navy seal

Navy Seals of Nursing

Originally its the Navy Seals copypasta from 4chan but changed to nursing.

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class at the University of Phoenix, and I've been involved in numerous patient safety workshops, and I have over 300 "good-catches." I am trained in medication administration and I'm the top ass wiper in the entire hospital. You are nothing to me but just another Foley catheter. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of nurses across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggof. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can cannulate you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in fall prevention, but I have access to the entire arsenal of PRN suppositories and I will use them to their full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, med student.

What the jiminy crickets did you just flaming say about me, you little bozo?

Its one of the many parodies of the Navy Seals copypasta that started from 4chan.

What the jiminy crickets did you just flaming say about me, you little bozo? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Cub Scouts, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret camping trips in Wyoming, and I have over 300 confirmed knots. I am trained in first aid and I’m the top bandager in the entire US Boy Scouts (of America). You are nothing to me but just another friendly face. I will clean your wounds for you with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this annual trip, mark my words. You think you can get away with saying those shenanigans to me over the Internet? Think again, finkle. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of MSN friends across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the seminars, man. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your bake sale. You’re frigging done, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can tie knots in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in road safety, but I have access to the entire manual of the United States Boy Scouts (of America) and I will use it to its full extent to train your miserable butt on the facts of the continents, you little schmuck. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your silly tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goshdarned sillyhead. I will throw leaves all over you and you will dance in them. You’re friggin done, kiddo.

What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat?

What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I’ll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I’ve led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o’ swag. I’ll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o’ pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o’ monsoon that’ll wipe ye off the map. You’re sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o’er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o’ the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I’ll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o’ the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn’t, ye didn’t, and now ye’ll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I’ll shit fury all over ye and ye’ll drown in the depths o’ it. You’re fish food now.

Based on the original ‘Navy Seals‘ copypasta

Navy Seals Uwu version

w-what the fwickk did you just fwickking say about me,,, y-you wittle m-meanie? i-i’ll have you know i gwaduated t-top of my cwass in the navy seaws, and i’ve been invowved in numewous s-secwet w-waids on aw-quaeda, and i have o-over 300 confiwmed kills ☆⌒ヽ(“､)chu i am twained in g-gowiwwa w-wawfare and i’m the top sniper in the e-entire us a-awmed fowces〜☆ you are nothing t-to me b-but just a-another tawget ☆:・ﾟ i will wipe you the fwickk out with pwecision the wikes of which has never been seen before on this eawth, mawk my fwickking wowds-.- you think you can get away with saying that p-poopoo to me over the intewnet〜☆ t-think again (.).., f-fwickker ☆:・ﾟ a-as we speak i am contacting my secwet netwowk of spies acwoss the u-usa and youw i-ip is b-being twaced wight now so y-you better pwepare f-fow the s-stowm, maggot. the stowm t-that wipes out the pathetic wittle thing you call youw w-wife (≧◡≦) ur fwickking dead (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄).. kid ☆⌒ヽ(“､)chu i c-can be anywhere uguu.., anytime (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄).. and i c-can k-kill y-you in over seven hundwed ways, and that’s j-just with my bare hands. not onwy am i extensivewy twained i-in u-unawmed c-combat, but i have access to t-the entire awsenaw of the united states mawine cowps and i w-will use it to its full extent to wipe y-youw misewable boi pussy off the face of the c-continent, you wittle p-poopoo. if onwy y-you couwd have k-known what unhowy wetwibution youw wittle “cwevew” c-comment w-was about to bwing d-down upon you, maybe you w-wouwd have hewd youw fwickking tongue. but you couwdn’t, you didn’tO.o and now ur p-paying the pwice, you goddamn idiot. i will poopoo fuwy all over y-you and you will dwown in it (≧◡≦) ur fwickking dead, k-kiddo.

Spanish Navy Seal copypasta

Spanish version of the Navy Seals copypasta — Original Navy Seal copypasta

Qué mierda acabas de decir sobre mí, pequeña perra? Te haré saber que me gradué de honor en mi clase de los Navy Seals,he estado envuelto en numerosos ataques sorpresa a Al-Quaeda, y tengo 300 asesinatos confirmados. Estoy entrenado en tácticas de guerra revolucionistas y soy el mejor francotirador en todas las fuerzas armadas de la US. No eres nada para mí, sólo un blanco más. Te borraré con una precisión nunca vista antes en este planeta, recuerda mis putas palabras. Piensas que te puedes salir con la tuya diciéndome esa mierda a través de la internet? Piensa otra vez, cabrón. Mientras hablamos estoy contactando my red secreta de espías alrededor de los Estados Unidos y tu IP está siendo rastreada en este mismo instante,así que deberías prepararte para la tormenta, gusano. La tormenta que destroza la patética cosa que llamas tu vida. Estás muerto,chico. Puedo estar dondequiera, cuandosea, y puedo matarte en más de setecientas formas, y éso sólo con mis manos desnudas. No sólo estoy entrenado extensivamente en combate desarmado, sino que también tengo acceso al arsenal entero de la Marina de los Estados Unidos y la usaré para borrar tu miserable existencia de la faz de continente,pequeña mierda. Si tan sólo hubieras cerrado tu pinche boca. Pero no pudiste, no lo hiciste, y ahora es cuando pagas el precio, maldito idiota. Haré llover furia sobre ti y te ahogarás en ella. Estás muerto,chaval

Navy seal copypasta (Original)

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.