He started doing this about a year ago and won't stop. It's so annoying and I've told him I don't think it's funny or sexy but he called me a "land lubber" and a "scurvy dog" then threatened to "plunder my booty." I told him I was serious and he said he'd try to stop but that was several months ago and it's like he can't stop and it's some kind of compulsion. Otherwise our sex life is great but just the other night when I took off my underwear and spread my legs he cried out "Thar she blows! Ready the harpoon lads!" Which I definitely didn't appreciate the whale comparison (I am not overweight) and when he finished he yelled out "Yaaaaaaar!" Like a pirate and I just rolled my eyes.
At this point I don't think he can help it and it might be a kink of his or something so I'm trying to just go along with it and be supportive even though it's very weird. This is literally the most obnoxious thing my husband does so I'm luckier than a lot of women I guess.
Context: My(16f) boyfriend(16.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001m) and i started dating around 3 months ago.
We met at this wonderful, cozy cafe that just had this amazing atmosphere and i immediately knew he was the one. Obviously, the first thing I asked him was his age, because, i didn't want to get groomed. It was a huge relief when he told me he was 15.748393837394049838283744929837594027264829837493929474893920753902973 years old, because i also happened to be that exact same age at the time (or so i thought). I was still a bit cautious though.
Fast forward to around 2 weeks ago, it was our birthday. The two of us were just celebrating, when we suddenly got a call from the hospital, informing us that my boyfriend's time of birth had been incorrectly registered as 1 Planck time (about 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) lesser than it actually was, due to a malfunction in the 45 ton quantum clock operating in the hospital at the time. (It's supposed to count seconds based on the orbital period of an electron in an atom of Silicon, but apparently, it was uncalibrated.) This meant he was actually 1 Planck time older than me.
I immediately started freaking out and, in a panic, anticipating i was about to get groomed, pushed my boyfriend down the stairs. Looking back on it, it might have been an overreaction, but it was in the heat of the moment, and i wasn't thinking straight. He ended up breaking his C1, C3, T7 and L3 vertebrae, and has yet to wake up from his coma.
Without him, I've been having a lot more time to think, so i began wondering if a 1 Planck time (0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) age gap is too much? Like, i know it's probably fine... but I'm just not comfortable dating someone that much older. I'm honestly thinking about breaking up with him if he ever wakes up from his coma. I just wouldn't be able to live in constant fear of being groomed. What do you guys think??
35m my mom went to get me food but she has been gone for three hours. If she's not home we will be stuck with only frozen pizza and French fries. She's making me really upset.
Edit- curly fries not the regular crap
Another edit- she said she got stuck in a storm but it wasn't even raining hard? Ig the issue is resolved though. I got of a video call with her and she told me not to tell my dad she was gone so long. The camera was shaking and there was a lot of grunting and cooing. I think she is going to the gym and doesn't want me to know.
This is your fault.
If you had not disagreed with me in your comment, I would not have had to administer one (1) downvote to your comment.
Regrettably, however, you have decided to disagree with me in your comment, and as such, following the etiquette of Reddit.com (Reddiquette, as my fellow Redditors and I call it), I have been forced to administer one (1) downvote to your comment.
I understand if you are a new user on Reddit.com, but we all have to learn the Reddiquette at some point, and it seems today is your day to learn.
Let it be known, however, that you can also administer one (1) downvote to any comment of your choosing. Personally, I would use this one (1) downvote on someone who is reposting a meme, as that is a well known violation of Reddiquette.
It started a while ago. I was a normal redditor making posts and comments, but then one day, a post of mine was manually deleted, and I was banned from my favorite subreddit.
I then got extremely aroused.
That moderator asserted dominance on me by censoring me, making me unable to express myself. I was soaking wet.
I sent the hot sexy mod a message asking why I was banned, then the hot sexy reddit incel mod called me an idiot, and told me to beg to get unbanned. My nipples immediately filled with blood as I begged the hot mod to unban me.
After that, I started doing everything I could to make hot sexy mods mad. Most of my accounts have under negative 100 k@rma, and i'm banned from dozens of subreddits.
I've been a bad redditor, and need to be moderated.
Please moderate me, hot sexy reddit mods.
I'm posting this on another sub-reddit for more advice.
I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years.
Within the past month he keeps buying stickers and posters of naked anime / hentai and putting it everywhere in the apartment. I'm really not comfortable with this, and it bothers me even more because I sometimes have to pick up my nephew that is 10 from school and I watch him at the apartment until someone picks him up to go home. My mom also comes to visit so I try to hide the stuff but there is so much it's really difficult. He also has some in his car and it's noticeable to passengers, for example his best friend saw it and said, " why tf do you have naked pictures of women in your car dude? Your gf is right here." And my boyfriend just laughed and didn't say anything. The picture I'm referencing for that situation is a real person btw, idk who the model is or anything.
He also has a huge poster (made out of cloth, I know there is another name for this but I can't remember), of a naked anime girl fingering herself. ( it covers the entire wall, like 6 feet tall)
I don't even know what to do anymore. I told him I didn't like it and that I felt disrespected, but he just says, " I can't have anything nice." His friends have even asked me privately on the side why is he doing this and they feel bad for me.
Ever since he got his job as a correctional officer last year he completely changed. I don't know what to do.
