h-hewwo...owunce of weed pwease >///< arigato... dealer-kun puts weedie-chan in bong and inhales waaah!! (╯✧▽✧)╯ daisuki cannabis desu~! (^ ω ^ )uwaaa! weedie-chan i feel so kimochi!!(〃°ω°〃) hehe~ ur deep inside me now x3 o-o-owo swenpai pweasey weasy cwan i bwe punished? (•ω•) pwease sway wes im hworny ;3 i want-want ywou to gwo h-hard and f-f-f-f-f-fast....ah~ >/////< oh sweet mwother owf onii-chan.....AH~ it hwurts swenpai :( but i wove it ;3 i'm daddies wittle tide pod hehe (ꈍ꒳ꈍ)i'm all squishy and wet for daddy! (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ he loves how my bitter taste nuzzles his taste buds and my Botanical Raintm scent!!!! (。・ω・。)but he knows how im not meant to be eaten...(´･ω･`)waaah!!! dont eat all of me daddy( ；∀；) hehehe my soap-pussy is so wet >///< 1 lick 2 lick 3 lick 4... no more daddy i'll break~(●///▽///●) hehe i'm daddies wittle tide pod so wet and squishy =w=
Started from a random tweet in 2019 which blew up due to its absurdity. The pasta is often known as the “Raccoon copypasta” nowadays.
The human anus can stretch up to 7 inches before taking damage.
A raccoon can squeeze into holes as tight as 4 inches, Meaning you can take almost two full raccoons up your ass. Believe in yourself.
LOL - us diaper fetish folk also think Taylor is ICONIC. My amazingly witty partner was changing my nappy the other day and she - with *zero* hesitation- said “The tortured poops department.” I laughed until I cried. Absolutely iconic.
Original Tweet
LOL - us diaper fetish folk also think Marvel movies are epic. My amazingly witty partner was changing my nappy the other day and she - with *zero* hesitation- said “Whew! Did Thanos wear thus fricken diaper or what?” I laughed until I cried. Absolutely epic.
Parody of the Vaporeon copypasta but changed to chess specifically the pawn.
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female chess breeding, The pawn is the most compatible chess piece for humans? Not only are they capable of transitioning into other pieces, which is usually the queen, The pawn are an average of 5 cm’ tall and 15 grams, this means they’re large enough to be able handle average reddit users dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to En passant, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly En passant based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Pawn would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Foward, Capture, promote, and En passant, along with not having fur to hide their material, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities En passant and Capture, they can easily commit acts of vore. No other chess piece comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your pawn turn white. Pawn is literally built for human dick.
I wish clown girls were an actual race of people. Their entire skin is white. The clown nose is natural. Their nipples and pussy lips, aka Clussy, have alternate colors, sometimes the same as the lips. Their skin probably tastes funny Imagine the taste of their breast milk. Grabbing their breasts or ass causes a honk noise. Want to playfully grope Clown wifes butt in public, loud ass honk is heard echoing from her. Everyone turns to you too, knowing full well what is going on. She embarrassingly honks her nose, trying to play it off.
I WISH CLOWN GIRLS WERE A REAL HUMAN RACE, THEIR WHOLE SKIN IS WHITE, THEIR CLOWN NOSES ARE NATURAL, THEIR NIPPLES AND VAGINAL LIPS (ALSO KNOWN AS CLUSSY) HAVE ALTERNATING AND SATURATED COLORS... THEIR SKIN PROBABLY TASTES FUNNY, IMAGINE THE TASTE OF THEIR BREAST MILK! SQUEEZING THEIR TITS OR ASS MAKES A CLOWN HORN SOUND, YOU SQUEEZE YOUR WIFE'S FAT WHITE BUTT IN PUBLIC AND A LOUD CLOWN HORN SOUND ERUPTS FROM HER BEHIND, EVERYONE LOOKS AT YOU, KNOWING EXACTLY WHAT HAS JUST TRANSPIRED, AND SHE TENACIOUSLY SQUEEZES YOUR NOSE BACK, TRYING TO COVER UP HER EMBARRASSEMENT.
i wish clown girls were a real breed of humans, their entire skin is white, the red nose is natural, the nipples and vaginal lips (also known as clownssy) have alternate colors, their skin probably have a fun taste , imagine the taste of the breast milk, squeezing their breasts and ass make a horn sound. you squeeze your clown-wife's butt in public and a loud horn sounds by her, then everyone looks at you knowing exactly what you've done, and then she stimidly squeeze your nose to get it out
Holy fucking shit chess is one of those games that i cannot be caught in public playing because whenever i do, just like how you can pin pieces in chess i wanna pin the (specifically white) bishop’s tight little wood pussy to a my gloryhole so i can fuck to my hearts content, something about the bishop is just so fuckable tbh, like the lil diagonal hole on its face reminds me of a lil clit that is in need of DICK, holy hell that shit makes lose my edging streak everytime its insane. And the way it moves so elegantly in diagonal directions across the chess board is hot as fuck, like the way that little whore of a chess piece moves around the board makes me forget that splinterdick is a thing after i start fucking its wooden pussy.
