So this happend 2 months ago and I am still super embarrassed and suicidal since then.
Okay so, I was in class and my crush was called to solve a problem on the board.
Since nobody could see me, I whipped out my schlong and started jerking.
But the problem was when I came.
When I came, it was so hard it made a loud sound. Everyone looked at me. I was ashamed and killed myself right as I went to the bathroom.
1
You read the title, I just cannot believe I said the “g” word on accident. Am I even an atheist anymore? I don’t like religion or anything but like maybe it infiltrated me and is manipulating me to say “oh my g*d” instead of “oh my science”. Please guys it wasn’t me, I didn’t mean it. I’m very disappointed in myself, I think I need to go to science camp or go to therapy. What if I’m secretly religious? what should I do? Is my foreskin going to fall off?? Please can someone give me advice, any advice is appreciated.
Best regards,
-an atheist(?)
😍😍😍😍omg I love a man who gets winded walking from the fridge to his gaming chair and back😍 hearing him huff and puff like an asthmatic rhinoceros makes my honey drip if you know what I mean.
Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger. Will be thinking of you tonight 😏🤭😍
Apolgy for bad english
I was at work eating dorito wen phone ring.
“Club Penguin must die”
“ok”
I go to clubpenguin.com and press kil
Now many people sad and cry
AITA?
Edit:
INFO: am sry to kil your favorite game but order is order
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Edit: omg thank for first gold and platinum!!!2)?1 I so hap
(No but actually I’ve never had premium so thanks to whoever did that)
I need a girlfriend between the age of 15-17, she needs to have either colored hair or their natural hair needs to be darker than brown hair. They need clout and preferably should be really hot, and they need to laugh at every one of my jokes, even the not funny ones. They also need to have a juice ass, she also needs to be stable. Psychically and mentally . She needs to be a rock, she needs to stable enough to punch in the chest and be able to survive and withstand. She needs to be emotionally stabel enough for me to bully her reltenlessly and her be okay. She also needs to be a fan of the following youtubers Captian Sparkles, PewDiePie, MarkiePoo, Minecraft, JackieSepticEye , Jenna Marbles, JeffSwiper, Grandayy, Not Dolan Dark, and Dude Perfect. She needs to be my edgy weeb gf and be able to send me funny memes (but not from trashgram) and have at least 10k Karma, any less will be a disqualification. she also needs to be a fan of the harry Potter films but i haven't read the books so idk about them, she has to be in Griffendor (even though I am hufflepuff) and hate any slitheryn. She must also be less than 5'5 or I will step on her. I need her to hate anime but she needs to be a fan of the game Persona 5 but her only romance options should be Goth Doctor, if she choose Ann she gets a lethal injection
Fresh off the boat, from facebook, kid? heh I remember when I was just like you. Braindead. Lemme give you a tip so you can make it in this cyber sanctuary: never make jokes like that. You got no reputation here, you got no name, you got jackshit here. It's survival of the fittest and you ain't gonna survive long on reddit by saying stupid jokes that your little hugbox cuntsucking facebook friends would like. None of that here. You don't share. You don't like. This ain't facebook, kid. This is reddit. We have REAL intellectual discussion, something I don't think you're all that familiar with. You don't like it, you can hit the bricks on over to imgur, you john oliver watching son of a bitch. I hope you don't tho. I hope you stay here and learn our ways. Things are different here, unlike any other place that the light of internet pop culture reaches. You can be anything here. Me ? heh, I'm a judge.. this place.... this place has a lot to offer... heh you'll see, kid . . . that is if you can handle it.