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President

Copypasta related to the president of the United States or other world leaders.


Hey, voter! This is Team Joe and Kamala reminding you

    Hey, voter! This is Team Joe and Kamala reminding you that that sort of thing isn't cool to do. We really hate to do this, but your internet activity has attracted our attention, and not in a good way. We suggest you put down your phone, walk tuah the polls, and VOTE ON THAT THANG, otherwise we may have to put you down for a pre-existing condition and deny you necessary medical coverage, uwu! And please don't make us register you as a Russian agent; if we do, and you're a person of color, we might even have to send you a Native American reservation, to work on uranium mines which absolutely don't exist. So in conclusion, SLAVA UKRAINI, and let's all be good fucking people!
    
    (IMPORTANT NOTICE: this message sent from an FBI location that is on the traditional homeland of one or more Native American peoples. We acknowledge this land was taken as part of an ugly and complicated history of colonial conquest, and uphold the original owners as spiritual keepers in perpetuity).

    H for “hello, this is the president of the US, I launched a tactical nuke to your location

      H for “hello, this is the president of the US, I launched a tactical nuke to your location. I accidentally fell asleep and my head fell onto the comically big red button that launches all the US nukes (the movies told the truth, before you die, you must know that I do in fact have a comically large nuke firing button, it’s located right next to the one that sends Bob from accounting on a coffee run). It was originally aimed at Russia but while trying to cancel it I accidentally relocated the targeting system to your city (dang new age tech). Anyways, be safe and have a great rest of your day (the next 47 minutes)!” 

      Trump Won

        🎉💦OMG, DADDY TRUMP 🎩🏰 just took 🍆 CONTROL of the 🗳️ WHITE HOUSE 😱😱 and all the 🏁 RACISTS 🤵🏽💁‍♂️ came OUT to play! 🍻🤡 Time to POUND 🍑 those homophobic 🎭 CUMMIES DEEP 💦💦 and get ready for a SEXIST 🇺🇸 AMERICA! 🍆💦 It’s time to ABORT The DEMS!!!! 💪🏼 If you voted for the ORANGE SLUT 🍊👉 then you’re ready for a GOP-USSY 🍗🍑 prime-time 🍆 DISASTER 😱😜💋 Like, who needs 🏳️‍🌈 rights when you got TRUMP's MASSIVE 💦🚀 WALL of SEXY!? 😩💦💦 SPEAKING of walls, let's cut a hole in it for his GLORY 🔨🧱 Cage your ❤️❤️LOVE for Donny!! 🔒🔒Like when we caged those kids 🙏🏼🙏🏼😘❤️ BORDER CRISIS? No way José 🚨🚨 Let’s let MAGA shoot allllll those 👅 creamy CUMMIES on the country 🍑🔥👩‍❤️‍👨 Don't forget to SMASH 🍆 that LIKE button and start saving some hush money 👍💦 if you want more of those foul-mouthed 💋🗣️ XENOPHOBIC vibes! 😈🥵🍾 So, after this erection day, prepare for the NASTIEST 🍌🇺🇸 infected party and remember to bring the 🚨🚨 WHIP CREAM 🍦 penicillin and the SPANKING PADDLES! 🍑🖐️ Let's make America 💥 SUCK again, y'all! 🎉🍆🇺🇸 
        🗳️💦‼️WELL, F*CK… HERE WE ARE, TRUMP 2024🍊💯😱 WE’RE SCREWED, SO LET’S GET SCREWING 😫💦 IF WE’RE GONNA RIDE THIS OUT, MIGHT AS WELL RIDE SOMETHING🍆🇺🇸💋 GRAB A PARTNER 👯‍♂️ AND GET READY FOR FOUR MORE YEARS OF RAW DOGGING REALITY 🍑💥 ‘CAUSE THIS NATION’S ABOUT TO GO DEEP 🤯🍑 SO STOCK UP ON LUBE 🧴💦 ‘CAUSE IT’S GONNA BE A ROUGH RIDE, BABY 👀💦😈 SEND THIS TO 🔟 OF YOUR BOLDEST BANG BUDDIES IF YOU’RE DOWN TO MAKE AMERICA MOAN AGAIN 😫🇺🇸💋 AND IF YOU GET 5️⃣ BACK, YOU KNOW YOU WON’T BE FACING THIS ALONE 😏🍆💦 LET’S GO HARD OR GO HOME, PATRIOTS 🗽🔥 
        🇺🇸🦅 WELCOME TO THE POST-ELECTION APOCALYPSE 💀 WHERE KAMALA’S BALLOT BOX 📥 GOT YEETED STRAIGHT TO THE GULAG 🚫🔥 NOW WE’RE STUCK IN THE UNITED SLAY-NO-WAY-STATES 🇺🇸 WHERE TRUMP’S TROMBONE 🎺 IS LOUDER THAN OUR TEARS 😭💦 WILL YOU 🫵 GRAB YOUR KAMALATOES 🐪🍑 AND MARCH INTO THE NIGHT 🌚 OR WILL YOU BOW DOWN 🧎‍♀️ AND ACCEPT THE FRUMPAGE? 😩 LET THIS TRAGEDY BE A REMINDER 🗡️ THAT IN THE LAND OF THE SLAIN 😵💥 WE KEEP STAR SPANKIN’ 👋 AND BOOTY CLAPPIN’ 🍑 FOR THE SLAINSTITUTION 📜💫 SEND THIS ➡️ TO 10 FELLOW KAMALAMATES 🐫 OR GET READY TO BE DECLARED A 🤡 RESIDENT OF FRUMPTOWN 🎺 IF YOU GET 10 BACK, YOU’RE A LEGENDARY 🏆 NATIONAL SLAYVIVOR 🌈 IF YOU GET LESS THAN 5️⃣… CLOWN SHOES 🚪 AND FRUMP HATS 🎩 ARE IN YOUR FUTURE 😱💀 
        🚨ATTENTION‼️FILTHY SLUT-izens of AmeriCUM 🇺🇸 🦅 💦 💦 you’ve STUFFED 😩 those TIGHT little boxes 📦🍑🔞with your ROCK HARD ballots 🪨🍆 💪🏻💪🏻 and the raunchy ERECTION 🥵 🥵 results are CUMMING IN HOT 🔥 🗳️ so BEND OVER 👉🏻 and SPREAD THOSE CHEEKS for DOM ⛓️ DADDY 🍆 💦 DON for the next 4️⃣ FREAKY LONG 📏 and GIRTHY 🪵 🪵 years 🎉 🎊 send 💬 this to 2️⃣7️⃣0️⃣ PUSSY-dential candidates 👩‍⚖️ 🧑‍⚖️ 👩‍💼👨‍💼 and get COVERED in 😏 orange POTUSSY juices 🍊 💦 😫 

        List of Republicans Who Voted Against FEMA Funding Before Helene Hit

          The list — only Republicans voted “no”:
          
          House
          
          Rep. James Baird of Indiana
          Rep. Troy Balderson of Ohio
          Rep. Jim Banks of Indiana
          Rep. Aaron Bean of Florida
          Rep. Andy Biggs of Arizona
          Rep. Gus Bilirakis of Florida
          Rep. Dan Bishop of North Carolina
          Rep. Lauren Boebert of Colorado
          Rep. Mike Bost of Illinois
          Rep. Josh Brecheen of Oklahoma
          Rep. Tim Burchett of Tennessee
          Rep. Eric Burlison of Missouri
          Rep. Kat Cammack of Florida
          Rep. Michael Cloud of Texas
          Rep. Andrew Clyde of Georgia
          Rep. Mike Collins of Georgia
          Rep. Eli Crane of Arizona
          Rep. John Curtis of Utah
          Rep. Warren Davidson of Ohio
          Rep. Byron Donalds of Florida
          Rep. Jeff Duncan of South Carolina
          Rep. Ron Estes of Kansas
          Rep. Mike Ezell of Mississippi
          Rep. Randy Feenstra of Iowa
          Rep. Brad Finstad of Minnesota
          Rep. Michelle Fischbach of Minnesota
          Rep. Russell Fry of South Carolina
          Rep. Russ Fulcher of Idaho
          Rep. Matt Gaetz of Florida
          Rep. Tony Gonzales of Texas
          Rep. Bob Good of Virginia
          Rep. Lance Gooden of Texas
          Rep. Paul Gosar of Arizona
          Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia
          Rep. Morgan Griffith of Virginia
          Rep. Michael Guest of Mississippi
          Rep. Harriet Hageman of Wyoming
          Rep. Andy Harris of Maryland
          Rep. Clay Higgins of Louisiana
          Rep. Jim Jordan of Ohio
          Rep. John Joyce of Pennsylvania
          Rep. Trent Kelly of Mississippi
          Rep. Darin LaHood of Illinois
          Rep. Laurel Lee of Florida
          Rep. Debbie Lesko of Arizona
          Rep. Greg Lopez of Colorado
          Rep. Anna Paulina Luna of Florida
          Rep. Morgan Lutrell of Texas
          Rep. Nancy Mace of South Carolina
          Rep. Tracey Mann of Kansas
          Rep. Thomas Massie of Kentucky
          Rep. Tom McClintock of California
          Rep. Rich McCormick of Georgia
          Rep. Mary Miller of Illinois
          Rep. Max Miller of Ohio
          Rep. Cory Mills of Florida
          Rep. Alex Mooney of West Virginia
          Rep. Barry Moore of Alabama
          Rep. Nathaniel Moran of Texas
          Rep. Ralph Norman of South Carolina
          Rep. Andy Ogles of Tennessee
          Rep. Gary Palmer of Alabama
          Rep. Scott Perry of Pennsylvania
          Rep. Bill Posey of Florida
          Rep. John Rose of Tennessee
          Rep. Matt Rosendale of Montana
          Rep. Chip Roy of Texas
          Rep. David Schweikert of Arizona
          Rep. Keith Self of Texas
          Rep. Victoria Spartz of Indiana
          Rep. Claudia Tenney of New York
          Rep. William Timmons of South Carolina
          Rep. Jeff Van Drew of New Jersey
          Rep. Beth Van Duyne of Texas
          Rep. Derrick Van Orden of Wisconsin
          Rep. Mike Waltz of Florida
          Rep. Randy Weber of Texas
          Rep. Daniel Webster of Florida
          Rep. Bruce Westerman of Arkansas
          Rep. Roger Williams of Texas
          Rep. Rudy Yakym of Indiana
          
          Senate
          
          Sen. Marsha Blackburn of Tennessee
          Sen. Mike Braun of Indiana
          Sen. Katie Britt of Alabama
          Sen. Ted Budd of North Carolina
          Sen. Mike Crapo of Idaho
          Sen. Deb Fischer of Nebraska
          Sen. Bill Hagerty of Tennessee
          Sen. Josh Hawley of Missouri
          Sen. Ron Johnson of Wisconsin
          Sen. Mike Lee of Utah
          Sen. Roger Marshall of Kansas
          Sen. Markwayne Mullin of Oklahoma
          Sen. Rand Paul of Kentucky
          Sen. Pete Ricketts of Nebraska
          Sen. James Risch of Idaho
          Sen. Eric Schmitt of Missouri
          Sen. Tim Scott of South Carolina
          Sen. Tommy Tuberville of Alabama

          Trump answers what action will you take to ensure that our jobs stay in America

            AUDIENCE QUESTION: Thank you so much for coming to Michigan. My name is Ashley and I work at the Chrysler plant. Like many auto workers, I am deeply concerned about the future of our industry. With many jobs being outsourced as we speak, what action will you take to ensure that our jobs stay in America so we can continue to build the best cars in the world here in Michigan?
            
            DONALD TRUMP: So, pretty much as we’ve been saying, and what I want to do is I want to be able to — Look, your business — Years ago in this area, I was honored as the man of the year. It was maybe 20 years ago. Oh, and the fake news heard about it. They said, it never happened. It never happened. And I didn’t know who it was. It was a group that honored me as man of the year. The fakers back there, see the fake news. But they said — They said, oh — And they looked and, you know, they said it never happened. But I said, I swear to you, it happened.
            
            It did happen. I was man of the year. And I came and I made a speech and I said, why do you allow them to take your car business away? Why do you allow it to happen? They’re taking your business away. And I didn’t know too much about it. All I know is they were taking your car industry away from you. They said it never happened.
            
            And lo and behold, somebody said, I remember the event. And then we found out and we had everything. We got the awards. We had everything. It did happen. But I gave a speech, which at the time was pretty controversial. We can’t let them take your car business away. It’s such an important business.
            
            And you know it’s an important business even in times of war where they switch over. And it was really something. And I looked at that speech from, I don’t know, it’s like 19, 20 years ago. And I could repeat it now without changing a word.
            
            You cannot let foreign countries, and a lot of the times our worst foes are our so-called friends, okay? You know, our friends, the European Union takes tremendous advantage of us. As an example, they give us cars by the millions. We don’t have too many Chevrolets in the middle of European cities, okay? European Union is brutal. They don’t take our farm products for the most part. They don’t take a lot. But unlike Kamala, who always complains and doesn’t do anything, I keep saying, why don’t you do?
            
            I saw Marsha the other day. Why doesn’t she, why didn’t she do it four years ago almost? And I say that, you know, she’s on the border today trying just to, what a day for the border. She goes to the border today, and they just announced just before she got up to speak that more than 13,000 murderers from jail, solitary confinement people in many cases, were released.
            
            But I just say, let’s go back. So we can’t let them take our businesses. And we’re not gonna let them take our businesses. And you can control that so easily through good policy. Not her kind of policy, by the way. She changed her policy 15 times. No fracking. Oh, I like fracking. Defund the police. She wants to defund the police. Now, oh, I love the police all of a sudden. By the way, when anybody is into defunding the police even for a day during their career, they can no longer serve as President of the United States, I can tell you.
            
            So we’re not gonna let them take our businesses. And really, a lot of that’s determined by our taxation policy. When China has to pay all that money, the people that liked me the best were the steel companies because I saved them. They were dumping China and others, but mostly China was dumping steel in here at levels that nobody had ever seen before.
            
            And it was putting the steel companies out of business. I put a 50% and 100% tax on the dumping of steel and the steel companies thrived. I saved them, and you have to have the steel companies. So we’ll do the same thing.
            
            And you don’t worry about it. Here’s what you have to do. I only ask you to do one thing, and then you can sleep beautifully all night long, go to a job you love, and get a lot of money at the end of the week. You know what the thing is? Vote for Trump. If you vote for Trump, everything’s gonna be perfect.
            
            Source: https://www.youtube.com/live/it1J3V5QqMk?t=5661&si=tFY8IY7dE9xqQ_rj 

            I’m voting for the First Amendment and freedom of speech. I’m voting for the right to speak my opinion and not be censored.

              Someone recently asked me why I like Trump. My answer was that I don't really like a lot of things about Trump.  
              But this election is not about choosing the most likeable person. 
              We are voting between two vastly different ideologies. We are voting for the country we want to leave our children and grandchildren. 
              Trump represents that future and has proven that he can deliver. He is a patriot to the core and even served his country for 4 years without pay.
              That moment when someone says, 
              "I can't believe you're voting for Trump". I simply reply, “I'm NOT voting for Trump.”
              I'm voting for the First Amendment and freedom of speech. I'm voting for the right to speak my opinion and not be censored. 
              I’m voting for secure borders and LEGAL immigration. I am voting for election integrity to include mandatory voter ID.  (Why would anyone vote against this?)
              I'm voting for the Second Amendment and my right to defend my life and my family.
              I'm voting for the police to be respected once again. 
              I am voting for law & order and an end to allowing protesters to trespass and burn our cities, destroying innocent small business. (Tim Walz)
              I am voting for personal responsibility and the end of the revolving door where criminals are being put back on the street. (Kamala Harris)
              I'm voting for the next Supreme Court Justice(s) to protect the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.
              I’m voting for a return of our troops from foreign countries and the end to America’s involvement in foreign conflicts.
              I'm voting for the Electoral College and for the Republic in which we live.
              I’m voting for the continued appointment of Federal Judges who respect the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.
              I’m voting for keeping our jobs to remain in America and not be outsourced all over the world - to China, Mexico and other foreign countries.
              I am voting for doing away with all of the freebies given to all of the illegals and not looking after the needs of the American citizens and homeless veterans. 
              I'm voting for the military & the veterans who fought for this country 
              I'm voting to keep men out of women's sports.
              I’m voting for peace progress in the Middle East.
              I’m voting to fight against human/child trafficking.
              I'm voting for Freedom of Religion. 
              I am voting for the return of teaching math, history, and science instead of the indoctrination of our children. 
              I'm not just voting for one person. 
              I'm voting for the future of my Country.
              I'm voting for my children and my grandchildren to ensure their freedoms
              America is the greatest country in the world, hense why everyone wants to immigrate here. So why do you want to change it? 
              Why do politicians want to enact policies that have failed in other countries throughout history?  
              I'm not voting for Trump. 
              I'm voting for America. 
              I have decided that I WILL NOT be voting for Donald Trump.
              I'm voting for the First Amendment and freedom of speech. I'm voting for the right to speak my opinion and not be censored.
              I’m voting for secure borders and LEGAL immigration. I am voting for election integrity to include mandatory voter ID. (Why would anyone vote against this?)
              I'm voting for the Second Amendment and my right to defend my life and my family.
              I'm voting for the police to be respected once again.
              I am voting for law & order and an end to allowing protesters to trespass and burn our cities, destroying innocent small businesses.
              I am voting for voter ID’s
              I am voting for personal responsibility and the end of the revolving door where criminals are being put back on the street.
              I'm voting for the next Supreme Court Justice(s) to protect the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.
              I’m voting for a return of our troops from foreign countries and the end to America’s involvement in foreign conflicts.
              I'm voting for the Electoral College and for the Republic in which we live.
              I’m voting for the continued appointment of Federal Judges who respect the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.
              I’m voting for keeping our jobs to remain in America and not be outsourced all over the world - to China, Mexico and other foreign countries.
              I am voting for doing away with all of the freebies given to all of the illegals and not looking after the needs of the American citizens and homeless veterans.
              I'm voting for the military & the veterans who fought for this country
              I'm voting to keep men out of women's sports.
              I’m voting for peace progress in the Middle East.
              I’m voting to fight against human/child trafficking.
              I'm voting for Freedom of Religion.
              I am voting for the return of teaching math, history, and science instead of the indoctrination of our children.
              I'm not just voting for one person.
              I'm voting for the future of my Country.
              I'm voting for my children and any future grandchildren to ensure their freedoms
              America is the greatest country in the world, hence it is why everyone wants to immigrate here. So why would anyone want to change it?
              Why do politicians want to enact policies that have failed in other countries throughout history?
              I'm not voting for Trump.
              I'm voting for America and it just so happens that Trump is the one that shares my values.