You all might wonder why it took me so long to start masturbating, it is because I didn't even know what masturbation is and how it feels when I was in pre-puberty. No one talked to me about it. I think I was pretty lucky because my life would have been ruined if I started masturbation at an early age. As of now, I am studying computer science at one of the top five universities in my country. I am successful to an extent. Now getting to the point.........
I read many confessions on how people are seeking help to stop masturbating, telling how they regret doing it, how it physically weakens them, etc. and I thought I was lucky to not get addicted to this. I was happy and all and also when my friends ask me if I ever masturbated, I would proudly say no, for which they start to suspect me that I was lying which indeed I was not. I in return asked them if they ever did that, and the response was pretty much expected.
Everything was going well, but today, I wanted to experience masturbation and how having an orgasm feels. Right after my mom left to get groceries, I locked the main door and headed to my room, and pulled my pants down. I started playing porn (yes, I watch porn but never masturbated to it) and was about to hold my penis to jerk it. I felt that this would make more sense to do it in the bathroom so I can clean it all up after I ejaculate. I headed to the bathroom, pulled my pants down, held my penis with my left hand and my phone in my right hand, and started to jerk it. I felt a little uncomfortable while doing it, and found out I was doing it with the wrong hand. I quickly closed porn, headed to the wash basin, and washed my left hand. I again headed to my room and started jerking it with my right hand but it wasn't erect. I switched videos but it still didn't work. Lastly, I played a lesbian seduction video and I started jerking off with my right hand. I didn't feel anything yet, I thought I was doing it wrong. I then got forcibly aroused, made my penis forcibly erect, and started jerking off. It worked, I started to feel something. I think this is what an orgasm feels like. It felt so good. It then felt like I have to ejaculate and I brought my penis near to the potty pot (I don't know what it's called) and ejaculated like 3 or 4 translucent thick white drops. I wanted to jerk it off but it felt like a pleasure-pain. I stopped there and cleaned my hands, my penis tip, and my bathroom and headed out. I might want to do it later but I should also need some privacy. I might not do it for a long time because I have to return to my college as it reopens this month end.
I would like my fellow teenagers to comment on this, every comment shall be taken constructively. I might be the oldest teenager but I don't think I have any good experience with things as most of you do. I am the kind of person who waits for the first kiss till marriage and has no plans to hook up in the meantime.
I AM ANNOUNCING MY IMMINENT MASTURBATION. I am aware that the announcement of imminent masturbation has been a serious reocurring issue lately, and I am here with my bottom-level social skills to ensure that it will only worsen. I hope that this server full of mostly male members will appreciate the fact that I will soon be cumming, and offer me that coveted high-five that I so surely deserve. As the announcement of imminent masturbation is NOT in the current ruleset, I will continue to toe this line. Any and all action taken against me by the mod team will be considered extra judicial and I will retaliate by mobilizing my army of alts. If any males want to provide me a high-five or emotial gratification, please do so. If any females wish to provide me sexual gratification, ew. Thank you, and please remember: I AM NOW MASTURBATING
@everyone Please DO NOT announce to the server when you are going to masturbate.
This has been a reoccurring issue, and I'm not sure why some people have such under-developed social skills that they think that a server full of mostly male strangers would need to know that.
No one is going to be impressed and give you a high-five (especially considering where that hand has been.) I don't want to add this to the rules, since it would be embarrassing for new users to see that we have a problem with this, but it is going to be enforced as a rule from now on.
Teenager allegedly masturbated a jaw-dropping 56 times non-stop before dying of a heart attack, in the process, even breaking the world record and was awarded a world record certificate by a Guinness representative who later arrived at the home.
Jerome Carpenter was found dead in his bedroom after apparently masturbating too much. It is speculated that Jerome was suffering from depression due to being “extremely lonely”.
Jerome’s mother called Portland police after discovering his corpse in his room. Jerome’s mother told Huzlers reporters “one hour passed since I had called him down for lunch, Jerome was the kind of boy to steal food off your plate when you were not looking, I knew something was wrong when he didn’t come down to eat, he was a great kid,” she finished as she began to cry.
Police arrived at the home about an hour after Ms. Carpenter called them. Officer Dean Marrow told Huzler reporters what they saw when they opened Jerome’s bedroom door. “The young man was on his bed… his penis was detached from his body, it must have been so intense it just came off his body, we found his penis gripped in his left hand so tightly we couldn’t get it out, it was tragic.”
Investigators are still investigating the case for more information. Jerome’s funeral will take place sometime next week.
I masterbated for six hours yesterday. I am a complete embarrassment of a human being. I am a disgusting pervert who masturbates to girls that I know IRL. I will not be able to stop this addiction unless I have my penis removed.
Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life. Masturbating is more important than your education and life.
First of all, you're lying. You fap every goddamn day, any month of the year.
And the thing is, the memes are stupid. How the fuck did this bullshit even start? It's just WEIRD. Every goddamn year now, I get a little taste of how asexual people must feel, hearing about sex all the time.
I mean, I'm a randy, horny bastard, but there is just a fucking limit to how many times I can hear about fapping. Or, rather, not fapping.
Be an adult, please. Don't participate in this no-fap shit. Or, at the very least, don't fucking talk about it. You're boring everyone else. Think about it rationally for a second: can you really expect anyone to TRULY be interested in hearing about how you're not jerking your meat?
