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Jokes

Copypasta related to an internet joke.


How firetruck sex sounds like

    The sound of a firetruck
    weewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewoobeepbeepbeepweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewoobeepbeepbeepweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewooweewooweeweewoobebebebebevrrrrrrrrteteteteteweeewooweewooweewoorakarakarakabebebebebybybyskkskskskweewooweewoobeepbeepbeepweeweeweewee

    An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American…

      Walks into a bar joke
      An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turk, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean
      
      all go to a bar..
      
      The doorman stops them and says "Sorry, I can’t let you in without a Thai.

      Rick and Morty copypasta but it’s Morbius

        To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Morbius. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Morbius’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Vampire literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Morbius truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Morbius’s existential catchphrase "I am Morbius," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev’s Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Daniel Espinosa’s genius wit unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂
        
        And yes, by the way, i DO have a Morbius tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 morbIQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid 😎

        A dirty joke from the 1400s…

          In Florence, a young woman, somewhat of a simpleton, was on the point of delivering a baby. She had long been enduring acute pain, and the midwife, candle in hand, inspected her secret area, in order to ascertain if the child was coming. “Look also on the other side,” said the poor creature, “my husband has sometimes taken that road.”
          
          From “The Facetiae Or Jocose Tales of Poggio”, a joke book published in the 1400’s by Poggio Bracciolini:

          This is vladimir Putin, President of Russia

            Putin copypasta
            This is vladimir Putin, President of Russia
            
            Some people kidnapped me and put my duplicate in Russia. I didn't start the war, he did. I escaped and now hiding in your country. Can you send me 3000rs so I can go back to Russia and stop this war. This is real me.

            little german boy don’t go into #nsfw

              Boobtitten analcocken
              no little german boy don’t go into #nsfw
              
              ach mein gott dis channel ist full of boobtitten
              
              oh mein gott! weiner schnitzels!!!
              
              Oh mein gotten it isch full of analcocken
              
              the voman and other voman can kissenfucken? das good very good