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Cursed Thoughts

Cursed thoughts shared in discussions that is ridiculous and absurd in nature that it became a meme. Usually about popular characters and people.

Sucking your own dick is one of the most red pilled heterosexual acts you could possibly do

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    byu/Oreo_Gore from discussion
    inkitchencels
    Sucking your own dick is one of the most red pilled heterosexual acts you could possibly do as long as you think about a woman while doing it.

Putting a full cock into your mouth might sound gay, but I don't subscribe to the kantian idea of a strict maxime. After all, you're not gay because you masturbate as long as you masturbate to women. Touching dick might make you gay but not if you touch your own.

Following that logic, sucking dick might be gay, but sucking your own dick to a picture or thought of a woman is not homosexual deviancy, it's an ascended form of heterosexual masturbation + you are getting your dick sucked.

So it's not just not gay to suck your own cock, it's one of the most heterosexual things imaginable as you are actively receiving head, putting you into the alpha position.

    The year is 2045. Norway lives under SWEDISH RULE.

      Its a shitpost meme from 4chan referencing a BBC erotica book with a synopsis similar to the one in the meme. 

      The year is 2045. Norway lives under SWEDISH RULE. All Norwegian men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Norwegian women are breeding stock for Swedish alphas.

‘GAME OVER, NORWEGIAN BOY!’

      Fallout New Vegas version

      The year is 2045. New California lives under LEGION RULE. All NCR men are sissified, and dominated. Californian women are breeding stock for LEGION alphas.

‘GAME OVER, NCR BOY!’
      The year is 2281. The Mojave lives under CEASARS LEGION RULE. All NCR men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. NCR women are breeding stock for LEGION alphas.

‘GAME OVER, REPUBLIC BOY!’

      Cyberpunk 2077 version

      The year is 2077. Night city lives under ARASAKA RULE. All chooms are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Night city women are breeding stock for Arasaka alphas.

‘GAME OVER, CHOOM!’

      Elder Scrolls

      The year is 201 of the fourth era. Skyrim is under NORD RULE. All mer are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Imperial women are breeding stock for Nord alphas.

'SKYRIM BELONGS TO THE NORDS, MILK DRINKER'
      The year is 400 of the third era. Morrowind is under DUNMER RULE. All Argonians are fed skooma, sissified, and dominated. Argonian women are breeding stock for N'walphas.

'MORROWIND BELONGS TO THE DARK ELVES, HISTCEL'.

      Byzantine & Ottoman

      The year is 1453. Byzantium lives under OTTOMAN RULE. All Greek men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. Greek women are breeding stock for Turkish alphas.

‘GAME OVER, BYZANTINE BOY!’

      Old England 

      The year is 1066. England lives under NORMAN RULE. All English men are fed hormones, sissified, and dominated. English women are breeding stock for Norman alphas.

'GAME OVER, SAXON BOY!'

      65 million BC

      The year is 65 million BC. The Earth lives under MAMMAL RULE. All dinosaurs are fed hormones, birdified, and dominated. Sauropsid women are breeding stock for synapsid alphas.

'GAME OVER, ARCHOSAUR BOY!'

      Should the Dallas Mavericks kill 5 of their players to trigger a disaster draft to improve their roster?

        Came from a shitpost on the NBACirclejerk subreddit.

        The NBA disaster draft is a contingency plan to be used when 5 or more players on a team have died or have been dismembered. In the draft, the team whose players died will be able to draft the amount of players from other teams equivalent to how many they had lost.

Other teams though are only allowed to protect 5 players from being drafted, but many teams have good sixth men that are available such as Bronny James or Thanasis Antetokounmpo. With the Mavs having bad contracts on underperforming such as Klay Thompson and Anthony Davis, but they could also just kill 2-way players and bench warmers to fill out those 5 kills to get the disaster draft.

Also, according to Bill Simmons, the team would also get the first pick in the 2029 draft. Now that draft class is weak so I could understand their urgency, while being a repeat offender, that is, killing 5 players on your team on 2 separate occasions could raise some eyebrows, but this could still greatly improve them.

No doubt killing your players with bad contracts and then killing your benchwarmers for sixth men would would greatly improve them and other teams. What do you guys think, and should any other teams do this and who should they kill?

        I Used To Have This Webkinz

          Its from a deleted Tweet by @frindle_babbin of his Webkinz that he would pour milk on and suck it back out. The Tweet became a meme and people would often repost the same Tweet but with their own plushie or toy.

          I used to have this webkinz that i used to pour milk on and suck the milk back out of and it was sopping wet all the time 😭I used to slam it against walls and it would make a loud thud
          My brother saw me suck milk out of it once and I got sad when he made fun of me and i didn’t pour milk on it for a week, and it got rock hard and smelly and my mom had to throw it away
          IT WAS SO FRICKING HEAVY I brought it to school one time and my backpack was soaked and I made my friends hold him and they were upset

          Hannah Montana pillow

          source
          i used to have this hannah montana pillow that i used to pour milk on and suck the milk back out of and it was sopping wet all the time 😭i used to slam it against walls and it would make a loud thud

          I want to fuck a toaster

            I want to fuck a toaster. Just the thought of stuffing my dick in a tight little breadslot makes me rock hard. I could fuck it on the counter, on the kitchen table, or anywhere else it wants. I could dress up like a maintenence tech for some sensual roleplay beforehand. I am a slave to the toaster's whim. I want to stick my fingers inside the bread slot and whisper "yeah you like that you toasty bitch?" Then I want to mount it when it's good and teased and then gyrate my hips like a rabbit with tourettes until my melted cock explodes inside the toaster's tight slot. When I'm done my dick will look like a burnt sausage that had it's casing popped open with melted cheese dripping out of it and the thought of that makes me want to break into a Walmart again. Goddamn I want to fuck a toaster.

            Imagine being Donkey Kong in that scene and having to be all like “damn, Candy Kong, you fuckin’ fine

              source

              Its referencing a classic 4chan pasta about Arnold Schwarzenegger in the movie True Lies but changed to Donkey Kong. It was posted in a gaming shitpost group in FB before becoming a meme.

              Imagine being Donkey Kong in that scene and having to be all like "damn, Candy Kong, you fuckin' fine, all sexy with your tight body and gorgeous face. I would totally have sex with you, both my character and the real me." Like seriously imagine having to be Donkey Kong and not only she stands in there while she winks at you and tells you to come and fuck her, the favorable lighting exposing her beautiful brown fur and smooth skin, and just stand there, take after take, hour after hour, while she perfected that scene as a reward for buying Bonjo Blast from her. Not only having to tolerate her monstrous mommy milkers but her naughty attitude as everyone on set tells her she's STILL GOT IT!! and DAMN, CANDY KONG LOOKS LIKE THAT??!! because they're not the ones who have to sit there and watch her irresistible fucking angel face contort into types of hotness you didn't even know existed before that day. That big gorilla bastard have been fucking nothing but a healthy diet of blondes and supermodels and later alleged rape victims for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies in DK Island. You've never even seen anything this fucking sexy before, and now you swear you can taste the sweat that's breaking out of her pits as she standing there suggestively at you, smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to stand there and revel in her "statuesque (for that is what she calls herself)" beauty, the beauty she worked so hard for with personal trainers in the previous months. And then the director calls for another take, and you know you could give a raise to every single person in this room before the studio secretly could put her down. You really want to have sex with that tight blonde monkey pussy, but you stand there and resist the urge to fuck her, because you're fucking DONKEY KONG and you're starting in a video game made for kids. You're going to lose your future career over this. Just bear it. Hide your face and bear it.