Praise Jessica. Headpat Jessica. Purchase cake for Jessica from her favorite bakery. High-five Jessica completely out of the blue. Embrace BSW. Always hand-feed Jessica her food. Take Jessica into your arms. Hold Jessica's hand on a walk. Toss Jessica her favorite blanket. Judo throw Jessica during her self-defense course. Twist Jessica's pickle jar open. Protect Jessica from the FBI. Sing karaoke with Jessica all night long. Pamper pregnant vision-holder Jessica. Plap Jessica on the beach. Smooch Jessica in the movie theater. Adulate Jessica in the public square. Eat Jessica out. Massage Jessica. Exterminate Jessica's social anxieties. Talk Jessica through her low self-esteem. Treat Jessica to chocolate pudding. Educate Jessica. Mandatory hugs for Jessica. Grind Jessica some parmesan cheese for her macaroni. Drown Jessica in unrelenting love. Grow old with Jessica in marriage. Feed Jessica crepes suzette. Shield Jessica with your body.
TOTAL. JESSICA. LOVE. 💕
I own a rifle for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended.
Four Zomboids break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my Wooden Spear and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first zomboid head, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second zomboid, miss him entirely because my shooting skills aren't high enough and nails the neighbors window causing an alarm to go off.
I have to resort to the pipe bomb stash that i keep in the bedroom, "HEY OVER HERE" the pipe bomb shrapnel kills the other two instantly on spot, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms.
Spear charge the last zomboid. I break my spear trough his skull, since damage to the brain instantly kills them. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Imagine this: you're casually Googling "en Pessant" when, out of the blue, a new response drops like a bowling ball in a library. "Holy hell!" you exclaim, your face contorted into a look that could rival Edvard Munch's "The Scream", wondering what to do in this position.
But this was no ordinary internet glitch; it was a glitch with a twist, turning unsuspecting netizens into actual zombies. You'd think it's just a tech malfunction, but these zombies were as real as the fear of accidentally sending a text to Martin.
Panicked, people started dialing up exorcists faster than you can say, "Is he stupid?" The exorcists scratched their heads, realizing this wasn't your run-of-the-mill possession; it was like trying to exorcise a demon who'd binge-watched every episode of Sherlock Holmes.
As if that wasn't enough, the Church's Bishop decided to take a "vacation" but, you guessed it, he never came back. Some thought he'd embarked on the holiest of quests; others thought he too wasn't fucking welcome here, just like jessica.
Amidst the chaos, a courageous few hatched a plan so audacious it could make a cat meme enthusiast giggle. They opted for a queen sacrifice, not in a chess match, mind you, but in the name of humanity. It was a move so daring it'd make even the most seasoned Redditor brick their pipi.
But as they delved deeper into this nightmarish realm, they soon realized they were caught in a knightmare fueled by fear, and a pawn storm was incoming. In the end, they had to ignite the chessboard of fate, hoping to reset the game and undo the hilariously horrifying madness that had befallen their world.
"When life asks you to Google en Pessant, you know it's a plot twist even Bishop on vacation couldn't fathom!
level 5 gyatt rizz livvy dunne rizzing up baby gronk ice spice what the dog doin skibbidy toilet in real life (only in ohio) alpha sigma male grindset mindset for life
level 5 gyatt rizz livvy dunne rizzing up baby gronk ice spice wat da dawg doin skibidi toilet in real life only in ohio we go jim zyzz creatine alpha sigma cuh dey board
You're so skibidi fanum taxing in the sigma Patrick Bateman 🤡. Level 6 gyatt ong and on Kai Cenat's W rizz. Baby Gronk & Ice Spice doing the grimace shake challenge with smurf cat. Only in ohio does sussy baka peppino pizza tower on the Skibidi Toilet Titan Cameraman, TV Woman, Lankybox and Titan Speakerman. There's nothing we can do.. but me personally I wouldn't let that slide cuh. 🗿🍷 masteroogway, Speedmcqueen, manlikeisaac. Nathaniel B on that goth thug shaker fortnite roblox pass be on South Park, Family Guy and Subway surfers. Fr tho, can he beat American 📸 Sus. Goku? NickEh30 w/ opium bird & cg5. Mommy/daddy? Jit trippin, nahhh das crazy. Do the griddy with the biggest bird in Rainbow Friends and Huggy Wuggy. Doors be the most lightskin stare Travis Scott has ever seen with Drake. Blud got that 1, 2, buckle my shoe PACKGOD vs Leg w/ IShowSpeed on that Garten of Banban rizzler.
I’m for 65 % sure I’m a straight guy, but there is one particular thing I would like to try at least once in my life. Blowjob. Does this fact make me bisexual?
I was never romantically interested in any man. Touching, kissing, anal or anything with other man? For me, quite a gross imagination. But still... I would like to try to give someone a blowjob. I’m just curious how does it feel to have someone’s penis in my mouth. It’s really weird. I’m not sure about my own sexual orientation because of this. I still dream about finding a girlfriend, to love her, to have family with her, but still... I want to try blowjob. Idk why. Is there anyone with same feelings?
