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Simp Copypasta

Browse every Simp copypasta from the infamous Discord message “can we honestly e date?” to the classic “*JAW DROPS humina humina awooga” copypasta.


I can’t wait any longer for Isabelle’s pussy.

    Holy fucking shit. There are less than 2 days left until animal crossing comes out on the switch and I can't wait any longer. I need to see Isabelle in 1080P HD 60FPS, and I need to see her NOW. Not only is she the love of my life, but I fucking need more rule 34 of her. There is nothing more fucking hot than Isabelle, and the new game's release will (If my calculations are correct) cause a massive flood of new Isabelle rule 34. I have harassed everyone I've found with an early copy, and I've tried to convince them to give it to me in every way I know. That includes offering my mum's credit card (that's fucking revenge for trying to take away my 3DS you bitch), death threats, begging, and other typically effective means. So if anyone has an early copy, please give it to me. I physically cannot wait any longer for Isabelle.

Please.

    I want to fuck mitochondria.

      I want to fuck mitochondria. I fantasize every night about pumping my throbbing dick into the warm, soft cristae of those sexy powerhouses. I want to feel the buzz of energy as the electrons orbit in the gravitational field of my massive cock. I want to feel the hot tightness of the mitochondrial membranes rubbing against my dick as I thrust it in and out of ATP synthases until I orgasm, washing the mitochondria with my cum like a tidal wave and mixing my own DNA with that of the mitochondria. Just thinking about it makes me want to explode with sexual energy.

      ok simp 😎

        Oh, so you support your girlfriend?

You simp. Okay Homer SIMPson. You absolute simpanzee. OOO OOO OO OO EE EE OO 🐒 <- that is you. You are nothing but sludge . You are putrid muck given form, weakness personified. I am not sympathetic. You are simp pathetic.

        asian girl

          so today at school i saw this hot girl. super hot. super asian. chinese btw. she speaks mandarin. so anyways she had like the fattest ass ever and im talking fucking fat like FAT like so big you could see it from the front. so i walk up to her like i got a lot of money. my dad always taught me walking confident will boost your confidence. i like my dad but he sucks cats tits and i hate that. its a habit im trying to get him to stop. he says its beneficial to his health or whatever. so after i walk up to her like my cat-tit-sucking dad taught me to i say hi. she says hi back. im staring into her lips as i feel an intense feeling of euphoria. just her voice was enough to nigga knock my socks off. i ask her what cup size she wears and she says her boobs are too big for a bra. as shes talking i take the moment to stick my face into her fat titties and motorboat the shit out of them. she then stepped on my cock and balls and popped my scrotum. semen and blood were flying everywhere and it was so sexy. AWOOOOOOGAAAAA i yell. she then calls me a weirdo so i walk away. what should i do?