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Copypasta and circle jerk response to reddit culture or hivemind mentality. Primarily done to ridicule AITA sub or r/relationship_advice absurd nature.


TIFU by committing genocide

    Average Reddit TIFU copypasta
    I was visiting my super hot cousin in Myanmar, she came on to me really hard because she had forgotten that we were related because she was in lust. Somehow I ended sleeping with her and my hot aunt joined in too.

Then I heard my uncle coming up the stairs so I jumped out of the window. I ran into a Buddhist monks armed with machettes and he asked me why I was naked so I told him that I was robbed by a couple of Rohingya. He asked me where the Muslim bastards were and I pointed to my cousins house.

The Buddhists ran in to the house an massacred my relatives and burned down the entire village. The total death toll was somewhere around 3000.

TL DR: I narrowly escaped getting caught having sex with my cousin.

    My son refuses to watch Morbius for the 34 time with me

      Every Morbius memes
      I tried to take him with me to the theater last night thinking he will get back to his senses, but he yelled saying that he is bored.

He even said it wasn’t as good as Spiderman (and later clarified “it was slightly better than the batman tho”)

I am heartbroken and lost. Help.

Edit: I disowned him.

Edit: my son is missing for the past few days. Please help.

Edit: the police at my door, i think im getting arrested.

Edit: do you guys know a cheap lawyer who can reduce my sentence for murder? I need help

      GUYS HELP A WOMAN IS THREATENING ME WITH MY NUDES

        allow me to explain. so there is this woman from Messenger, as i woke up
to a bunch of DMs. we chatted for a bit, and then she asked to see me
on cam. so i did, and things got steamy. being the teen i am, the
hormones was raging in me. a few moments later, she showed me a
recording of me masturbating (i was playing along, and i was pressured
to). now, shes wanting 2500$ and i dont have that money, and she says if
i dont give her the money, shell post it on my fb and i think my
reputation is gonna be ruined. what do i do?

edit: i reported her to my local police and the state troopers. i am now
filing a statement and i am still keeping in touch with her in fears of
the leak i encourage you guys to NEVER open up unknown people in your
DMs, and if things get fishy, BLOCK THEM. edit 2: ok the state troopers
called, and they said to call Petersburg police since we're both in
alaska, im going to give them a call. wish me luck!

        My (27F) husband (40M) watches among us porn. What should I do?

          Among Us porn copypasta
          Hi all, this is my first post so excuse any mistakes. My husband and I have been married for about 5 years now, and it's been a very fulfilling relationship. However, recently I have discovered a problem. My husband has a friend who l'Il call Clive. I saw my husband Ming him about "sussy cheeks" and looked into it. It turns out my husband is an avid fan of the game "among us" and as ridiculous as it sounds he has a terabyte of saved pornography from the game that he shares with Clive. I feel so insecure and am worried about how this will affect our sex life; will he force me to dress like a crewmate?? Advice appreciated.

          Dear r/teenagers please shut up.

            r/teenagers copypasta
            Dear r/teenagers,

Please shut up.

I get it, you’re horny. But nobody wants to hear about all the times you’ve masturbated to your sibling, and nobody wants to hear about һоѡ your tits got in the way of something. Nobody wants to hear your “pwease be my friend 🥺👉👈” crap when posting stuff like this is exactly the reason why you have no friends. You complain about not having bfs/gfs and yet you post garbage with zero self awareness. “Boobs tits or ass” һоѡ about grass you cum stained landwhale. Go outside. Get some vitamin D. Get some friends. Get something other than erection every time you see a woman.

Best,

            Does anyone else feels attracted to female avatar profile pictures on reddit?

              I don’t know why but I kinda get a little turned on when I see them. There’s something about their design that makes them really adorable and I always try to hold myself back from imagining things about them but I can’t help it. They look so tiny and fluffy with a petite body and short height, cute little outfits, a rounded face, big eyes and pretty hair. Like they’re literally so unironically perfect I feel like reddit made them this way on purpose. I grew a habit of direct messaging anyone who have a nice woman avatar and chatting with them because I imagine the person using the account to look the same. I’m not even typing this out to sound like a weirdo i genuinely feel this way and I do hope that I’m not being weird for it. Please tell me there’s someone who feels the same thing