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Geometry Dash

Coffee is a cheat

    This probably sounds like a clickbait title or something, but just for context, I've pretty much never drank coffee, but, yesterday I was feeling pretty tired and felt like I had no energy to do anything, so I decided to buy a cup o coffee

After that, I was still feeling pretty tired, but wanted to play some gd anyway, so I tried death moon

I had 40% on it before, and, after like 15 minutes of practice, I managed to get 71

I would've continued, but I my hand was shaking, and wasn't able to get consistent enough, so I left it like this

This wasn't the part that surprised me though, today I was feeling better, but when I got to play gd, I was baffled at how bad i was doing, especially at wave like, goddamn, this might be reason enough to start drinking coffee

That being said, it's probably not a good idea to start drinking coffee if you're under 18, especially just for a game I'm not an expert on this, so idk how much it matters, but I'll say it anyway, just to be safe

    If you’re not careful and you noclip out of in the wrong area

      If you're not careful and you noclip out of reality in the wrong areas, you'll end up in the Backrooms, approximately six hundred million square miles of randomly segmented empty rooms to be trapped in, God save you if you hear something wandering around nearby because it sure as hell has heard you

      Geometry Dash (Congregation)

      If you're not careful and you noclip out of Geometry Dash in the wrong areas of a level, you'll end up in Congregation, where it's nothing but the faint glow of pink, blue, and red lights, the single tones of the song, the endless awkward timings at minimum frame windows, and approximately 3 minutes and 4 seconds of repetitive gameplay to be trapped in. RobTop save you if you fall into 42%, because it sure as Tartarus will catch you off guard.

      The objectification of gd users has gone too far

        So there I am, eating my lunch playing gd when a group of females come up to me, obviously trying to flirt with me, talking about what my hardest is or something. They eventually stopped talking to me though for some reason as soon as I started demonstrating my clearly superior skill and intellect at the game (I don't see why honestly).

This has not been an isolated incident, for the past several weeks at my middle school every woman has tried to court me. I've even gone as far as to sit in the most isolated part of the lunch room away from everywhere else and put my stuff to block anyone sitting next to me, but an asian girl (5/10 imo) literally moved my stuff and started talking to me about how difficult Acu is. Listen, I don't care about your "difficult" levels, Acu is FAR from a challenge. I don't struggle on levels. and after repeatedly demonstrating that I was not interested in "Playing Pickle Chamber by Acratic" she finally left me alone. I wish these girls would just stop worshiping me just because I've done a main list level (which was not even remotely hard for me btw).

The worst ones are the ones that don't even play gd. We'll be having a nice, normal conversation and the topic of what games I play comes up. As soon as I mention the letters "GD" I see the change immediately. The blushing and flustering, the clear advances, and so on. What makes a lowly non-gd player think they would EVER have a chance with me? What makes them think I would ever have a family that considers Touhou a rhythm "game" worth playing?

Now, you may think I'm just extremely handsome (which I am) and that's what causes this, however my decently attractive acquaintances who play OSU (not smart enough to be considered friends imo) have no problems with this.

People need to stop fetishizing us GD players. If you just want cheap sex, literally the Minecraft normies are right there. Anyone else agree?

        KaiGuy

          he is genuinely and unironically one of the most egotistical bullshit annoying self absorbed narcissistic wastes of space on the internet. i cannot seriously even begin to fathom where his world endingly large ego stemmed from when he gained 1m subs by abusing the algorithm, shitting on the only thing hes popular for, using young childrens attention spans for fame, and then turning around and saying he doesnt care about the community and acts like people that take the game seriously are losers. it makes my fucking blood boil how he can just say stuff and pretend he is physically, morally, and intellectually superior to this community. his physique is so incredibly mid it pains me to see him show it off, his advice on improving on life is ripped from andrew tate and his dickriding fanbase, and his "passion and drive" that he claims would make him the "best gd content creator" is only existent for shoving his head further up his own ass to try and inflate his self importance. fuck this guy is annoying. matter fact im not done. it fucking PAINS me that this actual chud has more subs than the top 5 players combined. scratch that, grab ur fav content creators and add their fans together and its still less. EVW was the pioneer for GD content creation and hes not at 1m. Doggie beat/verified the top 1 demon SEVERAL times, makes full length videos and edited for others, barely scraping 100k. Npesta, Aeon, Tride, Wulzy, Juniper, literally any player that has sunk COUNTLESS hours into streaming, playing the hardest levels, puts passion and care about the game into their videos and sharing that with the community, only for this fucking dickhead to shit on them, call them losers for caring about the game, pretending that he could be better than them if he "tried and cared" is so goddamn infuritiating. i dont see how he gets away with it

          Geometry Dash Girlfriend

            Geometry Dash copypasta
            It was a night like any other. I was grinding out Acu (my first extreme) on my phone while on class, when I noticed something. A woman. A female human. A member of the Homo Sapiens Sapiens species with XX chromosomes. Immediately, my primal instincts activated, and my dick became harder than a diamond, resembling a sword that could slice a man in 2. Of course, one could claim that she just was asking her friend for a pencil and happened to make eye contact with me for 0.2 seconds, but I digress. I quickly volted towards her, and said "I have 4K stars and 120 demons in GD". As any reasonable individual would, she immediately fell in love with me, and proceeded to have sex right there and now, with me yelling "Go at 67%" in the middle of the procedure. Nowadays I am a proud father of 2 and have a lovely wife, all thanks to GD.