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This is the pinnacle of German humour and it’s pathetic

    4chan "This is the pinnacle of German humour" origin
    This is the pinnacle of German humour and it's pathetic. I can imagine him snorting to himself as he typed this, as if this was an absolute spirit bomb of a comment, and then reading it out loud in his disgusting language "schlieben fleeb hach jurgeflachtung" before falling into a coughing fit from the laughter. I almost pity him.

    Anon on IQ scores

      Original 4chan thread on how IQ relates to abstract cognitive functions as hypothetical thinking, recursion, cognitive empathy, sequencing, mapping
      >I did IQ research as a grad student, and it involved a lot of this stuff. Did you know that most people (95%+) with less than 90 IQ can't understand conditional hypotheticals?
      >For example:
      >How would you have felt yesterday evening if you hadn't eaten breakfast or lunch?
      >What do you mean? I did eat breakfast and lunch.
      >Yes, but if you had not, how would you have felt?
      >Why are you saying that I didn't eat breakfast? I just told you that I did.
      >Imagine that you hadn't eaten it, though. How would you have felt?
      >I don't understand the question.
      >It's really fascinating. We did research on convicts in San Quentin. They're absolute fucking retards, at least 50% illiterate.
      >Other interesting phenomenon around IQ involves recursion.
      >For example:
      >Write a story with two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue. >Most literate people can manage this, especially once you give them an example.
      >Write a story with two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue.
      >In this story, one of the characters must be describing a story with at least two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue.
      >If you have less than 90 IQ, this second exercise is basically completely impossible.
      >Add a third level ('frame') to the story, and even IQ 100's start to get mixed up with the names and who's talking. >Turns out Scheherazade was an IQ test!
      >Time is practically impossible to understand for sub 80's. They exist only in the present, can barely reflect on the past and can't plan for the future at all.
      >Sub 90's struggle with anachronism too. For example, I remember the 80-85's stumbling on logic problems that involved common sense anachronism stuff.
      >For instance:
      >Why do you think that military strategists in WWII didn't use laptop computers to help develop their strategies? >I guess they didn't want to get hacked by Nazis?
      >Admittedly you could argue that this is a history knowledge question, not quite a logic sequencing question, but you get the idea.
      >Sequencing is super hard for them to track, but most 100+ have no problem with it, although I imagine that a movie like Memento strains them a little.
      >Recursion was definitely the killer, though.
      >Recursive thinking and recursive knowledge seems genuinely hard for people of even average intelligence (although at San Quentin there weren't too many of those!)
      >It's the main reason why so many people with sub-90 IQ are sociopathic or psychopathic. They don't have the mental computing power to model other people's thoughts and feelings. I've seen it over and over with convicts. >How do you think that man felt when you beat him?
      >Dunno.
      >How do you think that boy's mother felt when she heard that her son was dead?
      >Dunno.
      >It comes across as psychopathic, but these people literally don't have the brainpower to build even a crude model of someone else's mind, let alone populate it with events that are in the past.
      >I forgot to mention another important part of abstract reasoning, which is 'mapping'. Basically, expressing one thing in terms of another.
      >For example:
      >Imagine a picture of an arrow, colored in a gradient from yellow to green, following the direction of the arrow. >Imagine a one-way residential street, with ascending house numbers, with the lowest number being at the entrance of the street and the highest number being at the exit.
      >If you mapped the arrow onto the street, what color would house number 1 be?
      >This question really isn't tricky for most 100+s. It has some minor ambiguities, but anyone of normal intelligence can do the 'mapping': that is, the expression of one thing in terms of another.
      >However, for sub-90's, this stuff is REALLY difficult. They struggle terribly with it. Sub 80's just can't do it at all. >Anything under 90 will routinely make errors with even commonplace mapping (like subway maps, time schedules, etc.) Sub 85s start to get into the territory where they can't learn to read, as symbolic mapping of phonemes (or even morphemes) even with constant drilling, is just too tricky.
      >Math is another area I could get into, but the long and the short of it is that it's heavily decided by IQ. That's a bit tautological, since it's a principal IQ measurement, but you know what I mean.
      >As for the criminal narcissists etc: I honestly don't know. However, sufficiently high IQ autists can emulate theory of mind, and do. If you're smart enough, you can build a little simulator in your brain. You also need to be smart enough to appreciate the utility of it.
      >I suspect that any autist or narcissist over 120 can do this stuff regularly without getting tired, but it's like playing a strenuous game of chess for them. They really don't have the 'hardware' for empathy. That's it.
      >reeeee formatting
      fuck you I already reformatted it for normie consumption and have been disseminating it, not retranslating to autist.

      DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city

        DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city, it’s so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like i’m in one of my favourite TV SHOWS. you should totally come on down to my studio apartment, it’s got EXPOSED RED BRICK walls and everything, we can crack open a nice hoppy ipa or three and get crazy watching some cartoons on adult swim! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the barcade- listen here, right, it’s a BAR where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go DRINK. BUT!!!! it’s also an ARCADE like when we were kids, so we can play awesome VIDEO GAMES, without dumb kids bothering us. speaking of which megan and i have finally decided to tie the knot- literally -we’re both getting snipped tomorrow at the hospital, that way we can save money to spent more on ourselves and our FURBABIES. i’m fuckin JACKED man, i’m gonna SLAM this craft beer and pop open another one!!!

        Ivan Chesnokov

          Who is Ivan Chesnokov?

          Ivan Chesnokov appears to be a Russian poster on various firearms forums, most prominently 4chan /k/. Ivan is justifiably quite proud of Russian history and has strong views about firearms, especially about not modifying military surplus firearms. Well, “strong views” only hints at the depth of his convictions and the adamancy of his presentation.

          Or on the other hand, possibly Ivan is just a wonderfully amusing troll.

          I have tried to assemble an archive of his wisdom.

          Ivan responds to railing an AK

          WHY YOU WANT RAIL FOR KALASHNIKOV? IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH AS PROCURED FROM IZHEVSK MECHANICAL WORKS? YOU THINK NEEDS IMPROVEMENT? THEN MAYBE YOU FIND JOB WITH ARMY OF RUSSIA! YOU HAVE DRINKS WITH MIKHAIL KALASHNIKOV, TRADE STORY OF MANY WEAPONS DESIGNED AND DETAILS OF SCHOOL FOR ENGINEERING!
          
          OR MAYBE YOU NOT DO THIS. PROBABLY IS BECAUSE YOU NEVER DESIGN WEAPON IN WHOLE LIFE. YOU LOOK AT FINE RUSSIAN RIFLE, THINK IT NEED CRAZY SHIT STICK ON ALL SIDES OF WEAPON. YOU HAVE DISEASE OF AMERICAN CAPITALIST, CHANGE THING THAT IS FINE FOR NO REASON EXCEPT TO LOOK DIFFERENT FROM COMRADE. YOU PUT CHEAP FLASHLIGHT OF CHINESE SLAVE FACTORY ON ONE SIDE, YOU PUT BAD SCOPE OF AMERICAN MIDDLE WEST ON OTHER SIDE, YOU PUT FRONT PISTOL GRIP ON BOTTOM SO YOU ARE LIKE AMERICAN MOVIE GUY JOHN RAMBO. MAYBE YOU PUT SEX DILDO ON TOP TO FUCK YOURSELF IN ASSHOLE FOR MAKING SHAMEFUL TRAVESTY OF RIFLE OF MIKHAIL KALASHNIKOV, NO?
          
          RIFLE IS FINE. YOU FUCK IT, IT ONLY GET HEAVY AND YOU STILL NO HIT LARGEST SIDE OF BARN. GO TO FIRING RANGE, PRACTICE WITH MANY MAGAZINE OF CARTRIDGE. THEN YOU NOT NEED DUMB SHIT PUT ON SIDE OF RIFLE.

          Ivan responds to a ‘Tacticool SKS’

          WHAT IN FUCK IS DONE TO THIS POOR RIFLE? STUPID HICK AMERICAN WITH TEN GALLON HAT AND GIANT PICKUP TRUCK LOOKS AT PERFECTLY FINE SIMONOV KARBIN AND SAYS "NO, RIFLE NEED MORE DUMB SHIT ON IT"?
          
          WHAT IS REASON FOR PISTOL GRIP? IF YOU NEED TO FIRE FROM HIP IN EMERGENCY, NOW HAND IS TWISTED INTO PAINFUL ANGLE AND YOU MISS EVERY ENEMY! LOOK AT WRONG ANGLE OF BAYONET! LOOK AT CHEAP PLASTIC MAGAZINE THAT FEEDS CARTRIDGE LIKE CONSTANTLY JAMMING PEZ CANDY BOX! WHERE DID CLEANING STICK GO?
          
          I HEAR OF 922 LAW IN AMERICA. ADDING PISTOL GRIP TO WEAPON MEANS YOU CHANGE OTHER PARTS. WHAT ELSE YOU FUCK? YOU PUT NEW BOLT EDIFICE? HOW ABOUT BAD FIT RECEIVER COVER FOR CHEAP SCOPE TO SHOW OFF AT HICK PARTY AND NEVER HIT LARGEST SIDE OF BARN?
          
          SURE, IS ONLY YUGOSLAV COPY TYPE BUT IS STILL PROUD DESIGN OF SERGEI SIMONOV. THIS IS LIKE SENDING HIM BIRTHDAY CARD WITH SEVERED OFF THUMB OF DAUGHTER IN ENVELOPE. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY SERGEI! I PISS ON ALL YOU CREATE!" LARGE MOUND FORMS OVER SIMONOV'S GRAVE BY CONSTANT TUMBLING OF HIS ANGRY CORPSE. IS FAULT OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
          
          RIFLE WAS FINE BEFORE YOU FUCK IT. NOW IS TRASH. MAYBE YOU CHECK IN GARAGE AND ORIGINAL BOLT EDIFICE AND WOOD ARE STILL THERE. MAYBE IS NOT TOO LATE TO KEEP RIFLE SOMETHING NOT SHAMEFUL TO TAKE TO FIRING RANGE. TAKE SHIT OF GOAT AWAY AND COULD STILL BE GOOD WEAPON.

          Ivan has some strong opinions on handguns

          MAIN POINT OF SELLING BELGIAN FIVE SEVEN PISTOL IS EXTREME PRICE OF WEAPON AND CARTRIDGE.
          
          BELGIAN FIVE SEVEN IS WEAPON OF MAN WHO WEARS EXPENSIVE ITALIAN FASCIST SUIT OF HAND SEWING, DRIVE HUGE EXPENSIVE NAZI MERCEDES OF A.M.G. SHOP, SAIL ON MASSIVE YACHT TO GREEK ISLANDS. I THINK YOU GET PICTURE. BELGIAN FIVE SEVEN IS WEAPON THAT SAYS IS NO SUCH THING AS CONCERN OF MONEY.
          
          FOR MAN WITHOUT EXPENSIVE SUIT, BIG BLACK MERCEDES, AND MASSIVE YACHT, BELGIAN FIVE SEVEN IS FOR PRETENDING OF BE RICH LIKE BLACK GANGSTER OF AMERICAN CITY WITH GOLD CHAINS OF LOW QUALITY AND JEWELS OF COLORED GLASS. WHEN YOU EXPLAIN USE OF BELGIAN FIVE SEVEN PISTOL IS ONLY FOR SHOOT MAN WITH BULLET VEST WITH CARTRIDGE ILLEGAL TO CIVILIAN, THIS MAN HAS NUCLEAR RAGE. WHOLE IDENTITY OF THIS MAN IS SPENT IN PRETEND PISTOL SHOWS HE IS RICH. IS VERY AMUSE.
          
          FOR REST OF WORLD THERE IS 9 MILLIMETERS OF LUGER WHICH IS SAME WOUND FOR COST LESS.

          MFW I’ve been sucking a man’s cock

            be me
            21
            super straight male
            get horny one night and decide to go use the local glory hole
            actually kinda enjoy it
            half way through person on the other side moans
            it's a guy's moan
            realize ive been sucking a man's cock this entire time
            mfw

            Came out as trans a few days ago

              >came out as trans a few days ago
              >best friend suddenly asked me to be his girlfriend out of nowhere
              >told him that I'm not even on hrt or anything yet so I'm pretty much a dude
              >he said he doesn't care and he wants me htr or not
              >asked him why he's suddenly doing this
              >he said he's making me his before someone else does
              >promised me that I wouldn't regret it because he'd help me become a girl his own way (sex)
              >mfw
              This feels extraordinarily gay sisters... we were bros last week and now he's talking about plowing me and I'm not even on estrogen...

              Original 4chan thread