️💁‍♀️💁‍♀️ said the BUSSY 🕳️🕳️🕳️. What are ur res-HOLE-lutions??? 🤔🤔🧐🧐💭 Out this year 📋 are TINY DICKS(😕), 1️⃣-minute men 🤦‍♂️💁‍♂️🤦‍♂️, and a capitalist🤑💰💸💵💶💴 healthcare 🏥system that prioritizes profitability 📈over the health of the American people😷🤕🤒🇺🇸. In this year are 🤔🤔🤔…BIG JUICY COCKS (plural)!!!! 🙀🙀🤯🤯🤗😜🥳🤩🤩 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🥵🥵🥵🥵🍆🍆🍆😩😩😩🍆🍆🍆🍆THAT’S A LOT OF COCK! Will 2️⃣0️⃣-CUNTY-5️⃣ be the year 🗓️ Luigi MANgioni 💪💪💪 is CUMvicted? 💦💦💦💦💦DENY! DEFEND! DEFYYYYYYIIINNNGG GRAAAAAVITYYYY, so let’s all get DICKED 🍆🍆🍆DOOOOOWWWWNNNNNNN 🧙‍♀️🧙🧙‍♀️🧙🧙🏼‍♀️ 😘😘😘🧞‍♂️🧞Wishing u the best POPPERS 🎉🎊🍾 filled new QUEERS🌈🏳️‍🌈🦄. Send this to 5️⃣ of your favorite 😩😩💦💦CUMMIE ☭☭☭🇷🇺🇷🇺🇷🇺 COMMIE 💦💦💦🕳️⛳️CUMDUMPS or no one will CUM (sad) to your 🗓️ new year ⛽️⛽️⛽️PUMP AND 🗑️🗑️🗑️DUMP. Get 1️⃣0️⃣ back and Luigi will CRAM 😫😩🥵😰😍😍😍that SINGLE PAYER PUSSY 💅🏼💅🏼💅🏼 with conjugal visits until UR his LITTLEMISSCUMDUMP 💦💦🍆🍆💦💦🍆🍆😩😩⛳️. And remember, in 2️⃣0️⃣-CUNTY-5️⃣ a California landlord cannot charge more than one month’s rent for security deposits, whether the unit is furnished or not (some exceptions, google it). AND MORE CUM!!!! 🤪🤣🤭😛😛🍆🍆💦💦💦😫😫 
      HAPPY 🎉🎩 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣ 😂 YOU 👆 TWENTY 🌈🌈 TWENTY 🎊 WIVES‼️A NEW YEAR🗓️ 🏌💁 MEANS 👉🤔 NEW 🐓🍆COCKS 🍌TO 🌂GLUCK 🍗🐔NEW 🎀 PUSSIES 🌺TO 🔢💦 SUCK 💦 AND 👏 NEW TITTIES 🍒💥TO FUCK‼️‼️‼️ 🙌 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ 😷💕 HAD 📈UPS⬆️AND 📉DOWNS ⬇️BUT IT’S 🙄😳 TIME 🕟 TO CELEBRATE 🙆 🎊AND 👏💮 GO ✔ DOWN 👇 ON 🚶 SOME 🔇🍭 DROPPING 🪩BALLS 💦💦 TONIGHT 😫😫 AS 🌕THE 🚀COCK 🐓 STRIKES 👏👏 TWELVE🕛‼️‼️ COMMENORATE 🍾 THE 💉🏅 NEW 👌👆 YEAR🤗 BY 😈 KISSING 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩😗😘 YOUR 👏 FRIENDS 😏👫 ON 👌 ALLLL 💯THEIR 💢💋LIPS 👄 🌮TO 😩 START 🏁🍆 YOUR 🚢 👯‍♀️SLUTTING 💃OFF 👯‍♂️RIGHT🫦‼️‼️‼️ 👉✔ JUST 👏🤫DON’T 🙈GET🙈 PREGNANT🤐WITH A 👦 BABY 👶 NEW 👌 YEAR 😣 OF 🚋 YOUR 👉👉 OWN‼️‼️ ☯ SEND 💌THIS ⬇😬 TO 📮YOUR 🔝1️⃣0️⃣ 🕛💸 TWENTY 🎊🎊 TWENTY 🍾WIVES🕺 TO PROVE🫶YOU’RE 😍👀 A 📢 TRUE ✌️NEW 🆕 YEAR 😻NYMPHO‼️‼️ GET 5️⃣ ☠ BACK ❌🔙 AND 🍆 YOUR 👀👈 OVARIES 💄WILL EXPLODE 💥🔥 LIKE THE ➡👏 TITAN 🛳️SUB ⚓️💩👨 LAST 🔚⬅ JUNE‼️ GET 🔟☝ BACK 👊AND 💰 YOU’RE 👇🔥EVEN🌩 HOTTER 🔥THAN JULY’S 🎇 🧠☀️RECORD 🤑 BREAKING 👣TEMPERATURES🥵‼️‼️ ❄ 1️⃣5️⃣ 🔙❔ BACK 😤 FOR 🌹🚦 A CHANCE 🧞‍♂️TO 💰 FUCK THE TWINK🧜‍♂️ FROM THE 🌊SENATE 💯 HEARING ROOM 🔊🚹 THIS PAST ⛄️☃️DECEMBER‼️ GETTING 0️⃣ BACK 🙄⬅ MEANS 😼 YOU’LL 🅱️ 🐝💪 DRYER 🏜️THAN 🤢 HENRY🤮 KISSINGER’S 💩ROTTING🧛🤒DICK 🌭IN🍆 HELL‼️‼️ HOPE YOUR ASS 🍑TAKES 🔥ALL 💯OF 💦🔴 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣ 🕑 LIKE A 👌 GOOD 😫👍 LITTLE 👯WHORE🕺🕺💃 AND IT 👀LEAVES 🍃🍃 YOU 💦SOAKED 💧🚿AND 🍆👏 🙏BEGGING🧎‍♂️FOR 👊🖍 MORE‼️ 😩🤯💣🔛🔝🔜
      3..2…1….. 👅🎉🎊NEW YEAR NEW DICK!!👅🎉🎊Happy New Year you 😈FESTIVE FUCKSLUTS! 😈Get ready to POP THAT PUSSY 😩👄after the CHAMPAGNE! 🍾🍾🍾🥂🥂🥂CONFETTI🎊 ISNT THE ONLY THING RAINING DOWN TONIGHT! 😏💦💦Get ready for BUCKETS OF CUM,💦💦💦lots OF BIG DADDY DICKS, 🍆🍆and JUICY COOCHIES. 😩👅The only place you’ll be sitting tonight is on THIS FAT DICK! 😈😈Send this to 10 of your Naughty New Year bitches 👩🏻‍🎤👩🏼or 2025 will be dry and dickless 🙈🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪
      DICKCEMBER 🍆🍆❄️❄️ is nearly OVER 😢😢…. but the NEW YEAR 🎉💥 has almost 💦💦CUM💦💦 and you know 😍 what that means 😏😏.. its time for 😏😏😏👅 NEW 🍆COCKS🍆 for TWENTY HORNY-FIVE😍👉👌 all of the 🍑THOTS🍑🍑😋🙋 are making it their 🎉NEW YEARS🎉 RESOLUTION to find 👅BIG DICKS👅 to EXPLODE 💥💥💥💥 some💥💥FIREWORKS💦💦 .. and some 🎊BALLS🎊 to drop 😉😉 in their ASS 🍑🍑 💥💥 be prepared to get 🍆🍑FUCKED😩😩 at MIDNIGHT 😆🌜🌙 on NEW COCKS 🍆EVE when 🍑🍑ASSUARY 1🍑💦💦 cums💦💦 around🍆🍆👅 SHARE THIS WITH 🎉6⃣9⃣ NEW YEAR HOES😉 BEFORE 😩🍑 2⃣💦0⃣💦2️⃣💦5️⃣or you won’t be getting any 🎉party poppers 🎉 popped 💥 inside u this 🎊🎊🍆🍆NEW DICKS DAY🍆🍆🎊🎊
      👯hey SlutS! 👯💅 Now that we got our yearly 🎁 FUCK 👊🏼from good ole Saint DICK 🎅🏾 it’s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!🗓🍾👅 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ was a LONGG 🍆🍆 and HARD 😉✊🏻😫 year.... we laughed😂😆👌🏼 We cried 😢😖👎 We voted🗳️👨‍💼🏛️ we fucked GOOD👍🏻 dick🍆 and 😵😵BAD 😔 dick, 😫 BUTT 🍑 now let’s 👏👏Celebrate 🙌🎉 and watch that 💦🍆BIG 👅 BALL 😎👌🏼 Drop 👄👄 on us! 💃💃 So spread 👐🏽 those 👐🏽 legs 👐🏽 and count down ⬇️ from 🔟 until your man 💪🏾 pops 🎉 his CORK 🍾🍾 into that thirsty 👅thirsty 👅 hole! 🥰🥰 Send this to 2️⃣1️⃣ COCK-BEGGING ✊🏻🍆 WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED 🍑😱 for the next 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ days 😍😍😍
      2024 😩💯💦was a year 🌎of sex 🍆💦😩drugs 🚬💉🔫smoking wheat 🚬✌️and poppin xannies💥💊 in the school📚✂️ bathroom 🚽🛁but sadly 😕😟2024 💯is coming to 😦🤔and end 🔚🔜🤭and 2025 is right around💦 the corner💀 but don’t worry 😌because🎉🎊 2025 🎉🎊is gonna be a new 🎀💯💦year new 💪💪👅👀me i am gonna reclaim 🚫🍆my virginity , detox from drugs, ❌🚬not smoke mary wanna, ❌😩💦stop poppin pillies❌💊💊 and get Myself a job 📈📊and life 📘📓... 😂😂😂😂😂SIKE 😂😂😂😂😂i pranked yo dumb ass! 😂😂😂😂😂💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💦💦💦💦💦2025 😈is gonna be the year👓🕶🎩 of getting STD👨‍⚕️, smoking acid, 😝😛💯💦fucking everyone i see, 👉👌😼and hopping like a rabbit 🐰🐰💦from dick🍆 to 🍆dick . 🍆If you got pranked ❌😂😂u have to copy paste 📋✏️this and send it to 🎊🎊10 bitches who made 2024 right 🖇😝❤️💦nd made ur pussy loose😈😈💦💯❌💕
      🎉🎆🎉🎆🎉🎆🎉 new year nEw Year 🎉 thats 🎆 a new 🎉🎉 year right 🎉🎉 there 🎉🎉🎉 right🎆there 🎆🎆if I do say ƽo myself 🎊 I say so 🎊 thats the new year im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) hmMMMMᎷМ🎆 🎉🎉 🎉HO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ🎉 🎉🎉🎉🎊 🎉 🎆🎆🎆 🎉🎉Happy New Year🎆
      In 46 BC (bigus 😳 cockus 🍆) Daddy Julius Caesar 🫅 reformed the Roman 🏛️calendar 📅 into the basis of the modern calendar we know today 🙇. So be sure to take time to fuck 🙈🕴️a guy 🧏‍♂️ named Brutus, or you’ll get fucked 🥴😏 23 times like Caesar got stabbed 🔪. In 1582, 🧑‍🎓pope daddy Gregory the 8th 🫦👀updated the calendar to account for leap years 💯 📆, so be sure to LEAP 💃🏃‍♂️on at least 8 fat cocks 👍💕, or stuff your holy hole 8 times 🕳️ 🤪, to thank the Catholic Church ⛪️. Today we celebrate 🎉 🤠🕺 the new year 🎇 by watching 👀the ball ⚽️ drop⬇️ and springing 🤸 into the new year!🎇! So be sure 👍 🙇‍♂️ to drop 👇your 🫵 balls 🎳low, and fuck 🍆🍩 your favorite new years nymph ✨ 🧚 2025 times! Send this to 10 😳🥰 new years nudies 🤭🫣 or your 2025 will be cursed 🫢🔴🃏. If you get 5️⃣ back 🔊 you’re a new years 🫵 noob 👼, if you get 🔟back you’ll be creamy 🍦 when you get your ceasar salad 🥗 tossed 🚹🤦‍♀️and if you get 20 back, maybe Anderson cooper 💁‍♂️ will let you drop 🧎your balls ⏺️⏺️ or pop that pussy 🍾🐱on his new year pole 💈!
      ❗️❗️❗️ATTENTION 2012 KIDS❗️❗️❗️!!! This 👇 is the last year of being a kid 😔👦👧! Because NEXT 👉YEAR! We gon be T33N4G3RS💁🙅💅!! PARTYING 🎉💃 DRINKING 🍻🍸🍹🍷 MAKING OUT AND SEX 👅💦😳 PERIODS 😩🍫 HEARTBREAKS 💔😪 MIDDLE SCHOOL SOPHOMORES (7TH GRADE)

      2024 New Year & others

      HAPPY 🎉🎩 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ 😂 YOU 👆 TWENTY 🌈🌈 TWENTY 🎊 WHORES‼️A NEW YEAR🗓️ 🏌💁 MEANS 👉🤔 NEW 🐓🍆COCKS 🍌TO 🌂GLUCK 🍗🐔NEW 🎀 PUSSIES 🌺TO 🔢💦 SUCK 💦 AND 👏 NEW TITTIES 🍒💥TO FUCK‼️‼️‼️ 🙌 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣3️⃣ 😷💕 HAD 📈UPS⬆️AND 📉DOWNS ⬇️BUT IT’S 🙄😳 TIME 🕟 TO CELEBRATE 🙆 🎊AND 👏💮 GO ✔ DOWN 👇 ON 🚶 SOME 🔇🍭 DROPPING 🪩BALLS 💦💦 TONIGHT 😫😫 AS 🌕THE 🚀COCK 🐓 STRIKES 👏👏 TWELVE🕛‼️‼️ COMMENORATE 🍾 THE 💉🏅 NEW 👌👆 YEAR🤗 BY 😈 KISSING 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩😗😘 YOUR 👏 FRIENDS 😏👫 ON 👌 ALLLL 💯THEIR 💢💋LIPS 👄 🌮TO 😩 START 🏁🍆 YOUR 🚢 👯‍♀️SLUTTING 💃OFF 👯‍♂️RIGHT🫦‼️‼️‼️ 👉✔ JUST 👏🤫DON’T 🙈GET🙈 PREGNANT🤐WITH A 👦 BABY 👶 NEW 👌 YEAR 😣 OF 🚋 YOUR 👉👉 OWN‼️‼️ ☯ SEND 💌THIS ⬇😬 TO 📮YOUR 🔝1️⃣0️⃣ 🕛💸 TWENTY 🎊🎊 TWENTY 🍾WHORES🕺 TO PROVE🫶YOU’RE 😍👀 A 📢 TRUE ✌️NEW 🆕 YEAR 😻NYMPHO‼️‼️ GET 5️⃣ ☠ BACK ❌🔙 AND 🍆 YOUR 👀👈 OVARIES 💄WILL EXPLODE 💥🔥 LIKE THE ➡👏 TITAN 🛳️SUB ⚓️💩👨 LAST 🔚⬅ JUNE‼️ GET 🔟☝ BACK 👊AND 💰 YOU’RE 👇🔥EVEN🌩 HOTTER 🔥THAN JULY’S 🎇 🧠☀️RECORD 🤑 BREAKING 👣TEMPERATURES🥵‼️‼️ ❄ 1️⃣5️⃣ 🔙❔ BACK 😤 FOR 🌹🚦 A CHANCE 🧞‍♂️TO 💰 FUCK THE TWINK🧜‍♂️ FROM THE 🌊SENATE 💯 HEARING ROOM 🔊🚹 THIS PAST ⛄️☃️DECEMBER‼️ GETTING 0️⃣ BACK 🙄⬅ MEANS 😼 YOU’LL 🅱️ 🐝💪 DRYER 🏜️THAN 🤢 HENRY🤮 KISSINGER’S 💩ROTTING🧛🤒DICK 🌭IN🍆 HELL‼️‼️ HOPE YOUR ASS 🍑TAKES 🔥ALL 💯OF 💦🔴 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ 🕑 LIKE A 👌 GOOD 😫👍 LITTLE 👯WHORE🕺🕺💃 AND IT 👀LEAVES 🍃🍃 YOU 💦SOAKED 💧🚿AND 🍆👏 🙏BEGGING🧎‍♂️FOR 👊🖍 MORE‼️ 😩🤯💣🔛🔝🔜
      HAPPY 🎆 NEW YEARS 🎇 YOU SEXY FIRECRACKERS 🧨 WELCOME TO TWENTY 2️⃣0️⃣TWENTY WHORE 2️⃣4️⃣ BETTER CHASE THAT CHAMPAGNE SHOT 🥂 WITH A CUM SHOT 💦 FIREWORKS 💥 ARE GOING TO EXPLODE 🎆 LIKE THIS DICK 🍆IN YOUR PUSSY 🍑🤪 AT MIDNIGHT YOU GET A KISS 😘 AND YOU GET 💖TO SUCK SOME DICK 🤪 NEW YEAR 🎀 NEW TITTIES 🍒 WRAP IT 👍BEFORE 🫡YOU TAP IT 👍 THIS YEAR ‼️‼️WE EATING 🍴GOOD ‼️‼️FUCK A NEW SLUT💯 EVERY DAY TO KEEP THE DOCTOR AWAY ❌👨‍⚕️ ❌ SEND 👏THIS 👏TO 👏ALL 👏YOUR 👏HOES 👏IF YOU GET ONE ☝️1️⃣BACK YOULL GET 🌽SLOPPY TOPPY 🍌 IN A DIVE BAR 🎱 BATHROOM 🚽 THIS YEAR IF YOU GET THREE 3️⃣ BACK YOUR ✨ SUGAR ✨DADDY 👨‍🦳WILL GIFT U WITH 🤑$100 💸AND A BABY 🤰 IF YOU GET FIVE 5️⃣ BACK YOURE 🤞GUARANTEED ‼️TO HAVE AN ORGY👯‍♂️👯👯‍♀️ IN YOUR 🫵PARENTS BEDROOM 👫😩IF YOU GET TEN 🔟 BACK 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣WILL BE THE YEAR 💊YOU BECOME A 🙏🧎‍♂️SEX GOD 💒WITH THE OPPORTUNITY 🎇JESUS DICK ✝️🍆
      💥🎆 F🅰️PPY NEW YEAR🎇🎊🎉 you twenty-twenty-WH0RE‼️👯😈😘 2023 was Long and Hard 🍆✊😏 Lets reCUNT what happened 🤔💭
      * The eCOCKnomy 🤑🍆 💸 got really INFLATED (kinky)… 😳🎈📈😼
      * Elongated Muskrat 👨🏻💰🤡 bought Titter 🐥📲 and renamed it XXX 😳🤤👀
      * a SUBmersble ⬇️🙇‍♂️ tried to see the TITanic 👀🤤🍈🍈🚢 and EXPLODED 😩💥💦
      * Boobie 👱🏻‍♀️💅💖 and Oppenhymen 💣🤯🍑 DOMINATED 😈⛓️ the box office 🎟️🎥
      * Taylick Swallow 🎤🙋🏼‍♀️ had the Eroticas Tour 🏟️😱 and released 1969 (Taylick’s Vag!na) 🤯😍😫
      * Donald Trump 🤢👴🏻 got inDICKted 🚨👮‍♂️🍆 for messing with ✊😈 the ERECTION…. 🍆⬆️🤤
      But now DICKcember 🍆⛄️❄️🎅 is OVER‼️ its time ⏰ 2 commit 👊 some Auld Lang SIN‼️ 🎼😈👹😜🤑 Get out the Party P🅾️ppers ❣️😼🎉 cuz at the stroke 🍆✊😩 of twelve o’C🅾️CK: 🌚🕰 BALLS ⚪️⚫️✨ are gonna DROP ⬇️🤸‍♂️😏 chamPUSSY 🍾🍑 is gonna POP 💥🔥😫 and CUMfetti 🍆🎊🎉 is gonna RAIN 💦💦🤤😋🎉🎊 If u send this 💌 to 2️⃣4️⃣ beloved New Year Hoes 🥰👯😉 Daddy New Year 👨🏻😻😘👨‍👦will give u his special Fireworks Show 😳😜🍆💥🎇🎆😁😋😁😋😁😋 But if u DONT…. 😰 Ur gonna get a Happy New YEAST INFECTION 🤢🍄🍑🤮👎
      DICKCEMBER 🍆🍆❄️❄️ is nearly OVER 😢😢…. but the NEW YEAR 🎉💥 has almost 💦💦CUM💦💦 and you know 😍 what that means 😏😏.. its time for 😏😏😏👅 NEW 🍆COCKS🍆 for TWENTY HORNY-FOUR😍👉👌 all of the 🍑THOTS🍑🍑😋🙋 are making it their 🎉NEW YEARS🎉 RESOLUTION to find 👅BIG DICKS👅 to EXPLODE 💥💥💥💥 some💥💥FIREWORKS💦💦 .. and some 🎊BALLS🎊 to drop 😉😉 in their ASS 🍑🍑 💥💥 be prepared to get 🍆🍑FUCKED😩😩 at MIDNIGHT 😆🌜🌙 on NEW COCKS 🍆EVE when 🍑🍑ASSUARY 1🍑💦💦 cums💦💦 around🍆🍆👅 SHARE THIS WITH 🎉6⃣9⃣ NEW YEAR HOES😉 BEFORE 😩🍑 2⃣💦0⃣💦2️⃣💦4️⃣or you won’t be getting any 🎉party poppers 🎉 popped 💥 inside u this 🎊🎊🍆🍆NEW DICKS DAY🍆🍆🎊🎊
      HAPPY 🥳2024 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣YOU 🫵🏽TWENTY-TWENTY-WHORES! 👅👅🫦I HOPE 🤞🏻🤭YOUR 😫NEW 🤩YEARS🌎🌍🌏 RE-SLUT-LUTIONS 🙏🏽ARE FULL 🗣️OF CUMTASTIC 🥛💦💦💦ADVENTURES! 🤾🏾‍♀️⛹🏼‍♀️🏄🏻MAY YOUR 🫵🏿AULD 👵🏽🧓🏾👴🏼A-CUM-TANCE 😩😩😫💦💦💦BE FROTTED 🍆🍆AND SLOBBERED 🤤👅👅👅FOR THE NEXT⏰ THREE HUNDRED SEXTY FINE 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ DAYS ‼️ GARGLE🙀 THOSE TIMES ⏰SQUARE ⬛️BALLS 🔮🔮IN THAT BEAUTIFUL 😻 SILKY 🍦 THROAT 🗣️OF YOURS 🫵🏽AS WE COCK-RING 🍆⭕️IN THE NEW YEAR 🎆🎇🎆🎇 ‼️❗️❕BUST 💢OPEN 📲THAT PUSSY 😺😸😹😻😼😽WITH A SQUIRT 💦💦💦OF CONFETTI 🎉🎊🎉🎊🎉🎊🎉 ‼️ IF ONE 1️⃣ PERSON🧍🏼‍♀️SENDS 📥THIS BACK ➡️TO YOU, 🫵🏾SAY GOODBYE 👋🏽👋🏿TO THAT TWENTY TWENTY 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆PEE-NIS 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣3️⃣ AND HELLO 👋🏻👋🏽TO TWENTY TWENTY WHORE! 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ IF FIVE 5️⃣PEOPLE 👩‍👧‍👧SEND 📤📨📥THIS BACK TO YOU, YOU 🫵🏼CAN POP 💥💥💥SOME CHAM-PAIN 🍾🍾🍾🍾AND GET SPANKED 🍑🍑🍑🍑BY RYAN SEACREST! 🤤🤤🤤IF TEN 1️⃣0️⃣PEOPLE 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦SEND 📥💌📧📩📤📥✉️THIS BACK TO YOU🫵🏻, YOU’RE THE ULTIMATE 🙀CERTIFIED 🎖️🎖️🎖️NEW YEARS 🎇🎆🧨🎇🎆🧨🎇🧨🎆COCKSLE-EVE! 🎉🥳🎊🥳🎉🎊🎊🎊🥳🎉🥳🎊🎊🎊🥳🥳🎉🎉 
      🗣 HEY all my money 💰 hungry SLUTS 😩 we are bag 💼 chasing 🏃‍♀️ in 2024!!! So stop grinding on that DICK 🍆 and start grinding for that DOUGH 🍞🤑 We know you work HARD😩😰for that ca$h 💵 so make that ca$h 💵 work HARDER for you 🫡😈 deposit that LOAD 💦 of money💰 into a brokerage account 🏦 and watch it grow 🍌😳 contribution limits to Roth IRAs are $6.5k in 2024 🤯🤑 take it all at one if you can handle it 😤🥵 or put a little in each month 🤏 🗓 either way you’re still growing that bread 🥖 with comPOUNDING 💦 interest 💰💸 make your DADDY proud 🥰 by putting your money 💵 where your mouth 👄 is 😩😮 send this to 2️⃣0️⃣ of your sluttiest 🤫🤩 money👅😋 hungry hoes 😻 get 0️⃣ back and you’re just another Bernie Madoff 🫣 BROKIE 😣🙅🏻‍♀️🙅🏼 get 5️⃣ back and you’ll be HOWLING 🐺 all night long like the wolf of Wall Street 😫😌 get 1️⃣5️⃣ 🙀 back and you’ll be having a Warren BUFFET of all the COCK 🍆 and CASH 💰 you want in 2024 😝😍
      3..2…1….. 👅🎉🎊NEW YEAR NEW DICK!!👅🎉🎊Happy New Year you 😈FESTIVE FUCKSLUTS! 😈Get ready to POP THAT PUSSY 😩👄after the CHAMPAGNE! 🍾🍾🍾🥂🥂🥂CONFETTI🎊 ISNT THE ONLY THING RAINING DOWN TONIGHT! 😏💦💦Get ready for BUCKETS OF CUM,💦💦💦lots OF BIG DADDY DICKS, 🍆🍆and JUICY COOCHIES. 😩👅The only place you’ll be sitting tonight is on THIS FAT DICK! 😈😈Send this to 10 of your Naughty New Year bitches 👩🏻‍🎤👩🏼or 2024 will be dry and dickless 🙈🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪
      hEY SLUT👅🙋🏼 now that ChristmASS🎁🎉🎉🙅🏼 is over its time🕐🕥🕢 for 🆕NUDE years eve👍🏼👍🏼😻 its time to hop off Santa’s BIG DICK🎅🏿🎅🏼💦🍆 and suck🍭 that BALL🏐⚽🏀🏈⚾🎾😝till it DROPS⬇ and don't🙅🏼 forget to pop👆🏼 that PUSSY like a BALLOON🎈🔪 with some NUDE year fireCOCKS💥😩 send📲 this to 1⃣5⃣15 of your nude years sluts💦👅 if you get 1⃣0⃣10 back then you’re the baddest💋 ball sucking biTCH and in 2⃣0⃣2⃣4️⃣2024 you’ll get surprises😱 in your PANTS👖😏 if you get 5 back then the nude year will bring➡ you lots of cock soup😩🍆🍜 if you get 0⃣0⃣0⃣0⃣0 back😷 then no🚫🙅🏼 nude years cummies for you😭😱😖😫
      Its NEW YEARS‼️‼️‼️🎆🎆🎆🎆 that means its time to SHOOT 👏 them 👏 LOADS 👏 (of fireworks) UP into that DARK BLACK HOLE 🕳️🕳️‼️🍑🍑 you better POP that CHAMPAGNE🥂 and get ready to get FRISKY 😳🫣 at 12:00 AM‼️🕛 get ready for those GOLDEN BALLS tonight🏀⚽️ because CUMMIES ARE CUMMING‼️‼️‼️‼️🎆🎆🎆 send this to 5️⃣ of your best CHAMPANGE BOTTLE DEEPTHROATERS 🥂🥂🍾🍾 if you get 5️⃣ back your gonna get SMOOCHED 💋😘this new years if you get 🔟 back your gonna be 🥵 HOT 🥵 HOT 🥵 HOT and not from the fireworks 💥 😉‼️ if you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back you are the BEST 🏆🥇 at taking that CHAMPAGNE BOTTLE 🍾 IN ⬅️ and OUT ➡️ all JANUARY FIRST‼️🗓️ HAPPY 😃 NEW YEAR HOES 👯‍♀️ I HOPE YOU GET LOTS OF NEW YEAR 🎉🎉 CUMMIES‼️‼️
      Hello you filthy slut! 😉😋😉 hope you had a greedy Xmas stuffing yourself whenever you could 😈😈😈 now 2024 is cumming fast towards us 💦💦💧💦 are you entering the new year face on or from behind 🍑🍑🍑🍑 Make your resolutions this year as HARD as possible 🙀🙀🍆🍆 aim for bigger larger and thicker things that will stretch your capabilities 🤪🤪😩😩😍😍 but before that wel-cum the new year!! Let’s make this night last as lonnggg 🤞🤞🙌👉👌as possible don’t let the decade FINISH too quickly ⏳⏳🍆💦💦 be sure to fill up your gl-ASS to its maximum 🥛🙇‍♀🙇‍♀🙇‍♀🙇‍♀ and keep your lips wet all night👅👅👄👄. Gotta be sure to see out this year with a bang 🚀🚀💥💥🤤 spread it wide and receive the new year you hoe.
      Cunt-inue being the filthy skank u are 💋💋💋
      DADDY TIME 👴🏼🕙 is 😩💦 CUMMING 💦 At the STROKE 🥵🥵 of 🕛 MIDNIGHT 🕛 BALLS will be 💧SLIDING💧 into 😛🤪 faces as everyone 👯‍♀️ gathers 👯👯‍♂️ around to 3️⃣2️⃣1️⃣ count down a 🎉💦CUMFETTI 💦🎉 storm. Wear your 🍆SLUTTIEST🍆 outfit 👙🩲 while you 💢POP💢 that 🍑ASS 🍑🍑 and 🍾🍾 bottles 🥂 at 🕛 12 o’COCK 🍆🍆 DADDY TIME👴🏼🕙 will make 👉🏽YOU👈🏽 his lil 💥😫 NOISEMAKER 🥴 and fill that 🍑🍑 AULD LANG ASS 🍑 with all his old 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ CUM 💦💦 to 🤰🏻breed🤰🏾🤰🏼 BABY NEW YEAR 👶🏽👶🏻 SHARE THIS WITH 🎉6⃣9⃣🎉. NEW YEAR HOES😉😝😛 BEFORE 😩🍑 2⃣💦0⃣💦2️⃣💦4️⃣or you won't be getting any 🎉party poppers 🎉 popped 💥 inside u this 🎊🎊🍆🍆NEW DICKS DAY🍆🍆🎊🎊
      Whats poppin 💥😳🎉besides 🚫this cherry 🍒 👉🏿👌🏿before 2️⃣0️⃣THOTTY-THREE 😫💦💦 ends🌧✨👅? Pack that ❌❌❌mas💋 tree🎄⛄️ 🆙 ☝🏿and back dat THICC juicy🎈 🅰️SS 🍑 🆙☝🏿☝🏿2️⃣0️⃣1️⃣4️⃣ is here BITCH welcum😈😈😈‼️get ready hoe😝😜meatnight🍗🌠 is cumming 💦🍆 fuck👆🏿😾 your New Years kiss 👄⛔️Grab ✊🏿😋UR Daddy😚 for that New Years kummie🍼🍼🥛🍦. Make sure🎒❗️u prepared💡⏰, this year🌟. You'll need a razor 🚨✂️ because we ain't entering 📛📛januhairy😷🙄👿. Good 💖✅pussy 😼😺always stays ready hoe‼️ COCK those flare guns💥🔫 and watch the fireTWERKS🔥🔥! If you received 💌📭this then that means 🙏🏿😘I'm keen🌱😍😍 for more cummies💦🍦 and new beginnings ✅🌈❤️with you! ☝🏿✊🏿🙌🏿💋💋🆗Now send this 📞📤to your top 1️⃣0️⃣ 🆕 year 🆕 thots to let them know 🤔👀🗣u thinkin of their smooth 😭juicy 😩😩asses💍😻Ignore this if ur a sad lesbian bitch with a dry ass kitty😾 as prickly as ur heart💔
      Happy new year‼️ 202fwhores🍾🍾🥂cunt-gratulations 🥳🥳 on making it 🙌🏽🙌🏽 to another 📆 year. 🐱pussy🐱pop🎈your ➡️way➡️ INTO 2024 and make your 🔥🔥sexy slut 😈😈😈resolutions: 🆕 year, 🆕 girthy 🤌dicks🍆🍆, making your kitty 🐱🐱 cat clap 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽, fireworks in the bedroom 🛌 🎆🎇and starting 2024 off with a 💣💣 BANG 🧨🧨🧨 Ring 💍 in the new year with a glass of 🥂🥂cum-pagne 🍾🍾 and balls 🏀⚽️ dropping ↘️ in your 🥵🤭😮mouth 👄 When the COCK ⏰⏰ strikes 🕛 midnight 📩📩 send this to 2️⃣4️⃣ of your cuntiest cum 💦 guzzling, 🍆 dick sucking, dirty whores 👧👧👦👦 If you get 2️⃣4️⃣ back, your HOLE 🕳️ will be 🍗🍗 stuffed 🦃🦃 with cum all 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ days of 2024 🥥 If you get 1️⃣2️⃣ back, you’re a new REARs 🍑🍑🍑 slut 💃💃 If you get 0️⃣ back, your year will be filled with flaccid cocks 🥺🫣and erectile dysfunction 😩😩😩 So open that 🫦🫦🫦 mouth wide and get ready to 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️guzzle 💦💦 your new years nut 🥜🥜🥜

      New Year’s Eve

      📣🔉🆕🙉🎧LISTEN UP THOTTIES its NEW🆕years🎊📆🌆EVE🙇‍♀️💃and 👌➕we🙌🤓🧍🧍‍♂️🧍‍♀️ALL know 🤓🧐EVE 🍎was the OG 👌☑️☑️🫡SLUT 😩💦💦🌊!!so when that C(l)OCK⏰🕰️🕐🛄strikes👊🥊🖕midnight🕛 lets CUM💦🍆🍆🍑🥚INTO twenty twenty fWHORE 🙌😽🙌🆕with a (big😉🍆)BANG 😩🍑, now 🫵🔻it may be 🅱️ an 🚨💅ELECTION 🇺🇸🇺🇸year but hopefully 🙏 the United ‘BATES 💦👌of america🇺🇸 can CUM 😩☑️👊together 🎉 To celebate 🤔🫨❌❌🙅i mean CELEBRATE 🎊 🍑🍆💦 1️⃣ ONE more cycle 🩸🩸🩸😬around 🍑🏀the SUN 🌞🕶️☀️you may 🤔DO dry 🚫🥃🍸🍹january but 🍑make your 🆕 NEW 🙇🙇‍♀️years RESOLUTION ✅🧾🥅to keep that 👅🙀😹BUSSY 💦💦😩🍑WET 🥳🥰
      👯hey SlutS! 👯💅 Now that we got our yearly 🎁 FUCK 👊🏼from good ole Saint DICK 🎅🏾 it’s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!🗓🍾👅 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ was a LONGG 🍆🍆 and HARD 😉✊🏻😫 year.... we laughed😂😆👌🏼 We cried 😢😖👎 We coughed 💦🤒🤧 we fucked GOOD👍🏻 dick🍆 and 😵😵BAD 😔 dick, 😫 BUTT 🍑 now let’s 👏👏Celebrate 🙌🎉 and watch that 💦🍆BIG 👅 BALL 😎👌🏼 Drop 👄👄 on us! 💃💃 So spread 👐🏽 those 👐🏽 legs 👐🏽 and count down ⬇️ from 🔟 until your man 💪🏾 pops 🎉 his CORK 🍾🍾 into that thirsty 👅thirsty 👅 hole! 🥰🥰 Send this to 2️⃣1️⃣ COCK-BEGGING ✊🏻🍆 WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED 🍑😱 for the next 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ days 😍😍😍
      👯hey SlutS👯💅 HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE👅👅 in 2️⃣0️⃣1️⃣9️⃣had sum⬆️ups😎 and we had sum⬇️⬇️ downs😩 we laughed😂😆👌🏼 We cried😢😖👎 We loved😍👫💏💑💦👪🔐 we fuCJ🍆ked 👌🏼👌🏼good👅 DICK🍆 and 😵😵BAD🍆dICK😒BUTT🍑 now! let’s 👏👏Celebrate 🙌🎉 Nd watch thaT💦🍆👅BALL😎👌🏼 Drop👄👄 on us💃💃 && welCUM IN 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ seNd this to 1️⃣9️⃣of ur SLUTTIEST😩😩💦 fRIENDS😌OF THE 📅📅YEAR😳😌 &’ wish✨👌🏼 theM a 😈😈DIRTY😈 NEW YEARS👏👏 or you wont❌❌ get ANY0️⃣ DICK🍆 next YEAR 😠😠 GEt 0️⃣ back AnD you’ll get 😔😩 LITTLE👶🏼👶🏼DICc🙅🙅🙅🍆 get 6️⃣ back and u’ll 👄Be👌🏼CROWNED👸🏼👸🏼🍆SLUTTIEST SLUT Of 2O2️⃣0️⃣&&& if u get 1️⃣0️⃣❗️ back you get DICKed🍆the🍆😊Fu👌🏼ck down💯💯💯 in 2❗️0❗️2❗️0❗️🍆💯😎😊👏😩💦👅👅👌🏼 

      Look, if you want me to believe any of these new drugs work, dont show me the microscope image

        Comment
        byu/noeyys from discussion
        intressless
        Look, if you want me to believe any of these new drugs work, dont show me the microscope image. Show me the picture of some middle age dude on full NW7 at the end of his rope on suicide watch, and then the after with the same MFer at NW0 with a smile from ear to ear. Only then, i will believe, put that drug on overnight shipping, and mainline that bitch directly on my cock vein. Until then 😴 

        H for “hello, this is the president of the US, I launched a tactical nuke to your location

          H for “hello, this is the president of the US, I launched a tactical nuke to your location. I accidentally fell asleep and my head fell onto the comically big red button that launches all the US nukes (the movies told the truth, before you die, you must know that I do in fact have a comically large nuke firing button, it’s located right next to the one that sends Bob from accounting on a coffee run). It was originally aimed at Russia but while trying to cancel it I accidentally relocated the targeting system to your city (dang new age tech). Anyways, be safe and have a great rest of your day (the next 47 minutes)!” 

          I don’t get it, I’ve played video games my whole life. Its my main hobby.

            Comment
            byu/Bigworrrm89 from discussion
            inblackops6
            I don’t get it, I’ve played video games my whole life. Its my main hobby. I dont really watch TV or Movies. I spend easily 1-3 hours everyday playing video games, for years of my life. They say it takes 10,000 hours to master something, so I should be a master at video games and I will never ever be close to this level.
            
            I genuinely don’t know how the human brain can see, recognize, react, aim, move, shoot all within 0.2 seconds. Whereas my brain is on dial up speed and needs to download the information im seeing, then conduct a meeting upstairs on how to proceed. Then a conflict on decision happens so a voting needs to take place. Then when the unanimous decision is voted on, the message gets sent to my team of hands that have poor communication skills so one aims and then when its time to pull the trigger there’s a delay almost like my trigger finger is a sleeper agent for the enemy and I miss my shot and die. 

            Happy Hanukkah

              Happy 😘 Hannukah 🥳🕎 to ✌ all 🌏 my kosher 🇮🇱 THOTTIES 😏🍑🍑 out there 😜👀. I hope 🙏🙌 you 🤩 dreidel 🔄 dreidel 🔄 dreidel 🔄 that phat 🧀🥕🥘 ass 🍑 over here 👇 and get some 🍆😉 of this forbidden 🚫🙅‍♂️ HAM 🐖. Let the lamp 🛋🧞‍♂️ oil 👳‍♂️ burn 🔥👨‍🚒 twice 👬 as long 😝🤤 to keep that party 🎊👯‍♂️ going!! Remember 🧠 to SHALOM 🤓🧘‍♀️ on the haters 👖 and make sure you L'chaim 🌟 on the schmucks 😘😍!!! 
              👋💰Shalom SLUTS! 👋 Get your tuchus 🍑 ready 🥵 for EIGHT 🎱 LONG 🍆 DAYS 📅 of 🕎HanukkCOCK✡️ to 🎉celebrate🎉 the time 🕍🍷 D-ddy😇 made 1️⃣ drop of CUM💦👅 last for 8️⃣ GAYS 👬🌈😋 Hang up ⛑️ your yarmulke👲🤠 and spin 💞spin💞 SPIN😵‍💫 on daddy's DREIDEL 🍫🪙💦💦 till you get that 🍖✡️KOSHER COCK 😜😫 in your 👼HOLEiest 🕍of HOLES 🕳️😈🙈 send this text💌📩 to 🔟 of your BADDEST 💇‍♀️ ORTHODOX 🧕 BITCHES 💁‍♀️👄 Get 🔟 or more back 🥳🤯 and you'll be a 🕎MENORAH MOMMY💅 Get 5️⃣ back 😚🤪 and you're a 👯👑 jewish-american 🛏️ PILLOW PRINCESS 💗💟 Get 0️⃣ back 🤒🤢 and you'll get SPANKED 🍑💢 like the MACCABAES 💂 spanked ANTIOCHUS IV EPIPHANES👹👑👿 in 💦JerusaCUM🏙️when he wouldn't let them 🙅 celebrate 🙏SUCKot🥺 Chag sameach! 🔯🌠 
              It's time to get up 💤😴 you slutty slutty Jews ✡👅💦💦 get ready for the 8️⃣ days of HANUCOCK 🍆😩😍 hang up your yamaka and get FREAKY 😏😩💦 with other JEWEY 🔯 SLUTS 😘😍😝 you know RABBI is excited for his 8 days of KOSHER 🍖 DICK 🍆🍆 so all of you get out there and find some CIRCUMCIZED COCK 🕎 Send THIS TO 2️⃣5️⃣ of your BADDEST JEW BITCHES get 5️⃣ back and you're a SAD LATKE HOE 😠😟😂get 🔟 back and you're a PENNY PINCHING BITCH 🤑😈😜🍆🎉 get 2️⃣5️⃣ back and you'll be riding DADDIES MENORAH 🕎🕎🕎 ALL NIGHT😝😁🤑😍
              HAPPY HANUKKAH HOES ✡🎉 get ready for 8 nights of sucking DICK! 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 The Jews escaped the desert on 8 nights of oil 🕯🌚 , but you'll do it on 8 nights of CUM 😜💦💦💦! Shove a DREIDEL up your butt✡😬🍑GOBBLE UP a LATKE dick😩👅! Send this to 8 of your Hanukkah THOTTIES👯 for a LIT 🕯Hanukkah! If you get 3️⃣ or less back you're a schmuck🍆! If you get 5️⃣ or more back you're a BAD JEWISH BITCH 👌❗️💁
              👋💰Shalom sluts 👋 happy ✡🕎️ Hanukkah✡️ 🕎 spin 💞spin💞 SPIN on daddy's dreidel✡️ 💦🕎💦🕎💦then ✡️I'll hanuk-cum on yoUr latke🔯 🕎OoOooo 🕎some 🔯🕯️hano౦kkah 🕯️sHit is about to go dOwn tonight😏💰🕍 YoU🕯️ light 🕯mY 🕎menorah🕎 and mAke me want to💦 Dip my ✡️latke iN your 🍎apple 💦sauCE Oooooo 😍I'll wear my💦🔯 yarlmu-cum💦😏 and 💦pEnetrate 👉👌you like how 🇮🇱 Israel 🇮🇱 penetrAtEs👉👌 the 🇵🇸Palestinian🇵🇸 territories 💦💦🔯🔯🔯🔯 ill mAkE u hanuk-💦cum 💦🕎8 TIMES 🕎 for the eiGHT 8️⃣ days 💦puRIFying💦 the 🕍HOly Temple 🕍 and I'll 👏SPANK 💦👏you like the 🔯Maccabees 🔯sPAnked 👏😈Antiochus IV Epiphanes👿 in 💦Jerusacum 💦🇮🇱🕎🕎🔯
              ARE YOU 👉 READY TO DO THE 👠✡WHOREA✡👠????!!! ITS THE 1ST🥇 NIGHT 🌃 OF HORNYKKAH 🤤🤤🤤 TIME TO GET 🕎🔥LIT🔥🕎 AND SPIT 💦💦💦 ON SUM 🙈🐒HAIRYKKAH COCK 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆!!!!!! DONT ❌ WORRY!! 😟 DICKPIG 🍑🐷 PORK 🐷🚫 IS KOSHER ✅🍑🐷 SEND THIS TO 🔟‼ OF YOUR JEWCYIST 👨🏻‍🦱🍑🍆💦 FRIENDS 👬👭👫 GET 0️⃣ BACK 😭😭😭AND YOU'RE A GOY 👿👱‍♀️GET 5️⃣ BACK 😳AND UR A REAL 😏 DREDIAL SPINNER ♻️ GET 8️⃣🕎 🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯OR MORE BACK AND YOURE IN FOR 8️⃣!! DAYS OF RUG BURN!!! 🥵🥵🥵🔥🌡🐒💦💦💦💦
              🔥🔥Alright🔥🔥 MaccaBITCHES 💅, it's deep 🫠 🥴🥴into kiss-lev 💋💄so light🕯🕯your manWHOREas 🙆🏻‍♂🕎 loosen those GELT buckles 🪙👖🪙🤑. Dreidel 🔄 dreidel 🔄 dreidel 🔄 that phat 🧀🥕🥘 ass 🍑 over here 👇😳. This week 🗓, we CUMmemorate 🤤🤤 the DOMINATION💀🏆😉 of the Greek 🇬🇷armies 🪖🪖 and King🤴AntiCHOKEus 😩👐🫶 by 4️⃣ SWEATY 💧OILY 🛢 MEN 😯😵‍💫, and Judah🛡 Maccabee 👨🏽‍⚖ with his 8 inch HAMMER 🍆🔨 🍆🔨. After SPANKING 🖐🤭🍑 their enemies 😡😤👬👬 the MaccaPEENs made sure their temple🍆🍑🌮 🕍😇 was clean 🧹🧼🚿 . There was only 🫨🫨 enough oil💦💦 to lube🌊 up the lamps 🪔💡🧞‍♂️ for one day 😱😱 ‼️ but there was a miracle 🤯🥳 and the flame🔥 stayed 🆙️👆📈⬆️ for 8️⃣ HOLE 🕳⭕️ days 😵‍💫😤😩 Now it's time to grab your man's potatoes 🥔🥔and lick his latkes 👅😋🥞 -- we're doing it 👉👌🛌with the💡 lights 💡ON 😎! Dance the WHORE-a 👯‍♀👯‍♂👡 because NES 👍 GADOL 🍆⬆ HAYA SHAM👇🗺📍 in the sheets🛏! Send this to 3️⃣6️⃣ of your ChanuCUM hoes 👩🏻👵🏼👩🏽‍⚕👩🏾‍🎤👩🏿‍🔧👨🏼‍🚒🤵🏼👷🏾‍♂ for a LIT 🕯🔥 Chanukah! Get 3⃣ back and you’re a schmuck 🤮😞! Get 5⃣ back and Judith🤵‍♀ will bring🧺🛒 you some good🙂‍↕️🥴😏 head 🧠👄🫦👅Get 8️⃣ or more and daddy👨👨 will squirt his warm 🥵🥵 jelly 🍯🍓🍒🫐 and you’ll be STUFFED 😫😏😋 like a SUFGANIYA! 🥖🍩🍩🍩
              MERRY CHRISTMAS 🎄🌲🎄 TO MY HO HO HO’S 🎅🤶🧑‍🎄 AND CHAG SAMEACH 🕎🇮🇱🫵TO MY SEMITIC SLUTS 🤤💦🤤ON THIS DAY 🫣🗓️THE HOTTEST JEW 🕎🥵WAS BORN AND MELCHIOR THE MIGHTY 👑🥇💪CUNTY CASPAR 🍯💅AND BALL-THAZAR 🍆🌳HURRIED TO THE VIRGIN MARY 😇🙏🤰 FOR THE FIRST EPISODE OF MAURY 👨 ONLY TO FIND OUT GOD 🛐⛪️ HIMSELF WAS THE FATHER🫃🫄🤰
              
              WE HAVE ALSO CUM 💦🫣💫TOGETHER TO CELEBRATE 🎉👏🎊 JUDAH RE-INSERTING 🍆🫵🥵 THE MACCABEES INTO 💋🙂🙏THE TEMPLE 🕍🛕🏛️AND BUSTING 🍆💦💋THOSE SELEUCIDS 🙊😱😨OUT OF THEIR HORNY 🥜🥵HOLY 🇻🇦🙌SPOT AND WE CUMMEMORATE 🍆💦‼️EVERY YEAR BY ERECTING🙋‍♀️🍆🙋 OUR MENORAHS 🕎😱🫵AND SPARKING 🔥🚬🍃IT UP LEFT ⬅️TO RIGHT ➡️ FOR 8️⃣ SENSUAL 💦😏💋 DAYS AND EIGHT WILD 🔥🤪🐗 NIGHTS
              
              BUT LEAVE THE HISTORY 🙋‍♂️📠📜 FOR THE GILFS 👵 👴 DILFS 👨👴 AND MILFS 👩🧓ITS TIME TO FIND OUT IF YOU’VE BEEN NAUGHTY 🤪🔥💦 OR NICE 😊☀️🫵 MR AND MRS CLAUS 🎅🤶HAVE BEEN GRINDING ⚙️💦⚙️ UP ON HIS NORTH POLE 💈🍆💦TO DETERMINE IF YOU’RE 🫵🤪🫵 GETTING A BIG TOY 🧸💦🍆 OR A BIG BLACK 🖤✔️📞 LUMP OF COAL 🗿🫨💋 AND HE’S MAKING IT RAIN 💦💦💦 ON ALL YOU JEWISH 🕎🕎🕎 JELQERS 🍆💦💈WITH BAGS OF CHOCOLATE GELT 🪙🍫💦 SO YOU 🫵🫵 CAN HAVE SOME FUN 🤪💦🔥 WHEN SANTA🎅CUMS DOWN 💦🍆⬇️YOUR CHIMNEY 🏠🚿💋THIS YEAR🗓️🗓️🗓️
              
              SEND THIS TO 1️⃣5️⃣ OF YOUR JUDEO-CHRISTIAN HUNNIES 🙏✝️🕎 IF YOU GET 0️⃣ BACK YOU HAVE TO THROAT 🍽️💦⬇️ A GEFILTE FISH 🐟🐠🤪 IF YOU GET 5️⃣ BACK YOU’RE 🫵🫵 A HORNY HEATHEN 🍆💦🙏✝️ IF YOU GET 1️⃣0️⃣ BACK YOU’RE SPINNING 😵‍💫🔥🫨 THAT ASS 🍑🍑🍑 LIKE A DREIDEL 🔝🙏💋 IF YOU GET ALL 1️⃣5️⃣ BACK YOU WILL DICK DOWN 🍆⬇️🤪 THIS HOLIDAY SEASON 🎉🎊🎁