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CSGO

Archive of all known CSGO copypasta about pro players to Valve’s meme response to Hiko’s missed shots to the 48 year old man from Somalia.


You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

    AZER from osu!

    It was originally for AZER (an OSU player) back in 2017 which then got adopted for Alex19 in CSGO and so on. Nowadays the pasta is often used for whichever player fans are gonna cheer on.

    AZER (osu!)

    AZER isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such aim ability and movement with a tablet? Alex puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Cookiezi breaks records. Rafis breaks records. Azer breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

    TenZ (Valorant)

    TenZ isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an aim and movement? Tyson puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. aspas breaks records. zekken breaks records. TenZ breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

    Alex19 (CSGO)

    Alex19 isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with fox? Alex puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. mang0 breaks records. Armada breaks records. Alex19 breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.

    You motherfuckers don’t even know what the real GRIND is

      You motherfuckers don’t even know what the real GRIND is, I have been grinding whole my life to get where I am today. I have been grinding when there was no online qualifiers every 2nd week, no Tier2 events to prove yourself anywhere, no faceit or whatsoever.

      Ji Tu – Art of Choke

        G2 team in CS2

        Similar to the Hu Xi copypasta, its a troll on G2 Esports by romanization of the player and team names into Chinese. Snax, NiKo, huNter, m0NESY, malbsMd and G2 has been changed into their respective Chinese equivalent.

        Counter Strike 2

        🈵JI TU🈵ART OF CHOKE🈵MAO NI ZHI🈵 EM MA DI 🈵 HAN TA 🈵 XI NAX 🈵 
        Ji Tu - Art of Choke

Starring Snak Su, Ni Koh, Han Ta, Mo Neh Xi, and Mal Sem Di.

        Valorant

        🈵 JI TU 🈵 ART OF CHOKE 🈵 ZHOU NA PI 🈵 WA LIN 🈵 ZHAO GE MO 🈵 LI FU 🈵 TLENT 🈵 
        JI TU BigPhish ART OF CHOKE BigPhish FA LIN BigPhish TLENT BigPhish ZHAO GE MO BigPhish ZHOU NA PI BigPhish LI FU

        He operates in the half-space between causality and chaos. His velocity isn’t speed, it’s spatial entropy.

          It came from a Twitter post about Omar Marmoush who is a footballer for Manchester City.

          Omar Marmoush operates in the half-space between causality and chaos. His velocity isn't speed, it's spatial entropy. He doesn’t run behind the defence; he quantum-leaps into unoccupied xThreat zones, disrupting vertical compactness and destabilising low-block temporal integrity

          Counter-Strike 2

          tn1r operates in the half-space between causality and chaos. His flicks aren’t speed, it's spatial entropy. He doesn’t lurk behind the defence; he quantum-leaps into unoccupied xThreat zones, disrupting vertical compactness and destabilising CT side temporal integrity.

          Thats fucking esports right there

            It’s the “Thats fucking football right there” copypasta but changed into CS in response to NiKo smashing his table on LAN. The incident has become an iconic CS moment hence the memes.

            Thats fucking esports right there. None of that pansy ass dick tugging smile for the webcam bullshit. NiKo punches, NiKo bleeds on the stream, NiKo delivers their new born baby on their HyperX Alloy Elite 2 Mechanical Gaming Keyboard™. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball Counter-strike fuck it chuck it shoot it game time shit. Esports are back, baby

            That’s fucking CS right there

            Because that's fucking cs right there. None of that pansy ass dick tugging hide behind the wall bullshit. Men wave, men throw thumbs up to the other team, men transform into eco hounds on the front lines. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball CS fuck it chuck it game time shit. CS is back, baby.

            tarik – Unfortunately, teams require team players and he hasnt quite obtained that skill yet

              Comment
              byu/killinginthenameo from discussion
              inGlobalOffensive

              Its a CS copypasta where “hazed” gave his take on why “tarik” isn’t on a team. 

              Ive been friends with him for about 3 years and talk to him pretty much everyday as we and a bunch of other players hang out in the same mumble for years now. He is insane. His individual play is absurd. Anyone can vouch for that. A lot of you are questioning why he isnt on a team if he can be so good. Its simple, he plays for himself. He always has. If he cared more about his team play, he would be on NCG in my place i can guarantee you that. He is far better than me individually but he has no regard for team play.

Unfortunately, teams require team players and he hasnt quite obtained that skill yet. Im hoping he will some day as he would be a problem for any team to deal with.