Storytime

Copypasta of a person’s past experience or events that is so absurd it became a meme of its own. Usually untrue stories that tries to circle jerk opinions.

I like being degraded by my math teacher, and it’s getting worse.

I take AP geometry second period even though I nearly flunked last year. I'm currently a sophomore in high school.... nobody knows about this, except for my best friend Anuar. He sits next to me and every time I get the wrong answer, I feel a rush of lust course through my body. Anuar first noticed it when I got the answer wrong on fifth day of class. I still remember it like it was yesterday.....

Summer break is just around the corner and still have this feeling for my teacher. Anuar says that I should try and talk to him, but I can't muster the courage. The way he scolds & humiliates me in front of the whole class is exhilarating. There's something, so weird yet so good about having someone punish you for your mistakes.

I guess you could say I've been a "goodie-two-shoes" my whole life.... so something about this change of pace effects me. I haven't told my family about this, nor do I plan on it. My family has talked about hiring a tutor for me, after seeing my performance decline. Secretly, I know how to do all the problems, and that's why I'm barely passing.

Next year, I will be a junior and most likely have a new teacher for math, and I'm not sure how I'll adapt to this. In hopes of preparing myself for this, I've enrolled myself in summer school to test the waters.

Anyone have advice that's had a similar problem?

I did it, I sucked my own penis

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to- penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out. If I don't update this again please send help.

Update: Just escaped from the pentagon, the government is sending all their military forces to pursue me, my life is currently in extreme peril. They attempted to strip my ability to suck my own penis but I created a shockwave to blast away the researchers before they could touch me. This is bad, I have exhausted all my chromosomes and now I have to hide and replenish my energy while the patrol helicopters fly over me.

UGH my crush saw me fapping in class while I was looking at her!! And her parents r making a “lawsuit” against me. What does that even mean!? 🤔🙄

I am in 5th grade.. I have a crush on this girl her hair smells like roses and her personality is golden so I decided to peacefully fap to her beautiful face in the middle of math because it was SOOO boring 😂😂😂 savage anyways she caught me and i was thinking she liked it making winks and smiling to her but she did not like it. 😒🤔😕so weird. she screamed then she started running to the principal office 😢🙄😬i cant stand that boomer 😂 savage 💯😎 anyway when she reported me she started spreading it 😭🙄🙄🙄😝now people call me weird and a 'loser' like whatt!???? 🙄 im totally a winner and part of the logang ✔️✔️✔️👍😂🥇😎 she now told her parents and im trying to break in her house 🏡😉💪✔️ i will do many things to her since she didnt like my fap 😅😂😂😂😎😎 she geting punsihed 🤣🤣🤣🤣anyways im gonna set the ladder up ✔️🤓😋 then go to her bedroom. 🤗😝😊 Hahahah ok wish me good luck rediit and pls give award so i can share my savage story, 🤣🤣😂😎😎💯💯👍 thanks redit and logang💪😎🤓

My mom threw away my sex doll

I’ve been caught before by my whole family. I was in the living room.

I woke up around 10:00am—and no one was home. I thought: let me jack it.

I couldn’t use my phone because the screen is way to small—So I thought, is there any bigger screen I could use? Then I realised, the TV

I was home alone, I popped out the lube and my sex doll. I was going to town on Justine(the name I gave my Tantaly Sex Doll) until my aunt, grandma, uncle, sisters and mother walked in.

They went to church and came back to find me sinning on the couch. Legs wide open, enjoying Justine’s company was I usually do.

Well, my mother spoke to me about pornography and said, “it isn’t right what those men and women are doing. Porn is evil and just an act of sin.”

She prayed for me, and then the nightmare really kicked in. She wanted to throw away my Tantaly Sex Doll. I begged and pleaded my case. She ask, “where did you even get this from?” I tried countless times to evade the firing questions but was arrested into a corner. I told her, “I brought it online with the debit card I was given for my birthday”

In terms of punishment—she took the card and Justine.

That night I cried so hard BUT at the same time I was also extremely worried about my mental health;— because deep down inside i knew I’ developed emotional feelings for a $299 ($1VAT included) Tantaly Sex Doll.

It’s now been 3 weeks, going onto four. Ever since then, my family thinks different of me. My uncle can’t even look me in eye because I made Grandma faint that day— she had to go into hospital because of what she saw. What shame am I?

Later in time; I got my debit card back and mother now keeps a close eye on my purchases. My therapist says, “it’s good I’ve come to acknowledge and accept all these faults of mine and try change for the better.” It was in these moments when talking to therapist I would masquerade a smile and say, “I’ve finally started talking to real girls my age.”

Everyone now thinks I’m okay and better. They don’t know what I’m truly going through. I missed my Justine (with all my heart) she was the moon light that softy lit the dark corners of my heart.

She wasn’t an inanimate object to me, she was the Juliet to my Romeo; never—never will I forget those scarlet lips that burned as if burning love.

Snail Sexual Oppression

I’ve had a fish tank for almost a year now. I started with 20 snails, and over the course of this year each generation of snail has had daily mass orgies. Now we are probably like on the 50th-60th snail generation. Even quite possibly more than that. Hundreds and hundreds of snails have been born and died. They have become SO inbred that they are now so depressed and slow that they can no longer really move or eat or reproduce like their sexy relatives had once before. Now their numbers are decreasing drastically. Some snails are born over the shells of their deceased inbred relatives and they don’t even make it off the pile of the lost before they themselves pass. It is truly a hell of my own unintentional creation. They thought they could just have huge kinky snail orgies on the regular with no ramifications, but they never thought about the future. They failed to recognize the drastic ramifications of banging the same 20 snails confined to their small 10 gallon glass prison. They only sought to indulge in sin, and now their severely depressed, inbred children must pay the ultimate price.

So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a Konata cosplay

Konata copypasta — This copypasta inspired the Pekora cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house while wearing Konata's blue wig and uniform. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as a tomato and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made me feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my clothes. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said, "Yup."

He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted, "Oh God, Konata!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came.

His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me, "Why did we do that? Now I'm totally gay." But he looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'm still Konata."

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